Page 84 of The Guilty Girl

‘Never.’

‘What?’

‘You never show me you care.’ Rose sulked and coughed. Lottie noticed tears gathering in her eyes. ‘Okay, have it your way. One night. That’s all. I’m not an invalid.’ She made to stand, wobbled beneath the blanket then sat down again. ‘Maybe you could help me get my coat on.’

Lottie hated to admit it, but she’d been half hoping Rose would refuse to leave. I’m going straight to hell, she thought as she tugged the coat around her mother’s bony shoulders, then wondered what, if anything, there was at home to cook for dinner.

And she still had to talk to Sean.

Why was her life so bloody complicated?

Never a dull moment.

After Sean had brought down blankets and pillows from upstairs to the cold sitting room, Lottie stripped her own bed and dressed it with fresh sheets. She hadn’t got around to furnishing a guest bedroom. She could only find one clean duvet cover and that wasn’t even ironed. In her mind, she heard Rose’s rebuke about her lack of household skills.

‘Tough,’ she muttered, struggling to get the cover over the unwieldy king-size duvet. ‘It’s my house and I don’t have to iron if I don’t want to.’

‘It’s fine, Lottie.’

She froze. She hadn’t heard her mother come up the stairs.

‘I’m tired,’ Rose said. ‘I can sleep on the couch rather than uprooting you.’ She suddenly looked old and frail.

‘I brought your nightdress. Are you okay to put it on … to undress yourself?’

‘Stop fussing.’ Rose sat on top of the half-covered duvet. ‘I should have stayed in my own house.’

Lottie hadn’t the heart to ask her mother to move so that she could close the final buttons on the duvet cover. ‘Get yourself ready for bed and I’ll bring up some food when it’s cooked.’

Rose took the nightdress from her hastily packed bag. ‘This is not the right one.’

Of course it’s not. Lottie groaned silently. ‘It’ll do for tonight. I’ll get more of your clothes in the morning. Are you okay up here on your own while I put on the dinner?’

‘I’ll be back at home tomorrow, so there’s no need to fuss. And I’m not hungry. Didn’t I tell you I’d had my dinner?’

‘Please don’t make this more difficult than it is. I’m trying to help you.’ Lottie felt close to tears. Maybe it was Lucy’s murder, or the fact that Boyd was away, or that she still had to have it out with Sean, not to mention McKeown with his smug grin after he’d landed her in it with the super. Or maybe, just maybe, it was because she’d never seen her mother look so vulnerable.

‘I’m sorry,’ Rose said quietly. ‘I know I’m not the easiest person to like, and by God you have reason more than most to dislike me, but—’

‘I don’t dislike you. For God’s sake—’

‘Let me finish what I’m saying. I appreciate you looking after me tonight. But I’m going home tomorrow. I’ve never been a burden on you, and I’m not about to start. I’ve lived a lot of my life alone and I think I’m qualified to know that I can still manage.’

‘Not when you’re ill, though.’

‘Go and cook that dinner. We can argue about it later. Did you bring a nightdress for me? I told you to pack one.’

Lottie sighed as she stared at her mother holding the nightdress, a vacant look in her eyes.

39

Colette Ennis loved bringing her dog for a walk in the evening, even after rain.

With the black Labrador straining on his leash, she jogged along the canal towpath. The evenings were long and there had been a hint of summer in the air earlier, but it wasn’t quite there yet. She eyed the black clouds gliding across the sky, thinking it looked like a stealthy cat about to pounce on a mouse. The mouse being the dipping sun. She undid the leash to let Jasper run freely.

Just before she reached Piper’s Lane, she passed a couple of disappointed fishermen packing up their kitbags. She ran on, but slowed for a moment to gaze at the small bronze famine monument depicting a child’s shoes. She’d passed them regularly but had never looked properly. How sad, she thought, and quickened her steps again.

The canal was a muddy brown. The earlier shower had caused the silt to rise. She didn’t think the fishermen had caught anything, and if they had, the fish were most likely already dead. The canal looked like a watery grave. That thought caused her to shiver.