Page 42 of The Frog Prince (The GriMM Tales #6)

Nineteen

Alwin

H e woke up to soft hands caressing his head and a strong and steady thrum underneath his cheek. Warmth encircled him, keeping reality at bay.

He felt at peace. Whole in a way he hadn’t in a long while.

“Welcome back, my prince,” he heard that beloved voice whisper gently, and he pried his eyes open.

Soft light met him, and he gasped when he realized the colors looked duller than before, like there were fewer of them. They still shone and glimmered. They were still beautiful. But different than they had been before.

“Was it…was it real?” he asked, realizing his voice, while raspy and deeper than usual, wasn’t as croaky. It wasn’t scratching his throat as it fought to come out. It slid from between his lips without much effort.

“Depends what you mean,” Otto said, brushing a thumb under Alwin’s eye. “You have been having some very vivid dreams over the past few days, I think. How are you feeling?”

Alwin took stock of his body slowly. There was still pain lingering and a tightness around his chest, but it was dulled. “You’re excellent at your craft, as always.”

Otto smiled. “Thank you, though I do not relish the practice of healing your hurts. In the future you should walk around entirely wrapped in wool.”

“Unsightly.”

“You could start a new trend at court.”

The mention of court made Alwin’s breath catch.

“Am I really…back?” he asked, fearing the answer. Scared of getting his hopes up and having them crushed and ruined.

He felt Otto shift beneath him, and then he was being helped to sit up. Face to face with his sunshine. His golden healer. His love.

“Before I show you,” Otto said, cupping Alwin’s cheeks in his hands and tipping his head back so they were looking into each other’s eyes, “I need you to listen to me.”

Alwin just nodded, unable to speak when Otto’s hands felt so warm on his skin, when they were strong and comforting and grounding in the face of so much turmoil.

“I love you,” Otto said, “in a way I have never loved anyone else before. I don’t think I knew what love felt like until you came along.

You make my days brighter, you make me brave, you make me reach for the stars because I feel safe knowing you’ll catch me if I fall.

You are mine. My future, my prince, my heart. ”

Alwin felt his bottom lip quiver, his heart hammering in his chest. He closed his eyes and nuzzled Otto’s hand, his shoulders pulled high around his ears.

“I love you too,” he whispered. “But you are scaring me.”

“There is nothing to be scared of.” Otto released Alwin’s face and wrapped his fingers around Alwin’s.

Still green, still long and spindly, and still only four.

It made him swallow heavily. He knew. He knew he had given up parts of his humanity along the way. He knew he’d never be able to get them back because it meant the people he cared for were happy and whole.

But it hurt to see. And it hurt to accept. He’d never be himself again.

Otto stood up and pulled him to his feet, walking slowly backward, never breaking eye contact with Alwin, never letting go of his hand.

Alwin allowed himself to be led, trusting Otto with everything he was.

They reached the edge of the caved-in wall, and he could hear the water of his pond sloshing softly. The familiar sound echoed in Alwin’s head.

Would it be so bad?

Would it be that horrible if nothing had changed? If he were still the Frog Prince, but now with his love by his side? He could learn to be happy, he thought. He could make peace with being the monster if he was loved.

Otto’s sunshine would chase Alwin’s shadows away.

Otto led him to the edge of the water and knelt down, pulling Alwin in front of him to face the water.

“You can look,” he said and Alwin glanced down at the dark surface of the pond, curiosity and terror battling for control of his body.

He gripped the edge of the wall with his long fingers and rocked back and forth, seeing the top of his head reflected in the water.

Messy black hair, thick and glossy and achingly familiar.

He gasped and pushed himself farther forward. His forehead came into view, pale pink, smooth and so human he nearly choked.

A pair of thick eyebrows appeared next. Then two emerald-green eyes. Close together, more sunken than he had seen them in close to a decade. Not bulging, but surrounded by a fan of dark lashes.

Prince Adalwin’s famous green eyes.

He choked on a sob, and in a rush of bravery he leaned over the pond to look at his entire face.

He shouldn’t have.

He should have taken it slowly.

Because as human as the upper part of his face was, the Frog Prince was still there.

In the pale green marks along the sides of his nose and the apples of his cheeks.

His lips were human again, full and narrow and chapped from years of being stretched into a frog-like grimace.

He had ears again, but the human pink of his cheeks bled into the green of the shell of his ear, spreading down over his neck, chest, and arms.

