Page 36 of The Haunting of William Thorn

Edward replied with the release of a heavy breath. He didn’t ask more questions. He didn’t even press for more information. Not that he needed to, because that faucet of William’s heart had opened, and there was no shutting it now.

A faucet had been opened, and the agony came rushing out.

“I found out Archie was cheating on me,” William continued.

“The man who I’d planned to spend the rest of my life with, the man who made me feel so safe, so loved that I never would imagine it possible that he could do something so unkind to me.

And do you know what the worst part is? Finding out the man you gave your heart to didn’t treat it with the respect it deserved.

And he’ll never get the chance to explain himself.

To do so much as apologise. Maybe he wouldn’t have done that anyway, or maybe he would have.

But I took that chance from him. I took his future from him the moment I kicked him out of the house.

I stood and watched from our balcony as the rain fell hard and Archie cycled away.

Forever. All I could think about was where he was going to go.

Was it straight into the arms of the other man, or maybe to his family?

Either way, that was another question that I’d never get answers to. Because the car came out and hit him.”

“It isn’t your fault,” Edward said, using the same words the therapists, doctors, and specialists all used. He clasped firm but caring hands on either side of William’s face, holding him in place. “It. Isn’t. Your. Fault.”

Edward had tears in his eyes, clinging to those beautifully dark lashes, making the brown of his stare glisten like raw gems.

“And yet, if I hadn’t kicked him out, he wouldn’t be dead.

Car or not. He would still be alive. Do you really think you have the answers to make me feel better?

Because no one else has this far. Imagine how I felt when I sat with Archie’s parents as they screamed beside his dead body, asking why, why, why…

Then I answered them. Because I couldn’t hear them ask that question anymore, I’ll never forget the silence that followed when I explained why their precious son was on the bike in the first place.

How I put him there because I was angry. ”

“Heartbroken,” Edward said. “You were acting from a place of heartbreak, that was all.”

“No, Edward. You’re wrong. Because what I felt in that moment was nothing compared to watching Archie’s body bounce across the wet road.

It was nothing compared to finding him, broken and bleeding, on the street.

That was heartbreak. What I’d experienced in the moments before was anger. I acted from a place of selfishness.”

“Yes, you kicked him out, but if he was honest with you then he may never have needed to get on that bike.”

“It’s easier for you to say,” William replied, tears cutting rivers down his face. “I didn’t really give him the chance to be honest. Something else I took away from him.”

“It will always be easier for anyone else to say the truth and harder for you to believe it. Life is unfair, William. It’s horrible and mean, uncaring and evil. But that’s only one side to the coin. Life can also be beautiful, if only you look hard enough.”

“When?” William sobbed, more tears falling, more pain gripping his entire being. “When will I ever see past this dark clouds?”

“When you give yourself the chance.”

William couldn’t help but laugh. It came out misplaced and ugly, but still, he couldn’t stop it. “You say that after everything that’s happened since I’ve been here. I’ve left one hell for another. More proof that I don’t deserve any of what you’ve just said.”

“Then stop running and face what’s waiting before you,” Edward said. “It’s your only option. The first step to truly healing.”

His words were like a slap to the face. The sting far outweighed the guilt William had felt waking up in the arms of another man – a man who wasn’t Archie. All this because he allowed himself to feel comfortable and safe in the arms of another when he knew that only he could look after himself.

“I’m not running.”

“No?”

“ No .”

“Then what do you call this?” Edward gestured to the house around him. “If planning to move into Hanbury Manor wasn’t a step in running from the past, what is it?”

“Running towards the chance of a fresh start,” William answered and meant it. “A start Archie wanted for us.”

Truth tasted sweet when William didn’t except it. Because there was another reason to come to such a secluded space. A place in which he could sit with himself, his thoughts, and decide if he actually wanted to leave it again.

In that moment, starring into the eyes of a man he had come to trust, he figured out that the option of hurting himself, ending himself, was not how this story would end.

