Page 18

I wasn’t one to be flanked by guards at all times when I left the house, but with time, I got used to their presence. In a way, they became a natural part of my routine, and luckily, they were good at what they did. They were quiet, and it helped me think.

Given the nature of what I was setting out to do by smoothing things over with old associates of my father’s, it didn’t hurt to have the extra manpower around me. Not only were they there if anything were to go south, but they also bolstered my credibility in a way. They helped to give me a level of importance, and I could tell the others felt it, too.

Despite the on-and-off rain, I carried out my meetings as intended, and Gabriel along with the Novikov guards never made a single complaint while we traveled around the city.

Gabriel’s quiet vigilance was a constant behind me, and that was enough to give me the reassurance I needed. That had been the case since day one, despite my reluctance to trust him at first.

Since he had worked for my father and brother before me, I assumed his loyalty would be solely with them, but fortunately, that wasn’t the case. He not only welcomed me into the position as the boss, but he also showed me some of the ropes and guided me through those rockier days.

And with whatever luck I had, he stuck around. He did everything I asked without hesitation, and when I asked for it, he gave me his advice.

All and all, he was an excellent right hand, and with those meetings looming ahead of me, I needed that support more than ever.

Admittedly, the first meeting was a dud.

It didn’t take long for me to know exactly how it would play out the moment I entered that room. The boss I went to see once had an alliance with my father, and apparently they had worked quite well together over the years, but of course, Esidor did what he was known for and burned it all down. Scorned the man so badly that he was half tempted to throw me out.

Of course, it was a familiar song and dance, like many others I experienced before. He saw me as a ‘generous’ favor, only to turn around and use whatever he could to try to take advantage of me and my hopes to rally support for not only my operation, but for the Novikov partnership as well.

After being laughed at to my face and told I had no place in their world, I decided I had enough and cut it short. Gabriel and the guards were attentive while we walked out, and fortunately, it didn’t escalate further than that.

With that slap in the face out of the way, we returned to the Range Rover and moved on to the next one. I hated how that rejection seemed to sting more than usual, especially given the pressure I had on myself to keep things clean for the sake of the arrangement.

I was used to being underestimated, but that didn’t make it any easier to bear some days.

“Don’t overthink it,” Gabriel reminded me while we moved through the city. He spared me a look. “The next one will be different, I can already tell.”

Letting out a breath to keep myself level, I nodded. I didn’t entirely believe his words, but I knew his heart was in the right place. I knew he just didn’t want me to lose faith in myself.

In a way, despite doing what I had been begging to return to, I was growing tired of the negotiations that seemed to go nowhere. Of the men assuming I was either just like my predecessors or that I would fare even worse just because I looked the way I did. Because I wasn’t a man myself.

I wanted to move out of that frustrating stage of my career, to feel the respect I was after without having to defend myself constantly. I wanted to prove I was just as capable, if not more.

By some higher power, the next meeting unfolded much differently.

Despite the slight doubt to begin with, there was also a hint of curiosity. The associate didn’t make me fight for recognition, and they were rather intrigued by the thought of working with someone adjacent to the Levovs and Novikovs.

Finally, some progress for the day.

It wasn’t anything set in stone, but it was enough to have me leaving that place feeling better than I did going in.

Neither Gabriel nor I said anything going back to the vehicle, but words weren’t needed. Even if it had been a small partial victory, it was enough to dissolve the tension looming over me, and we could both carry on with the day.

We continued, getting where we needed to go, finding small wins wherever we could, and by the end of it, I was tired of discussing deals and plans.

“Where are we off to now? Back to the house?” Gabriel asked while he slid into the seat on the other side.

Considering my options, I hummed. “Daniil said he’d be at the club on the South Side for a few hours to handle some things. It’s Friday—a visit couldn’t hurt, right?”

Gabriel seemed almost surprised by that, then chuckled and nodded, leaning forward to let the driver know. When he sat back down, he glanced at me. “You’re right about that. Some whiskey sounds nice right about now.”

“I think we’ve both earned it after today.”

Without any need to debate the idea, the ride continued as usual, and soon enough, the club came into view with its neon lights overhead.

Gabriel entered the busy place with me, but when I let him know I’d be all right by myself, he went off on his own, disappearing into the seemingly endless crowd.

Given that it was a Friday night, that wasn’t surprising at all. It was surely their busiest night of the week, and I had the feeling Daniil and the others would be beyond happy about that.

