Page 20

Elliot was hurting. His heart was hurting, and Alexander couldn’t do a damn thing to stop the pain. He held Elliot the entire helicopter ride back to land, then in the car his mother sent to collect them. Refusing to let go until their feet touched down on the ferryboat meant to take them to Sugarplum Island, and even then, he held Elliot’s hand.

It was almost morning by the time the small island came into view. In the half-light, surrounded by thick morning fog, Alexander spotted a crowd of Sugarplumians standing on the dock, holding signs in the air.

Welcome Home, Elliot , one sign said.

Sorry I chased you with a rake that time , said another.

In the center of the dock stood Twylah Bishop, beaming ear to ear and waving grandly. Alexander glanced over at Elliot, noticing how every trace of fear or worry had vanished, replaced by a look of confusion.

Alexander squeezed his hand. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong. I just don’t understand why the entire village showed up to greet us.”

Alexander leaned down and kissed Elliot gently on the lips. “Mom probably told them all about you. This is a really tight-knit community. They’re weary of tourists, and there are so few residents, they’ve formed a found family of sorts.” He cupped Elliot’s cheek. “After you left last time, Mom went around and scolded everyone who was nasty to you when you were here. She said they were apologizing to her for days.”

Elliot’s brows furrowed. “Why would she do that? She barely knew me. We only met once.”

Alexander shook his head, lightly tapping Elliot’s temple. “I think the memory of your visits must have been held in the holes the cake frosting filled up. You came here once a week for over a year. When we used to talk about you—before we found each other on the boat—I would ask about you.” Alexander blushed. “Quite often. I’m afraid I may have been a bit obsessed.”

Elliot’s eyes flashed pink-pink-pink . “Yeah?”

Alexander nodded. “Very much. She said you were always kind and courteous, but you never opened up. She tried to get to know you, but you were incredibly shy, apparently.”

“Jared didn’t like me talking to other people. He said my place was at his side, and he was the only friend I needed.” Elliot closed his eyes. “He was not a good friend. If I’d had another friend, I think it may have made everything a bit more bearable.”

Alexander kissed Elliot tenderly on the lips. “And now there’s a whole village of people who want to be your friend. Life has a way of turning itself around sometimes.”

“Not life. You. You turned my world around.”

“In a good way, I hope.”

“In the best way.” He placed his hand on his belly, and Alexander couldn’t help himself. He placed his hand right beside Elliot’s. Their eyes locked, and a faint blush spread across Elliot’s face. Then his eyes bulged, and he took a step back, looking panicked. “What in the world?”

Alexander didn’t know what had gotten into Elliot. He was fine only seconds before. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”

Elliot winced, and he placed two hands on his tummy, his eyes wet with worried tears. “I think something’s wrong with the baby. My tummy feels funny and—” his words ended with a whine, and he slammed his eyes shut.

Alexander rushed forward, pressing his hand against Elliot’s stomach. “Are you hurt? Is it contractions?” It was too soon for Elliot to give birth, Alexander assumed. He wasn’t sure how early hybrid automatons could be born and still be healthy, and the only person who knew was lying at the bottom of the ocean.

“Alexander,” Elliot whined, panicked. “We need to do something. I don’t—I don’t want to lose her.” He seemed surprised by the statement. “We’re supposed to be a family.”

Alexander opened his mouth to reassure him, but before he could get a word out, something pressed against the hand he had resting on Elliot’s belly.

“It feels like there are little bubbles popping inside me. Could it be her heart? Has it given out? What if she’s—” Elliot let out another ungodly cry, and he pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, clamping down.

“Baby, are you in pain? Can you look at me?”

Elliot shook his head rapidly. “Not pain. Pressure. Like she’s trying to get out.”

“Can I lift your shirt and look?”

He whimpered, still unwilling to open his eyes. “Everyone will see my stomach.”

