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Izzy

This is why you don’t rush childhood, why kids should be allowed to hold on to their precious belief that the world is full of magic.

Let’s go fly a kite…

The song lingers in my head, even though I know better. Fairy tales are the product of imagination. The real world is full of monsters wearing the masks of our friends and neighbors, hiding lies, secrets, and betrayals that go back generations.

I came to Lake Timmeny hoping to solve the cold cases and break the cycle of anxiety for my mom and myself. Mom could stop worrying about everything in life, and I would stop acting first and thinking later.

But maybe I wasn’t being impulsive when I confronted David.

Perhaps because I had finally learned the truth, I was facing my fears rather than simply reacting to them.

By coming here, I’ve learned there’s a difference between trusting my inner wisdom and simply responding mindlessly to stressful situations.

I feel a deeper sense of freedom, like I achieved some kind of victory.

I’m not sure how it will all play out, but I know I’ve set some wrongs to right.

Now, the healing can begin. I may always be Frizzy Izzy, the girl who doesn’t think things through, but I love her regardless, and I’m damn proud of the woman she’s become.

But what about Erika? What’s her story? Why did a loving, caring mother and friend kill my aunt? I have to know.

More police have arrived. I’m told this is a local matter, and the FBI is clearing out. David is in the back of a cop car. Good. I hope he never walks free again.

Lucas is talking to his parents, but even from a distance, I can tell it’s a painful conversation.

He looks unmoored, like a boat adrift on the ocean.

Erika reaches out to hug him, but he pulls away.

It saddens me, regardless of what she’s done.

While I still don’t have all the facts, my instincts tell me that Erika and Rick were being truthful.

They didn’t mean to hurt Susie. For what it’s worth, it wasn’t intentional.

Taylor beckons Lucas away and he can’t leave fast enough. I’ve been watching her as well. She’s been talking with her dad, overwrought with emotion. I’m sure she’s told him everything, and now I wonder if Lucas is about to get the second biggest shock of his young life.

Nearby, Jimmy T and his two thugs are busy with Detective Baker, which gives me an opportunity to finally confront Erika.

I don’t have to go alone. Julia joins me in silent understanding, and together, we approach Rick and Erika, huddled by an oak tree. Every muscle in my body tightens. A wool blanket draped across Erika’s shoulders keeps her warm in the night’s chill, but I need something to cool me down.

“Why?” I say to her, my voice breaking. “Why did you do it?”

Erika shuts her eyes, “Izzy… I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now.”

“I’ll help you,” I say. “I’m feeling fucking angry and hurt, and very, very confused.” My entire body, my whole being, is burning with a mix of rage, adrenaline, and heartache.

Julia steps forward. “Erika, before Jimmy barged in, you said, ‘We only meant to scare her.’ What does that mean?”

Erika looks at Rick, who walks toward the shoreline, motioning for us to follow. We fall into step behind him.

There are so many police vehicles, fire trucks, and ambulances parked out front that night has become day. But Rick has brought us to a secluded spot at the water’s edge that’s covered in near darkness. It’s the perfect place for a private conversation.

“I don’t expect you to forgive us, but let me explain.

” Erika’s voice is soft and heartfelt. “Rick and I planned it together. We had to do something to make Susie stop, for her own safety. It all started when David wanted Susie to drop the rape charges. He told her that he was connected to the Irish Mob and that it made him untouchable. He even said that he had a couple cops in his back pocket because of his connections.”

David. Why does it always come back to him?

“But he didn’t know that Susie had found evidence—a letter written by Anna Olsen—that basically foretold her death and pointed the blame at a mobster living at the lake.”

“I know about that letter,” I say.

Erika looks surprised but continues. “Your aunt knew that David worked for my father, which meant his mobster connection had to be Cormac—the same man, she deduced, who got Anna pregnant and then silenced her.”

I don’t say anything. Erika keeps talking.

“Susie came to me and told me about the letter, what David did to her, how my father and the Mob were protecting him, and her plan to expose my father—go to the FBI if she had to—unless I could convince Cormac to stop shielding David. For her, it wasn’t so much about Cormac and Anna; that was in the past—she wanted David to face the consequences of his actions, and she would threaten Cormac to see that justice was served.

