Page 42 of The Love Fix (The Sunrise Cove #8)

During the hardest times in Lexi’s life, she’d taken solace from driving. Being on the road, behind the wheel, emptied her

mind and cleared her heart. Recharged her soul.

But as she purposely lost herself on some of Tahoe’s back country highways, bouncing around on the rutted roads so hard it

felt like she might lose a kidney, she couldn’t seem to empty her mind, clear her heart, or recharge her soul.

So she kept going.

She drove up to the top of Donner Summit, then took a rarely used road to Eagle Falls, a place she remembered once going on

a hike with her entire fifth-grade class. She’d hated it at the time, getting all hot and sweaty and dirty, but she thought

maybe as an adult, she could appreciate what ten-year-old Lexi hadn’t been able to.

She’d been prepared to have to park and walk in to the falls, but at some point in the years since, a fire road had gone in,

allowing her to drive Betty all the way to the small lake at the end, and the heart-stopping view of the falls on the far

side of it.

It’d rained a bit the night before, enriching all the vibrancy of the forest, the mountains, the water, all of it so beautiful it was hard to hold on to any negative thoughts.

But sitting on the tailgate of the truck, she gave it the good old college try, watching as the sun angled itself toward the tallest peak, casting the hundred-foot waterfall in pinks and reds and oranges, all of it stealing the breath from her lungs.

Or maybe... maybe that was panic, because now that she was still, it all caved in on her, what she’d managed to do.

She’d blown up the only two relationships in her life that meant... well, everything. It made her feel more than a little

sick inside. She honestly had no idea what to do. She could leave. She could go back to her life. She’d hate it, but she could

do it, pretend she hadn’t been changed by this trip. But at the thought, everything inside her cringed. She knew she’d never

be happy there again.

She wasn’t sure how long she’d sat there when she realized that the sun had sunk much lower now, nearly ducking behind the

mountaintops.

Which meant it was time to go. The wild creatures that lived out here prowled for food at night, and she didn’t intend to

become dinner. But first, she had something she needed to do. She fumbled with her phone for the flashlight app and hoped

the glow wouldn’t draw all the bugs to her as she opened the envelope that had been burning a hole in her pocket.

A letter and a check slid out.

A big fat one.

She realized she’d stopped breathing when her body took over and forced her to draw a deep breath. Gently sliding the check

back into the envelope, she unfolded the letter.

Dearest Lexi,

There’s no good way to dive in, so I’m just going to. I realize I’m probably the last person you want to hear from, but if

you’re reading this, then you’ve already delivered all the previous envelopes. Thank you. I’m eternally grateful to you for

that.

There’s so much I need to say, and I’ve written this at least twenty times. I’m sweating right now trying to figure out how

to reach you, when I know I don’t deserve to. First... and this is the biggie... I’m so, so very proud of you, and the

life you carved out for yourself. I never should’ve let you push me away. You were the child, I was the adult. It was me who

should’ve stood up for you. Instead, I did as I always had, and went the easy route. I don’t think you’ve ever done that,

not once. Because as you learned far before I did, the hard way is worth it.

Second, and I don’t deserve this, but I hope that you can forgive me for the past, and also forgive me for making it as hard

as possible for you to walk away from Ashley. That’s why I did what I did, why I asked—no, begged—Heath to only give you one

envelope every week. I thought if I forced your hand and made you stay for long enough, you and Ash might forge a real relationship.

Please know that I did it out of love, for both of you. You deserved more from me, Lexi. So much more. I’m gone now, but you

still have Ashley. Please, if you believe nothing else, believe this—you deserve love, and you are loved. All you have to do is reach out and accept it. It’s not too late. It’s never too late.

To the moon and back,

Mom

Lexi sat on that tailgate, surrounded by endlessly high peaks and clouds, stunned and eyes burning. The only sound was her heart pounding against her rib cage and a few birds squawking at her.

Her mom had taken responsibility for all of it. If someone had told her a couple hundred words would change everything, she’d

have laughed her head off.

But they had. They did.

It’s not too late. It’s never too late.

Wanting, needing, to believe that, she hopped off the tailgate and climbed into the truck, getting back to Ashley and Heath

her only goal. Cranking the truck’s engine over, she shoved it into reverse. She got maybe ten feet before she felt a thump

thump thump beneath her. “No, no, no, no... Are you kidding me?”

Knocking her head into the headrest, she stared out the windshield at the quickly darkening sky. Trust her to get herself

into this mess. Sliding out of the truck, she took a peek, and sure enough, her back left tire was flat as a pancake. She

pulled out her phone.

No service.

“Of course. Not surprised at all.” She swore the air blue, even making up a few new oaths while she was at it, then climbed

into the bed of the truck to check on the spare. It looked good. All she needed now was the tool kit, but... no tool kit.

Like a mature adult, she jumped down and kicked the flat tire, then swore some more as she hopped around on her good foot,

holding her now aching toes.

When the pain ebbed, she tipped her head back and stared skyward. “Seriously, Karma?” For the first time in... well, forever,

she had a nest egg— thank you, Mom . She could take a deep breath, only she couldn’t because instead of being thrilled and excited, all she felt was dread and sorrow bouncing around in her chest.

And loneliness.

Not the usual and vague general loneliness she’d carried around for too long, but a very specific one. She didn’t want to

be alone, always watching her own back. She wanted her sister. She wanted Heath.

And also, she wanted a damn pizza.