Alexander turned Elliot so his back was to the approaching island. Once his belly was out of their line of sight, Alexander lifted the shirt and watched as the imprint of a foot pushed against Elliot’s skin. It was a strange sight to see, because Alexander had been around expecting mothers before, and he’d seen them kick. Never once had he seen the actual imprint of foot, toes and all. Perhaps it was different because Elliot was an automaton. Alexander wasn’t fully versed in the ins and outs of automaton anatomy, so how was he to know? Whatever the reason, just the sight made his heart race faster.

She was kicking.

Their baby was awake, and she was shoving her foot against her father’s tummy like she was trying to get comfortable. It was the first time it really clicked for Alexander. He was already on board with raising their child as his, but it still felt like he was living somebody else’s happy ending. With her lying dormant inside Elliot, it still felt unreal, but with her first kicks, it was as if she was kicking away any shred of plausible deniability. There was a real live baby under his skin, and in three months—provided Alexander could sort out Elliot’s delivery—she would be out of the comfort of her father’s belly and thrust into the world, looking to them for protection.

Good, Alexander thought, because that was all he’d ever wanted. Love. Someone to care for, and someone who cared for him in return. There would be no further ill-fated hookups with men who wouldn’t remember his name. No coming home to an empty house and watching Hallmark movies to live a vicarious love life. He was going to have a family. It was a realization that left him dizzied, smiling as widely as his smile would stretch, and feeling awestruck. Alexander chuckled, because he felt like he was floating on air.

Tears fell from Elliot’s eyes. “Why are you laughing? She could be dying. Her life could be in danger.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Alexander soothed, pressing their foreheads together. “She’s not in danger. She’s just kicking.” He found Elliot’s hand and guided it to the place Alexander had just felt her kick. Sure enough, within seconds, Elliot’s eyes lit up and his mouth fell open.

“She can move? Inside me?” Elliot gaped at him, looking flabbergasted. He stared down at his belly, watching as her foot poked out again. Somehow, Elliot’s jaw fell even lower. “Is she trying to claw her way out?” Panicked, Elliot quickly rubbed his stomach. “Little one, I must insist you cease your attempted escape.” He placed both hands on his belly, rubbing it gently. “You’ll split my skin in half.” Alexander snorted, and Elliot looked up at him with narrowed eyes. “Now is not the time for laughter, Alexander, no matter how delightful you look while doing so.”

“I promise, everything is fine. She’s not trying to kick her way out of you. She’s just stretching her little arms and legs. It’s completely natural; in fact, it’s in your guidebook.”

Elliot cocked his head to the side? “You’ve read Mother’s Manual?” Alexander blushed because he read the first five chapters as Elliot napped the other day. It was fascinating information, but it held a misogynistic tone Alexander didn’t care for in the slightest.

“A few chapters,” he admitted. “I was curious. I hope you don’t mind.”

Elliot was still staring down at his belly, watching the foot roll beneath his skin. “I don’t mind.”

The boat slowly came to a stop, and the moment they docked, a pair of high heels clicked heavily behind them. Alexander looked over his shoulder to see his mother heading toward them with a warm smile and open arms. When she reached them, she wrapped the pair up in a relentless hug. Elliot made a choking sound, and when Alexander looked down at him, his entire body was tense. He knew Elliot wasn’t used to hugs, but he also didn’t want to tell his mother to let go, because then he would have to explain Elliot’s unfamiliarity with affection. She knew some of what Elliot had suffered from her phone calls with Alexander, but he didn’t want Elliot to have to rehash the details of his prolonged isolation.

“I’m so happy to see you again, Elliot,” she said, kissing his forehead. As she released the hold she had on him, she pressed her hand on Elliot’s stomach and beamed. “It suits you. You look more at peace than you ever have.” She pinched his cheek. “You’re positively glowing.”

Elliot shook his head. “My skin doesn’t glow, Ms. Twylah. I’m not a Lite-Brite. There isn’t much peace to be found here at the moment, either. I believe we’re in the middle of a medical emergency. The baby is trying to claw her way out of me as we speak.” He guided her hand to his belly. “See?”

