Page 28 of The Beast’s Unwanted Duchess (Icy Dukes #1)

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

" I f I hear any unnecessary comments from either of you directed at my wife in the future, I can assure you I won’t hesitate to make sure you regret it."

Alice screamed into her pillow as she recalled Victor's parting words to her parents.

She had been on her way to apologize for leaving as she had when she overheard him, and her heart had warmed when she heard his attempt to protect her from suffering the sure backlash from the disastrous dinner.

Her parents would have no doubt found a way to blame her for being dramatic.

She had hidden in a corridor when she heard him approach and only emerged after her parents had gone up to their chambers before returning to hers.

She had spent a better part of the night avoiding him, as she had yet to forgive him for saying their kiss was nothing more than a mistake.

But there was no way she could continue being angry at him, not when he had defended her as he had.

He had no reason to, yet he had done what no one else had done for her.

She had changed into a nightgown and was brushing her hair, but she knew sleep wouldn’t come if she didn’t thank him. But how could she go to his chambers so late?

"No," she said out loud to herself, willing her body to behave.

A knock on her door pulled her out of her thoughts.

"Enter," she called out.

"Your Grace." Roberts bowed.

"Is anything the matter?" she asked, surprised to see him so late in her chambers.

"Your parents have asked me to inform you that they will be departing, come morning, to their estate."

Oh.

"Very well. I shall try to see them before they do. Is there anything else I should know?"

"Not at the moment, Your Grace," he answered. "Have a good night."

She giggled as soon as the door was closed, flinging herself onto her bed rather undignifiedly. It wasn’t filial of her to find delight in her parents’ discomfort, but she couldn’t deny the pleasure of seeing them on the receiving end of their own medicine.

Turning to her side, she was haunted by the memory of him warning her parents and had lain there, unable to sleep. The scream of frustration into her pillow was the motivation she needed to get out of bed, don a robe, and look for his chamber.

Ignoring a look from the maid she had asked to lead her there, she mentally prepared her speech, but all that was in vain the second she stepped into the room. The sight of him in a less-than-societally presentable state had her wishing she had waited until breakfast to speak to him.

Victor clearing his throat was the thing she needed to remember what she had come for.

"Why did you leave on our wedding night?"

Alice watched emotions flitter quickly across Victor’s face, and she couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps she should have buried the question deep in her thoughts.

She had come only to thank him for defending her against her parents but had only been met with surprises at every turn.

The first being his exposed chest through his partially unbuttoned shirt.

Even as she looked him over now, she couldn’t help but swallow deeply at the sight of the light brown hair dusting his chest.

He was so visibly male that she felt small standing before him. She had realized, too late, her mistake of being dressed in only her nightgown and robe. Thankfully, it was of a thick material and cut in such a manner as to cover rather than seduce.

Then, she had been surprised by the scars still visible on his chest and wondered about their extent.

He had told her how he had gotten them, and she pitied the boy he had been.

They shared similar mental scars of not being good enough in their fathers' eyes, and while she had resented hers, she resented the late duke who had wrought so much pain in Victor.

"Why do you ask now?" he asked once he overcame his surprise.

She shrugged, stepping away from the door.

"It seems the perfect time to ask," she answered him. "I have spent many nights wondering."

"We do not have to discuss it," he tried to dismiss her. "It has been two years."

"That is precisely why we must," she answered stubbornly. "We have been married for two years, yet we haven’t consummated our marriage. I used to blame myself but considering you’re not one to lie, I believed you when you told my parents that you were satisfied with me."

"I am satisfied with you."

"Yet the topic of consummating our marriage burdens you."

"It has nothing to do with you. I can assure you of that."

"Then what is it, Victor?" she asked irritably.

"You cannot just leave things at that. If you are not put off by my inadequacies, then why would you just leave? I am not asking just because we didn’t consummate the marriage.

I am asking for every other reason. Companionship. Friendship. I have a right to know."

He sighed and began to pace, running a hand through his hair.

"Can we not discuss this when I am better prepared for the conversation?"

"There is no better time than the present."

"You are a very stubborn woman," he muttered.

She shrugged, not minding the characterization.

He had confused her by saying what he had to her parents even after telling her he had only married her for his inheritance and calling their kiss a mistake so she couldn’t leave things peacefully.

Her conscience would never permit her a moment's rest if she didn’t seize the opportunity to get answers.

"I thought it was what was best for both of us." He answered.

She hadn’t truly expected him to answer, so when he started, it was almost too hard to hide her surprise. It took everything in her to school her expression so he wouldn’t stop.

