Page 24 of The Accidental Nanny (All Of You #1)

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Alex

I t was the first day back at school after the Easter break. Returning to a routine was proving hard.

“Come on, we’ll be late,” I urge the children as I wait. I hold their school bags as they argue about who is sitting in the front.

“Eden, back. Ace, front. I’ll move the car seats later.” I do not have time for this.

I lock the door as we get into my Volvo.

The car I bought for Gemma is still sitting on the drive, untouched.

I can't bring myself to sell it. In a way, it's like holding onto a piece of her.

Eden started sleeping in my bed again as soon as Gemma vacated it.

Ace was faring better, but then, he had the rabbits to focus on.

We turn up at school and nobody is there.

“Daddy, why are we the only ones here?” Eden asks as we stand at the closed gate.

“Erm, hang on.” I open my phone and go to the school calendar. Teacher training day, of course .

“Change of plan. You’re coming to work with me,” I say, taking their hands and leading them back to the car.

Ace pulls back. “Not in my school uniform,” he argues.

I sigh. “Come on, Ace. I’ve got spare clothes in the car. You can get dressed in my office.”

“Workday with Daddy, yay,” Eden chants over and over again.

I get them back into the car and buckle them in. Fern is going to hate me, but she’ll have to watch them while I work.

“Fern.” The children are excited to see her.

“What are you monsters doing here?” She’s confused.

“Eggs for eyes or eyes for eggs?” Eden giggles.

“Neither,” Fern answers. “imagine eating your eyes.” They both laugh.

“Can you watch them? I’ll be two hours.” They follow me, getting dressed in my office.

“What’s these eggs for eyes thing?” I ask Eden.

“It’s a game Wesley played with us,” Ace replies for her.

Who the hell is Wesley?

“And he is?”

“Fern’s brother. He’s funny. He’s got big muscles,” he tells me.

“Big muscles?”

“Brody has cookies.” Eden adds.

I’m still confused to what this has to do with Wesley. She runs out to Fern before I can question her. I need another chat with her later.

“Behave,” I call out to them both.

Getting started on my meeting, we talk figures.

The newest data is showing that the app is performing well.

The design team has come up with an original program idea for secure banking.

They are running things by me, and my attention wanders when I notice the children are eating burgers whilst chatting to Fern .

“Let’s break for lunch,” I tell the team, who disburse. Once they have left the reception area, I hear Eden.

“She wants a baby, but he can’t have them.”

Fern locks eyes with me.

“My office.” I invite Fern in. She follows, shutting the door behind her. I stand by my desk. “What did you ask them?” I’m trying to stay calm, but my lips are closed and I’m breathing hard through my nose.

“Nothing,” she protests, her arms crossed.

“Then, what did they tell you?”

She’s embarrassed, her focus on the ground. It’s clear she doesn’t want to answer me.

“Fern!” I’m done with playing games. I want answers.

“That you can’t have children. She said you had an exstomy, which I presume means a vasectomy.”

I nod confirming what was said. “Are you going to tell Gemma?”

“How can I not?” She gulps.

“I’m asking you not to. She deserves to be happy.” I’m begging her.

“She was happy,” she exclaims, walking out on me.

Sitting back in my chair, I recline and think. I need to get to Gemma before Fern does. My only problem is, it’s Fern’s lunch time and I’m stuck here working with two children to look after.

GEMMA

There’s an odd call from Fern. It’s unlike her to want to meet during work. Putting on my cute pink dress, I apply some light makeup and get into my car.

“Hi.” I kiss Fern on the cheek as I sit down with an orange juice. She’s looking stressed.

“You might want something stronger," she says. She isn’t one to encourage me to drink .

“I’m driving. What’s wrong?”

She takes a moment to formulate what she needs to say.

“Alex had a meeting, so he left me to watch the kids. Eden… She told me something. She said you wanted a baby,” Fern says, treading carefully as though admitting it might break me.

“Gem, he broke up with you because he can’t have a baby with you.

He had a vasectomy. He let you go because he wanted to give you the world, and he couldn’t.

He wanted you to not have to choose.” She stares at me as she drops this bombshell.

“You’re trusting a six-year-old?” I question her.

“Alex confirmed it. He can’t have a baby.”

The waitress arrives, but I can't do this. “I’ve got to go.” I stand up, leaving her.

“He loves you,” Fern shouts after me as I run out the door.

I can't handle this. I'm not equipped to handle this. I need to speak to someone. I need to talk to an adult. I may be an adult, but I need more of an adult.

“Mum,” I shout as I run into the house. “Mum?” I find her in the garden, pruning the roses.

“Yes, why are you shouting?” she asks, standing up and looking at me.

“He couldn’t have a baby, that’s why he broke up with me.” I look at her, tears filling my eyes.

“What?” she gasps. Mum rubs the back of her gloved hand over her brow, leaving a slight, brown smudge behind.

Wiping at my eyes furiously, I say, “Fern found out today and told me.”

“Fern found out?” my mother says. "How did Fern find out any of this?"

“Fern works for Alex.”

“Fern works for Alex? ”

Jesus, what did my mother not understand? I came here for advice, not an echo.

“Yes, she’s been working for him. Alex took the children in today and Eden told her why he broke up with me. It’s because I said in the future, I wanted a baby with him, and he had a vasectomy. He didn’t want me to choose. He didn’t ask me.” My chin is dripping with tears.

“I see. Let’s make a pot of tea.” My mother’s eyes grow steady, and I feel her take charge.

I sit outside, looking around the garden, my fingernails tapping away on my legs. I would chew at them if I hadn’t just had them done.

“How do you feel?” Mum asks, returning with a tray and placing it down.

“Angry, very angry,” I say. "I can't believe he did this." I want to hurl the cup across the garden, but this is Mum’s most expensive tea set.

“Okay. Why?”

“I love him, and he didn’t tell me the truth.” I watch as she pours the tea into the cup, followed by a sugar cube, but I don’t take sugar.

“For the shock,” she says, like she can read my mind. She hands it over, then pours her own drink and takes a sip. I wait for her to tell me what to do. “And if he did? Could you give up the chance to have your own baby, Gemma? Carrying a child, giving birth. Could you give all that up?”

I frown. “Yes, of course I could.” What kind of question was that?

“Are you sure? You say that now, but what about the future? What about in five years’ time? This is a big decision.”

I grimace at the taste of the sugary tea. “We could adopt, try reversing it. Sperm donor?”

“Does Alex even want any more children? He thought he was doing right by you. How much does having a baby mean to you? Does Alex mean more to you than a baby does?” She looks at me, waiting.

I've always known the answer to that question. It is simple. “I was a mum to two beautiful children. They are mine and I love them.”

My mother smiles. "You were a wonderful mum to those two children, but we have to consider the facts now, Gemma. It's over, and you're not their mum. Alex wants to give you a chance at being a mum yourself."

"I want to be their mum," I say. "He's such an arsehole."

"Most men are, dear," she says as a matter of fact.