He had a human build again. His chest was narrower, rib cage feeling stronger. His arms were wider, muscles back where they were supposed to be, wrapping around fragile bones and stretching out his skin.

So much of his old self was back. And so much was lost forever.

He felt a dark cloud settle over him as he tried to wrap his head around this. His hands gripped the edge of the wall so hard he felt the cracks in his bones. He was shaking, he knew. He could feel it.

“I suppose this is as good as it will get,” he choked out. He knew he was supposed to be grateful, but it felt so unfair. He had lost so much.

He felt movement behind him and then another head appeared in the reflection next to his own.

Golden hair against pitch black. Sunshine against midnight.

“Hard to be better than perfect,” Otto whispered, placing a tiny kiss on the shell of Alwin’s ear, slowly, so he could watch him do it in the rippling water.

The cloud scattered, the self-doubt ebbing gently.

“Is it really enough?” Alwin asked.

Otto smiled. “It is if you think it is. I, for one, love getting to keep the parts of you I fell for.”

He took Alwin’s hand in his, twined their fingers together, and squeezed gently.

“These hands feel perfect when they hold mine,” he said, and Alwin squeezed back.

Otto’s other hand traveled over Alwin’s arm and shoulder to settle between his shoulder blades.

Alwin knew he was tracing the marks along his spine.

“I hope these keep letting me know you want me as much as I want you.”

“Even if they don’t,” Alwin said, “just take it as a blanket statement that I always want you.”

“Green is my favorite color, and to see it on the skin of my favorite person is the best bonus.”

“Now you’re just saying things.” Alwin squirmed and Otto shook his head, leaning his head down to kiss Alwin’s shoulder. Scrapes and bruises still littered his skin, and Alwin felt him linger on each one, kissing the remaining pain away.

“Any shape of you,” he said between kisses, “is exactly what I want.”

Alwin shivered at the feeling of Otto’s breath on his skin, and he tilted his head back to allow Otto more room to kiss and nip at his neck. Alwin wrapped his arms around Otto’s neck and pulled him closer, breathing hard.

“I love you,” Otto said against Alwin’s collarbone.

“I love you too, young master,” Alwin whispered.

“You still owe me an explanation, you know,” Otto said, warm breath heating Alwin’s skin. “Why young master?”

“Because it’s what you are. The master of my heart, my love…my fate. You have been since the very start.”

“Alwin…” Otto said, moving to look him in the eye, but Alwin pushed his fingers into his thick hair to hold him in place.

“Please,” Alwin said, voice thick and heavy with emotion. With need. With want.

“Please what, my prince?” Otto asked, catching the tendon of Alwin’s neck right next to his throat sac between his teeth and giving it a gentle tug.

“I want you.” Alwin shifted until he could climb into Otto’s lap fully, so unused to just asking for things but knowing he would be heard with Otto.

His legs wrapped around Otto’s waist, and their hips met, making both of them moan.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Otto said, even as his hands slid down Alwin’s back and onto his ass to pull him closer. “You’re still injured.”

“I can barely feel any pain. Just the ache for you.”

“You have a way with words,” Otto said with a smile. “You make it hard to deny you anything.”

“Then don’t deny me,” Alwin whispered, lips seeking Otto’s, meeting in the middle and swallowing whatever protest Otto tried to voice.

The kiss felt so different now that his mouth was human again.

Their lips fit together perfectly, slotting against each other, tugging and biting until they were both bruised and aching.

But the difference was still there too. In the shape of Alwin’s tongue that was still long and whip fast, unable to keep up with the dexterity of Otto’s as it dipped inside to taste the end of his.

“Otto…” Alwin felt the dampness between his legs spreading. Another thing he got to carry with him into his life as a human again.

“Do you want to be on top?” Otto asked, and Alwin’s brain froze.

“On top as in…inside you?” he asked. “Or just…on top?”

“Whatever will hurt you the least,” Otto said, kissing his way down Alwin’s neck to his collarbones. The slick feeling between his cheeks intensified at the thought. He hadn’t allowed himself to think about it, to hope for it. And yet…

“You’d want that? Me inside of you?”

“I want you in any and every way I can have you,” Otto said, pushing his hands beneath Alwin’s clothes and running them over heated skin.

His skilled fingers found the curve of Alwin’s spine, running down it until they reached the swell of his backside. They unbuttoned his breeches deftly, lifting Alwin up to stand above him before pushing them out of the way until he was completely naked.