Page 19 of The Duke’s Defiant Angel (Dukes Gone Dirty #1)

19

R aff stilled, his gaze sharpening as her eyes welled with tears.

Bloody hell.

“Don’t cry.” It was a gruff command, far from gentle, and he felt like an absolute arse as she sniffed and tried to stifle it.

“I heard Foley,” she said, her small hand fitting into his and giving it a tug until he sank beside her on the bed.

The scent of her, so sweet and heady, wrapped around him and made him want to banish Foley’s name from existence so he could bury himself inside her again and forget every fear that knave had stirred inside him.

But instead, he faced her all-seeing gaze as every fear he’d ever harbored slid out from the depths where he’d tried to bury them.

Meanwhile, his mind was scrambling to adjust the lie. To spare her feelings. That was why he’d lied in the first place. He’d taken one look at those wide eyes, those sweet lips, the gentleness in her gaze, and he’d...he’d lied.

He’d do it again, too, if it meant banishing those tears from her eyes. He reached out to brush aside an errant tear, his voice still gruff but gentler now as he said, “Please don’t cry, love. He’s not worth it.”

She sniffed and nodded. “I know that,” she said. “I’m not crying over him.”

“How much…” He arched his brows. “That is, how much did you hear?”

“Enough,” she said. “Enough to know that you lied about why he’d come.” Her gaze was unrelenting.

Had he ever thought her biddable and simple? Lord, but he was a fool.

“Why did you lie?”

He winced, gesturing to her tears. “To avoid this.”

He’d tried to add some levity to his tone, but her gaze was serious and even. “You lied to spare my feelings.”

It wasn’t a question, so he didn’t reply.

She shifted, so she was coming up on her knees, putting her eyes nearly level with his. “And not telling me about my parents,” she said, her hands on her hips. “Was that to spare my feelings, too?”

He flinched at the intensity of her stare.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” she said.

“How did you know?” he asked, curiosity winning out over self-preservation.

“I had tea with my mother today.” Her gaze cut to his. “She seemed to think I already knew about the fact that I had no dowry, that Albert had washed his hands of me, and that I’d been destined to marry one of my father’s lecherous old friends to pay off his debts.”

Raff drew in an inhale with a hissing sound, his gaze moving over her face to try and suss out her emotions.

She couldn’t be so calm about this. Not even the coldest woman would be unfeeling in the face of these revelations.

And his wife was anything but cold.

His heart ached when he caught the glimmer of hurt in her eyes that she was trying to hide.

Folding her into his arms, he held her tight, her heart pounding against his. “Ah, love,” he murmured. “I’m sorry you learned of that.”

“I’m not.” Her voice was high with emotion but firm. Confident. “You were right,” she said, pushing against his chest gently until she met his gaze. “When you told Foley that I’d been naive?—”

“Sweetheart, I did not mean?—”

“No, Raff.” She pressed a finger to his lips gently, smiling sweetly when he caught the tip lightly between his teeth. “I’m telling you that you were right. I was hopelessly naive. In many ways, I still am. I grew up living in daydreams and fantasy worlds of my own creation.”

He felt a surge of warmth and tenderness as her cheeks pinkened, and her smile turned shy.

“I know now that Foley was an extension of that. I didn’t know him. Not truly. But he seemed a safe place to pour all my silly fantasies.” She clutched his arms when he stiffened. “I never felt anything real toward him. He just seemed like freedom to me after a lifetime of disappointing my parents and feeling like an outsider in my own home.”

He nodded. “I can understand that.”

“Can you?”

She looked so hopeful, and that hope seemed to jar loose a truth of his own.

“I suppose I did something similar with you,” he said. “I knew from the first moment that I wanted you. And your sweetness, your timidness, your innocence…” He let out a huff of exasperation as he tried to figure out how to say it without hurting her feelings. “I suppose I took one look at you and thought I could have it all without the risks.”

Her brow furrowed. “How so?”

A pain he hadn’t acknowledged for a decade crept into his voice. “I looked at you and saw what it might be to have a sweet, docile wife, who would admire and love me unconditionally. Who would give me the family I’d always craved without expecting anything in return.”

She bit her lip, amusement glinting in her eyes. “And instead, you got me.”

A surprised laugh escaped him, and he cupped her cheeks in his hands with a tender kiss. “Luckily for me, yes. I know now that what I’d thought I’d wanted wouldn’t have been enough. I hadn’t wanted to admit to myself that I wanted more. I wanted real. I wanted....” He swallowed, his gaze colliding with hers. “I want you, Evangeline. Not just in name and not only your body.” He leaned in, his chest threatening to burst as his heart swelled dangerously. “I want all of you.”