“I already told you, she’s just stretching,” Alexander said.

“Yes, well, you’ve never gone through pregnancy. I’d like to seek a second opinion from someone who has.” Elliot’s nervous eyes found Twylah’s. “Can babies break through skin?”

She shook her head. “No, Elliot. And she wouldn’t want to if she could.” She placed her hand atop Elliot’s and guided it toward the baby’s foot. “She can hear you, you know. Do you ever talk to her? I used to sing to Lexy all the time. I think it helped our bond.”

“Should I have been doing that already? Mother’s manual didn’t mention anything about singing or speaking to her.” His jaw trembled. “What if I’ve already severed any bond we could have shared simply by remaining silent?”

Alexander opened his mouth to respond, but his mother cut him off. “Lexy says you’re about six months pregnant?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Then you still have plenty of time. Besides, I don’t think they can actually hear you until around six or seven months, anyway. She’s been listening to your heart, though.” Her smile reminded Alexander of the way she would look at him after a particularly brutal day at school. How she would flash her pearly whites, reassuring Alexander that the opinions of homophobic bullies did not define who he was. “Do you love her?”

Elliot nodded emphatically. “With my whole heart.” He sniffled. “I’m baking her from scratch. That’s what my mother used to tell me.”

Her hand soothingly caressed Elliot’s. “Then she knows, Elliot.” Leaning closer, she kissed Elliot on the forehead. “Lexy and I are going to get you through this pregnancy, and you’re going to have the happiest, healthiest family. I can feel it.”

Elliot looked like he wanted to cry. His hand moved on top of Alexander’s mother’s, and he held onto it like a touchstone. “Thank you. That really puts me—” Elliot yelped like a kicked dog, jolting back a step. He closed his eyes and breathed slowly, as if he’d just ran back and forth across the entire island. “I’m sorry. That was the strongest kick yet. I wasn’t expecting it.”

Alexander’s mother nodded. “She’s got a lion’s heart, I can tell.”

Elliot shook his head. “No, ma’am. Her heart is half-human, half-automaton. It says so in Mother’s guide.” He looked down, reaching out his hand for something that wasn’t there. Sucking in a sharp breath as he stared at the floor beside him. His eyes widened, and he jerked his head in Alexander’s direction. “My suitcase! I forgot my suitcase. The book was inside. Alexander, I was supposed to—”

Alexander smiled and reached for the tail of his shirt. As he lifted the fabric, Elliot stared at the book wedged between his hip and trousers. It was the only item he’d snuck off the cruise ship. Mrs. Peppercorn was supposed to gather the rest of their belongings once the ship docked, but Alexander thought Elliot might need his manual before then. “Here you go, baby. Safe and sound.”

“Y-you remembered to grab it for me?”

Alexander chewed his cheek. Was Elliot upset with him for going through his things? He hoped not. Alexander only wanted to help, but he hadn’t asked Elliot’s permission, so there was a good chance he’d crossed some line he hadn’t known was there. He hadn’t even thought of seeking Elliot’s permission, and it left him feeling guiltier than he ever had. He opened his mouth to apologize, but Elliot cut him off.

“No one has ever looked out for me the way you do. The cruise ship shopping spree. Cuddling me by the pool until I felt better. You even served me breakfast in bed.”

“It was just room service,” Alexander said sheepishly.

“You took the time out of your day to do something special for me.” He wrapped his hand around Alexander’s wrist. “Please don’t diminish yourself or your actions. I appreciate them both.” Elliot leaned forward and kissed Alexander sweetly, purring into his mouth like a kitten when Alexander stroked the side of his face.

When they pulled away, Alexander noticed his mother dabbing at her glossy eyes. “I didn’t think I’d ever get to see this, Lexy. You look so happy.”

Alexander blushed, unable to keep the smile off his face. “I am. I’ve never been happier.” He held the book out for Elliot. “Here you go.”

