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CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Half an hour later, I shut the passenger side door of Cameron’s car behind me. Uneasy tension lingered between us as he drove from the hotel to the office. I checked my phone for any new notifications, feeling nauseous just from looking.

“Henry’s request is unreasonable,” Cameron said. He hadn’t smiled since the pool. “We were already cutting it close before.”

“Unfortunately, we’re expected to turn unrealistic demands into reality. He is paying for premium service,” I replied. “I’m going to make a few phone calls, if you don’t mind?”

“Of course,” he said, but he sounded robotic. “I’d be working too, if I wasn’t driving.”

I spent the rest of the drive calling various departments, answering questions and trying to assure everyone that we could achieve the project by the deadline. My fingers itched for a laptop, anything bigger than a phone, so I could do some real work.

When I looked at the time and realized it would be night by the time we arrived, my throat tightened. I was hoping to arrive earlier, so I had more time. But it would be okay — I’d just need to spend the night at the office.

The only upside about the work emergency is that it meant I was too busy to spend too much time thinking about Cameron. Only yesterday, I had been imagining going on weekend getaways more frequently. I’d had ideas of spending nights together, and wasting away Saturday mornings. I’d even been proud of myself for taking more time to myself.

Look at how that worked out.

Now, I couldn’t bear to look at Cameron, otherwise I’d see the hurt expression on his face. I felt guilty, but angry too. He was supposed to be my assistant. We’d both screwed up.

Maybe this wouldn’t have happened if I’d been with another man. If I’d gone on holiday with someone who wasn’t my employee, this wouldn’t have happened. This imaginary other man wouldn’t have encouraged me to unplug from work. Cameron would’ve alerted me immediately of a work emergency. He would’ve held the fort at the office while I drove from the beach.

There was no point wondering about it now .

Finally, we arrived at the office. Before Cameron could even turn off the car engine, I was already flying out of the passenger’s seat.

I practically ran into the building, panic pounding in my chest as I hurried to the elevator. Once I stepped out onto the main floor where the design offices were, I rushed to Hannah’s office, seeing her at her computer with two other designers huddled around her. “Where are we at?”

“We’re going over the documents and design notes for the original version and dividing up responsibilities,” Hannah explained as she showed me on her computer screen. “Video ads, web ads, promotional posts, everything.”

“Alright, once everything is divided up, put it in a document and share it with me so that I can keep up with progress made,” I told her, keeping my voice as strong and steady as I could. If I freaked out, they would freak out even more, and nothing would get done.

Cameron stepped into the room, breathing a little heavier than usual. He glanced at me, face tight, before looking away. “What can I do to help?”

“Stay with them,” I told him in a firm voice. “I’m going to keep an open line of communication with Henry and feed him updates as we go along.”

Cameron looked over at me again, like he expected me to change my mind and keep him by my side. But I couldn’t be near him right now .

I turned to Hannah. “I’ll be set up in my office. Put out a list of tasks. I’ll tackle everything that I can while dealing with Henry.”

Hannah nodded in understanding. “I’ll keep you updated.”

I strode out of the room, passing by Cameron without even looking at him. This wasn’t a problem that we could solve in a weekend, but starting today showed Henry that we were serious and dedicated to making him a satisfied client, and it also allowed us to get a head start on the new week of hell.

Once I reached my office, I shut myself inside and got to work, checking on my team’s progress and relaying them to Henry to get feedback. I just hoped this didn’t cost me good employees. I could feel the tension up and down the halls as everyone rushed to fulfill Henry’s last minute wishes. Their irritation and exhaustion didn’t go unnoticed by me, and I knew that I would have to think of a good way to thank them all besides paying them overtime.

Around nine o’clock, Hannah appeared in the doorway of my office, looking tired. “There is still a lot left, but I think it can wait until tomorrow. In the meantime, I’ve sent off rough drafts for approval.”

I tore my eyes away from my computer screen, blinking them a few times as they stung from staring at the screen for too long. I didn’t even realize how much time had passed .

“Get some rest. Make sure the others leave too. Kick them out if you have to,” I told her.

Hannah gave me a half-smile. “We’re going to get this done. We’ll just need to rally.”

Hell, we needed a miracle, but I didn’t say that out loud.

“We’ll rally,” I assured her. “Thanks, Hannah.”

Hannah nodded and dragged herself out. I heard her voice down the hallway as she told the other designers to head out for the night. Employees from other departments slowly left too, and soon there wasn’t any noise at all.

I put my head back down, reviewing everything that the design team had put together. I left some notes for tomorrow, adding my opinions and, more importantly, Henry’s.

I still managed to find things to do, checking a few small things off the list of things to do that Hannah sent to everyone. It wasn’t much, but it would clear up time for Hannah and the others to focus on more important things.

A knock on my door dragged me out of my busy daze. Cameron stood in the doorway, looking concerned.

“You should head home, Cameron,” I said. “Get some rest before tomorrow.”

“I will, if you go too.”

