Page 18 of The Last Tiger

Eunji

“Another round of soju—to my daughter Eunji, the top scoring student in Kidoh!”

Father cheers and passes the bottle to Eunsoo. Tonight, even Mother takes part, filling her little glass cup with the clear spirit.

Moonhee circles the table, refilling the banchan, making sure to give me a warm smile of congratulations as she passes me. She adds extra soybeans to my plate. I lower my head with appreciation.

Seung is nowhere to be seen tonight. He hasn’t shown up to work in several weeks.

On Tuesday, Moonhee gave me word that Seung’s father passed away last month.

I know how much Seung looked up to his dad.

How close they were. I can’t imagine what it must’ve been like having to take the Exam while dealing with that loss.

I hadn’t even known what he was going through until after it was over.

My stomach twists at the memory of his name on that list of failed students.

For years, the one beacon of light shining over Adachi Academy was the prospect of escape: the possibility of being out of the house and away from my family for once. But I never truly looked forward to it until I thought Seung and I might go there together.

Now I’ll have to go without him.

“I spoke to Minister Kobayashi today—he sends his congratulations, Eunji,” Father says, reaching forward to grab a piece of pickled cabbage with his chopsticks. “And his family will be joining us for dinner tomorrow evening in order to finalize the terms of the engagement.”

I lower my spoon. The bitter feeling in my stomach turns black.

“I couldn’t be more thrilled,” Father continues, oblivious. “Initially, the union between our family and the Kobayashis’ was, I’ll admit, a reach even for us. But with that top Exam score, you’ll be the perfect bride for Kenzo. The dowry we’ll pay will most certainly be lower.”

Of course that’s what’s on Father’s mind right now—the dowry. Why should I be surprised?

“I have to admit,” Eunsoo echoes, “Eunji’s even outdone her sisters now. The first sanctioned marriage between an elite Dragon family and a yangban Tiger clan? This is historic. General Isao will be sure to smile upon us. This means a bright future for everyone, don’t you think?”

“No!” The word bursts out of my mouth before I can stop it.

The table falls silent. Eunsoo’s chopsticks are frozen halfway to his mouth. His radish plops back into his bowl with a small splash.

Father clears his throat. He sounds more surprised than angry. “What did you say, Eunji?”

Before anyone can say another word, I take off, running down the hall toward my room. I slide the door shut and crumple on my bed.

An hour passes before the door slides open. I hear the sound of footsteps as someone approaches and brace myself. But when I open my eyes, it isn’t Father who stands above me.

“Kenzo is a fine match,” Mother says softly, sitting down beside me. “As the empire strengthens their hold on the colonies, Eunji, it’s important that we do whatever we can to stay in their graces. Kenzo comes from a prominent family, as do you—the arrangement is a good one.”

“But,” I moan, “ I’ll be the one who has to marry him. I’ll be the one who has to spend the rest of my life with him, and—and—” I nearly gag at the thought of bearing Kenzo’s children.

“Yes,” Mother says curtly, “but in time you’ll grow to appreciate your relationship. Once, I had the same fear and hesitation when it came to marrying your father. But look how well it has served us in the end.”

Has it? I want to snap at her. Are you happy? I see you sitting there silently nodding at every dumb thing Father says. How well has this marriage served you ?

Hot liquid springs to my eyes. Through the tears, I can make out the distorted form of Mother’s body. It’s impossible to read her face.

“Eunji, there’s no way you’re going to be able to marry a servant. A cleaner no less.”

“What?”

“You think I don’t know?”

I can’t even attempt to disguise my shock.

“Eunji, do you really think that I wouldn’t notice my own daughter sneaking out every week?” Mother peers down at me, shaking her head.

“Does—”

“Father doesn’t know,” Mother adds before I can finish the question.

And then Mother says the last thing I would expect to come out of her mouth: “Eunji, I understand . I was young once too.”

“You…?” I ask, incredulous, shaking my head in disbelief.

She waves the question away. “Was there something between…you two? Is that why you don’t want to marry Kenzo?”

