Page 11

The train rocked gently as it glided over the tracks, the rhythmic clatter a dull background to Tessa’s whirlwind thoughts. She sat near the window, several rows away from Tommy but within direct sight. Keeping her eyes on the passing scenery, she kept her demeanor neutral, almost bored. She was only a businesswoman on a commute, nothing more.

In this train section, seats faced each other, with tables in between. The two passengers across from her were busy on laptops and phones and paid little attention to her or anyone else. But she would feel Tommy’s insistent stare.

Keeping her head turned toward the windows, she avoided his stare because he was going to blow their cover.

At least, that’s what she told herself.

In reality, she kept her face averted from him and the others because of the doubts gnawing at her.

Tommy claimed he’d seen Jessie—not once but three times. Grief made people see ghosts where none existed. As she’d told him, she knew that firsthand.

But after what had happened, her brain kept insisting it wasn’t a ghost.

It had been a woman who’d shot at them. She was sure of it. And the shooter had missed on purpose.

Was someone imitating Jessie to draw Tommy into some maddening game? Why? What purpose could there be in that? What tie could it have to the Russians and the EMPs, if anything?

She replayed the memory of Jessie’s gruesome execution in her mind. It had most certainly been a living human being who’d had their head removed by Hagar’s machete. Meg had confirmed that the remains had been verified as Jessica Mendoza by the CIA.

Meg, who’d been a complete and utter mess. Who’d been beaten and tortured for days before the rescue. Who’d been so traumatized over witnessing the brutal killing up close and personal that she’d been unable to speak for days. She’d been in a stupor for months. She’d quit the Agency over it.

Tessa needed to see the footage again. To zoom in on the woman’s face. At first glance—on the hundredth—it had looked like Jessie, and yet, her face had been mangled, swollen, and bruised.

No. Tessa mentally shook her head. There was no way anyone could survive that. No way the CIA could be fooled into believing the dead woman was Jessica Mendoza.

And there was nothing she could do about it at the moment. She didn’t have access to the video, which was on her laptop at her apartment. She couldn’t reach out to anyone at Langley without raising questions. She couldn’t ask Meg without revealing her suspicions, which could send Meg spiraling again.

Unless Meg was behind the cover-up.

Cover up? Tessa purposely pulled herself back from that ledge. She might not be the Agency’s biggest fan, but not everything was a conspiracy. Tommy’s spottings could simply be the result of an overwrought mind. Just like hers had been over her stepfather all these years.

Her brain circled back to Meg and the revelation about the virus.

If Meg had lied about it, she could be behind some bigger conspiracy that Flynn and the higher-ups had contrived—or quite possibly had no idea about. It might have nothing to do with Jessie’s death, but it certainly had some connection.

Which would make Tessa’s analysis of Meg all wrong.

When was the last time I was wrong about anyone?

Meg was an expert at a lot of things, and she knew how to contrive deep cover stories, but the shock, guilt, and grief she’d displayed after Jessie’s death had been real. Tessa was sure of that.

Had someone tricked them all?

The window had fogged with her accelerated breathing. She swallowed and forced her pulse to slow. To steady her breath. Stay in character. She was nothing but a nondescript traveler on her way to the next stop.

Meanwhile, her brain continued to churn. If Tommy was correct, and Meg had lied about Del not triggering the virus on the USB… Then what?

Then Meg didn’t trust Tessa.

Fair enough. Tessa had thrown everything back at her, refusing to officially join the team and making her stance on the Agency clear. Meg wasn’t about to share classified information under the circumstances, and Tessa would have done the same in her shoes.

But suspecting there was something else going on behind the scenes made the whole thing not sit right with her.

Trust was a weapon. You could never have true friends when you were a spy. Conrad Flynn had taught them all that.

The train brakes hissed as it slowed to navigate a bend. Tessa briefly glanced toward Tommy, who was in an aisle seat facing her direction and drumming his fingers on the table between him and his fellow passengers. At least, he’d given up staring a hole in her. Only his profile was visible now, and although he appeared calm and detached as he read something on his burner phone, she detected the strain around his eyes and mouth.