I knew all about my father’s so-called business .

More importantly, I knew he was capable of extreme violence.

I believed the letter was real and that my father had murdered Anna Olsen to protect his life and guard his secrets.

And I knew he’d do the same to Susie in a heartbeat. ”

I hear a splash nearby, a fish jumping to catch a meal.

It’s interesting how other species kill only to survive, but not us humans.

No, we find all kinds of reasons to take a life that have nothing to do with biology.

Greed. Ego. Hatred. Jealousy. The list goes on.

If only we were as simple as a hungry fish—satisfied after a meal, and then back to living in peace and harmony with its environment.

Erika pulls the blanket tighter, her body quivering like the ripples in the water.

“Your aunt didn’t understand the danger she was putting herself in.

I didn’t have any power over my dad. If he felt threatened, he would react.

My father was with the Westies, one of the most violent gangs ever: kill first, ask questions never.

That was how they operated. I tried to talk Susie out of it, but she wouldn’t listen to reason.

So, I came up with a plan to scare her straight. ”

I piece it together in my mind. It was as if I could stand in Susie’s shoes and feel what it was like to be a young woman full of grief and rage, suffering from a profound injustice.

All it took was a chance yard sale purchase of a decorative box with a secret compartment to change her fate.

At some point, Susie took an old Polaroid of her and David, blacked out his face in anger, and placed that picture in the box along with the letter, cementing a bond between two strangers, two victims, the first two disappearances at Lake Timmeny.

It made perfect sense why my aunt Susie approached Erika and not the police with what she knew. Obviously she couldn’t trust the local authorities, so she went to her next best option—a fellow lake kid who also happened to be the daughter of the man she could bring down.

“Rick and I had gotten together that summer,” Erika continued. “I needed someone’s help, and I felt like I could confide in him. I told him about my dad and he agreed something had to be done.

“We arranged to meet Susie at the Shack so we could talk it out. When she got there, I begged her to give me the letter. I told her she was putting herself in grave danger by threatening to expose someone as powerful as my dad. When Susie wouldn’t comply, I took out the gun.

It was Rick’s idea to use it as a last resort.

“We planned it all carefully, including the pistol I would take from my father’s collection.

I needed something small and lightweight that I could conceal.

The gun wasn’t loaded—we had checked and made sure.

I swear to you, we only meant to scare her, nothing more.

The plan was that I would pull the trigger only if Susie refused to give me the letter.

We figured one moment of true terror would convince her to back down, that she would realize the next time it would be Cormac Gallagher confronting her, and the shot would be for real.

“Susie wouldn’t hand over the letter, and I did as we had planned.

I fired. The gun wasn’t loaded. We triple-checked the magazine—it was empty.

But we never checked the chamber—didn’t think of it—and that’s where the bullet that killed Susie must have been.

It hit her in the chest. We tried to save her, but we didn’t know how, and she died so quickly. ”

Erika’s composure fractures as tears slip from her swollen eyes. Even in the low light, I can tell her complexion is gray. Rick’s isn’t much better. They are reliving the worst moment of their lives, and I’m convinced that Erika’s sorrow and regret—Rick’s too—are genuine.

“We buried her on Rick’s property—his family’s hunting grounds would be safe, or so we thought.

We cleaned up as much evidence as we could, removed all the blood from the scene, disposed of our clothes.

Susie vanished, and the investigation into her disappearance went nowhere.

We were in the clear. All we had to deal with was our guilt, and the sick feeling that has followed us for thirty years.

“We thought that was the end of it. But then, Rick’s family sold the land, without telling us. We got nervous, fearing someone would find Susie’s remains. But we couldn’t remember exactly where we had buried her. That night we’d been in a fog. We were both in shock, so we never marked the spot.

“Then our worst nightmare came true. Someone else unearthed our terrible secret. I tried not to panic, but we were so scared. We never did find the bullet that killed her. We assumed it was lodged in her body. But I knew the police wouldn’t be able to trace a bullet back to us without the weapon. So, we felt relatively safe.