Page 35 of The Last Tiger

Seung

We’ve stopped to camp for the night. Above us, the stars emerge, the milky spread of constellations rising up over the forest, glowing softly.

I sit, holding my knees to my chest, feeling numb. Beside me, the tiger is curled up, her head tucked close to her tail, already asleep. Her rib cage rises and falls peacefully.

Jin surveys the landscape, making sure we’re hidden.

We’ve picked a spot in the woods tucked behind a huge, pale cliff that rises higher into the mountain.

We’re out of sight here, but the woods also extend in each direction around us, giving us plenty of room to run if need be. She nods to herself, satisfied.

I stare at the ground, an empty feeling in my chest. I shiver a little as the cool evening air kisses my skin.

“First time, right?” Jin says. “Don’t worry. It gets easier.”

I think I know what she’s referring to.

“I didn’t kill him,” I mutter.

“Okay.”

It was the sword. The sword that Jin was holding. That Officer Hiyoshi ran into. Because…

Because…

I watch the tiger. Her white-and-black fur is bristly and thick, like a mat of soft needles. Her claws have retracted back into her paws, so that only the tips are showing.

“Mine was hard on me too,” Jin says softly. “First one always is.” She grimaces, squinting off into the distance.

My head throbs by the temples. I grit my teeth, but it only makes the pain worse.

“Hey,” she says suddenly, pointing. “You see that?”

I follow her finger. It takes me a moment before I see what she’s indicating. There it is—a thin column of smoke, rising up over the forest. It’s dark but stands out clearly as a gray smudge against the ink-black sky.

“Looks like a campfire,” I remark. “Someone’s out there.”

“Or a signal fire,” Jin says. “I’d better go check it out. Just in case.”

“I’ll go with you.”

Jin shakes her head.

“Someone should stay here with the tiger.”

I nod, uneasy. I don’t like the idea of splitting up.

“Until you’ve mastered your powers, Seung, you’re just deadweight,” she adds. “No offense.”

“Thanks.”

“The Tiger spirit told me to make sure we get to the mountain unharmed. That means it’s my job to protect us. And your job to—”

“Sit here like a rock.” I finish her sentence.

She grins. “Exactly, you got it.”

I have to admit, she’s right. And after what just happened, I’m not sure I ever want to use my powers again.

“You think it’s Dragon soldiers out there?” I ask.

“Could be. I’m sure they’ve got the whole army crawling the countryside. They’ve probably found the dead officer by now.”

I bite my lip, feeling low. I can still feel the man’s heart twitching as the sword pierced his chest. The life bleeding out of him, into the dirt on the forest floor.

Jin stands, brushing the dirt and leaves off.

“I’ll be right back.”

I watch her disappear into the woods, then look at the tiger, and up to the thin column of smoke rising over the trees. As the minutes tick by, I rest with my arms clasped around my knees, my head tilted back toward the stars.

These constellations haven’t changed in the last year.

But everything else seems to have. For a moment, I’m swept back to the countless nights Eunji and I spent gazing up at the sky together, dreaming about a future that would never come.

I see a flower held between her uncalloused fingers as she kneels to inspect it, curious; her delighted laughter rings in my ears.

Now I watch the stars twinkle overhead, alone.

I wonder where she is tonight. Probably a country away. Strange to consider that there are people from our past still walking through this world, carrying memories of us. Memories that may be repainted or rusted over by the passage of time.

My chest burns.

Mine was hard on me too, Jin said. First one always is.

I wonder who she killed, why she did it.

Whether it was an accident, or something she planned.

I didn’t mean to kill Officer Hiyoshi. I didn’t mean to do…whatever it is that I did with my ki. But it’s undeniable. I was the source of the rage that sent him to his death.

I dig my nails into my arms, my stomach churning.

Dad’s tired face appears again in my mind, for the thousandth time. And for the thousandth time I wonder why he gave his own life to save the policeman who stole from us. I wonder if I could have saved him. If only I’d stopped that night to help Officer Hiyoshi in the woods.

Well, now, thanks to me…it really is as if Dad died for nothing.

I shudder, remembering the rage that consumed me earlier. It rose out of the depths of me, an outraged reaction not just to the officer’s words, but to the echo of those words, that same message I’d heard, spoken over and over again, my entire life.

That anger…it’s the most powerful thing I’ve ever felt.

Hours before, I was filled with it. Now I’m drained, empty, lost. Even now, I still feel it—that unbearable, agonizing hate—burning low like coals inside me.

I’m afraid to look at it.

I’m afraid of what might happen if I let it out again.