“Feels good, saying that aloud, doesn’t it?” Edward paused, drinking in the answer, chewing on the words to see if he believed them. “And do you know what, I believe you. I believe that’s what you want, because you believe it.”

“After all of that?” William barked. “You just told me I was running, and now you believe me?”

“You just need a little push to address the truth that you’ve been so scared to face.”

“How do you think you know me so well after a couple of days?” William asked, voice breaking as he looked at Edward through wet lashes.

Edward shrugged. “Call it intuition. You’re like a book, William Thorn. A good one at that. I think you’re just getting past the middle now, and with a little encouragement, you can decide your ending.”

“Is that so?” William asked, his head tilting to the side to further prove he didn’t believe the words that just came out of Edward’s mouth.

“You came to Hanbury Manor for a fresh start. You came here hoping to leave your past behind and move on, which I think is a well-justified action. Dramatic but justified. But that means you need to do that. Leave it behind, truly. Otherwise, you are just wasting your own time. And I think you deserve more than that.”

“Respectfully, you don’t know me as well as you think you do.”

Because I came here to end it. To end me . In the peace, close to Archie.

“ Respectfully , I’m actually rather enjoying getting to know you, regardless of the circumstance.

So, stop pushing me away. I promise it’s easier to go with the tide of life than fight against it.

” Edward took his thumb and brushed the tears from William’s face.

He took care with his actions, moving from one eye to the other, stopping only when his cheeks were dry.

“Now, there’s no better distraction from one’s pain than helping someone else through theirs. ”

“Whose?” William twitched his nose, sniffling to himself. “Who do we help?”

Once again, Edward looked up to the manor around him, his brows lifting into his hairline, smothering his forehead in established wrinkles. “Whatever spirit is haunting these halls, that’s who.”

“Not this again.”

Edward helped William from the floor. Even when they stood, he didn’t take his hand out of William’s.

“Yes, this again. After everything that has happened, do you want to pretend that nothing sinister is going on here? Or shall we solve the riddle and get our answers so you can finally move on with the life you wanted?”

“You make the impossible sound so simple.”

“Anything is possible when you simply try.’ Edward leaned on his hip, flashing an award-winning smile that worked through the cracks of William’s shields. Not that many were left remaining.

“Go on then, Ghostbuster. How do we do… whatever this is?”

“I’m so glad you asked because I’m going to need your permission for what is going to happen next.”

“Why does that sound ominous?”

“That’s exactly what it is.”

“Spit it out, Edward.”

Edward’s grin turned into a smirk that lit a fire in William’s belly… and below. “Not that I could ever turn down the chance to spit.”

“You’re gross.”

“And you’re smiling. I stand the victor.”

William hadn’t noticed it until Edward pointed the obvious out. But the lift of a hand did, in fact, find a subtle smile tugging up at the corners of his lips. “Congratulations, you made me smile with a cheap sex joke. Want a prize?”

“Maybe later. After you permit me to vandalise your very lovely, extremely welcoming new home.”

“What are you on about?”

Edward looked skyward as if his eyes could see through the floors above him. “I think it’s time we break down that attic door, don’t you? We either find some answers on the other side, or we don’t.”

“And if we don’t?” William asked,

He’d heard something from beyond the closed door more than once. And William knew, deep down, that answers always waited behind locked doors.

Edward leaned in so close that William could make out that his eyes weren’t brown but a perfect blend of hazel and honey.

“If I can make you smile with a crude joke, just imagine how good you’ll feel after some fury-therapy.

Nothing beats sadness better than taking that emotion and using it to destroy something. ”

“Why destroy a door when you are just such a better option to bang ,” William quipped, fist lifted in jest.

“One cheap sex joke for another, I’m impressed.” Edward drew back, and William found himself leaning in. “Although surely you know I’m not the taker, but the giver.”

“Oh Jesus. A gay joke, now?”

“That’s up for your interpretation.” Edward hooked his arm around William’s back and guided him towards the stairs. “Come on, let’s go evict some ghosts, shall we.”