Page 2

Charlotte

Present

“ I wasn’t looking at him!” I shout, frustrated, as my boyfriend drags me out of the bar by my arm.

“I saw you! I’m not stupid, Charlotte. Get in the fucking car!” He shoves me into the passenger seat of his Dodge Charger and slams the door shut, nearly catching my leg in the doorframe.

We speed away, tires screeching, leaving me embarrassed by yet another one of Jason’s public outburst. He drew everyone's attention, making a scene and accusing me of wanting another man. His jealousy and anger keep getting worse. I’m afraid to even look at my surroundings when we’ re out in public, worried he might think I'm checking out another guy.

Unfortunately, I know this argument won’t end here. I dread getting home where he’ll take out his jealousy and anger on my body. Bruises from our last fight still cover my arms and torso.

“Jason, please. I’m sorry, okay?” I try to de-escalate the situation, even though I know it hardly ever works.

“You embarrassed me again!”

I embarrassed him? Unbelievable.

“I'm sorry. I love you.” I reach for his hand, but he swings it up and backhands me across the face.

I bite my lip, suppressing my tears. The rest of the drive is quiet as I mentally prepare myself for what’s coming.

I sit on the floor of the shower, curled up, tears mixing with the stream of water falling down my face.

My ribs throb where Jason kicked me, and my split lip burns.

I don't know how I got myself into this situation. I never thought I would be one of these people. Someone whose boyfriend beats them, controls them, abuses them in every way.

I never saw it coming.

I used to fight back, try to hold my own. But he’s a grown-ass man. Much taller and stronger than me. I never stood a chance.

Sure, maybe I could have walked away when it first happened, but as they say, I was blinded by love .

I believed his apologies and his promises, and even worse, I believed it was my fault for provoking him. Men like him are good at that. Good at twisting your mind, convincing you that you’re the problem and then before you know it, you're handing over complete control. By then, it’s too late. So here I am, years later, with broken bones, hundreds of bruises, and a bunch of spilled blood.

I’m still here.

I’m not in love with Jason anymore, but I can't leave him. He still claims to love me, but that has to be one of the biggest jokes I have ever heard. How can you love someone yet do what he does? This isn’t love. This is control and possession. He owns me. I’m his and he won’t let anyone else have me or let me go. His ego and twisted mind won't allow it and I wouldn’t survive it. He has made that very clear.

I'm trapped.

Jason’s father is rich. They’ll paint me as a scorned ex trying to go after their money. Jason has already hinted at the story they would spin and the risk of going up against both of them is not one I'm willing to take. Maybe that makes me weak, but at least I’ll be alive. That’s until Jason accidentally goes too far one day. I live in fear with that truth, knowing every fight could be my last day I spend breathing. I’m gambling with my life, hoping that maybe he won't cross that line, maybe this is just a phase.

There’s only one person who knows about the abuse, my best friend since elementary school, Lily. She’s threatened to beat his ass more times than I can count. She hates him with a passion, and I sometimes feel like she might even hate him more than I do.

Lily has been an amazing friend. Through my dad’s multiple relapses and my relationship with Jason, she’s always been there for me, offering her support during the difficult times. She’s more like a sister to me, and I just hate seeing the look on her face every time she sees a new bruise on me.

She’s stopped asking what happened and I’m glad for it. Reliving the moment is not something I like to do. She has also stopped trying to convince me to leave him. I don't believe she’s just given up because I see the worry in her eyes every time I see her, but I think it breaks her heart every time she tries and fails. I love her so much; I'm missing her terribly right now.

We lived together until Jason insisted I move in with him. It was simply just another way to isolate me and have me all to himself. I’ve been living with him for about two years now, although you would hardly be able to tell. Everything in this house is his; something he likes to remind me of often.

I have my clothes and toiletries, but that’s about it. Not a single piece of decor is mine. Not even a damn house plant.

This home feels so… cold and empty. Pretty much how I’ve come to feel on the inside as well.

I miss the condo with Lily. That felt like home. This feels more like a prison, I suppose because it technically is.

Three loud bangs come from the other side of the bathroom door.

“Hurry up. Come to bed,” Jason shouts through the door.

Sighing, I finish washing up before crawling into the queen size bed beside him. I lie on my back and stare at the ceiling fan as he begins to squeeze my breasts and rub a thumb over my nipple.

“I’m sorry about tonight, babe. You just make me so mad sometimes. I'm crazy about you and I’m just so damn afraid to lose you,” he whispers, then kisses my shoulder.

It’s nothing I haven't heard before. I don't respond, I don’t even move as he continues his hard trail of kisses. He moves between my legs, strokes himself with a palm of lube, and slides into me. I continue staring at the fan, trying to focus on one blade spinning round and round.

“You know you're mine, right? Tell me you’re mine forever, Charlotte,” he requests, panting, as he slowly moves in me .

The calm before the storm.

“I’m yours forever.”

“That’s my girl.” And with that, he begins his ruthless pounding. He can’t do gentle. It's not in him and maybe if it was anyone else, I could enjoy the rough sex, but with him, it’s just another violent assault against my most intimate area as he claims me.

At least he doesn't last very long.

When he’s finished, he rolls over and falls asleep with his dick still wet. I quietly go to the bathroom to wash away his essence as much as I can.