Page 6 of The Dragon Wakes with Thunder (The Dragon Spirit Duology #2)

Five

The question of whether spirits are inherently good or evil has long been a subject of scholarly debate.

While some spirits have performed acts of kindness and others have committed malevolent deeds, their overall impact on humanity defies simple categorization.

What is widely agreed upon, however, is that spirits are agents of chaos, and like all things, must return to equilibrium.

For even balance cannot exist without chaos.

“Don’t you miss it? Don’t you miss the rush of power?”

My body thrummed with pulsating energy as I harnessed my lixia once more.

There was no discomfort, like trying on old clothes that no longer fit.

Rather, the weight of my spirit power felt like the heft of my sword—and my hands molded around it like the embrace of a long-lost friend.

I directed my lixia toward the soft earth—then drew qi from the land itself.

The trees groaned, the grass withered, and slowly, the endless greenery faded as I drew all water from the earth, leaving behind nothing but a barren layer of dust, and within it, a small, rippling darkness.

With reckless abandon, I lifted my face to the stars and called upon the rain.

As water plastered my hair and shoulders, I began to laugh, letting tears spring to my eyes.

There was nothing like this feeling—this heady exhilaration, this soaring rush that threatened to implode my chest. Was this what my father had once felt—when he’d taken that first hit of opium?

Like the world itself was reborn, and it was a radiant place, full of promise and thrill?

The dream dissolved like a shallow puddle, leaving no trace behind in the heat of day. I woke wondering why I felt so sore, despite walking no more than a few steps the day before.

When I stretched my arms, I noticed a series of brand-new scratches along my forearms. I stiffened with fear, wondering what this meant.

A spirit summoner did not need a gate to enter the spirit realm.

Instead, they could gain entry from anywhere in the human realm—by buying passage with their own blood.

Had I been drawing my own blood to access the spirit realm? And yet, rubbing the iron bands locked around my wrists, I knew this to be impossible. I could no more access the spirit realm wearing iron than I could fly. No, I must have simply scratched myself in the night.

Whispered voices in the sitting room roused me. Though I could not make out what they were saying, I could recognize that low, steady timbre anywhere—Sky. At once I scrambled out of bed, sliding open the screen divider.

Sky was leaning against the wall, arms folded and eyes flashing.

“He must believe she’s temporary. Otherwise he would never dare act so—” He stopped short when he saw me.

“Good morning,” he said, before his gaze roved down to my attire, or lack thereof.

I wore a thin shift meant for sleep and nothing else.

Sky flushed and coughed, turning away to stoke the fire needlessly.

I was puzzled by his sudden propriety, given that he’d seen me in less before.

“What did your father want yesterday?” I asked, once Lily had helped me into a robe.

Sky rubbed a tired hand across his face. “He’s obsessed with black magic, or what he believes is black magic.” He sighed. “He’s trying to obliterate every trace of it from the Three Kingdoms.”

I did not bother hiding my bewilderment. “Then why exactly is he letting me live?”

Sky shot a pointed look toward the door, which was closed. He came to me, then lowered his voice. “It’s not exactly confirmed that you’re a spirit summoner, Meilin. And I would prefer to keep it that way.”

“But Tao and Sparrow—they’ve both seen me—”

“They’ve been silenced.” At my look of astonishment, he clarified: “For a price. Did you think I would kill my own men?”

I shook my head. “But the jade…” My hand clenched around my necklace, where I wore my spirit seal.

Sky nodded. “It was replaced with a replica. Don’t ask me how.” He grimaced. “I had to resort to…less than ideal means.”

Lei, I realized, the memory surfacing from a foggy place. Lei had done this.

“But who are these other summoners?” I asked. “Where are they hiding? Do you know if their powers are those of the lesser spirits, or another Cardinal—”

“Meilin.” Sky stopped me, his hands coming around my shoulders. “Don’t concern yourself with these matters. Focus on recovering. That’s all I ask of you.” His grip tightened. “You’re so thin. It frightens me.”

“But—”

“You nearly died, do you know that? Winter couldn’t sense your life force anymore. If that Ximing traitor hadn’t stolen your jade back, you wouldn’t be here.”

“I-I know.”

“Winter wants you to be examined by a lixia specialist—”

“No,” I said, my stomach tightening at the thought. “Absolutely not.”

“Meilin, you need—”

“I will not be examined like a pig for slaughter,” I said harshly, the quaver in my voice betraying my fear. Sky must have heard it too, for he dropped the subject.

“You know, I’ve been researching the effects of lixia and how to counteract the withdrawal symptoms,” he said. “With time, I think you can heal…”

“What if it’s too late for me already?” I whispered, voicing aloud my worst fears. “During the war, I…” I ignored Xiuying’s cautions. I ignored Sky’s. I even ignored Qinglong’s.

