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WINTER

“You are staring at him again,” Crystal nudges my arm, trying to pull me out of the daze I’ve been in for the past hour.

The warmth of the sun coupled with the intense heat today isn’t the only thing making my cheeks red. The men in our pack are training right in front of us as per the custom of our pack. My eyes, however, have been stuck on one man.

I’m drawn like a moth to a flame at how his broad shoulders and biceps strain against his dark shirt and how his jet-black hair falls messily on his forehead.His jaw, which looks like it was sculpted by the Goddess herself, is locked and loaded as he focuses on the opponent he’s sparring against.

Another blush creeps up my neck, and Crystal chuckles.

Deacon Cross is the only man I see. He is the only man I have breathed since I learned what love is, and sadly, he’s my brother’s hot best friend who sees me as his little sister.

“I can’t help it, Crys. He’s so handsome,” I sigh dreamily.

“But he’s also older than you by a lot. Jake would kill you if he knew you were crushing on his best friend.”

Deacon isn’t older than me by a lot. Not if you count seven years as a lot, and while my brother is sometimes protective of me, I don’t think anything or anyone would separate me and Deacon if we were to somehow end up as destined mates.

“It’s not just a hopeless crush, Crystal. How do I explain it? I think we are meant for each other.”

I can feel it in my bones.

I want to believe that the Goddess has been listening to my prayers, too.

“You mean like what? Mates? Winter, I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but Deacon is the Alpha’s son. That title comes with power. His Luna is going to be as powerful as he is.”

I’m about to tell Crystal I’ll be powerful in the future, too, but my words die down the minute my brother locks eyes with me.

His opponent, who happens to be Deacon, follows my brother’s line of sight, and dark-brown eyes fall on me, taking all the breath from my lungs.

Deacon is looking at me.

Goddess, the intensity of his stare makes my legs weak.

Maybe that’s one of the reasons why I don’t see my furious brother headed toward me in long and brisk strides.

“Winter,” Jacob’s voice pulls me out of my trance. Running his hand through his hair like I exhaust him, he asks, “What are you doing here?”

“I—I wanted to see how your training is going.”

I’ve always been a terrible liar, and my brother knows it.

“You and Crystal are not supposed to be anywhere near the training grounds. Do Mom and Dad know you are here?”

I hate it when he uses that tone—like I’m a child.

“I’m eighteen, Jake. I’m not a kid, and I think I have all the rights to go anywhere I want.”

Crystal pulls me by my shoulders, shooting a nervous chuckle at my brother.

“We were just leaving.”

I cast another glance at Deacon, who has already moved on from staring at me and is now sparring with another guy I recognize as a beta.

“You can’t be serious, Winter,” Jake scoffs.

I turn my gaze to him, confused. What?”

“You are still infatuated with Deacon? And you say you are not a kid?”

“What if I am? Infatuated with Deacon, I mean?” I’m more than infatuated. I’ve been in love with him since I first saw him.

“Go home. Right now, Winter.”

“I like Deacon, Jake. We could be— “

“Could be what? Goddess, Winter! You are eighteen. You have no wolf, no sense of direction, and he’s the Alpha’s son. He’ll lead the pack one day, and you think you’ll be by his side when he does that? You are too young for him. You are too weak for him, and this crush you’ve got for Deacon will end in one way—you hurt. I’m only trying to protect you, Win.”

He means well. I know he does. But that doesn’t stop the tears that spring from my eyes and burn the back of my throat.

“Maybe I don’t need protection. Maybe I’m sick of you, Dad, and Mom coddling me like I don’t know what I want.”

I sound like a petulant child.

“Go home. We’ll talk about this when I get home.”

It’s Jake’s final word or nothing.

I blink away tears, turn around, and leave with my best friend in tow.

A few minutes later, Crystal has looked at me with piteous eyes, and I hated it.

“Winter I— “

“I’m going to take a short walk. Thanks for today.”

The short walk turns into a run. The tears I had held back from my talk with Jake came flowing down my cheeks like water from a broken dam. I swipe away the branches blocking my way while every sound on my feet makes echoes in the silent woods.

I don’t know how long I’ve been running, but everything comes to a standstill when pain shoots from the base of my spine, climbing up my limbs and paralyzing my entire body. I try to breathe, but that only makes the burn in my lungs turn fiercer and more painful.

The pounding in my chest brings me to my knees as the word “help” rests on my tongue and tries to fight its way out of my lips. Every thought in my mind jumps into the possibility that I might be dying. That would explain my complete loss of strength and the pain that gnaws my body like the fury of the Goddess herself.

“Winter.” A voice in my head calls out. It’s a voice that sounds like me but, at the same time, doesn’t feel like me.

“Let me in.”

The voice continues, and the realization of what is happening almost knocks the remaining air from my throbbing lungs. The voice, is it my wolf?

Jake said it would hurt the first time I felt my wolf, but I didn’t imagine it would hurt this much. He also said I would hear her talk to me when the time was right, but the feeling of listening to my wolf doesn’t compare to anything I’ve experienced in my entire life.

My hands slap the ground, and pain shoots through every muscle in my body. I look at the skies and let my wolf in.

The pain surges up through my limbs, wrapping around my bones as I change. Fur, the same shade as my hair, sprouts from my arms and legs, and in no time, my paws are sinking into the chilled grass.