Music thrummed throughout the place while I navigated the dark hall on my own, finding the bar along the back wall, the main floor where most people were dancing, and the various seating areas off to the side.

I moved smoothly through the place, not exactly dressed like the typical clubgoer, but I didn’t stand out, either. The lights were bright and moved in time with the beat of the music, and while I wasn’t exactly there to party to the same degree, I was surprisingly looking forward to seeing Daniil again, and allowed myself to unwind a bit anyway.

With business done for the day, I didn’t need to be quite so uptight or focused.

While I waded through the crowd, keeping my eyes peeled for Daniil, I found myself growing more contemplative about where we were as partners and associates as of late—not to mention as a married couple.

Ever since we came to our newest agreement, we hadn’t talked about much other than business. While those conversations were much easier to have than before, they left me questioning what was between us, wondering if that was all we’d ever be, or if there was room for hope—hope for more.

We were on the same side, and making strides when it came to tolerating each other, yet there was still a sort of distance between us. A hesitance.

Shaking those thoughts off, I tried to focus on finding him instead. There was no point in getting ahead of myself if I couldn’t even locate him in the club.

Finally, reaching the back of the club that led to their back rooms meant for meetings and whatever else, I saw him standing there with his back to me.

But the faintest knot formed in my stomach when I noticed the woman he was speaking with.

She was obviously a dancer at the club, given how she was hardly dressed at all with that lingerie set hugging her curves. She looked up at him with a smile and a gleam in her eyes that made the knot tighten even more.

I couldn’t see his face or how receptive he was, but she leaned in to say something in his ear with a hand on his arm.

Despite myself, the slow, almost pensive path her fingers made up his bicep, ghosting just beneath the sleeve of his tee, flared a fit of jealousy in me I hadn’t felt in years for anyone—anything.

Those confused feelings ate away at my insides, feeling like I both had no right and simultaneously every right to be boiling at the sight.

He was technically my husband, and it wasn’t like we hadn’t already had sex before, even if the emotional part of our connection didn’t quite line up as one would expect for a married couple.

Either way, I couldn’t get rid of the nagging thought that something wasn’t right. She was being too familiar with him, as if it was the most natural thing, and I didn’t like the ideas that sprang to my mind because of it.

He hadn’t touched me ever since that time in the car, which had been some time ago. And if I knew anything about men, it was that they were usually always considering when they could get it in again. If he hadn’t been with me, then…

Those gnawing thoughts were too much, and at once, I couldn’t stand to watch it anymore.

Turning away, my entire body was tight with anger, I moved over to the bar, slid onto a stool, and pulled a smile for the bartender.

He was built with a leaner physique than Daniil’s, and his hair was cropped much shorter, yet was just as dark. His eyes were kinder, well used to dealing with customers all of kinds. His returned smile seemed like a standard customer service one, but I didn’t miss the faint intrigue that flickered in his gaze.

Leaning a bit closer to the bar, I ordered a drink, laying it on a bit thicker than usual.

When he nodded and got to it, I caught sight of Gabriel down the bar from me while he nursed his whiskey, seeming almost confused but not moving from his seat.

Choosing to ignore him, I focused on the pretty bartender, eventually taking the glass from him and allowing my fingers to graze his through the exchange.

“Thank you,” I hummed sweetly, loud enough for him to catch it despite the noise.

The bartender smiled back at me, seemingly lingering for a moment longer than necessary, as if searching for whatever he wanted to say to me.

I didn’t need to look down the bar to know Gabriel was likely wearing a questioning expression, more lost than ever about what I was doing, or why I wasn’t with Daniil like I said I would be.

It was a petty move on my part, but in that moment while that jealousy made me feel somewhat wild and irrational, I didn’t care.

If Daniil was sleeping with other people—dancers and employees of his family’s business—then what was the harm in flirting with the unassuming bartender?

Getting even by making a scene was beneath me. Even I wasn’t going to stoop that low. Instead, I wanted to make Daniil feel something. Jealousy and irrational anger.

While sipping my drink, I glanced over my shoulder to find him still standing there with the dancer while she talked to him, proceeding to act like she was the only person in the room.

Everything about it pushed my anger up to a ten, but I tempered it as best as I could, responding once the bartender asked me how my night was going.

I was playing with fire by leaning into that flirtation, but for a brief moment, it felt good. It gave me a subtle hint of control, even if he wasn’t the one I wanted to be flirting with. It had nothing to do with the bartender, and everything to do with despising how Daniil’s attention was elsewhere despite myself.

It was a stupid, stupid game, but a game nonetheless.