“No, Mother,” I insist. “He’s— We’re just friends—”

“You should know,” Mother says, her voice darkening, “even if you enjoy his company, that boy is not suitable for a daughter of our family line. I had Moonhee look into his background.”

“You did what ?”

“His family is extremely poor, and, as the eldest son, he will one day be responsible for taking care of them. He’ll struggle greatly in life.

I don’t want that for you.” Mother sighs.

“It’s difficult for you to see this now, Eunji, but if you choose poorly, you will learn the hard way: Love doesn’t put food on the table. ”

“I’m not in love with him, Mom,” I say. “Seung is just my friend—”

“Please, Eunji. Let it stay that way. I’m telling you this for your own good.”

Tap. Tap. Tap. A familiar sound at the window.

I can’t think of worse possible timing.

As I sneak a look at Mother, my heart pounds, aching to escape from my rib cage.

Her lips purse. Finally, she speaks:

“One last time, Eunji. Say goodbye.” Then she stands and walks out the door without another word.

I rush to the window and spring it open.

Sure enough, Seung is standing there, right outside. His shoulders are sagging, and his eyes are swollen and red. He looks like he’s had pretty much the worst week of his life. I heave a sigh at the sight of him, the corners of my own eyes stinging.

“Seung…”

Immediately I bound over the sill and drop onto the path, sweeping him into a tight hug.

Seung stiffens. I loosen my grip and step back.

“Seung, I’m so sor—”

“Don’t apologize.” He shakes his head. “You did the best you could. And you were an amazing tutor, Eunji. Really. I just”—Seung’s voice breaks, and he looks up into the starry sky, blinking rapidly—“had some bad luck, I guess.”

My chest tightens. “I heard about your dad…”

He sighs. Then a wavering smile appears on his face, but I know it’s forced. “Congratulations, by the way,” he whispers. “Top score, huh?”

I nod, lips tight.

“Well done. You know I wouldn’t expect anything less from Choi Eunji herself.”

“So what happens now?” I ask—regretting the question as soon as it leaves my lips. For some reason, I always assumed that he would pass. “Maybe there’s another way—maybe you could wait until next year, retake—”

“No, Eunji. What happens now is,” Seung interrupts me, his hands in the pockets of his tunic, “I keep my promise. You remember I told you I had one last surprise for you?”

“Seung.” I shake my head. “You don’t have to do that.”

“Hey,” he says, “we made a deal, didn’t we? I’m just upholding my end of the bargain.”

Seung spins around, beginning to walk down the path.

“Come on,” he says over his shoulder. “Let’s get outta here. One last time.”

“It’s so beautiful,” I murmur, looking at Seung with shining eyes. He grins back at me.

The old palace yard. It was quite a trek up and away from Kidoh, into the mountains, but it was worth every minute.

Dozens of towering, majestic palace buildings in this abandoned compound from the ancient past of the Tiger Kingdom sit nestled within the outer walls, the dark hoods of their tiled roofs slumbering in the night.

Here there are no lanterns, no candles, nothing to hold back the magic of the evening.

The whole place is quiet and still, as if the palace itself were asleep, frozen in time.

“I didn’t know that this place still existed,” I say, marveling.

“Yeah, it’s one of the only ones the Dragon Empire didn’t burn to the ground,” Seung says. “Maybe it was too far out of the way to be worth the trouble, or maybe they just never found it this deep in the valley.”

We stroll through the ancient palace yard, seeing only by the pale light of the moon and stars overhead.

Walking between the abandoned buildings, I spot an old, chipped statue of a ruler upon a throne that has been knocked over, dirt scattered over the surface.

Empress Myeong , the faded inscription reads.

A queen.

It’s a relic from the old days, when women ruled alongside—and sometimes in place of—men.

Seung swings left and takes me to the side of one of the old residence halls. He hoists himself up onto the platform surrounding the building and extends a hand down to me.

“Up this way. Use the statues for handholds.”

