Page 37
thirty-three
MIRA
My stomach is about to eat itself.
“You need to calm down, sunshine.” Griffin reaches over and gives my hand a squeeze as he pulls into a guest spot at Maddox and Isla’s building. “Everything will be fine.”
I’m not sure that’s true. So far, all our interactions with my brother and his fiancée have been in group settings with plenty of distractions to keep him from looking too closely at the evolving dynamic between me and his best friend.
But tonight? Tonight, we’re having dinner.
Just the four of us. To say I’m nervous is an understatement.
I’m so scared, I may throw up. What if we do something or say something that outs our secret? What if Maddox beats the shit out of Griffin, gets arrested, kicked off the team, then disowns me? Coming here tonight was a mistake.
“Mira.” Griffin’s voice is low and reassuring, and as soon as he parks the G-Wagon, he turns and takes my face in his hands. “Baby, take a deep breath.” He sucks in a deep lungful of air, and I mirror him. “Good. Again.”
“I’m fine,” I tell him after exhaling deeply. “Sorry. I’m just worried.”
Griffin searches my face, a little divot forming between his eyebrows. “You’re worried your brother will find out about us.”
It’s not a question. He knows that’s what has me panicking. “Yes.”
“Would it really be so bad?” His frown deepens and my stomach lurches at the undertones of hurt coloring the question.
“What if we use tonight as an opportunity to tell them we’re married?
There won’t be anyone else around. We’re not out in public, and we’re coming off a win, so your brother will be in a good mood.
Plus, I’m sure he spent all last night getting laid by Teach, so really, I’m not sure there could be a more perfect chance. ”
Despite my anxiety, that makes me chuckle.
It’s tempting. I hate keeping secrets, and this is a big one.
The biggest. But I’m not as optimistic as Griffin about my brother’s reaction.
The last thing I want to do is screw things up between them, let alone do anything to hurt the team’s unity and chance to take the season to the Cup. Not when they’re doing so well.
“I think we should wait.” When Griffin’s expression crumples, I hurry to add, “I don’t want to take away from Madds and Isla’s engagement, you know? And I don’t want to mess things up for you and my brother.”
Griffin’s hazel eyes bounce between mine as he studies me.
Whatever he sees makes him sigh deeply. “Mira, I’ve been friends with your brother for a long time.
We’ve been through lots of shit together.
I love him like a brother, and I know he feels the same way about me.
If he can’t see that we’re perfect for each other and learn to be happy for us, that would suck, but ultimately it’s a risk I’m willing to take. ”
He is? My traitorous heart skips a beat before it races.
While I don’t want Griffin risking anything for me, I also can’t deny that primal longing to have someone fight for me, to claim me against all odds and say fuck it despite all the things they stand to lose.
What person doesn’t want that? I think you’d be hard pressed to find a red-blooded woman alive who doesn’t dream of being the most important thing in her partner’s life. I’m no different.
But I’m also a coward.
“I don’t want you to risk your friendship or your career for me.”
Griffin sighs, leaning forward and pressing his forehead to mine. “Mira, I love your brother, and I love hockey. They’re two of my favorite things in life. Maybe the top two until you came along. But now? I’d give them both up in order to keep you, and I wouldn’t even blink.”
Why does he have to be so perfect? And why am I such a scaredy cat?
All of this should be a no-brainer. I should say Yes, of course you’re right.
Let’s tell my brother we’re married. Let’s tell the world.
But the words won’t come out of my mouth.
They’re stuck in my throat, and no self-pep talks or internal guilt trips can dislodge them.
“Griffin…” My voice is weak and so am I. I’m incapable of finishing the thought.
My husband sighs, his eyes closing as his hands tighten slightly on my face. “Right. Let’s go, then.”
I miss the warmth of his touch the moment he pulls away, and it makes me want to shout that I’m ready. It makes me want to find my courage and tell him he’s worth all the risks, too.
Instead, I climb out of the G-Wagon and take Griffin’s offered hand. He leads me to the elevator in silence, and when it opens on Maddy’s floor, he gives my fingers a squeeze before dropping them.
It’s what I wanted. What I asked for. But I hate it, all the same.
“Hey, you two!” Isla beams when she opens the door for us. She waves us in, then tackles us with hugs. “I’m so glad we’re able to do this. I swear, all the wedding stuff has me so crazy. I hope you don’t feel like I’m neglecting you.”
Grinning, I shake my head. “No, I don’t feel that way.”
