Page 33 of The Almost Bride

Luna surveyed the contents of the bakery shelves dismally. Not that there weren’t some great options. She just didn’t seem to have much of an appetite of late. Miguel and Jason were working behind the counter, laughing with the last of the customers, Jason kneading dough for the next morning’s fresh bread.

She felt stuck in place. Like she was super-glued down, or as if time had slowed for her alone.

Mia.

Her name was a constant whisper in Luna’s mind. Ever since Luna had let herself acknowledge the truth, she loved her. Loved her in a way that was terrifying and exhilarating all at once. Loved her in a way that made her uncharacteristically unsure.

Would it be right to disrupt Mia’s return to her old life?

Even if she found the courage to do that, was it all too late?

She rubbed her nose, still staring at the sandwiches on the shelves. Maybe Mia was gone already. Maybe she’d already left town and disappeared. Luna just couldn’t bring herself to call. She didn’t want to have that conversation by phone. And she couldn’t face going up to the hotel just for Rachel to tell her that it was all over.

“You alright?”

Jason’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts. She blinked up at him, startled.

“Yeah.”

“You’re looking at those sandwiches like one of them ran over your cat.”

She gave him a weak smile. “Just… thinking.”

He studied her for a bear, then nodded. “About Mia?”

She didn’t answer right away, but then, what was the point in denying it? She sighed. “Have you seen her?”

“Not for days,”

Jason said, giving her a sympathetic look. “She used to come in and collect the rolls for the hotel. But Rachel’s been doing it recently.”

Luna’s stomach twisted. She forced a smile. “Thanks.”

He hesitated for a second. “If you want to talk…”

“I’m good.”

She rubbed her nose again. “Just not very hungry right now.”

She wasn’t hungry, and she wasn’t alright. But talking wasn’t solving anything. She needed answers. Answers that she was slightly afraid of getting.

She left the bakery and made her way across the road, the evening tourist traffic weaving around her as though nothing had changed. Everything had changed for her. Or was changing, she wasn’t sure which.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed open the door of the coffee shop, the bell jingling overhead.

“We’re closed,”

Helen said. Then she looked up from cleaning the espresso machine and saw Luna, her expression softening. “Ah, it’s you. I think I can make an exception for you. The machine’s off, but I’ve still got some filter and drip coffee. What do you need?”

Luna tapped her finger on the counter. “Um, not coffee actually.”

“You’re probably in the wrong place then, given that this is a coffee shop,”

Helen grinned.

“Yeah, right. Um, I was just wondering, has Mia been in lately?”

Helen raised an eyebrow and wiped her hands on a dishcloth before puffing out a breath. “No,”

she said finally, regretfully even. “She usually comes in around lunch for her cinnamon latte, but I’ve got to say that I haven’t seen her for a few days now.”

Another dead end. Another clue that Mia must have gone. Luna swallowed and managed a small smile. “Thanks,”

she said, before leaving, feeling Helen’s sad eyes watch her go.

She went out into the hot, sticky evening. Even the weather felt suffocating, the air heavy and muggy.

Mia hadn’t been in the bakery. She hadn’t been to Helen’s. Luna felt the weight of it settle over her. Mia must have left town altogether.

She slumped onto a bench, unsure of just what the hell she was supposed to be doing now.

Sam stepped out of the bookshop, rubbing his hands together before beginning to move the big boxes of second-hand books back into the shop in preparation for closing. On his second trip, he noticed Luna.

“Don’t feel like you have to lug a box or two around,”

he said cheerfully.

Luna looked up. “It’s your shop, they’re your books,”

she pointed out.

Sam pulled a face and came over to sit next to her. “Luna Truman being grumpy? I never thought I’d see the day.”

Luna stuck her tongue out at him.

“Got something on your mind?” he asked.

She huffed a laugh. “That obvious?”

He slung an arm over the back of the bench. “Want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” she said.

He squinted. “Can I guess then?”

“If you want.”

“Mia.”

She sighed. “Yes. How did you know?”

“Because I saw her around here just the other night, last night, even. She was moping around just like you are.”

Luna’s pulse spiked. “Was she… alone?”

A small smile tugged at Sam’s lips. “Yeah. Alone.”

