Page 37 of The Dating Prohibition
As Kendra pulled up to PALATE that evening, she was surprised to see BJ’s SUV parked out front. She knew he didn’t have plans
to help out that night, so she didn’t know why he was there, but she felt a flutter in her stomach at the opportunity to see
him. Maybe we’ll end up going home together.
BJ had a myriad of ways to keep her distracted, and the thought of him helping her clear her mind made her smile. She parked
the car and smoothed her hands over the front of her wide-legged slacks. She wore a fitted vest over them that showed her
arms, the V of the vest dropping to show off a generous amount of cleavage. Her layered gold necklaces rested on her sternum.
As she pulled open the door, her eyes widened at the sight of a familiar face standing at the hostess station. “Chase?” she
asked. What the hell is he doing here?
“Keke. Long time no see.” His lips curved as his gaze lingered on her chest.
“ Kendra ’s fine,” she corrected. “And honestly, not long enough in my opinion.”
He sighed. “You will forever be known as Keke to me.”
“Well, then, I guess that means you don’t know me anymore,” she retorted and moved to walk past. She could see BJ at the bar
chatting with Shonda. She caught his eye and headed in his direction until a hand gripped her arm.
“Don’t go away so fast. Don’t you want to catch up?” Chase pressed.
“For what purpose?” Her brow furrowed, turning back to him. It was a busy night in the restaurant. Most of the tables were
occupied, candlelight flickering from glass votives and twinkling lights lined the large windows. The room echoed with laughter
and conversation, which only irritated her further as she stared at his hand sliding to clutch her wrist.
“It’s quite a vibe in here,” he offered. “You should be really proud of your brother and sister-in-law.”
“And who said I’m not?” she retorted.
“I didn’t say that you’re not. I’m just saying...”
“Well, how about you don’t worry about what I should and shouldn’t be, okay? What is it that you want, Chase?”
His lips curled into the flirty smile that used to entice her. “You always did cut straight to the point.”
“I guess that’s one thing that hasn’t changed.”
“Don’t be like that, Keke.” His grip on her wrist softened.
She was trying her best not to recoil, but she was tempted to yank her arm away and storm off. She had no interest in discussing
whatever was on his mind, but she was trying her best not to make a scene.
“I actually came here to see you,” he admitted finally.
Kendra chewed on her lip, finally meeting his gaze.
His hazel and green eyes bore into hers, their curling lashes framing his stare. He pressed his lips together. “Can we talk
for real for a second?” He gestured outside to one of the patio tables, which were unoccupied.
“Listen, I’m not wearing a coat, so you have two minutes once we get outside,” she warned him.
“Uh-huh.” He held the door open for her.
Stepping outside into the spring air, a breeze ruffled her curls. She turned to face the restaurant, crossing her arms over
her chest. “Start talking.”
“You’re really in a rush, aren’t you?”
She sucked her teeth. “I’m not here to see you, so what do you want ?” she enunciated.
“Fine,” he sighed. “I was hoping, now that you’ve moved back to town, that maybe we could—”
Oh hell no. “Maybe we could what?” She quirked a brow, weary of how he was going to finish that sentence.
“Maybe we could, you know, figure out what went wrong and try again.”
Kendra narrowed her eyes at him. “Why? Has your memory failed you?”
“I think we need to investigate what happened.”
“Uh, we ain’t gotta investigate a damn thing. You put your dick in someone else so we ended.”
“Well, but, there’s always reasons for things that happen.”
“Look, that’s some shit you can investigate with your therapist. Why do I need to be a part of it?”
“Kendra.”
“What? There’s nothing to discuss.”
“It was a moment of weakness.”
“Okay. And what am I supposed to do with that?”
“You’re supposed to forgive me.”
Her jaw dropped at the audacity. “Was that a requirement? This level of audacity is wild.”
“It’s not a requirement, but that’s what I want.”
“Okay.” Kendra goaded. “Well, I wanted a faithful partner, so I guess we’re both out of luck.” She shrugged her shoulders.
“You always have to make things difficult.” He pinched the bridge of his nose.
“Was that all?” She turned toward the door, trying to escape the conversation that she didn’t care to have.
“No, I just... I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry for what happened. It shouldn’t have, and I’ll own that. But I still love you
and I really miss what we had.”
“Well, I think that you should have considered that before you did what you did, because actions have consequences.”
“They do, but you don’t have to keep punishing me.”
“Who’s punishing you? I just don’t want to be in that position with you again.”
“So you’re just gonna let it all go?”
“Why does this feel like you’re surprised? I already let it go and I’m not interested in exploring a new scenario with you.