A mouth she’d kissed and wanted to again.

Like her, his neutral expression was a shield.

A calculated fa?ade.

She wanted to talk to him about Jessie, the virus, and everything—but maintaining their cover was critical.

They had to appear as strangers.

They’d fumbled at the station with their banter and his impulsive dash into the crowd, but no one had seemed to notice.

Still, Tessa’s training and instinct told her not to take chances.

The shooter from the previous day materialized in her mind, and she gave the compartment a casual scan of those she could see.

No one stood out to her, and none of the faces resembled Jessie at all.

Her mind replayed the chase—the shot that shattered the glass but would have missed entirely if she hadn’t pivoted.

The way the shooter had caught up to them in the alley but missed again when she’d fired and then abandoned the pursuit.

Amateur or professional? Could be either, depending on the outcome they’d been after.

Could it be the Jessie imposter?

Could it be Jessie?

Tessa shut down the impossible thought, even as those pesky doubts lingered and continued to gnaw at her. If Jessie was alive, what did that mean? Why would she keep it a secret? Why would she shoot at Tessa and Tommy?

Was she tied to the pending EMP attacks?

Tessa’s pulse spiked again, her breath catching at the idea of such a betrayal. It was too much, even for her jaded heart and cynical mind. Until she could get some solid answers to her questions, all she was doing was creating more dragons to slay.

Her phone vibrated, the sound muffled in her pocket but still jarring. She had two now, and this wasn’t the burner that only Tommy had the number to. She frowned, angling the screen so her neighbor couldn’t read it.

Spence.

In all the time she’d known him, he’d only ever contacted her directly a few times. They’d always been friends but not teammates. Why was he calling now? To join Meg’s recruitment campaign?

“Hey,”

she answered stiffly. “What’s going on?”

“Oh, you know: Meg and Dec fighting. Flynn yelling. End of the world shit.”

He gave a half-hearted chuckle. “I should ask you the same thing. What’s going on?”

She glanced at the passengers in her booth. “I’m heading to London for a few days. I’m on the train now. I’ll call you back once I’ve landed, okay?”

“Don’t lie to me.”

She should hang up. Pretend she’d settled things with her caller, and all was fine. “I know why you’re calling, and I’m sorry, but the answer is no. I can’t. Talk soon!”

“Tess, wait, luv.”

His voice softened, catching her before she could disconnect. “I know I don’t say this often, but I care about you. We all do.”

His admission took her by surprise. Something inside her that was hard and cold melted a little. Out of all of them, he could do that to her—make her feel more human.

“Look, luv,”

she warned, using his term because she didn’t want to say his name. It was an old habit, born of her training, but using real names, even over a secure line, was dangerous.

He bulldozed over her. “I cared about Jessie, too.”

His voice cracked, and its roughness surprised her as much as his previous admission. “More than just a teammate. I never told her. Never told anyone. I don’t wanna make that mistake again. I want you to know that, regardless of whether you join the team or not, I have the utmost admiration and respect for you. You’ve been a true friend, and I appreciate that. They’re hard to come by in our line of work.”

Tessa’s pulse skipped and then hammered hard. It was as if he had read her thoughts. She pressed her back into the seat, wishing she could disappear into it. “She knew.”

The return shocked silence told her she’d surprised him this time. “She did?”

His voice hitched. “You’re saying Jessie knew I…”

“That you were in love with her, yes.”

In some way, they all had been. Jessie had been a free spirit while being so good at her job. She’d made everyone believe they were special. Made them all think that she would do anything for them, no matter the consequences. No matter what the mission took out of her or what line she might have to cross to protect them.

She had given each of them the rarest gift of friendship—total and unconditional loyalty.

She was one of the few I trusted.

The realization caught her in the chest, and she hiccupped. One of the men across from her glanced up at the sound, and she quickly focused on the landscape flying by the window again.

“Did she feel the same about me?”

Spence’s vulnerability was evident in his words.

This was the last place she wanted to have this conversation, but she felt she owed him that much. “I don’t know. I wish I could say yes, but I think she was afraid to let herself form a relationship with someone like you.”

“Someone like me?”