I frowned. Why was he trying to bargain with me? “I’m fine. Go home. Get some sleep.” When it looked like he was going to argue, I added, “I’m saying this as your boss. ”

Cameron flinched. “Don’t speak to me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like I’m just an employee. Forget about work for a second. I’m telling you — as someone who cares about you — that you need to get some rest.” He walked up to my desk. “I’m sorry about what happened, Alison. I’m sorry that I took you away from the office on a weekend. If I knew there was a possibility of this happening, I wouldn’t have taken you so far away.”

“I know,” I said. He’d never do anything stupid on purpose, but I shouldn’t have let myself get swept away. “I can’t think about any of this right now. I have to focus on work.”

His shoulders sank. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” I said, “that until this project is finished, I need to forget about this.” I gestured between us. “It’s a distraction.”

“So what?” he asked. “I should just treat you like a boss and nothing more?”

“Yes,” I said. “And I will treat you like my employee.”

He frowned. “We can’t pretend we’re nothing to each other, just because it’s convenient.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s unfair. And hurtful. Earlier today, when you snapped at me…” he trailed off. “I know I’m your subordinate. But I thought we respected each other. Outside of work, I thought we saw each other as equals.” He took a deep breath. “I can’t be with someone who’s my girlfriend one second, and ordering me around the next.”

I sucked in a breath at the word girlfriend . I tried to keep my voice neutral, but it came out sounding colder than I intended. “I don’t know what you were expecting when you got involved with your boss.”

He was silent for a long moment. “Right,” he said eventually, taking a step back.

“Sorry,” I said, pushing a hand through my hair. Suddenly, I felt exhausted. “I’m sorry, Cameron. But…I don’t think I can deal with this right now. Please go home.”

For a second, I thought he might argue, and then I really would lose my patience. But instead he just nodded, looking defeated, and left the office.

After the door closed behind him, I heard his footsteps as he headed towards the elevator. Once he was gone, I felt empty. My bottom lip trembled for a second, but I pressed my teeth into it to still the motion. I took a deep breath and returned all of my attention to my computer.

I just had to work. That would fix the emptiness I felt inside.

Hours passed, but when it was two in the morning, I was yawning so much that I couldn’t ignore it anymore. I shut off my computer and my main light, only leaving on my desk lamp. There was still a lot of work to do, so I wasn’t going home just yet .

A nap would do fine for now.

I walked over to the couch in my office and laid down, pulling a fuzzy blanket over me as I used my arm as my pillow. It wasn’t the most comfortable sleeping arrangement, but I was so tired from today that I passed out in a few minutes.

The three hours of sleep that I allowed myself to have passed by quickly, leaving me feeling heavy and achy when I woke up at around five o’clock in the morning. The sky was still dark outside, but once I switched on the main light in my office, my brain woke up a little faster.

I walked through the hallway in a daze, fixing myself a cup of coffee before returning to my office to get back to work. I wasn’t a fool. I knew how bad this was for me, but the only other option was to slack off and fail.

I just had to hold on.

An uneasy, jittery feeling hummed throughout my body as I stood at the front of the conference room.

“What do we think?” I asked as my eyes swept over my employees.

Hannah turned to me and nodded, looking as exhausted and worn down as everyone else in the room. “We went over all his notes and made all the changes that he told us to. This is our best.”

Austin, the marketing specialist, nodded in agreement from the other side of the table. “Yeah, this is all we have in the tank.”

I breathed in slowly, letting the air fill my lungs. I felt terrible today, but at least it was Friday. Finally.

This week had been absolute hell, but thanks to power naps in my office and numerous cups of coffee, I made it through in one piece. Mostly. At least we finished every piece needed for the campaign, and now all we had to do was send it to Henry.

“I like it,” I told them as I crossed my arms over my chest, which had been feeling tense all week.

My eyes shifted toward the door of the conference room, catching sight of Cameron. He looked in my direction, but it didn’t feel like he was truly looking at me. His eyes seemed blank and empty like I was staring into pits of darkness.

Recently, he barely looked at me in the eyes. We only discussed work, and there was a tense coldness separating us. I couldn’t believe we had been having the time of our lives at the beach only a week ago.

I tore my eyes away from Cameron and turned back to my design team. “Let’s send him what we have and close out this project.”

A palpable sense of relief flooded the room.

“Thank you for all your hard work,” I continued. “I know this blindsided us, but we all came together and got it done. I’m so grateful to have such hardworking and talented people working with me. Once we get confirmation that he’s received everything and he’s signed off on it all, everyone can go home early today.” I hoped that Henry would be quick about it, so my employees could go home and sleep or see their families.

There were a few murmured responses, and then everyone poured out of the conference room, tired like zombies. I headed to my office, and kept checking my email, nervousness churning in my stomach as I waited for Henry’s confirmation.

Around noon, my office phone rang.

“It’s Henry,” Cameron said. He used the same purely professional tone he’d used with me all week.

“Great, put him through. Thank you.”

There was a click, and then Henry’s voice came out of the speaker. “Alison,” he boomed.

“Hi, Henry,” I said, trying to sound calm. “Did you receive our email with your campaign products?”

“Sure did. Everything looks good to me.”