She climbed inside the warm cab of the truck. “Okay, genius, now what?” Her stomach growled, so she looked around for a food

stash, hitting pay dirt inside the glove box.

A single-serving-size bag of one of Ashley’s organic, no-salt, no-fat plain chips. There was a sticky note on it that read:

Lexi— EAT WHEN HANGRY!

She gave a half laugh, half sob. She would’ve by far preferred fries, but she’d deal. She patted the dash. “I’m going to have

to walk until I can get reception or can find help,” she told the truck. “Be good.”

She started out, lifting her phone high every few yards, checking for bars. She thought back to the last time she’d seen another

vehicle—at least a mile back at the last crossroads.

When she got there, she looked right, then left.

No cars.

And almost no daylight left.

She’d never thought of herself as helpless, and refused to do so now.

She’d been wrong to push Ashley and Heath away, and the irony of it didn’t escape her.

Apparently, she’d learned nothing from doing the same to her mom all those years ago.

Each time she’d done it, it’d been an implosion of everything she kept inside, a manifestation of her deep-rooted fears of being alone.

A self-fulfilling prophecy, as it turned out.

Please, if you believe nothing else, believe this—you deserve love, and you are loved. All you have to do is reach out and accept it. It’s not too late. It’s never too late.

She really, really hoped that was true, and with the sudden clarity only the very emotionally challenged like herself would take so long to

get, her epiphany hit her in the face.

It wasn’t the check that would guarantee her future.

It was the people she’d let in.

She looked at her phone again. One bar! She started moving faster, and after another hundred yards, she had two bars. Sucking

in a breath, she accessed her favorites. There were only two names there. She knew she could call either of them. Even after

all she’d said, they’d show up for her in a single heartbeat, no questions asked.

No matter what she’d always thought, she was no island of one. For the first time in her life, she wanted a future that included

real connections. People who cared about her. She wanted that with Ashley.

And Heath.

She ached to hear his voice, but... sometimes you had to learn to crawl before you could walk. Ashley was definitely the

easier of the two to face first. Would Heath show up if she needed him? Absolutely. Would he make her work for it, expecting

her to talk things through? Also yes.

Baby steps.

Ashley answered on the first ring with a gasped, “Lexi? Is that you? Are you okay? ”

She blinked back tears. “Yes. The truck got a flat, and I can’t find the tire kit.”

“Oh crap. Oh crap, I’m so sorry! The tire kit’s on the floor in the garage. I had to buy a new one and forgot to put it in

the truck. But I’ve got roadside assistance, hold on and I’ll get you the info—”

“I don’t think roadside will come up here. I’m up at Eagle Falls. I got off the Eighty at the Summit, then followed the fire

road to the small lake there.”

Ashley didn’t respond, and Lexi looked at the phone.

The call had been dropped.

Uneasily, she turned in a slow circle. An owl hooted. Wind rustled the pines. Or at least she hoped it was wind. Dusk had

vanished in a blink, replaced by a midnight blue sky. Fear skittered down her spine as she quickly accessed her flashlight

app. The feeble light bounced in front of her as she started running back to the truck. She’d never enjoyed running so every

single part of her body protested, but there was that whole not-wanting-to-be-dinner thing.

A buzz of an insect in her face, trying to get into her mouth or up her nose, had her letting out a girlie scream as she tripped

over her own feet and hit dirt hard enough to make her knees and palms ache. She jumped right back up, waving her hands in

the air, doing the bug dance. It was the howl of a coyote that made her go absolutely still for a single heartbeat before

she took off again, going full tilt out to the truck, scrambling inside, slamming the door, and locking it.

Like coyotes had opposable thumbs.

Panting, she leaned back and closed her eyes. When exactly had the call with Ashley cut out? Had she heard where Lexi was? Not knowing played with her mind, made her heart race. Once again, she hugged the small bag of chips to her chest—

Uh-oh. She suddenly realized the truck was listing to the side more than it had been. A lot more. Had more than one tire gone

flat? She peered out the window. She couldn’t see from here. She’d just take a super quick peek. Sliding out, she shut the

door behind her to keep the bugs out.

Yep. Two flats. And that took talent. She ate another chip and went to get back in the truck.

The door was locked.

So was the passenger side. Which made it official, she was an idiot. Probably a dead idiot, but she’d been at rock bottom

before. Her survival instincts were strong, strong enough to have her climbing onto the hood and leaning back against the

windshield. Eating the chips that she could admit weren’t as bad as she’d thought, she stared up at the sky, which was really

showing off tonight. Stars twinkling like diamonds and the glow of a few streaky clouds. She sat there, just her and a check

that once upon a time she’d actually believed would change her life.

But she’d never been more wrong. Ashley had changed her life.

Heath had changed her life.

She missed them. She missed Ashley making her weird food. She missed Heath challenging her, making her laugh... looking

at her like she was worth something.

A wind picked up, rustling and riling up the tall pines.

The owl hooted again. Insects trilled. Those streaky clouds crept across the midnight sky on the wind, merging, growing, slowly obscuring the stars and moon, until it felt like the sky was closing in on her.

Or maybe that was the rustling in the manzanita bushes off to her right.

She whipped her head in that direction, blinking as if that would help her see.

“Hey,” she called out. “There’s nothing to see here, just keep moving along!”

The whole forest went silent at her voice. She fumbled to turn on her flashlight again and aimed the weak beam at the foliage

on her right. She saw nothing but... oh crap... two red glowing eyes.

No, four . Four glowing eyes.

Accompanied by a low growl...