I fidgeted with my sleeve, which hid the dark veins along my forearms. They had never returned to their usual color. Now the faint traces of black were permanent.

I had done this to myself.

“Let me show you something,” he said suddenly. “I was going to wait until it’s complete, but…” He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I wish I didn’t have to go so soon.”

“You’re leaving again?”

He nodded. “After the parade tomorrow.”

“What parade?”

Sky shooed me away to get dressed, clearly in a hurry. Leading me out of my rooms at a brisk pace, he brought us to a small reading library overlooking the nine-turn bridge.

“Have you been here before?” he asked.

“Yes, of course,” I said. “You know how close my rooms are—”

“I placed you there intentionally,” he said. “Watch closely. I don’t have much time.”

How many demands must weigh on him as a prince. The thought unsettled me, knowing his schedule was packed while I had nothing to do but wander the gardens. In war, I had been of use to him. But now I was nothing more than a burden to be coddled.

Sky checked to make sure no one was coming before running his fingers along the oak paneling, tapping until he came upon a hollow spot. A secret passageway.

With a soft click, the wood paneling came away, revealing a narrow corridor.

“Follow me,” he ordered. My heart racing, I followed him down a cramped flight of stairs, into a cave-like space hardly the size of my dressing room.

I expected hidden weapons, potions, even a dangerous beast. But not… books.

The room was lined with scrolls upon scrolls, some fallen to decay, others newly copied and unmarked by age.

“What is this place?” I asked. “Why all the secrecy?”

“I told you I’ve been gathering intelligence,” he explained. “For the past few months, I’ve been bidding on the black market for any texts on lixia.” His lips curled into an arrogant smile. “Word has spread of a wealthy bidder who will outbid anyone for a worthy text. I have quite a monopoly now.”

I gaped at him, at a complete loss for words. He had done this for me. To help me overcome my weakness, to help me regain my health. He could have kept the knowledge from me, choosing to leave me in the dark like so many others. Instead, he had given me access to every book he could buy.

“Sky…” I tried to swallow away the choky feeling in my throat. “I…you didn’t have to do this.”

“I wanted to do this,” he said. “To help you heal, to grow, to master your power.”

“You make it sound like I have a future.”

“You do have a future, Meilin. A very long one. With me—if you’ll have me.”

And to my shock, he produced a string of twisted red and gold thread, one tied in a loose knot to form a bracelet. An engagement band, which was worn ahead of a marriage ceremony.

“I love you,” he said simply, his voice low and unwavering. “I love who I am with you. You vex me. You frighten me. You challenge me. And I would have it no other way. With you by my side, I’m confident we can rebuild Anlai for the better. The people believe in you. As do I.”

I turned my agonized gaze on him. I wanted to explain what it felt like to have your insides ripped apart, then knit back together; to crave lixia so desperately you had no appetite, no thirst, no ability to pay close attention to anything beyond that craving, which was always there, biding its time, waiting for a moment of weakness. And he thought I could live?

But he loved me; I saw that now. He loved me, and it was a pure love, like nothing else within me was pure.

Without thinking, I flung my arms around him.

He staggered back in surprise, before wrapping his own arms around my waist and lifting me in the air.

I laughed and clung to him, feeling lighter than I had in a long time.

My robes parted indecently, but instead of scolding me he ran a warm calloused hand up my raised thigh, and I felt tendrils of long-buried desire rise up like smoke within me.

“Meilin,” he groaned into my mouth, and I only pressed myself more greedily against him, giving in to the fierce want that I’d nurtured ever since first laying eyes on him in a crowded market street.

His mouth tasted me hungrily, demanding me, claiming me as his. He came up for breath only to kiss my jaw, my throat, pressing his lips against the contours of my body. Carelessly, his hand grasped at my jade necklace, lifting it from my throat.

Immediately I froze, my body tensing with the cascade of emotions that spilled out of me at once—anger, resentment, jealousy, fear. Sky felt me stiffen and pulled away, releasing me.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “Did I hurt you?”

“No—no,” I said, though my expression must have suggested otherwise. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“I’m sorry,” said Sky, taking my hand in both of his and bringing it to his lips. “I don’t know what came over me . I shouldn’t have. I’m going to get my father’s approval to marry you, Meilin. I will marry you—I swear it.”

He thought I was afraid of becoming a ruined woman.

Unconsciously, I clenched my jade in a tight fist, finding immense relief in its constant pulse against my own.

For a second there, as Sky had taken my jade in his hand, a strange thought had occurred to me, one so unsettling I’d discarded it right away, like turning your head instinctively from a ghastly sight.

And yet, late that night as I was drifting into sleep, it returned to me:

I’d kill him , I’d thought. If he stole my jade, I’d kill him.