"I thought you were trying to throw yourself out of the window when I walked into your chambers and I panicked. I couldn’t have your death on my hands."

"That is why you left?" she asked incredulously. "I would never… I’m sorry you felt that way."

"It was a match you obviously didn’t want, and I could understand that considering the rumors around me," he answered.

"You were too scared to look me in the eye on our wedding day and you had been so startled when our hands touched in the carriage.

Anyone would have thought the same thing.

I mean no one I know sits on the windowsill. "

"You do not know that many people," she teased, smiling.

"It matters not," he returned her attempt at playful conversation. "It is a rather odd habit. I find you have a number of dangerous hobbies."

"Just because you’re afraid doesn’t mean they are dangerous hobbies."

"I assure you I am not alone in my thoughts on the subject, Alice."

She couldn’t deny that hearing her name on his lips in such a playful tone set weird butterflies fluttering about in her belly. She had once thought her name too feminine for her and not at all fitting, but each time he pronounced it, she found herself liking it a little bit more.

"Oh?" she asked playfully. "Do you discuss my habits with others?"

He looked like she had exposed a secret of his, and she laughed softly at his expression. He almost looked boyish, unlike the serious duke everyone saw him as.

"Not particularly," he answered when he had recovered.

"I only hope you say good things." She smiled.

"I cannot promise that."

"Well." She pouted. "I will just have to correct the narrative when I meet them."

"If you meet them."

"If you say so, Your Grace." She nodded. "I do hope you do not still perceive that I would hurt myself to escape marriage to you?"

She needed to ask the question before the vulnerable air that had settled over them dissipated.

"I do not," he answered. "I now know you will not hurt yourself to escape marriage to me."

She smiled and nodded triumphantly.

"I am glad you have come to know that," she told him.

They settled into a companionable silence, and she found she was in no hurry to leave. However, she didn’t want to overstay her welcome and push him too quickly behind his walls. If he wanted her to stay, all he would have to do was ask.

"I had best be returning to my chambers," she smiled at him. "I will see you at breakfast tomorrow?"

She had said it as a question, not wanting to scare him off. She knew he was quick to erect walls between them each time they took a step closer to each other. Her heart beat in anticipation of his reply, her breath hitching in her chest.

"I am glad to see I have influenced such a positive change in you." He nodded.

"Do not take all the credit. Roberts had already advised me on the matter."

"Yet it took me threatening you for you to make the change," he said smugly.

"And I am thankful for it." She smiled. "I have more energy for my day-to-day tasks."

He smiled then, startling her and apparently himself as he struggled to hide it.

"Thank you, Victor," she added, turning to the door.

"Alice…" he called.

"Yes?"

She turned and was surprised to see how close he had come to her.

His sandalwood and male scent filled her senses, and she couldn’t help but breathe deeply.

Her body went through a change that startled her.

Her heart beat rapidly in her chest, and her lips grew dry, so she had to swipe her tongue over them.

His eyes followed the movement, and she noticed his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed. She briefly wondered if he was going to kiss her.

"Did you want to ask me something?" she asked.

She saw his eyes return to the present, and a mask quickly fall into place. She was almost sorry to have broken whatever mood had fallen over them.

"I wanted to wish you a good night’s rest," he told her, meeting her eyes.

"Thank you," she answered. "Do sleep well."

He nodded, and she left the room quickly, stopping after turning into the next hallway to catch her breath. She placed a hand on her chest and was surprised she hadn’t fainted from how fast her heart beat in her chest.

She hadn’t imagined that look on his face. He had looked at her like that in the orangery just before he kissed her. And even though he had rejected her then after the kiss, she realized she had wanted him to kiss her.

Her lips tingled, reminding her of the last time they had kissed and the sparks that burned between them with each movement of his lips. His arms had held her so tightly, yet she had trusted him not to hurt her.

She had always trusted him, she realized. Even on their wedding day, she had known deep down he was nothing like the rumors said and even though she had a general distrust of people, she wouldn’t have dreamed of doing what he had feared.

Lying in bed later that night, she couldn’t help but smile as she replayed their interactions in her head. No one would believe her if they didn’t see it for themselves.

He had looked handsome as they had teased one another, and not as severe as he usually did. She imagined how differently they could both live if only he would completely tear down the walls he had erected between them.

The aching loneliness she usually felt had disappeared, and she barely felt the melancholy that haunted her after her parents berated her.

She couldn’t deny it any longer. Not to herself. She had somehow fallen for her husband without knowing it, and she worried her lip, knowing that come morning, he could be an entirely different man than the one she had conversed with that night.

She could only pray he would finally stop fearing the hurt that would come with leaving his heart open.