Relief and fear warred inside her and she felt her stomach rumble with something that might have been hunger. So Mia hadn’t left. At least as of last night. And she was moping around. Was it possible that Mia was feeling the exact same way that she was?

Luna muttered her thanks to Sam and stood up. That was one problem out of the way.

Which only left about a hundred other problems to deal with before she could decide whether or not to expose her heart.

SHE WENT HOME, there was nothing she could do tonight, she decided. And when she got to the house, the lights were on and, for once, it looked almost cozy. She let herself in, brain still busy trying to work everything out, trying to decide just what to do.

“Luna?”

called her grandmother.

And she didn’t even have the energy to make a joke. She just kicked off her shoes and went into the sitting room where her grandmother was reading.

Evelyn looked up when Luna walked in. “You look restless,”

she observed.

Luna exhaled and sank onto one of the hard couches. “I don’t know what to do.”

For a moment, her grandmother studied her, then she closed her book quietly. “I’m assuming this has nothing to do with your new career.”

“No.”

Evelyn said nothing, waiting.

Finally, Luna sighed. “I’m in love with Mia.”

A flicker of something crossed Evelyn’s face. “And?”

“And… She had a whole life before me. A life that she can return to. I don’t know whether I’m supposed to disrupt everything and go and tell her that I love her, or if I’m supposed to let her go and be happy,”

Luna said, suddenly letting everything go. Then she clamped her mouth shut, shocked that she’d said so much in front of her grandmother.

Evelyn put her book to one side. “I’ve been thinking. I think part of the reason I wanted you to stay wasn’t just about responsibility. It was about keeping you safe.”

“Keeping me safe?”

Luna asked, surprised.

Her grandmother got up and went to the sideboard, turning her back as she poured them both a small drink. “I lost my husband,”

she said, back still turned. “I lost my daughter.”

There was a shake in her voice that Luna didn’t like. “You were all I had left.”

Luna swallowed. “I didn’t…”

she began, but she didn’t know how to finish that sentence. Didn’t know how to respond to a grandmother with actual feelings.

But when Evelyn turned back around, her face was as unreadable as ever, her hands steady as she handed a drink to Luna and then sat back down. “Maybe I went about things the wrong way with you.”

Luna bit her lip and looked into the dark amber liquid in her glass.

“I wasn’t raised to speak about my feelings,”

Evelyn said. “And I’m not about to start now.”

This made Luna look up and smile slightly. “Why does that not surprise me?”

“But I will say something,”

said Evelyn. She took a thoughtful breath. “Losing someone is the worst pain that there is. It’s like losing a piece of your body, waking up one morning to find that your hand isn’t there, or your leg has disappeared. It is a pain from which you never recover. Every morning there is a brief moment in which no one is gone, and then every morning you have to experience that loss as your mind wakes up and informs you of the truth.”

Luna’s eyes burned with tears that she refused to shed.

Evelyn took a calm sip of her drink. “I would not advise you to deliberately force a loss onto yourself. Stop being selfish,”

said Evelyn, gaze steady. “This isn’t just about what you want. Think about Mia. Has her life been better with you in it?”

Luna thought back to the time they’d spent together. To the way Mia had laughed. The way she’d been spontaneous, to how she’d jumped into the waterfall. It was like she had started living rather than just existing.

“Yes,”

she whispered.

“Then you already know your answer,”

said her grandmother gravely.

The heaviness of realization settled over Luna. This wasn’t about whether Mia had moved on or not. It wasn’t about fear or uncertainty. In the end, none of that mattered. What mattered was showing up. What mattered was making sure that Mia knew, without a doubt, that Luna loved her. Mia could make her own choices from there.

A slow grin spread across her face.

Evelyn arched an eyebrow. “What are you planning?”

Luna stood and stretched. “I don’t know yet. But it’s going to be something big,”

she said, grinning more widely.

Evelyn sighed. “I’ve created a monster,”

she said. “Just… don’t do anything reckless.”

Luna laughed, a spark of the old mischief in her eyes. “Oh, don’t worry, I will. Reckless, crazy, and ridiculous. You wouldn’t want me to change who I really am, would you?”

Evelyn shook her head in despair, and Luna skipped out of the room, still laughing.