Page 25 of Take You Home (Redwater Demons #3)

O bie gapes at Ez, appalled. “What do you mean, you and Roma haven’t said ‘I love you’ to each other yet?”

Ez wrinkles her nose back at him, unrepentant. “Exactly what I said, Obie. It just hasn’t seemed necessary.”

Obie buries his face in his hands, groaning. Right now, he’s sitting across from Ez at a picnic table at Lakeside, enjoying the early-August warmth and waiting for a human-magic glamoured Roma?—and a Kyle-glamoured Chester?—to bring back their churros con chocolate from Churrería.

Obie wrestled hard with whether to make Chester invisible for today’s meetup before reluctantly deciding on the glamour, instead.

Honestly, he doesn’t want to bring out the Boyfriend Kyle cameos too often.

Knowing the food truck operators, they’ve probably already voted him in as Redwater’s hottest new cryptid.

But Obie can’t risk Ez or Roma blabbing about any sensitive conspiracy secrets with an invisible Chester nearby, not like Sawyer inadvertently did three days ago.

While Chester hasn’t mentioned the human-magic glamours or the power signatures since then, Obie can’t guarantee that he won’t tell the Sanctum’s Council in the future.

And, more importantly, Obie saw how badly Sawyer’s words about Chester not being suited for his job hurt him.

Obie fights back a pang at the thought. Over the past few days, Chester has thrown himself into his auxiliary duties in the prison with renewed vigor, going above and beyond to be even more precise and efficient than before?—like he’s actively trying to prove Sawyer wrong.

Obie hasn’t had the heart to point out that Sawyer was specifically talking about interrogation duty, not auxiliary duty.

And, frankly, he doesn’t have the heart to let Ez and Roma potentially get into Chester’s head again now. So Obie supposes he’ll just have to deal with Ez’s leers and the knowing looks from every food truck operator?—despite the fact that he is, once again, glamoured beyond recognition.

But he has more pressing matters to attend to right now. “It just hasn’t seemed necessary,” Obie repeats miserably. “How has she not broken up with you yet?”

Ez sputters indignantly. “It’s not like it’s been years and years! It hasn’t even been two months!”

“That woman defected from the Sanctum for you, Esmeralda! You damn well better love her!”

“I do,” Ez stresses. “I do, okay? I just haven’t, you know, said it in so many words at this juncture. Do I really have to? I show that I love her in plenty of ways. I cook for her and research spells with her and do lots of very spicy things in the bedroom and??—?”

“I don’t need examples, thanks.” Obie squints at her. “Wait. Roma hasn’t said it yet, either?”

Ez shakes her head. “So it’s probably fine, right?”

“I…” Obie rakes his teeth over his bottom lip. Romantic relationships in general have never been his strong suit, especially not romantic relationships between his belligerent best friend and an equally belligerent ex-hunter. “I guess? But you might want to ask a human about that. Like JJ.”

“JJ argued quite passionately that I should say it first,” Ez says. “It was a moving speech. I almost cried.”

“Huh.” Obie shrugs. “Well, he is the only other human among us. He probably knows best.”

“Probably,” Ez concedes, redirecting her attention towards Chester and Roma as they stroll up to the table with a tray of churros con chocolate in tow. “Finally, our sustenance has arrived. What took you so long?”

“Not my fault,” Roma says, shooting a pointed look at Obie as she sits down next to Ez. “Ana and Julio had several detailed questions for Kyle about his intentions towards Obie.”

“I felt like I was being interrogated by my prom date’s parents,” Chester agrees, setting the tray in the center of the table before cautiously taking the seat next to Obie. “Does everyone you meet just decide to adopt you? The bowling alley, the food truck crowd…”

“What can I say?” Obie says, grabbing his churros and a cup of chocolate. “I’m charming.”

“Sure you are.” Chester waits for everyone else to claim their orders before taking his own, eyebrows furrowed. Obie can tell that Chester doesn’t quite know what to expect, but he gamely follows Roma’s lead, putting one of the churros in his cup to soak up the chocolatey goodness.

Ez idly dunks her own churro a few times, scrutinizing Roma critically.

Then, all at once, she straightens in her seat like she’s made an important decision. “Hey,” she says to Roma.

Roma frowns back at her. “Yes? ”

“I love you,” Ez says. “You know that, right?”

Roma stops dead. “What?”

“Aw,” Chester says, sounding almost touched. “That’s really sweet. That’s??—?”

“God damn it!” Roma snaps, slamming her hand on the table. “What the hell, Laguerre? You just lost me a bet!”

Ez gapes at her. “I’m sorry?”

“A bet?” Obie repeats, incredulous. “What do you mean, you lost a bet?”

“Exactly what I said,” Roma complains. Obie is amused to note that Ez and Roma are using the same speech patterns now. “JJ and I had a bet about who would say ‘I love you’ first, Ez to me or Obie to Kyle. And I bet on Obie and Kyle.”

