Page 27 of Take You Home (Redwater Demons #3)

R ealizing that an ancient and powerful demon god is also just, like, a dude who pays taxes is probably the most surreal experience of Chester’s life. “You have to document it?”

Obie throws Chester a disgruntled look from his current vantage point underneath a tenant’s kitchen sink. “I’m a landlord, puppy. Of course I have to document repair work. I have to document pretty much everything.”

Chester rolls his eyes, not that Obie is paying attention.

Apparently, after over three weeks of stalwartly keeping Chester away from most aspects of his personal life, Obie finally had to admit defeat and bring Chester along to run some errands around Redwater.

Talking with realtors, depositing checks, doing maintenance and repair work??—

Chester knew that Obie owns a lot of land in Redwater, most of which he’s converted into rental properties.

He just wasn’t aware that Obie is so hands-on with his tenants.

Not only did Obie come here personally to fix this apartment’s leaking pipe, but he also timed his visit so he could babysit for the occupant while she shops for groceries.

The baby in question is sound asleep in her crib, which Obie dragged over to better keep an eye on her. He even cast a soundproofing spell to make sure their conversation doesn’t wake her up.

It’s actually really sweet. Chester is trying not to think about it too hard. “Why don’t you have a property manager to do all this? You have more than enough money to hire one.”

“Because I’m trying to keep these apartments as affordable as possible, Locke.

Have you seen the housing market lately?

Spoiler alert: it’s disgusting. I don’t want people to spend half their income on a basic human necessity.

” He unceremoniously thrusts a flashlight in Chester’s direction. “Aim this at the pipe for me.”

Heaving a sigh, Chester complies. Obie carefully reaches up with his wrench to tighten the slip nuts at the pipe’s joints. “And you’d have to increase rent if you hired someone?”

Obie grimaces. “Technically speaking, I don’t need to charge rent at all.

It’s not like I need the money. But I like my businesses to be self-sustaining in the unlikely event that I get killed or lose every penny I own.

Right now, everybody’s rent covers maintenance, utilities, and taxes, and I have a slim profit margin that I use for emergency repairs and, like, planting nice flowers around the buildings. ”

Briefly, Chester thinks about the neat, colorful bushes they passed on the way into this apartment. “Let me guess. You plant them yourself?”

“Why do you have such an issue with me doing work?”

“I don’t have an issue with it,” Chester argues, adjusting the angle of his flashlight when Obie shifts his position. “But if I was a billionaire like you, I wouldn’t work another day in my life.”

“First of all,” Obie says, “I’m not a billionaire. ”

Chester rolls his eyes. “I’ve looked up your net worth. You’re a billionaire.”

“At any given point in time? Yes,” Obie says. “That’s what happens when you’ve been alive since long before the stock market even existed. But I donate enough every year to keep me out of the billionaire category, because no one actually needs that much money.”

Chester blinks twice, surprised. That wasn’t in the Sanctum’s file on Obie. Maybe they didn’t think it was important enough to include? “Really?”

“Yep,” Obie confirms, tightening the final slip nut and clambering to his feet with a satisfied expression.

“Also, you only have about a hundred years to enjoy life. I’ve been on this planet for fifteen thousand years.

Even with streaming services, life can get pretty boring when you don’t need to sleep. Plus, it’s fulfilling.”

Chester squints back at him, passing him the flashlight.

Obie puts it neatly back in his toolbelt, which is another thing Chester can’t get over.

The demon god owns a toolbelt. He puts tools in it.

It’s kind of adorable. “How is being a landlord fulfilling? Frankly, I thought it would top the list of least fulfilling jobs.”

Suddenly, there’s the quiet click of a key in the door’s lock.

Obie snaps his fingers; immediately, Chester feels the familiar sheen of invisibility and soundproofing spells drape over him.

“Keira, is that you?” Obie calls. “Because if you’re a robber, I’m obligated by law to tell you that I invented several martial arts systems.”

Chester snorts. The woman at the door laughs as she strolls into the apartment, two grocery bags slung over her arm. “It’s just me, Mr. Smith. How’s the leak? Do we need to call a plumber?”

“You doubt me?” Obie asks, gesturing towards the sink with a flourish. “All fixed. Just let me know if you have any other problems, and I’ll come back to sort them out.”

Keira beams at him. Chester blinks, taken aback. “Thanks so much, Mr. Smith! I really appreciate it! And I appreciate you keeping an eye on the little one,” she adds, tiptoeing over to peek into the crib. “She didn’t get fussy, did she?”