“Neither do I, Teach.” Griffin ruffles Isla’s red hair, which earns him a comical scowl from my future sister-in-law. “Man, something smells good.”
“Maddox is finishing up some steaks. Can I get either of you a glass of wine or a beer or something?”
“I’d love a glass of wine,” I say, following Isla into the kitchen where my brother is at the stove. “Hey, Madddy.”
“Hey, Mir. Missed you.” My brother pulls me to his side for a hug. “Thanks for coming over. Wright. How’s it going, man?”
“Hey, bro. It’s going. I’m glad to be home. New York was fun, but way too crowded for my taste.” He and Maddox do the bro-hug thing where it starts as a cross-body high-five and turns into a one-armed hug.
My brother nods in agreement. “Logan was the only one not excited to go home.”
“Yeah, because he hooked up with a bunch of models.” Griffin chuckles and rolls his eyes.
I fight back the little twinge of insecurity that gnaws on my insides.
I trust Griffin. I know he wouldn’t do anything with anyone else, and he spent every night calling me.
Still, the reminder of his past exploits with Logan makes my stomach feel funny.
Maddox grins. “I’m still surprised you didn’t join him. That used to be your scene.”
I hate the way my stomach rolls at that, and I lower my eyes to the floor, not wanting to give away my discomfort. But Griffin notices. Of course he does. He gently nudges me with his shoulder.
“Nah, I told you, man, I’m done with all that. I’m a one-woman guy from now on.”
My cheeks flush with warmth, and the uncomfortable knot in my stomach loosens. I only hope my brother doesn’t notice. Luckily, when I look up, I see that Maddox’s attention is back on the steaks. Unfortunately, Isla is peering at me with a curious glint in her eyes I don’t like.
“And is there someone you want to tell us about?” she asks him.
His smooth chuckle rolls over my body, leaving goose bumps in its wake. “Trust me, Teach. When I can tell you I’ve found the one , I’ll be screaming it from the rooftops.”
Isla studies Griffin, weighing his carefully chosen words, and I almost think we’ve already blown it when her gaze shifts quickly to me.
But if my intelligent friend has her suspicions, she thankfully doesn’t voice them.
Instead, she smiles and rests a hand on Griffin’s arm.
“Well, hopefully that will happen for you soon. You’re a great guy, Griffin. You deserve that.”
“Thanks.” He clears his throat, his voice rough. “That means a lot.”
“All right, enough of this mushy shit,” Maddox says, rolling his eyes. “The food is done, so let’s eat.”
Dinner passes quickly with easy conversation, lots of talk about the upcoming wedding, and so much laughter.
Being here with Griffin, Maddox, and Isla feels so natural that I wonder if Griffin was right.
Maybe this would be the perfect time to tell them we got married.
Because, outside of my mom, these three people are my family.
They’re the closest humans in the world to me, and they mean everything.
How could Maddox and Isla not be happy for me if I tell them I married the man who’s become my best friend?
Sure, I may not have made the decision when I was fully in my right mind, but Griffin makes me happy.
He supports me, believes in me, and cheers me on.
He’s the first person I want to tell good news to, the first person I turn to when I’m upset, the person I want to spend all my time with.
He’s my person.
Surely, Maddox would see that, right?
I’m lost in my thoughts, wrestling with this growing urge to spill it all right here and now, when my brother kicks my shin under the table.
“Ow, Maddy, what the hell?”
Rolling his eyes, he arches an eyebrow. “I said your name like five times. I was trying to get your attention.”
“Okay, well, you have it now.”
Griffin and Isla chuckle when I huff out a breath, sounding like a petulant teenager, but that’s the effect siblings can have on you. They bring you right back to those angsty years when all you did was piss each other off. I shoot my husband a dark look, and the jerk just laughs louder.
“I was going to say that I know you don’t want to talk about what happened with your shithead ex-boyfriend, but I wanted to check on you and make sure you’re good now. You over him?”
It’s been months . Even if I didn’t have Griffin to help me move on from that asshole, I’d still be over him by now. I frown. “Of course I’m over him. I’m good, Maddy. Promise.”
Apparently, that was the reassurance he needed, because his shoulders lose some of their tension as he runs a hand through his dark hair. “Good. I’m glad to hear that because I think I have something to tell you that you’re really going to like.”
Confusion muddies my already distracted thoughts. Does he have more wedding news or something to tell me? I arch an eyebrow and make a face at my brother, which makes him chuckle. “Okay?”
Table of Contents
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- Page 37 (Reading here)
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