Page 48 of The Comeback Road (Leaving #2)
Lexie
Jess stared at me with a look of matching shock. “I, uh…I think there’s been a grave miscalculation here,” she said. I almost wanted to laugh at her, but then I heard Raya’s squeal as she ran up the steps and leaped into the air, giving me almost zero time to catch her in my arms.
“Princess Lexie!” She wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug. I masked my wince as I was still sore from my wound, but I didn’t care. Raya’s hug seemed to start stitching pieces of me back together that I hadn’t even realized needed attention.
“Hey, kid. I missed you.” I looked Raya in her eyes, and they gleamed with mischief.
“Mom said you were on vacation, and it might be a while before you came back, but I always knew you’d come back!
” she prattled. I completely forgot Jess was next to me until Jace made his way toward the door, a huge smile on his face when he took in Raya.
But that quickly morphed into a frown when he realized Jess was there.
“Jess, what…what are you doing here?” Jace asked. He seemed almost annoyed at her presence, and I couldn’t help the small jolt of joy at that.
“I came with Remi.” She looked down, clearly uncomfortable with the current events. Raya chose that moment to chime in. “Jess lives in the extra room! Mom says it helps buy me all the chicken fries I want, so I like her.”
“A kid after my own heart, wooed by chicken fries.”
“The best kind of fries.” She put her hands on my cheeks and stared at me with such serious eyes that I couldn’t help but agree. Remi finally made her way up the stairs. Her arms held wrapped gifts, explaining her delay.
“I see you’ve met my roommate, Jess! This is Jace and—”
“We’ve met. Hey, listen, I think I’m going to take off.” Jess looked dejected, and it was a look I’d seen one too many times. I felt myself caving.
“It’s Christmas. You should come in,” I found myself saying, shocking even myself. I heard an annoyed grunt from behind me. Jess looked horrified at the sound, taking a step back as if rejecting my offer. I turned around to glare at Jace.
“Jace, that’s rude. It’s Christmas.”
His cheeks turned a bright red. “I just want you to have a good Christmas, Starlight…” Jace’s focus was entirely trained on me. I didn’t think he had spared Jess a single glance since he realized she was there. I felt a fluttering in my stomach at the way he was looking at me.
“And I wouldn’t if I knew someone was alone for it. Come on in, Jess.” With Raya on my hip, Jace as my own personal shadow, a confused Remi, and a very clearly regretting-her-life-decisions Jess, we made our way back into the house to start Christmas.
As we made our way to the kitchen, where the rest of the group was, Sloan dropped his spatula when he saw the group of us that filtered in.
Magnolia wore a look of confusion but reached for Raya when she made grab hands at her, and I handed her off while Dexter held a look of uncertainty at our stiffened postures.
“Okay…who died?”
Despite my best efforts, I found myself flinching at her words.
The darkness that seemed to dissipate in the comfort of my friends, who were becoming family, reared its ugly head.
Suddenly, the room felt too small. Everyone felt too close, and I felt like I couldn’t get the air into my lungs fast enough.
A soft touch pulled at me, and I felt arms pull me in, caging me in. They felt like the only things holding me together. “I got you, Starlight, I got you .” And for the first time, I felt like I could fall apart because he would hold me together.
“I got you. It’s okay.”
I sank to the floor, but the pressure around me never gave up, never let me go. It just held me.
I was unsure of how long we stayed there, on the floor, but it had to be a long time because my muscles ached from misuse, and I realized then that my fingers were clutched so tightly to Jace’s T-shirt they had turned almost purple.
“I, uh…I’m sorry,” I said weakly. I didn’t know what else to say.
“Don’t apologize to me,” his voice tickled my neck, and I found myself breaking out into goosebumps. “Do you want to talk about it?” Maybe. I looked up at him, about to tell him just that, when Luke came bursting through at that moment.
“Lex?” he bellowed, taking in the situation. He tried to pull me from Jace, but I just gripped Jace’s shirt tighter. I wanted to stay right there.
“I know you’ll probably kick my ass, man, but let her go now ,” Jace seethed. I felt the way his muscles tightened around me, and I buried my face closer into his chest.
Luke must have realized how I clung to Jace because he backed off almost immediately. “Lex…”
“Go away.”
“Lex…please, you have to understand,” he all but pleaded, flickers of agony bleeding through. “I can’t tell you. Just know we are working on it.”
“That’s not good enough.” I felt furious.
Absolute fury consumed me. “I killed someone to get exactly what we needed, and I wear his death around my neck every fucking day. Every day. I wonder if he had a wife, if he had kids, if it was just a job to him. But I could live with myself, knowing we saved people, knowing we made it out. How can you expect me to live with myself when we left Zed there? He has a family.” I didn’t scream, my words coming out in an anguished whisper, begging for understanding.
“Lexie, you would have died if I let you. You both could have died, and in that moment, I made a choice.”
“You chose wrong.” And I felt Jace’s arms tighten around me to the point where I was pretty sure I’d have bruises. I felt his entire body shaking at my admission of everything.
“No, I didn’t.” Luke turned on his heel and left the kitchen, and I realized we weren’t alone. Everyone stood, looking at me with a mixture of emotions.
Christmas and a show.