“Not at all,” Obie assures her. “I put a temporary soundproofing spell in place so she wouldn’t hear me cursing at the pipes, and she didn’t wake up once.”

“Thank goodness. Chores take twice as long with her, but I usually don’t have any other options while Sam is at work. And then Sam usually can’t run chores while I’m at work, since I’m on the night shift, and…” She sighs. “It’s a lot.”

Obie frowns. “Well, I’ve looked after my fair share of human children over the millennia.

My schedule is a bit…” He hesitates, his eyes flickering in Chester’s direction.

“A bit unpredictable at the moment, but if you ever need someone to babysit for a few hours, just text me. I’d be happy to keep an eye on her if I’m available. ”

Keira’s eyes widen. “Really?”

“Of course. It takes a village, after all.”

Keira’s smile looks watery. Unexpectedly, she steps forward and wraps Obie in an enormous hug, and Chester hastily steps out of the way, startled. “Thank you so much, Mr. Smith! You’re a lifesaver!”

Obie pats her shoulder, smiling. Chester’s heart twinges. Apparently, Obie isn’t just an involved landlord who’ll fix leaky pipes and busted light fixtures himself?—he’s very nearly a friend to his tenants. He looks after them.

Just like he looks after Redwater Bowl. Chester remembers thinking that the bowling alley collectively adopted Obie as their resident demon god and realizes with a start that he might’ve had it backwards all along.

Maybe Obie found a group of people that he cared about and decided to make it his mission in life to look after them, instead.

“It would be my pleasure, Keira,” Obie says, disentangling himself from her bear hug. “And how many times do I have to tell you that you can call me Obie, not ‘Mr. Smith’?”

She grins back at him. “Sure thing, Mr. Smith.”

Obie snorts out a laugh, shaking his head.

“All right, all right. I know when I’m beaten.

” He gestures towards the crib, and a shiver vibrates through the air as the soundproofing spell evaporates.

Much more quietly, he adds, “Tell Sam I say hello, yeah? And give Baby Addison a little nose kiss for me.”

“I will!” Keira says, waving as he strides towards the door. “Talk to you soon!”

Obie waves back before closing the door gently behind them and strolling towards the elevator. Chester waits until they’re safely inside before speaking. “Do you know all of your tenants personally?”

“I know all of their names,” Obie says, taking off his toolbelt and depositing it back into its pocket dimension, “but some of them prefer to keep to themselves. Even if I don’t go around banging on doors for rent, a lot of people are uncomfortable with the guy who controls their housing. I get that.”

A trickle of curiosity twines through Chester’s mind. “How much do you charge for rent, anyway? Two thousand a month?”

Obie looks scandalized. “What? Of course not. I don’t even charge that much for the two-bedroom apartments near Lakeside, and those are waterfront real estate. In this particular building, all of the apartments are studios, so I try to keep rent around four hundred.”

Chester’s jaw drops. “Four hundred a month? That’s it?”

“I’m doing my part to end the housing crisis,” Obie argues, leading the way out of the elevator and through the empty lobby.

“And you saw Keira. She and Sam both work full-time, they both have student loan debt, and they have a new baby. They couldn’t afford two thousand a month?—or, if they could, they’d be living paycheck to paycheck. ”

There’s a strange feeling in Chester’s chest. He valiantly attempts to ignore it. “I’m pretty sure most landlords don’t really care if their tenants are living paycheck to paycheck.”

“Well, I’m not most landlords,” Obie fires back, shouldering his way into the sunlight outside the building. “You up for another job? I can show you some of those apartments over at Lakeside?—the hot water isn’t working in one of them.”

There’s a tinge of excitement in Obie’s voice. Almost like he’s having a good time visiting his tenants and working through their myriad problems.

Maybe he’s having a good time showing everything to Chester, too. The warmth in Chester’s chest glows brighter. “Sure. I don’t have anywhere else to be.”

“Excellent,” Obie says, and as they set off towards Lakeside, Chester takes a deep breath and tries not to think about how comfortingly domestic this all feels.

“Oh, my God,” Trevor says, grabbing Chester’s shoulders and shaking him lightly. “Oh, my God!”

“Um.” Chester throws Obie a look of pure terror. “Hi?”

“Oh, my God!” Trevor repeats, and he rounds on Obie, his eyes wide. “Obadiah! Why would you not tell us that you have a boyfriend?”

“A demon is allowed to have his secrets,” Obie says defensively. “And it’s only been a few weeks, okay? I didn’t want to subject Kyle to all of you on the first date.”