Thank god. “Are you sure?” I asked, just in case. “We won’t be able to make any last-minute revisions once you sign off on it.”

“Yep, it all looks good. Thanks for getting it all to me by the deadline,” Henry replied, sounding far too relaxed for someone who’d lit a fire under my company.

“Of course. Thank you for trusting us with your marketing needs,” I told him, pitching the usual corporate line of gratitude .

We said our goodbyes and ended the call. I slumped back in my chair, closing my eyes as I reveled in the moment by myself for just a few seconds.

We did it. It was all over with. We could go back to normal.

I drew in a deep breath before drafting an email to send to everyone in the company.

With great pleasure, I’d like to inform everyone that Henry Johnson of LearnQuest has accepted our marketing materials without any complaints or requests for revisions. I would like to thank everyone for their hard work and diligence. Without all of you and your determination, this campaign wouldn’t have been completed in time.

This project is officially closed. Please enjoy the rest of your day and have a restful weekend.

I hit the send button, and it wasn’t long before I heard people leaving their offices and heading out, sounding a lot more energetic than they had in the conference room. A huge weight had been taken off everyone’s shoulders.

As for me, I could take a break. A short nap and then lunch sounded wonderful.

Before I could even get up from my desk, there was a knock on my door. I expected it to be Hannah or one of my other department leads, but it was Cameron. My chest tightened as we stared at each other, my body feeling frozen in place.

Cameron cleared his throat and glanced behind him. “ Can we talk?”

I nodded and motioned for him to come in, trying to ignore the mix of guilt and hope I felt.

Cameron stepped into my office and shut the door behind him, a frown lingering on his face as he slowly approached my desk. He didn’t make it all the way over to me, though, stopping a few feet away.

“I’m sorry,” I blurted out, standing up. “Last week, at the hotel, I took my frustration out on you. I know it wasn’t your fault. It was bad luck.”

Cameron stared at me.

I swallowed, forcing myself to go on. “I know you had my wellbeing in mind. You just wanted us to have fun. I’m sorry I haven’t made time to talk.” I thought of the conversation we had. I don’t think I can deal with this right now. Please go home.

Now that the project had finished, my mind had cleared enough. I knew our relationship had gotten a bit messed up, but we could still fix it. I just needed to apologise, and things could go back to normal.

Cameron gave me a sad smile and somehow, that felt scarier than if he looked angry. “I like you so much, Alison. You’re one of the most amazing people that I’ve ever met. That’ll never change.”

“Cameron,” I began, my heart aching.

“I thought I would be able to do this,” he continued, “but the more I’ve thought about it, I realized I can’t. Like I told you, I can’t date a woman who will switch from being my girlfriend to my boss in a second. When we started this, I didn’t think it would be a big deal, but you have the power. Our relationship is unbalanced in a way I can’t ignore.”

I did have the power. Of course, I did. But naively, I also thought it wouldn’t matter.

I desperately searched for a solution, trying to keep calm, even though my body felt tight. “What if I promoted you to a higher position? You would still work for me, but you wouldn’t be directly under me. We would be more equal,” I suggested.

“I’m not saying this to get a promotion out of you,” he said, looking alarmed.

Shit. I didn’t want him to walk away. “What about a raise?” I asked, voice rising with panic. “I’ll give you a huge raise. You can buy whatever you want or move into a better apartment.”

Please say yes. Please say yes. Please say yes —

Cameron made an incredulous sound. “A better apartment? I know mine’s not luxurious like yours, but I figured it was good enough.”

I winced. “No, no. I didn’t mean that —”

“You’re just so far ahead of me,” he interrupted. “I’ve spent the past week wondering, what do you want with me? I knew you wanted sex. But is there anything I can give you? You earn more than me. You have your own company. You can buy whatever you want. I can organize a weekend getaway at the beach, but it won’t be anything special.”

“It was special,” I insisted.

He shrugged. “You’re used to fancy restaurants and 5-star resorts.”

What was I supposed to say? How was I supposed to convince him? “I’m sorry our getaway was cut short. I can reimburse you for the hotel. I know it would’ve been expensive —”

“No,” he said, voice firm. “It was a gift.” He sighed, sounding frustrated. “This is what I mean. I don’t want money. I don’t want a promotion. I don’t want a raise. I want —” He cut himself off and shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. Forget it.”

He’d given up. I could hear it in his voice and see it in the slump of his shoulders.

I took a few shaky breaths, and my hand moved to my stomach, steadying myself. “Are we ending this?” I asked, trying my best to sound calm.

Cameron gazed at me for what felt like a painful eternity, his jaw tensing as he gathered himself. “I’m sorry,” he said.

I tried to say something, but no words came out. And eventually, he turned around and walked out of my office, his apology lingering in the air.

We were done .

Tears finally fell from my eyes, coursing down my cheeks as my bottom lip trembled. My hand flew to my mouth, quieting a sob that burst from me. My knees weakened, forcing me to sit in my chair as my body shuddered.

I shouldn’t have been shocked. I should’ve seen this coming. But still, it hurt so, so much.