Page 46 of Take This Heart (Windy Harbor #1)

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

SPARKS IN THE DARK

GOLDIE

The sound of hammers and chain saws fills the air. I don’t mind. Every bang means we’re getting closer.

I’m on my knees arranging a fall display for outside the restaurant.

I’ve made an arch out of branches and now I’m threading flowers and lights through it.

Camden asked if I could make it look festive out here, but without the color orange.

He has something against orange, which is really inconvenient when it comes to fall decor.

I think I’m pulling it off by using every other earth tone—cream, brown, mustard, deep reds—and even pale pinks and peaches, with pampas grass and even a few dried hydrangeas that are the perfect sepia shade.

I hear the sound of tires behind me and turn, hoping it’s Milo.

I have a surprise that I’ve been waiting to give him and he’s been in Minneapolis today.

He left early this morning and it’s probably too soon for him to be back, but that doesn’t stop me from wishing.

Kevin lets out a low growl and I pet him absentmindedly to calm him.

My stomach sinks when I see Bruce Granger walking toward me.

He glances at my work like he’s smelling something rank, which isn’t true. Me and these flowers smell fucking delicious and I know for a fact this arch is looking pretty damn fabulous too.

I dust my hands on my jeans and stand, looking at him suspiciously.

He doesn’t make me wait long.

“I’ve heard from a couple of folks. People who’ve lived here long before you were born. They’re worried.”

“I’ve not heard from any of those folks, so I’m doubtful there really are any who are worried. If they are, we’ll change their minds once they taste the food and see what we’re creating here.”

“You think you’re doing something noble,” he sneers, “but you’re actually destroying what makes this place beautiful.”

“This is a tired song, Bruce. And one I don’t have time for. The restaurant’s opening in five days and we passed our inspection. You’re not at the center of this and that kills you.”

His eyes flash. That hit.

“Why don’t you admit this is over? You tried to put a stop to this and it didn’t work and you’re mad that Ava is seeing through your shit.”

He looks around, his jaw set. In the distance, a few workers laugh. Sunlight filters through my arch and it practically glows.

“This isn’t over,” he growls. “I’ll be watching and ready when everything starts falling apart. And you may have Ava fooled into believing in this fairy tale, but she’s a Granger—she’ll see through all of you.”

My heart thumps faster, but I take a step closer to him.

“This place? It’s not falling apart, it’s just going to get better and better. And like it or not, Ava is one of us too.”

He doesn’t respond. He turns and stalks back to his car. When the engine growls to life and his tires squeal out, I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

I hope my words come to pass and not his.

The sun glints off the lake, and for a moment, I let myself believe that everything hard is already behind us. That the tightness in my chest from seeing Bruce earlier has been carried off in the wind and drowned in the water.

However, I’m trying really hard to not live in denial these days. Sometimes life is hard. There’s no avoiding that. Even when so much going on around me is good, there will still be hard things.

But that’s for another day. Tonight we’re celebrating my dad. He’s finished his last round of chemo and we’re going to rejoice in that.

The house is loud before I even reach the porch. Music is playing through the outdoor speakers, laughter rises and falls like the water against the rocks, my family is all here together…life is wonderful.

Kevin barrels ahead of me, little paws flying and his tail wagging so hard, his whole back half shakes. He makes a beeline for Tully, who’s sitting in one of the Adirondack chairs. Kevin flops against his leg and looks back at Tully like I’m here, why aren’t you scratching my butt?

“There he is.” Tully laughs, ruffling the soft fur above Kevin’s fountain tail. “The king of the land.”

Kevin closes his eyes, blissed out.

“How did you manage to avoid a sweater tonight?” he whispers to Kevin.

“I got him out early before Grandma Donna could get one on him,” I whisper back.

Tully laughs.

Grayson runs up and pets Kevin.

“Whoa, hold up. Where are my hugs?” I ask.

“Hi, Auntie,” he says sweetly. “Where’s Milo?”

“He’ll be here soon,” I promise.

I walk over to hug Dad and Kevin follows me. He loves scratches, but he loves to be wherever Dad and I am more.

Dad’s eyes are bright when I pull back from our hug.

“You look good, Dad.”

“Thanks, buttercup. I feel good. Hopeful.”

“I’m so glad you’re done with chemo. So, so glad.”

“Me too, honey.” He pats my cheek, his eyes filling with tears. “Sorry, I’m an emotional old man, but I’m just so grateful. Thanks for being with me through it every step of the way.”

My lip wobbles. “Always. And you’ve earned the right to be emotional…even though you’re not an old man yet.”

He hugs me again and I sigh, beyond happy.

When Milo arrives a few minutes later, looking like a snack I want to inhale, my pulse picks up.

This time in the best way. I feel like I haven’t seen him in months instead of early this morning.

I walk toward him, grinning, and his eyes are drinking me in too, like he can’t ever get enough.

Kevin gets to him first, twirling excitedly and then pressing his back end into Milo’s shins.

“Hey, little guy.” Milo crouches to give him a thorough scratch. “It’s good to see you too.”

Since Milo’s been sleeping at the lake house, Kevin’s gotten attached to him too. He still sleeps with my dad part of the time, but most times I wake up and Kevin is curled around Milo’s legs.

Milo is a granny whisperer and a dog whisperer too.

All I need.

I walk the rest of the way and when I reach him, he straightens and pulls me in without a word. He kisses me like he’s missed me too. It’s quick, but it grounds me.

“You made it,” I say when we break apart.

“Of course. There’s no way I’d miss this.”