But I can’t keep it down. It’s a part of me, and I can’t dampen the dread telling me it will come out again, when I least expect it.

Whoosh!

I sit up, hearing something in the woods.

Whoosh!

There it is again.

The hair stands up on my skin as I hear an unearthly cackling sound.

It’s a high-pitched, chattering noise, gleeful, sadistic, echoing through the woods, sounding absolutely inhuman…

I sit up straight, my senses suddenly on alert. I squint—there’s something moving through the trees—

Then they pour out, coming out of the shadows. There’s eight or nine of them…squat, bizarre-looking creatures with purple limbs…Their faces are a terrifying, maroon red, their eyes empty white balls without any pupils.

They smile slowly as they fan out, surrounding me and the tiger, revealing dozens of razor-sharp teeth. The blood rushes out of my face.

Dokkaebi. I’ve forgotten from where, but the name of these monsters instantly enters my mind—recalled from an old story, maybe, or a childhood tale. Demented, man-eating goblins.

Just what I need right now, when I’m left defenseless and alone with the tiger.

The goblins only come up to my waist, but their thick, stumpy limbs and knife-sharp teeth look more than strong enough to do some damage.

Their empty eyeballs shine soullessly back at me, reflecting the moonlight.

The dokkaebi open their jaws wide, showing bright red tongues, releasing a series of pealing, high-pitched giggles.

One of the dokkaebi takes a step forward, its snout held up, sniffing the air.

It sucks in through its nose, drawing the scent of my fear deep into its nostrils.

Then it licks its lips, clearly whetting its appetite.

Its teeth shine like a necklace of blades as the smile spreads from ear to ear across its face.

Goose bumps spread over my skin. I stand up to my full height.

The goblins move forward, surrounding me and the tiger. One of them inches forward, clearly testing me. I brace myself. I have to do something to protect the tiger—

But all I can think about is the policeman, consumed with hatred.

Where’s Jin? I glance around at the woods, hoping against hope that she’ll come back.

Use your powers, Seung.

But I can’t. No, not again. Not after—

Then, blindingly fast, the eight or nine dokkaebi barrel toward me, their razor teeth parted, red tongues lolling from their lips—

I brace for the pain—

The tiger stands beside me, her fur bristling in the slight breeze. She rises to her full height, moving in front of me protectively, baring her teeth.

Rrrrrrrrrr…

The dokkaebi freeze, staring at the tiger as she guards me.

One of them nudges forward a few steps.

The tiger opens her jaws wide—

RWAAAAAAAR!

The goblins jump back. They cock their heads to the left, then to the right, their gleaming white eyeballs trained on the tiger.

She leaps forward, jaws snapping, claws flashing through the night.

With a chattering, yelping sound, the goblins turn and flee, their little feet shuffling at a blurring, unnatural speed.

They scamper off, bleeding into the woods and disappearing from sight.

I release a shallow breath as the tiger turns toward me.

“Thank you,” I whisper.

She blinks back at me.

My legs grow stiff and tired as I wait for Jin to return. I’m just starting to worry that something has happened to her when I hear the sound of approaching footsteps.

She’s out of breath, carrying one backpack slung over her shoulder and another in her arms. Jin tosses them both to the ground.

“Are you okay?” she says quickly. “I heard the tiger roar. I came as fast as I could.”

“We’re fine,” I tell her. “Well, we were almost eaten alive. But apart from that, totally fine.”

“Eaten alive…?” She raises an eyebrow at me.

“Dokkaebi. The Tiger spirit wasn’t kidding about the monsters.”

Jin curses under her breath. “It’s dangerous out here. We should sleep a few hours and get moving again.”

She unzips the backpack.

“Dinner,” she says curtly, tossing me something wrapped in paper. I unwrap it—it’s a soft bean bun. I take a bite and have to stifle the urge to cry with gratitude at the taste of sweet red bean paste.

“Who was that out there?” I ask her. “Where did you get this?”

“Just a bunch of merchants on their way back from Hannam City. I got enough supplies for the two of us and left them the rest.”

“How much was it?” My stomach tightens. How do I explain that I can’t possibly afford to pay her back for this?

But Jin only laughs and waves me away. “What do you think, Seung?”

The sweet, hearty red bean taste turns to ash in my mouth. “You stole them.”

“We’re on the run,” Jin says, chewing. “We can’t afford to have lofty principles here. How do you think I kept the Resistance fed and clothed all these years? Don’t worry, I only steal from rich people.”

We sit side by side, holding the stolen bean buns. My conscience wars with the emptiness in my stomach until I finally take another bite.