Page 14 of The Heart of a Capricorn (BLP Signs of Love #19)

The heaviness I felt in my chest when I woke up told me what day it was without even needing to look at the calendar.

I tried to push the thought out of my mind, but it didn’t work.

I didn’t have the energy to get out of bed, so I grabbed my puzzle book from the bedside table to distract myself.

That didn’t help either. It was the same thing every year, and I wondered when the sadness would end.

It was my ex’s birthday. It was also the same day I got the call that he had died.

The day would forever be etched in my mind. I was at work when my phone rang with an unfamiliar number.

“Hello, is this Lyric?” the person asked in between sniffles.

I was at my desk, and the tone of the woman’s voice gave me pause.

“Yes, this is she.”

“I’m sorry to be calling you like this, but it’s about Brice.”

My heart dropped to my stomach when she said his name. He and I weren’t together, so I wondered why she called me. I hoped she wasn’t telling me she was pregnant or something by him, because it wasn’t my business. It would have hurt me, but there wouldn’t have been anything I could do about it.

I sat up in my chair. “What about him?” I tried to keep the attitude out of my tone because I could hear that she was crying.

She sniffed a couple of times. “This is his cousin, Shamika. He—he.” Her voice broke, and I heard her sniffle again.

I tried not to rush her because, clearly, something was wrong, but my patience quickly ran thin.

“He was in a small plane crash, and he died.” As soon as the last word left her mouth, she sobbed loudly in my ear.

My body froze as tears sprang to my eyes and dropped on my desk. It felt like my tongue was stuck to the roof of my mouth because I couldn’t open it.

“What? What do you mean? Where is he?”

“Him and a group of his friends rented a small plane to celebrate his birthday, and something happened with the plane. It went down, and he died.” She wailed.

I never met Shamika, but I knew that was Brice’s favorite cousin. She lived in Tennessee, so they didn’t see each other that often, but I knew he talked to her all the time.

I covered my face with my hand and cried. We sat in silence on the phone for a minute before either of us spoke.

“When did this happen?” I asked. It wouldn’t make a difference, but I still wanted to know. I wanted to see if I would be able to see him one last time.

“It happened late last night. We are still at the hospital. He held on for a while, but eventually, he succumbed to his injuries. I know how important you are to my cousin. You can come see him if you want.”

Before she could finish her sentence, I had my stuff gathered and was already heading out the door.

The sound of my phone pinging pulled me out of that conversation. I looked at the phone, and it was a reminder that it was Brice’s birthday. I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t taken it out of my calendar. I felt like taking it out would be like erasing Brice from my life, and I couldn’t bear that.

I threw the phone on the other side of the bed, then I grabbed the pillow next to me and held it over my face.

“Ahh!” I screamed multiple times into the pillow.

When I felt like I had gotten my feelings out, I picked up the phone and called Brice’s mom.

The phone rang a few times before she finally picked up.

“Hello.”

I could tell by her tone she was about to be on some bullshit.

“Hey, Ms. Anita. I called to check on you.”

She sucked her teeth. “I don’t know what the hell for. It’s not like you give a fuck about me or anybody else in this family.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose and counted to five. My eyes stung from the tears that had gathered in them.

“Ms. Anita. I’m not sure why you think that. I’ve been nothing but nice to your family, even when everyone wasn’t nice to me.”

There were some people in Brice’s family who I didn’t get along with, because they assumed that I thought I was better than them.

I was just more reserved around people I didn’t know, so when I first met them, I didn’t say much.

Eventually, I loosened up and became friends with some of them, but the others never learned to like me.

They would say slick stuff whenever I came around.

I even got into a fight with one of his sisters.

I heard her click her teeth again. “Well, it’s not like they don’t have a reason not to like you. We know you had money left from that fund you started for him, and ain’t gave us a single dime. Not even me, and I’m his mother.”

I closed my eyes and sucked in all the air that my lungs could hold, then let it out. I knew how hard this day was for her, so I tried not to get smart with her, but she made it difficult.

When I found out they had trouble getting the money for the extravagant funeral they wanted to have for Brice, I started a fund to pay for it.

There was some money left over, but it wasn’t a lot, so I gave myself the rest of it.

I considered it payment for taking care of everything, because they all couldn’t get along long enough to finalize the details.

“Ms. Anita, I’m not trying to go there with you.”

“Girl, say what you have to say,” she snapped.

My parents taught me to respect my elders.

I had to remind myself of my upbringing. My mother would pop me in my mouth if I got smart with this lady.

“Look, Ms. Anita. I did everything I could for your son and your family, and y’all treated me like crap. Wouldn’t even let me in the funeral that I planned and paid for. At least y’all tried to, anyway.”

I’d arrived at the funeral home, and two of Brice’s cousins were at the door and tried to deny me entry.

I couldn’t believe it. I had done nothing but be nice to them people, and they acted like I was some random person off the street.

It was I who made sure he had the white casket with the horse and the other shit they wanted.

I even ensured he had on the flyest outfit I could find for him.

Everything I could do for them, I did, and they acted like I couldn’t be there because of the money.

Eventually, one of the family members that I did get along with came to the front and walked me in. By that time, I was over it. I paid my respects, said my goodbyes, and walked out of that church with my head held high.

A week later, I ran into Brice’s grandfather, and he apologized for his trifling family, but I didn’t need it. I was done with that family, and that was okay with me.

I knew how much Brice’s mom meant to him, and that was why I reached out, but I had to protect my peace. She was a disruption to it, so this would be my last time calling her.

She huffed and puffed but didn’t say anything else, so I did.

“You take care, Ms. Anita.” I hung up the phone, blocked, and deleted her number.

There was nothing else for us to talk about. I was glad I never had to deal with her.

The whole ordeal made me sad and angry. I swiped away the tears that had fallen.

It was time to officially close that chapter of my life.

I would never forget Brice, but I knew he wouldn’t want me to deal with anybody who treated me wrong, even if it was his mom.

It was crazy because she wasn’t bad while we were together, but I guess she pretended to like me because of her son.

I allowed myself a good cry before I climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom.

I took a shower and pulled my hair up in a messy bun.

I tossed on some leggings and a T-shirt.

There was only one person I wanted to see, and he was only a couple of floors away.

I looked over my appearance, and even though my eyes and face were puffy, I still looked good.

It had been a couple of days since I saw Chauncey, and I realized I missed him. I prayed he was in his room while I grabbed the key and my phone.

I slid my feet into a pair of slides and headed out. I tried to keep my tears at bay as I rode the elevator up, but it was impossible. I’d gotten myself together by the time the doors opened and walked down the hall to Chauncey’s room.

“Lyric. Are you okay?” Chauncey asked as soon as his door opened.

Without giving me a chance to respond, he pulled me into his arms.

Being in Chauncey’s arms gave me the safety and comfort I needed. Just inhaling his scent slowly mended the broken pieces of my heart.