Elliot took the book and stared at it, then at Alexander. “Thank you. Thank you for everything.” He flipped through the opening pages, pausing at a page labeled Mother’s Mission Statement. “See, Ms. Twylah? There were no lion parts used in the making of our baby, only a bit of my source code and a sprinkle of Jared’s . . . well, you know.” He blushed furiously, immediately looking down.

She snorted a laugh. “Oh, I like you, Elliot. We’re going to be the best of friends. I can tell.”

“Until last week, I never had any friends at all. Now, they’re practically coming out my ears.” A grin worked its way onto his face. “I’m looking forward to getting to know you, Ms. Twylah.”

“Right back at you, sweetie.”

When they departed the ferry and made their way toward the crowd of Sugarplumians, Alexander watched as members of the small community welcomed Elliot with open arms.

“You’re one of us now,” Old man O’Connell promised. “Damn shame you had to miss the rest of your cruise, but you’re home now, so that’s got to count for something.”

“Thank you,” Elliot said, blushing.

Next was Myrtle McMillan, who was holding the sign apologizing for chasing Elliot with a rake. When they first met, Elliot mentioned someone chasing him off, but he didn’t know the details. Now, Alexander had to bite down the urge to issue her a notice of eviction from his island.

“I’m really sorry,” she said. “Your eyes were flashing up a storm, and I thought you were a demon coming to bring about the end times.”

Elliot shook his head. “I’m not a demon,” he said matter-of-factly. “I’m a bountiful beau. Apology accepted but not forgotten. Please show a bit more kindness in the future. It costs nothing.”

Mrs. McMillan nodded in agreement. “I will.”

As the rest of the crowd introduced themselves, Alexander spotted two familiar faces emerging from the thick morning fog engulfing the island. The closer they got, the more their colors showed.

“Baby,” Alexander whispered into Elliot’s ear, and when he looked into Alexander’s eyes, Elliot had an almost punch-drunk look of love on his face.

“I love when you call me that.”

Alexander placed his hand against the small of Elliot’s back. “I know. I like saying it.” He darted his eyes toward the two men headed in their direction. They looked happier than the last time they’d seen each other. When he last left the island, they were worried out of their mind about Ms. Broussard being hot on their trails. No matter how many times Alexander reminded the bonded beaus that Sugarplum Island was a safe place for them, they were terrified. Thankfully, his mother kept an eye on them in his absence.

Alexander waved at the men, welcoming them over. The moment Elliot caught sight of them, his eyes must have doubled in size. He gripped Alexander’s arm.

“Their eyes,” he whispered. “They’re like me?”

Alexander kissed his forehead. “Yeah. They’re just like you.” The men stopped in front of them, their gripped hands melded so tightly together that their knuckles had gone white. Nervous orange light flooded their eyes, but Alexander didn’t want them to be nervous. He hated seeing them scared. Ever since rescuing Duck from his abusive husband and hiding him and Goose away from the world on Sugarplum Island, Alexander tried his hardest to keep them both happy and healthy. The islanders had taken them under their wings in Alexander’s absence, but he still called to check on them almost every day. He motioned toward the man on the left. “Elliot, this is Duck.” He turned his attention to his former fiancé. “And this is Goose.”

Color sparkled around Elliot’s eyes. An endless flickering of pinks and purples. “Goose,” he said. “You were the bountiful beau he purchased first?”

Goose nodded. “Yeah.”

Elliot sidestepped in front of Alexander. “You cannot have him back. I don’t mean to be a spoilsport, but he’s mine now.” Alexander’s heart fluttered in his chest. He wanted to tell Elliot he had nothing to worry about, Goose and Alexander had never shared an intimate or romantic spark. Not even before Alexander knew about Goose’s feelings for Duck. For three months, Alexander tried to ignite a spark, but looking back, Goose always had one foot out the door. Duck was the center of Goose’s world. Of course, it didn’t take Alexander terribly long to figure out what they were up to. But Duck made Goose happy, and Goose’s happiness was what mattered most, Alexander supposed. When the truth came to light—the night Duck and his purchaser’s home went up in flames—Goose told Alexander once that when the pair were still in Louisiana, they inadvertently bonded to each other by giving one another nicknames. Alexander knew the naming process was meant to create a tether between suitor and beau, but Goose introduced himself as Gus that first day, so Alexander just went along with it, not knowing it would hinder their connection. He regretted nothing, as it led Goose to Duck, and Alexander to Elliot.