I do not want to date you, to be your partner, to try again, to reconsider. I am done. We are done. We have been done for over five years.” She gestured between them. “Is it clear this time? Because I can create a diagram and a slide
deck, if you need it.”
“Okay, you don’t have to be so snarky.”
“Well, I don’t understand why you didn’t hear me the first time that we had this conversation.”
“But I was still reaching out to you because I didn’t feel like the conversation had ended. You just never responded.”
“I never responded because I blocked you. I had no idea that you were reaching out to me, because I didn’t want to hear from
you. Just accept it—you fumbled and now I’ve picked that ball up and I’m running far away from you.”
He huffed out a breath. “Fine. I hear you, but I hope that you reconsider.”
“Not gonna happen, and to be candid, I have feelings for someone else.”
His shoulders slumped at her admission. “Do I know him?”
“Does it matter?” she responded, her mouth forming a thin line.
“I guess it doesn’t. I’m sorry, K.” He leaned close to her and kissed her on the cheek.
Kendra’s eyes shot up and she watched BJ through the front window turn toward the kitchen. Her mouth went slack as she stepped
back from Chase.
“For whatever it’s worth, you look like you’re doing well. I hope you find someone who makes you happy.”
He nodded, a rueful smile playing on his lips. “I really wish that I had handled everything with you differently.”
“Lesson learned, Chase. Take care of yourself,” she said softly as she pulled the door open and went back inside, breathing
a sigh of relief when he didn’t follow her.
Kendra headed past the bar on her way to the kitchen to seek advice from Logan and BJ about the business proposal that was
brought to her attention, already putting the run-in with Chase out of her mind. “Hey, Shonda, how’s it going?”
“Good, how are you?” She looked at Kendra wearily.
“What’s the matter? What’s going on?” Kendra stepped closer, a knot building in the pit of her stomach.
Shonda swung a towel over her shoulder and took a beat. “Are you here to interrupt their conversation?”
Kendra blinked. “What conversation?”
“Your brother is asking BJ about his intentions.”
“What are you talking about, Shonda?” Kendra’s eyes narrowed as she tilted her head. “You told him.”
“Look, I didn’t mean to, it just kinda slipped.” Shonda held up her hands. “You have to remember that that’s my husband.”
“And since when is this any of his business, Shonda? I don’t need his permission.”
“You’re his sister and that’s his best friend.”
“And so, by extension, he gets to decide for us what happens? Did anybody decide for you?”
“You and I both know that someone tried to get in the way of us being together.”
So we’re back to this again. “Yet you’re together and married and happy, and while he may have initially had misgivings about his friend getting involved
with someone who was already involved with someone else, can you blame him? So when are you going to let that go, Shonda?
You know you had no right.”
Shonda bit her lip.
Kendra shook her head, blowing out a breath. “ Nothing in my life can be easy. Everything goes so smoothly for you guys. No one gets involved. But I can’t have anything to myself.”
She shook her head and stepped toward the kitchen.
“Keke...”
“It’s Kendra,” she snapped as she turned away. “I’m fine. We’re fine. Let this shit go.”
As she neared the kitchen door, she slowed as she heard Logan say, “So what are you gonna do about it?”
“Man, I don’t know. I’m in too deep and it shouldn’t have happened.”
“So, what are you saying, Ben?” Logan almost never referred to BJ as Ben.
“Listen, Logan. I definitely have feelings, but I just don’t think I should act on them. And that’s why from the beginning
I told her that she was off-limits. But... we just sort of fell into this, man, and it shouldn’t have happened.”
A stone fell into the pit of her stomach.
“You know how messed up I was when everything fell apart for me when Amber passed. It’s just not easy for me to feel ready to try again, you know?
Kenny’s out front right now, talking to Chase.
Like, what the fuck? I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but it seemed like he wanted to try to get back together with her, and if they’re not ready to completely call it quits, then she’s not actually ready for anything anyway. ”
Kendra’s heart dropped. How could he think I want Chase? She wanted to run into the room and throw her arms around him and tell him that she’d never leave, but she couldn’t shake
the fact that he wanted to walk away from her.
“Well, whatever the case, I can assure you that she’s not backtracking to be with that dude. Surely you see the way that she
looks at you.”
Ben ran a hand over his hair. “More important to me is my connection with all of you. You’re the only family I have left.
I can’t mess this up.”
And there it was. He had feelings, he just wasn’t ready for the risk. He told me and I didn’t listen to him. This isn’t about me. It’s about him.
She leaned her head back until it rested against the cool surface, wondering what it was that she was supposed to do. Her
heart and her mind stood at odds as the first tears fell.