She leaned into him until her lips grazed his. “You have me,” she whispered against his lips. “All of me.”

He couldn’t speak as emotions choked him.

She ran her fingers through his hair. “That’s what I’ve been trying to say, Raff. I might not have picked you for myself, but I am grateful all the same.”

After a tense moment, he brought himself to ask the question that had plagued him ever since Foley’s departure. “And you don’t think...that is, I am not…” He cleared his throat. “I’ve not forced you into some new prison?”

She shook her head quickly, her eyes brimming with tears. “No, Raff. No. And I hate Foley for even suggesting as much.”

“I know I am not the warmest of men. I don’t know how to be a husband?—”

“And I don’t know how to be a wife. But you are kind, Raff. I knew that before today. I knew that almost from the start, truthfully.”

“You did?”

She smiled, and it felt as though the clouds parted with that sweet, angelic smile. “I know you meant to torture me by making me beg, but by not forcing me to be intimate, you gave me a gift. And then you gave me more gifts each and every time you taught me what pleasure meant.”

Her arms wrapped around his waist as she spoke, and she pressed her soft curves into his hard planes. He held her tight, sliding one hand down to cup her bottom and drag her closer, so his hard length was nestled between her thighs.

She gasped, her eyelids fluttering as her lips parted.

“Mmm, you know you taught me a valuable lesson in turn, don’t you?” he asked as he nibbled at her lower lip.

“I did?”

“You did. Up until you, I’d never understood how meaningful sex could be. I’d thought it solely physical. A release. A quick pleasure. But you…” He closed his lips over her neck and grinned at her low moan. “You made it feel like so much more than two bodies coming together.”

Her soft giggle had him pulling back in surprise.

“Perhaps I’ll make a romantic of you yet,” she teased.

He chuckled before kissing her hard, slanting his mouth over hers to taste every bit of her. “You could try,” he taunted. “And in return, I’ll teach my angel the joys of the flesh.”

“Raff.” She pulled back, her eyes wide and urgent.

“What is it?”

“I want it all with you. I may still be naive, and perhaps even childish, but I want to learn, and I want to have experiences, and I want...I want everything.”

His heart was a mangled wreck at the earnest affection in her eyes.

“What’s everything, love? Because I’d give you the world if that’s what you asked for.”

Her smile trembled, and he caught the flare of vulnerability.

She slid her hand down, stroking him through his breeches. “I want a family...with you.”

He groaned, his hips jerking as he pressed himself into her hand.

He leaned forward, tipping her over, so he could lie on top of her, already pulling off her dress, so he could lavish her lush breasts with open-mouthed kisses. “I want to fill you with my seed and have you round with my child,” he agreed.

She cupped his face, dragging him up so their eyes met.

“I want you to be there with me. I don’t want to be apart.”

She looked so scared, as if he might ever refuse such an offer.

His chest tightened painfully as he gazed down at her. “You want a home with me, love?”

She nodded quickly, biting her lip. “I know you said you wanted your freedom but?—”

He kissed her hard to silence her. “I was a fool. I thought happiness meant being able to do as I pleased with whomever I pleased. But what I want—what I’ve always wantedis a— home.” He swallowed hard as his hands trailed over her perfect features. “A family.”

She nodded, her eyes wet with tears. “Me, too.”

He leaned down until his nose grazed hers. “I want love.”

He felt her smile against his lips. He tasted her tears. “I want love, too.”

“Then you shall have it,” he whispered, his voice harsh with emotion as he lifted her skirts.

Her hands scrambled to help, and soon, they were naked in their need to seal this new vow.

She was wet and hot and whimpering with need by the time he had her naked beneath him. She spread her legs wide in welcome, a seductive smile tugging at her lips as she ran her fingers down teasingly, stroking herself as she gazed up at him from beneath heavy lids.

“Show me how much you love me, Raff,” she whispered.

He fell over her, thrusting his cock all the way into her tight channel in one hard thrust. “Every day, my love. I’ll show you every day.”

Her head fell back as she lifted her hips to meet his, their bodies moving in harmony as they held each other close. He showered her with kisses as she stroked him and held him close.

All the while, they murmured their vows—promises of loyalty, of trust, of a future.

Promises of undying love.