He looks around, taking in the low buzz of my family spread out between the house and the water, and takes my hand in his.

Kevin herds us toward everyone and we let him lead.

By the time the sky turns a dusky lavender, we’ve lit a bonfire down by the shore. My dad wanted a fire and S’mores and he’s getting whatever he wants. Grayson hands out the marshmallows to everyone, and the heat flickers across our faces as we hold our sticks above the flame.

I get lost looking at the colors of the fire.

“You okay, buttercup?” Dad asks next to me.

I think about brushing it off like I would’ve in the past. But this is my dad and I don’t want to shove my feelings down anymore.

“I’m trying to just be hopeful about your health, but you know me, I still worry. And…Bruce came by this morning, trying to stir things up.”

He huffs. “Did he threaten you?”

“Not me…more like…Windhaven.”

“He can stir all he wants.”

“You don’t sound worried.”

“I think we’re building something worthwhile and it’s rooted in love. Whatever he tries to bring our way, we still have each other. He’ll always be empty and alone unless he learns to love.”

A log pops, sending a swirl of sparks in the dark.

“Remember when we’d do these bonfires when you kids were little? It was always your mom’s idea. My brain was full of work and she’d know how to draw me out of that, how to focus on what was important. I’m grateful she taught me that.”

I blink fast, swallowing the lump rising in my throat. “I’m grateful she did too. She was such a good mom, and you’re such a good dad too.”

“Goldie, being your dad…you and your brothers’…it’s been the greatest gift I’ve known.”

I swallow back a sob and poke him in the side. “Now you’re just trying to make me cry.”

He chuckles and wipes his eyes too. “Nothing wrong with that.”

“You’re right,” I say, leaning against him.

“Hey,” I hear behind me.

I turn and it’s Ava. She hesitates at the edge of the firelight.

“You came,” I say, smiling. “Would you like a S’more?”

“No, thank you.” She smiles tentatively and walks slowly toward me. “Thanks for inviting me. Congratulations, Everett. I hope you’re feeling well.”

“Getting better all the time,” he says. “Thank you for coming.”

Kevin sniffs her toes, tail wagging in cautious approval.

“Goldie, I don’t want to take you from the party, but…I wanted to show you something,” she says.

“Oh, okay.”

I feel Milo’s eyes on me and know he’s trying to assess whether I’m okay or not. I smile and give a slight nod and his shoulders relax.

“Do you want to go inside for a few minutes?” I ask.

“That would probably be best. I’d like you to see this.” She pulls out a letter and I recognize my mom’s handwriting.

My breath hitches.

We go inside and sit at the kitchen table. It’s hard to hold back my excitement. I’m greedy for new words of my mother’s. I’ve been dying to read the letters she gave Ava, but I never would’ve asked to. She deserves to have that piece of our mom to herself.

She places the letter in front of me.

“The letters have been amazing. I feel like I’ve gotten an idea of what she was like from her letters.

” Her voice cracks. “It’s been healing and painful…

and so sad but joyful at the same time?” She lets out a nervous laugh.

“It’s been a lot, I guess, but I treasure every word I’ve been given.

” She puts her finger on the letter. “She talks about you in this one and I wanted you to read it.”

My eyes are blurry, but I nod.

My hands are shaky as I open the letter.

“I love seeing her handwriting,” I say softly.

“Me too.”

My daughter,

I’ve told you a lot of my dreams for you already, but the one on my mind today is one I’ve been hesitant to bring up. I hope that you have such a full life that what I’m about to say won’t hurt you. And maybe even if you have a full and happy life, it will still hurt you.

For that, I’m sorry.

I’ve said I have kids, but I haven’t been specific.

I have four sons and another daughter. Their names are Noah, Camden, Tully, Goldie, and Dylan. Tully and Goldie are twins.

I can tell you about all of them sometime, but today I want to talk about Goldie.

She’s eight years younger than you and is a twin, but from the time she could talk, she’s wished she had a sister too. I don’t know why I didn’t tell my kids about you. It was never because I was ashamed of you in any way, but it just hurt too much.

I still hope that one day we can find each other, and that you can get to know your brothers and sister.

I wonder all the time what you’re like. If you’re like me. If Goldie is like you.

She’s brave and stubborn and full of light. She’s my gold thread. I took one look at her and knew it. It’s why we call her Goldie. She loves hard and forgives easily and loves to paint.

I wonder what I would have named you. I thought maybe Iris, but I wanted to see you first to be sure. I wonder if you love to paint too or if you’re into designing houses like me or if you have a whole set of skills that I don’t have. I would love whatever makes you YOU. I already do.

If you meet Goldie, I hope you’ll be good friends. Nothing brings me more joy than seeing my kids love each other.

Yours,

Mom (or Stella)

Tears are dripping down my cheeks and when I look up at Ava, she’s been crying too.

There was a lot in there that got me, but her saying that I forgive easily hit home. Because I used to be that way…before Wes. I’d almost forgotten.

“She ends all her letters that way,” Ava says, laughing quietly. “Mom (or Stella).”

“Mom was never pushy.” I laugh and reach behind me for the tissues.

I hand her the box and we both blow our noses.

“Thank you for showing me that,” I manage.

“I can show you the others sometime, if you want.”

“If you’re truly okay with showing me. They’re personal, so you don’t have to.”

“I’d like to. I like hearing what you have to say about her. Like that she was never pushy. I could imagine that from the letters, but I wouldn’t know for sure without your input.”

“Then I’d love that.”

She smiles, and for the first time, it feels like the space between us is closing.