Page 29 of The Frog Prince (The GriMM Tales #6)

Otto shrugged. It was such a sweet gesture from someone so large and imposing that Alwin found himself smiling without even noticing he was doing it, completely charmed.

“And I’m here,” Otto said eventually, making Alwin’s brain spin. “If that’s a selling point.”

Alwin wanted to scream that it was the only one that mattered. That Otto being there was the best part of all his recent days.

“Very well.” He swallowed hard, trying to force his voice to come out evenly. “I can sit at the foot—”

“Absolutely not.” Otto slipped his boots off and lowered himself onto the bed, scooting toward the wall. “You slept on the floor next to me once before, and all that did was make me feel guilty because you were uncomfortable all night.”

He patted the space next to him and looked up at Alwin, a siren illuminated by fairy light, beckoning him to his possible demise.

He walked straight into its cold embrace, sitting down gingerly on the edge of the bed, his back to Otto. His cold heart was hammering in his chest, his hands shaking where they gripped the side of the lily blanket.

“Lie down,” Otto whispered, breath wisping past his cheek and making him shudder.

Alwin did as he was told, at the mercy of Otto’s whims. There was enough space for them both to fit comfortably, even with how wide Otto was, but he still folded himself up awkwardly until he was taking up as little space as he could.

Careful not to touch Otto, not to crowd into his space, not to breathe too much in his direction lest he changed his mind and Alwin was back to sleeping all on his own in the cold depths.

Suppressing the surge of excitement in his blood was impossible, happiness bursting like bubbles. Above all else, however, was hope. Desperate, all-encompassing hope, acting like the strongest drug.

“It’s soft,” Otto murmured into the twinkling night.

Alwin turned his head to look at Otto’s strong profile—the arch of his nose, which scrunched when he was deep in thought, the line of his jaw that begged for kisses, the hair falling haphazard and messy, like fingers had been running through it.

Alwin’s own fingers twitched, the sensitive tips puckering. He curled them into his palms and smothered a croak. “I did my best.”

Otto turned his head—so close, so intimate. “Thank you,” he whispered.

“You’re very welcome,” Alwin replied with a small smile he hoped remained hidden by the darkness, letting his eyes slip shut before they revealed too much.

Otto’s eyes didn’t move from his face, and Alwin tried not to squirm under the scrutiny, his webbed feet curling at the end of the bed.

“What did you make it from?” came the question just a few moments later.

Alwin opened his eyes again but kept his gaze on Otto’s jaw. “The bed?”

“Yes.”

“Moss, some soft grass I collected, lily pads. I lent it just a bit of my magic to keep it from rotting. It should hold, I hope.”

Otto’s hand moved up into the space between them, directly into Alwin’s view. “You bargained something of yours for me again?” he whispered.

Alwin nodded slowly.

“I would have been fine sleeping on the floor.”

“I wouldn’t have wanted you to,” Alwin said, finally risking a glance up.

He was giving away too much. He was letting Otto in too far, but Alwin was powerless to resist him.

“Even from the start, I found that my heart wouldn’t have been able to rest easy seeing you anything less than happy and comfortable. ”

Otto’s eyes contained a storm in the wake of his words.

An arm snuck out and wrapped around his waist, and Alwin gasped into the night before he was tugged toward the middle of the bed, colliding with a broad chest. The top of his head brushed against a sharp chin and warm breath hit his skin.

His shoulder dug into Otto’s sternum and his elbow ended up in his stomach.

Too close. He was so, so close.

Otto pushed himself up onto one arm, looming over him. “Thank you, again.”

“You don’t have to—”

“Yes, I do. My entire life, there have been others I had to take care of. My family, my friends, my patients. I don’t think I know how to graciously accept being cared for the way you care for me. But I do appreciate it.”

Alwin swallowed around the lump in his throat, lying perfectly still and stiff, his body half underneath Otto’s on the bed he had made for him with his own hands.

He didn’t know how to deal with it. He wasn’t prepared for it.

He had hoped for so long, and now that the chance was there, he was completely lost.

“I’ll try to always put you first,” Alwin said, because he didn’t know what else to say. It was the deepest truth he owned.

He couldn’t promise always, as much as he might wish he could. He’d grown up knowing part of him would always belong to someone else; his people, his kingdom, his responsibilities.

But anything left was Otto’s in entirety.

A cool hand landed on his cheek, thick fingers splaying around his head and the tip of a thumb brushing against the corner of his lip as his face was coaxed up.

Their eyes met in the darkness, their skin reflecting the soft glow of the flowers around them. The water was sloshing against the outside walls, and the silence told Alwin they were truly alone.

His breath caught in his chest, heart hammering so loudly he was sure Otto could hear it. The fingers resting on either side of his hips gripped the worn material of his breeches and held on, wishing it would anchor him well enough not to fly away.

“Alwin…” Otto whispered.

Before Alwin could say anything, before he could reply, Otto’s head bent, and then soft, warm lips were on his.

Alwin’s eyes rolled in his head, his body freezing at the unfamiliar sensation. Nobody had ever kissed him in this form. Nobody had ever touched this version of him like this.

