Page 74 of The Devoted Game

“Grace.” He reached out, touched her arm. “I know you don’t understand—”

“You’re damned right I don’t,” she snapped. “Let’s leave it at that.” She had wanted that assignment in Baltimore so badly. Her whole reason for joining the Bureau had been to make a difference. An assignment like Baltimore would have given her that opportunity. What the hell was she supposed to do here? Even when a big case came up, Worth didn’t put her on it. He wouldn’t have this time if McBride hadn’t insisted. How could she get the experience she needed for moving to the next level if she wasn’t given the chance?

Pierce drew in a big breath, let it go. “We both know why you decided to make law enforcement your career.”

What of it? Who wouldn’t want to fight the bad guys after going through that kind of thing? She had needed to turn her fear and hatred and bitterness into something constructive.

“In case you haven’t noticed,” she said, her voice harsh and stilted, “I’m doing a good job. I don’t need you looking over my shoulder.” Ifshe hadn’t had that one episode at the academy, none of this would be happening! But she had. She’d frozen up, just like she had with McBride at the cemetery, only worse. Her failure in that one training exercise had caused the deaths of two civilians and one agent, hypothetically of course.

She had been so upset that she had come apart in Pierce’s office and admitted that she still had problems with what happened when she was seventeen. Big mistake. Hiding that entire history would have been impossible; the background investigation would have exposed it. But she had fooled the psych evaluations, had convinced everyone that she was past the whole Nameless incident.

And then she’d had to go and let her core instructor see her crack.

Now she was paying the price. He had suggested an assignment to a smaller field office until after her probation to ensure less stress. So here she was, back in her hometown trying to prove she could take the pressure.

“Grace, you survived your worst nightmare,” he said, ignoring her assurance that she didn’t need him minding her business. “You killed the man responsible. You were strong, and it showed in your ability to survive.”

Here came the but . . .

“But then you changed your name and ran away, pretended it never happened.”

Fury bolted through her. “Do you really think I wanted to hang around and let the media hound me? To have people looking at me the way you are right now?”

Why couldn’t the past just be over? She didn’t want to look back. She wanted to move forward.

“If that were the only reason,” he said, without the exasperation he surely felt at this point, “we wouldn’t be having this conversation. You’ve been hiding for nine years. You have to face those demons and defeat them the same way you did the real thing. Otherwise you’ll be dealing with them forever.”

“Do we have anything else to talk about, Agent Pierce?” She stood at attention as if she were still one of his students. “If not, I’d like to go home. I’ve had a long day, and I had a long night before that.”

For several seconds he looked at her with that concerned, caring face that her father wore at moments like this ... that Worth wore whenever he passed her up for a prime case ... the same damned one McBride had worn this morning when he had ordered her out of that church.

Damn them all!

“I guess that’s all I have to say.”

Before she could escape, he added, “I’ll be here for a few days. We could have dinner.”

“Sure.” She wrenched open the door and fled to the corridor. She wanted out of here. Away from the weakness Pierce wanted to shove down her throat. She wasn’t weak. She was strong. The past didn’t matter anymore. It was over. Why didn’t he just let it go? How was she supposed to leave it alone if everyone else kept bringing it up?

“Grace.” Worth was striding toward her.

“Yes, sir?”

“You’re needed in the conference room. McBride is already there. We have a new communication from Devoted Fan.”

Her shoulders slumped with fatigue. Not another one. Hopefully there wouldn’t be another victim already.

She followed her SAC and, as if he’d smelled the trouble, Pierce wasn’t far behind her. Pratt, Davis, and Aldridge were there already, as was McBride. They gathered around the computer screen and read the latest email from the unsub who was now officially a serial offender.

McBride,

You truly are the best. You and your fine partner, Agent Grace, did a spectacular job of solving my puzzling clues. I am astounded at your greatness. As you know by now from the latest news reports,Dr. Trenton and his team have nearly reached the midway point in this complex surgery and all is going well.

The patient’s certain survival, as well as the good doctor’s, is solely your doing. I daresay, Trenton will have a new attitude from this day forth, as well he should.

The time has come for me to inform you that, at last, the final challenge is at hand. I do, of course, realize that you have had little rest, and I shall save the grand finale for tomorrow.

Rest well, my hero, for there is still one more lesson to be taught—this one is a lesson I am sure you will appreciate as much as I.