I breathe in like I’m tasting how air feels for the first time, and everything feels different. Every sound from the woods crashes into my ears, and the urge to run while in my wolf form overwhelms me.

I run until I can barely hear the sound of my wolf howling. When the adrenaline rush wears off and my wolf decides that’s enough for the night, I shift back to my human form. The pain is nowhere as crippling as before.

My hands tremble against the grass, and the smile on my face wobbles as I try to keep up with what has just happened.

I’ve barely gathered enough strength to stand up when Deacon’s voice hits me out of nowhere.

“Winter.”

His voice is deep and gritty, thick and dark like rich melted chocolate.

I raise my head, my eyes meeting his dark, onyx ones.

He’s real? He’s even more than real. A gasp wrenches out of me when he takes off his shirt, kneels in front of me, and puts it on my shoulders, urging me to wear it. I didn’t even think about the fact that my clothes might have ripped away the minute I shifted into my wolf.

“You just got your wolf. It might take a second for you to adjust.”

How is he here?

“Okay.”

“Anything hurt?”

“No. Yes? Maybe…a little. Everything…smells different. You smell different.”

He smells familiar.

“Come on. I’ll take you home. Jake must be worried to death.”

“You...you followed me?”

A small smile tugs at his lips, and it makes the butterflies in my stomach flutter crazily.

“You looked upset. Jake would have wanted me to make sure you were alright. Come on, I’ll help you up.”

My heart breaks a little. He followed me to make sure his best friend’s little sister didn’t get into trouble.

I’m naked with only his shirt acting as some sort of cover, and not once has it affected him. Meanwhile, my eyes can’t stop raking every muscle on his naked chest.

I take Deacon’s hand begrudgingly.

The touch of the skin on his calloused hand sends tingles all across my body. My heart thumps. I can almost feel the blood roaring in my veins. It’s like I have found something that I’ve been missing my entire life. It’s as if I’ve been living without knowing how complete a person should be my entire life.

“Winter,” Deacon’s blazing eyes dig into mine, and I take a step away, this unsettling and newfound feeling slipping deep inside me till my wolf can feel it.

“Mate,” my wolf growls with such heated desire that it confirms what I felt a few minutes ago wasn’t a figment of my imagination.

“We are fated,” I whisper, and the words, together with the realization, only heighten the desire growing inside me like an unwanted weed.

“It’s getting late,” Deacon tries to divert my words, but the look on his face tells it all.

In our pack, once a member turns eighteen and gets their wolf, they are able to tell who their mate is, whether or not their partners know it as well. Does that mean Deacon knew I was his mate when he got his wolf, too?

Why did he not tell me? Because I was still young? Because he was afraid of telling his best friend’s little sister they were mated?

“We are mates,” my wolf repeats, this time more determined to make sure I hear her.

“You are my mate, and I am yours. We are destined to be together,” I try to insist, even though the look on Deacon’s face tells me he’s not going to give in to the bond that’s getting stronger and stronger every minute we stand like this.

“You are still recovering from shifting. You are confused, Winter, and I need to take you home.”

“Stop…stop lying to me. My wolf and I feel it, which means you feel it, too. Did you know? How long have you known?”

I’m met with silence.

The critters of the night chirp away. A distant howl breaks the air, and the man I’ve loved since forever stands before me. No, he looks at me, and he lies to me even more.

“We are not mates, Winter.”

The denial in his voice cuts me, but the happiness booming in my chest rivals his words.

I can feel my wolf getting angry and scared at the same time.

“Did you not tell me because of Jake? Because if that’s the case, you shouldn’t be worried about him. I love you, Deacon. I have loved you since the day we first met. I’ve always felt a connection with you, even before I got my wolf. “

Deacon takes a step back, as if he’s repulsed by the thought of us being mates. The action itself makes my heart almost crack into two halves.

“You are young, Winter. Young people fall out of love all the time.”

How dare he put my age as an excuse not to yield to our bond?

“You think I’ll fall out of love with you? Especially now that I know we are mates?”

“I think you are the same little girl who’s been following me, hoping I’ll give her a little attention and right now, she can’t seem to understand that we are not what she wants us to be.”

Everything inside me rages to turn around, find a way out of here, and never think of Deacon again. If this is the man I fell in love with, I would rather fall out of love. The other part of me, which is controlled by my wolf, begs me to stay and convince this man I’m his rightful mate.

I can hear my wolf beg me not to leave and not to let Deacon’s words hurt us, even though all his words have done is break us.

I close the space between us, standing in front of him so that our eyes can meet, and he has no choice but to see me and listen to me.

“Then, look me in the eye and reject me, Deacon. If you think I’m still a little girl you don’t want as your mate, reject me and my wolf so we can move on to a guy who’ll actually care about our bond.”

‘Don’t reject us.’

My wolf howls inside of me like it’s her biggest fear. I’m in the same boat because if our mate rejects us, I don’t think we could ever recover.

Deacon holds my chin, and it trembles the minute we lock eyes.

Hot, betraying tears stream down my cheeks as I await his answer, and in the anticipation of it all, I can hear my wolf calling to him the way a siren lures men to their deaths. I can feel her vulnerability in my tears, too.

I expect Deacon to tell me I should start walking home.

What I don’t expect?

I don’t expect him to lick my tears and whisper, “I’m so sorry, baby.”

And I most especially don’t expect him to smash his lips with mine.