He stayed perfectly still, just feeling Otto’s lips moving across his own. Gentle and undemanding. Setting tiny fires in Alwin’s skin. Making his head ring. Making tidal waves form in his chest and tears sting his eyes.

He was drowning. He wanted to kiss Otto back, but he knew he couldn’t.

He wasn’t human. He couldn’t kiss him like a man would. He couldn’t purse this wide mouth enough to catch lips, or tangle tongues in passion. Every natural movement to him now felt blocked or awkward, screaming at him that he was not the same as he once was.

He wasn’t sure Otto understood that.

“Let me in,” Otto whispered against his lips. “Please.”

He ran his tongue across Alwin’s bottom lip and Alwin’s brain finally won over his desires. He placed his hands on Otto’s chest and pushed.

Otto went easily, without protest, respecting Alwin’s space and following his lead.

“Alwin?” he asked, cheeks flushed ruddy red, pupils blown under weighted lashes.

Alwin wanted nothing more than to lose himself in him. The crawling under his own skin made Alwin give his chest another push until he could sit up.

“My apologies,” he said, lips still burning, mind still reeling from it.

“No, you don’t have to apologize. I probably should, though. If I’ve done something you didn’t want.”

“No!” Alwin jumped to reassure him, making Otto flinch. “I mean, no, you didn’t. I…I do want it…”

“But?”

He scooted himself to the edge of the bed and sat with his back to Otto, resting his head on his palms. What was wrong with him?

“Talk to me,” Otto whispered.

Alwin closed his eyes. “Why?”

“Because I want to know.”

“No, why did you kiss me?” Alwin asked.

He heard rustling as Otto came to sit beside him, his warm presence comforting and confusing at the same time.

“I wanted to,” Otto said simply.

“I’m not human. I can’t kiss you the way a man would.”

“I am very aware of that,” Otto replied, almost shy. “I…I don’t mind that.”

“How can you not mind it?” Alwin frowned. “It wouldn’t feel the same. It wouldn’t…feel right for you. It might not be good for you. I can’t say.”

“I don’t have an explanation. I just know I enjoy your company, and I wanted to kiss you. So I did. I’m sorry if I crossed a line.”

“You didn’t. There are no lines for you. I simply…I wasn’t ready to disappoint you.”

“I wouldn’t have been disappointed,” Otto whispered, sliding his hand over and brushing against the back of Alwin’s fingers. Alwin turned them over slowly, the sticky, pink pads revealed. “I understand your kisses will be different in form. It doesn’t mean I wish for them any less.”

Alwin lost a breath at the implication, meeting Otto’s bold gaze that was battling with his embarrassed blush.

He got a vivid image of his finger against Otto’s mouth, smearing wetness and tugging at his lips the way his own couldn’t.

Of them sucking ‘kisses’ against his skin, suctioning bruises that would last longer than a passionate mouth.

“But it is completely okay not to be ready,” Otto said, averting his eyes, as if to avoid pressuring him.

It stunned Alwin. Otto constantly put Alwin off balance, offering him validation where he thought to find a scorn that matched his self-disgust.

“Perhaps…someday?” Alwin said, feeling like he was pushing his luck. Like he’d just thrown away something he’d never get the chance to have again.

He should have counted his blessings that Otto had done it in the first place. He should have taken what was offered and been grateful for it. He should have let it happen and cherished the chance to have it in the first place.

Stopping him and then demanding things he had no right to demand was too much. Much more than he deserved.

“Someday sounds like a very good idea,” Otto said.

Alwin turned to look at him, the storm inside him settling at the sight of that gentle, kind smile directed at him. “It does?”

“I’m here, Alwin. I…I might not know what this is, but I know I want you. So, whenever you feel ready, I’ll be here.”

“I don’t know if I’ll have the courage to initiate.” Alwin looked away again.

“I don’t mind initiating,” Otto said, “as long as you promise to do just what you did now. Stop me if you don’t want it?”

“That doesn’t sound terribly fair.”

“I’m the only one affected, and I say it’s plenty fair.” Otto sprawled back onto the bed, pulling the dried moss blanket on top of him.

Alwin watched him in the dark and realized he was lying much closer to the center of the bed than before, leaving very little room.

“Can I…” He wished he could find his way back to the suave prince he used to be. This stuttering, insecure mess of a being just wasn’t fun. “Can I still sleep here?”

“Of course.” Otto spread his arms and wiggled his fingers. “Do you mind if I hold you?”

“No,” Alwin whispered.

Otto gave his fingers another wiggle, inviting him in.

Alwin cuddled close, resting his head on Otto’s shoulder and curling up into a ball against his side on top of the blanket. Otto folded his strong arms around him and made himself comfortable.

“Good night, Alwin,” he said.

“Good night, young master.”

“I can’t wait to see what His Froggy Highness does with his days here,” Otto said and Alwin let out a croaky laugh, pinching his side.

“I’ll show you tomorrow,” he promised.

Otto hummed and settled, falling asleep within moments as the exhaustion of travel overtook him. Alwin fought against sleep for another hour, wishing he could stay awake forever just to savor the feeling of Otto’s arms around him.

Exhaustion caught up eventually, and he slipped into dreams of gold with his lips and fingers still tingling.