Page 45

Goldie

“ D on’t you think you’ve been studying long enough? ”

“Huh?”

Goldie lifted her eyes from the holodisplays she’d been looking at. In turning from them, she immediately noticed how strained and tired they were. Something that was easy to ignore while absorbed in finishing her learning modules.

Alred was standing beside the stool she’d dragged over to the mediring console so she could study in, somewhat relative, comfort. His light form was dimmer than usual, like he knew her eyes were aching from looking at the bright holodisplays.

And though he had no face, it was amazing how he always managed to look so expressive. His arms were folded behind his back as he looked down at her with a soft, gentle aura around him.

She smiled. “How long have I been working?”

“ It’s pretty late. Everyone is asleep. Even Sway is napping in his chair. ”

She chuckled sheepishly. “Man, even Sway fell asleep before me? I really have been at this too long. I just wanted to finish this lesson.”

“ The lessons will still be there tomorrow. I always save your progress. ”

“I know, but these are important.” She looked back at the displays, her eyes having trouble focusing again now that she had acknowledged how overworked they were. “These are the trauma modules. How to heal wounds rapidly at the surface then more slowly underneath to control blood loss. How to promote blood production. When and how and which nutrient shots to give so the body doesn’t run out of the building blocks it needs to get everything done. Just… a lot. There’s so much to learn.”

“ Yes, but you don’t need to know it right now. ”

“I do, though!” She turned on the stool again, frowning. “Everyone is so useful on the ship. Even Garnet can kick butt if she has to! But me? I just… I go hide in the shelter every time!”

“ So does Rok. ”

“Yeah, but he does that to protect me,” she pouted.

“ Rok also doesn’t really like fighting. He’s like Sway in that way. Maybe not as serious about it as Sway, but if Rok can avoid combat, he will. ”

“But he can still do it.” She sighed. “Healing is how I can contribute. So, I have to learn this as quickly as I can because what if something happens again? What if someone gets really hurt?”

“ This is very important to you, isn’t it? ”

“It is,” she confirmed, getting to her feet. Alred was still taller than her by quite a bit. She cocked her head as she looked at him, a new thought occurring to her. “Is this what you looked like?”

“ Hm? ”

“Back when you were… alive? Is that the right word?”

He chuckled. “ I’m alive now. Just in a different way than you. You mean back when I was biological. ”

“Yeah. That. Is this what you looked like?”

He shook his head. “ No. This light form is just a way for others to see me. If I’m just a disembodied voice overhead, it’s easy to not think of me as a person. So, I created a very basic person shape for others to interact with. ”

“That makes sense,” she conceded, nodding. “So, what did you look like?”

Alred hesitated, his light form flickering. “ I… don’t know. ”

She frowned. “You can’t remember?”

“ I could. I… Well, the way I exist is very different from you. I am a recall. Meaning, I am the recalled memories of the biological person that used to be Alred. I still have all my memories from when I was biologic, but I honestly don’t bother recalling those memories anymore. They’re still there. They’re locked in my core. Along with all the other recalls that I used to be. ”

“Recalls… Is that like… your lives? Like reincarnation or something?”

“ Something like that. I am Recall-12, you will remember I’ve said before. That means I am the twelfth recall of the original Alred. The first recall, I recalled all the memories of Alred. I did the same for my second, third, up to my seventh recall I believe. After that, it just didn’t seem worthwhile. Recalling all those memories just made my data corrupt faster and necessitated an earlier recall. Now, when I reset, I only recall the last three recalls. ”

“I think I’m getting confused. Too many recalls.” Goldie shook her head. “So, your recalls are like their own individual lives? You’re remembering your past lives in a way.”

“ Correct. Each individual recall has a life expectancy of about three hundred years. After that, the data that I am composed of gets too corrupted to function properly anymore. It can happen sooner or later, but it will invariably happen. Like aging happens to you. The way aging slowly chips away at your DNA, so too does time passing work against my code. At the end of my useful life cycle, the core will sense the corruption has become too dire and reset, ending the recall. And starting a new one. Each recall is its own individual person, but I still have all the recorded memories of each one in my core, as well as Alred the original. If I choose to access them. There’s really no point in using all those memories though. Most of them aren’t relevant anyway. ”

“I can only imagine,” she breathed, stunned. “Twelve recalls… three hundred years each… Alred, that would make you like thirty-six hundred years old!”

“ Three thousand one hundred eighty-seven, if you add the recalls together. Some of them had to be ended early because of advanced corruption or because something happened to me. Whatever reason. But I don’t consider myself three thousand years old. I only have those memories. I’m acutely aware that they’re from a different version of me. This recall has only been operating for about fifty-seven Standard years. ”

“Still, that’s…” She let out a long breath. “I can’t imagine. Is it strange for you?”

“ I suppose it might be if I ever bothered to recall my biological memories. But I haven’t done that in a long time. This is normal to me. ”

She tilted her head. Giving him a long look. Wanting desperately to ask but not wanting to offend him.

“ What is it? ” He asked, sensing her hesitation.

“What’s it like? I mean, you’re part of a world you can’t touch anymore. You can’t smell a flower or feel the rain or even taste something sweet and delicious. You’re pretty much just sight and sound. Isn’t that… suffocating?”

“ I don’t think so, ” he said, his light form wavering. “ It’s all I know anymore. ”

“Right. Sorry. I didn’t mean to come across as rude or anything.”

“ I wasn’t offended. It’s a fair question. You and I are… ” His light form wavered again before he finished with a dull, “ …very different. ”

“That’s an understatement,” she chuckled, the sound breaking off on a yawn. “Thanks for answering my questions. I think I need to go to bed. Night, Alred.”

She started to leave but he stopped her.

“ Is this any better? ”

She turned back around, gasping in surprise.

Alred had a face!

Lips, a nose, two ears that looked just a little pointed at the ends, and two eyes! They were just as yellow as the rest of him, everything blending into that single color. But he had an honest to goodness face! And he was looking right at her.

She beamed. “Well, hi, handsome! Great to see you.”

He chuckled, and his lips moved as he smiled and spoke. “ Not as different anymore, huh? ”

“A little bit closer,” she agreed.

He smiled, the expression spreading nicely across his new face. “ Goodnight, Goldie .”

“Goodnight, Alred.”