“Yikes,” Obie says. “Well, at least that explains why JJ wanted you to say it so badly, Ez.”

Ez looks thunderstruck. “You bet on Obie? He and Kyle have only been dating for two and a half weeks, Gutierrez! We’ve been dating for over a month!”

“Well, you’re kind of notoriously allergic to feelings, babe,” Roma counters. “I figured it was easy money!”

“How much was it?” Chester asks, twirling his churro in the chocolate before taking a tentative bite.

Roma sighs, defeated. “Fifty dollars.”

Ez squints at her. “Do you even have fifty dollars?”

“No,” Roma says. “On an unrelated note, can I borrow fifty dollars?”

“Absolutely not. You bet against me.”

Roma turns hopeful eyes on Obie. “Obie?”

“I don’t know,” Obie drawls, fighting back a smile. “Kyle, what do you think? Since Roma bet on us, should we loan her the money? ”

Chester doesn’t answer, staring down into the depths of his cup of chocolate.

Obie frowns, poking his shoulder. “Hello? Earth to Kyle? Did you hear me?”

“I… think I’m having a religious experience,” Chester says faintly, shoving another huge bite of churro into his mouth. “These are fantastic.”

Ez’s eyebrows shoot up. “You’ve never tried Churrería before? Obie, have you even been feeding him?”

“I’ve been trying to feed him,” Obie says defensively. “Not my fault he’s a homebody who hasn’t tried every food truck in Redwater yet.”

“I’m not even gonna argue with you there,” Chester says, practically inhaling his churros.

Roma’s lips twitch. “Glad we can convert someone else to the religion of Churrería,” she says, leaning forward. “So Ez said you have a spellcasting challenge for us? I could use the distraction from these stupid human-magic rifts.”

Chester almost drops his churro. “Human-magic rifts?”

Damn it, Gutierrez. Hastily, Obie jumps in. “Still nothing on that front, huh?”

Roma scowls. “Not even a little bit. Translating interdimensionality from demon magic to human magic is nearly impossible.”

“We’ll figure it out eventually,” Ez says firmly. “I mean, we thought human-magic glamours were impossible until recently, right?”

“Well, yeah, they’re possible,” Roma says. “But they’re still not that good.”

“Only you could be dissatisfied that your entirely new subset of magic isn’t perfect within literal weeks of creating it,” Obie says .

“In any case,” Chester says, taking a long gulp of his chocolate, “Obie has a spellcasting challenge for you, yes. I’m just along for the ride.”

“He’s lying,” Obie informs Ez and Roma. “He was very excited when I mentioned hanging out with you and specifically asked if he could come with me. Said he couldn’t wait to see you again.”

“I did not!” Chester says defensively. “Not that you aren’t, you know, great and everything, but??—?”

Roma rolls her eyes. “Don’t worry, Kyle. Messing with people is how Obie shows affection.”

Chester blinks twice, startled, and vividly, Obie remembers what he told Chester when Chester complained about the fake-dating scheme.

I was just messing with you, Locke.

Obie cuts in before either of them can think too hard about that memory. “In any case,” he says, “Kyle is… somewhat involved in this story.”

Chester looks taken aback. “Obie??—?”

“A dumbass friend of his tried to pre-cast a complex spell,” Obie interrupts, “and, as you can probably guess, it went horribly wrong.”

Ez and Roma both groan in unison. “Seriously?” Roma asks, burying her face in her hands. “Seriously? I swear, pre-casting is the absolute worst thing spellcasters have ever invented.”

“I mean, it has its uses sometimes,” Ez says diplomatically, “but not often. What kind of spell was it?”

“Um…” Chester fidgets. “It was, uh, a binding spell.”

Ez stiffens. “A binding spell? Like the ones summoners use on neophyte demons?”

Roma’s eyes narrow. “Who’s this friend of yours, Kyle?”

Chester looks like a deer caught in headlights. Once again, Obie jumps in to defuse the tension. “No, it’s not like that. His friend was trying to do some kind of BDSM thing with his partner.”

Chester chokes. Roma looks even more incredulous. “A BDSM thing? Really?”

“Unfortunately,” Obie says.

Ez rolls her eyes, but to Obie’s relief, she doesn’t look suspicious anymore. “Doesn’t sound very safe, sane, or consensual to me.”

“Well, we all know humans are stupid.”

“Hey,” Chester and Roma say at the same time.

“He’s not wrong, babe,” Ez says imperiously, and she turns back to Obie before Roma can argue. “Do we have a copy of the spell?”

“I actually requested a copy from the Deep,” Obie says, snapping open a pocket dimension and pulling out the incantation in question.

“It looks like he got the spell itself correct?—I checked it against the original text?—but he must’ve done something wrong during the pre-casting process.

And we’re not entirely sure what that ‘something’ is. ”

Roma sighs. “Figures.”