Goose cocked his head to the side. “We’ll see about that.” As Elliot ground his teeth, Alexander sighed, because he could see the flashing mischievous lights in Goose’s eyes.

“We most certainly will not,” Elliot warned.

Goose stepped closer and tapped the tip of Elliot’s nose. “I know, I’m sorry. I was only joking. You have nothing to worry about, Elliot. I’m quite happy with my Ducky-Duck.” He turned and held his hand out for Duck—always the more skittish of the pair—nervously approached, looking frightened.

“Hi,” Duck whispered, quickly shaking Elliot’s hand before ducking behind Goose nervously.

“You’ll have to forgive him,” Goose said. “He didn’t go to a good home at first, and he still struggles with it.” Goose turned and cupped Duck’s cheeks, gently kissing the man to reassure him.

Elliot nodded. “I didn’t go to a good home, either. Did your suitor harm you?”

Duck swallowed, and Alexander, ever protective, had to resist the urge to comfort him. “He harmed me often,” Duck admitted.

To Alexander and Goose’s surprise, Elliot wrapped his arms around Duck and pulled him close for a hug. “Mine, too,” Elliot whispered. “He was a horrible man with nothing but hate in his heart.”

“He was?” Duck asked, holding onto Elliot just as tightly.

“I was forced to power down several times a day. He often struck me.” When Elliot pulled away, he was giving Duck an empathetic look. Lifting his wrist, he showed Duck and Goose the stitches where Elliot cut out his tracking chip. “I heard a story about you once. About how you cut yourselves open just to set yourselves free.” His jaw trembled, and Alexander wanted to comfort him. “Thank you. I wouldn’t have ever . . .” He grabbed their hands and squeezed. “Thank you. Would you like to be friends? I haven’t had many, but I believe I’d like to be yours.”

Duck’s fearful expression faded. “You want to be my friend?”

Elliot nodded. “Very much so. There aren’t many men who know what we’ve gone through, and I think—” Elliot’s eyes bulged, and he quickly shook his head. “No, no, no, no, no.” His voice was full of panic as he lifted his arm, tracing the shape of a star against his skin. Lights flickered to life beneath the flesh, and Alexander noticed a red flashing light in the center of his small rectangular interface.

“What does the red light mean?” Alexander asked. When their eyes met, Elliot’s looked panicked. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry,” he said, but his voice was slow and muted. Alexander had never heard him sound so strained before. It was like it took every ounce of strength he had to get them out. “Alexander, I . . .” His eyes closed slowly, like a garage door coming down. To Alexander’s surprise, Goose quickly positioned himself behind Elliot. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

“He’s powering down,” Goose answered for him. “The red light means his power supply is almost out.”

Alexander’s chest ached. He swore Elliot would never have to power down again. He made the vow, and he meant it more than he’d ever meant anything else. Death. Elliot was dying in front of him. He reached into his pocket, pulling out the charging port he brought with him for the journey.

“We need to find somewhere to plug him in before—”

“Alexander,” Elliot whispered, his voice soft and slow, like a cassette tape on the last of its lifespan. “It’s already hap-hap . . . Happening.”

“Oh, Elliot. I didn’t know you needed rest. Baby, I’m so sorry.”

Elliot couldn’t respond, but when Alexander took his hand, Elliot’s grip was relentless. He made a lot of horrible sounds that sounded like he was in agony, each limb going limp, one at a time. Before the final breath left him, he opened his eyes and whispered, “I love . . .”