His tone was offended. “What’s that supposed to mean? “

The man across from her returned to his laptop. “Not what you think. You were a teammate. She had deep feelings for you, that I do know, but romantic ones? I’m sorry. I can’t verify that.”

“Ever the analyst,”

he chuckled. “At least she didn’t die not knowing how I felt. I guess that’s something, eh?”

“It is.”

She could give him that much. “Say, I have a question for you.”

He gave a resigned sigh at the change of subject. “Shoot.”

Although the others seemed busy, she feared she’d garnered their interest. “Hold on, will you?”

She rose and made for the aisle.

Tommy looked up, his Tessa radar instantly on alert and burning a hole into her back as she headed for the restroom. She didn’t speak again until she was locked inside. “You’re my favorite tech guy, and I have a question. If Tommy planted a virus on the USB Meg and Dec recovered from the embassy, would Del miss it?”

He hesitated. “What are you asking?”

“If you think it’s possible he missed such a glaring thing.”

“Of course, it’s possible. Del’s good—the best we’ve got—but even the best make mistakes. You know that.”

It wasn’t meant to pierce her heart, but it did. She’d been the best at what she did once. And yes, she’d made mistakes.

She wondered now if one of them had been recommending Jessie for the Black Swan Division. Meg, Dec, and Spence had no idea that Flynn had put Tessa on the spot about it when he’d come to her, telling her about Meg’s brilliant idea. One he wished he had come up with himself.

“There’s something else,”

Spence said. “Before the drive was wiped, Del found something that changes the game.”

The train swayed, and she gripped the sink card to keep her balance. Spence had to know that Meg hadn’t told her, and if he was volunteering it, he was going against the unspoken rule of the team—only Meg got to share classified information. That fact had to be bugging Spence enough to break protocol and share it with her. She didn’t question why. “You’re treading on dangerous ground if you tell me.”

“I’ve never backed away from dangerous plays before. And just like confessing about my love for Jessie and how important you are to me, I need to do this.”

This could be treason. Treason against the swans, against the CIA itself. If they found out, he’d need a good lawyer. “You better be sure. I’m not officially one of your team.”

“I don’t know what game you’re running, Tessa, but you are one of us. You can deny it all day long, but I don’t buy it. I’m telling you because you need to know in order to watch your back. If I didn’t say something and you were hurt or killed…”

He cleared his throat. “If you tell anyone I am your source, I’ll deny it.”

It wasn’t a threat—he was simply letting her know she didn’t need to worry about him. “You better. I’m listening.”

“There is evidence suggesting that someone quite familiar with how the Agency works is framing us for the coming EMP attacks.”

The train jolted as it hit a rough patch of track, pitching her sideways. Her knees buckled, and only her grip on the sink kept her upright. “What?”

“They’re manipulating global events to destabilize power structures and pin the blame on us.”

Her blood ran cold. “Someone inside the CIA?”

“Either that or a former operative. It has to be someone with a lot of connections and resources. They’ve got access to intel that only certain people should. Could be someone high up in the ranks or someone who was at one time.”

“Or someone very familiar with the swans.”

He caught her gist. “Tommy?”

She shook her head, catching sight of her pale face in the mirror over the sink. The announcement for their next stop crackled over the speakers. “I have to go,”

she said. “Thanks for the heads up. If this is true, you need to watch your back. Don’t worry about mine.”

She cut off the call before Spencer could reply and shoved the phone into her pocket. As she left the restroom and returned to her seat, she avoided Tommy’s inquisitive gaze.

A former CIA employee framing the swans for the attacks? Tommy had only been an analyst. Or had he? She’d already found herself questioning that. Her skin crawled as she sank into her seat.

Had he been lying all this time?

Feeling his gaze still on her, she raised her own to meet his down the aisle. If he’d lied to her, if he was using her…

She gripped the armrest, realizing the predicament she was now in. Helping a traitor. Hell, he might be pinning the whole thing on her.

As the train began to slow, carrying them to their next destination, her gut cramped. Stupid. She’d been so damn stupid.

And now, she would have to become the ultimate spy so she could turn the tables on him.