Along the length of the tiled roof are little molds in the shapes of animals—a serpent, a dragon, a tiger. A dog, a rabbit, an ox. I tentatively reach out and touch a dragon with my fingertips. It holds. I grab tight and heave myself up. Seung helps me onto the roof.

“Careful. Stay low. You don’t want to fall from here.”

I catch my breath and sit, taking in the view.

Wow.

Up here, we’re so high on the mountain that we can see the whole town below. The lamplights of Kidoh’s town square, nestled at the base of the valley, spread out like a warm, red flower into the night. I tilt my neck back, looking at the dark, mysterious mountain rising purple and serene behind us.

Suddenly I realize how little of this world I’ve seen. If Kidoh looks so different from here, only an hour’s hike away, what else lies out there in the world? On the other side of this mountain? On the other side of the country ?

“Thank you,” I say as we sit side by side, taking in the view.

“What for?” Seung extends his legs before flopping down onto his back, head resting on his palms. “For wasting all those hours of your life?”

“No,” I say gently, following his gaze up to the sky, stunning and dotted with twinkling stars. “For the view. For taking me here. And everywhere else we went.” The past tense hurts. “Also, none of those hours went to waste. You helped me study too. Plus, I had fun teaching you.”

Seung props himself up on an elbow. “You did?”

“Of course. It was fun to watch you progress. It sure beat sitting alone in my room doing nothing.”

“Surely you can’t have been doing nothing .”

“You’re right.” I chuckle wryly. “I have a lot of great memories watching dust collect and practicing my humble smile-and-blush combo.”

“I guess tutoring does sound fun in comparison to that.”

The humor doesn’t quite reach his eyes. I fall silent, not knowing what else to say.

For a moment, we say nothing at all as we sit on this palace rooftop, the cool spring air swirling around us.

“What are you thinking about?” I ask, breaking the silence at last.

“Nothing,” he replies, but I don’t believe him. “What are you thinking about?”

“Nothing,” I lie.

My mind whirls as I try, failing, to imagine a hopeful future.

Could it really be that Mother, too, once ran around in the dark of the night, dreaming of a better life for herself—only to grow up into the silent, respectable housewife that I know now?

It’s almost impossible for me to imagine.

Mother lives like a shadow behind Father and even Eunsoo, hardly making her existence felt in any room.

She never speaks her mind, in fact barely speaks at all.

Will I, too, have to accept that fate one day?

The wind whistles through the stone corridors of the open palace beneath us. A cloud passes briefly overhead, obscuring the moon. Then it moves on, and the night sky fills with light again.

“I guess I’m thinking about my family,” Seung murmurs finally. “About what we’re going to do. My dad was the main breadwinner. So I guess that role falls to me now.”

I can hear Mother’s words from earlier echoing in my mind. Love doesn’t put food on the table.

“I’ll have to keep working in the mines, in his place. So much for Adachi Academy…”

Seung rests his head in his hands.

“It’s funny,” he continues. “For a short, blissful eight months, I thought that it just might be possible to change my circumstances. To overcome the fate I was handed at birth and grab myself a new one. And, spirits , this is the really stupid part—I started to think here for a second that maybe if I made something of myself, someday, I could be enough for…”

He trails off.

“For…?” I can’t make myself finish the question.

For what?

Or…who?

Seung shakes his head, resigned.

“There are things that just aren’t meant to be, I guess. No matter how much we might”—his voice softens—“want them.”

I turn to the boy—a young man, of a world so different from mine—sitting beside me on this rooftop. I can see the stars overhead reflecting in his eyes. And something more, as he gazes at me. A deeper message, perhaps.

There’s a petal from a mugunghwa flower entangled in his hair. It dances back and forth in the wind.

“Seung…,” I start.

“Yeah?”

“You have something on your head.” I reach forward and brush the pink flower away from his hair. It flutters downward, spiraling to the earth.

As I start to bring my arm back, Seung suddenly lifts his own, taking my hand in his. His fingers curl around mine, our two hands suspended in the space between us, our eyes locked. I glance down at his lips. They look so soft, parted just slightly.

And then I find myself leaning forward.