Page 58 of Sweeter than Honey
“Mom, I’m not talking about this with you right now,” I tell her. “Eli, let’s get ready for bed.”
I take Eli upstairs to give him his bath and read him to sleep. But what my mom said starts to get to me. She’s not wrong, I suppose. And the idea of ending up all alone in this suite isn’t very appealing. I’ve been so focused on leaving Dylan and setting things up for me and Eli that I never thought any further ahead.
And the truth is…Idon’t want anyone other than Renata. Now that I’ve been with her, I can’t imagine being with anyone else. This thing with us is so new, but…but it feels soreal…
Eli’s so tired from daycare that he quickly falls asleep afterThe Cuddliest Caterpillar, one of his (and my) favourite bedtime books. I can’t help remembering how Renata put him to sleep. It was so sweet to see her with him.
I close his bedroom door quietly and say good night to my mom. But I don’t want to stay here, in this quiet suite. I need to talk to someone.
And I know the perfect person to talk to.
“Two rum and cokes, please,” shouts the customer beside me at the bar. She wears a bright red bodycon dress and her curly hair is up in a tight ponytail on the top of her head, accentuating her long neck.
Should I start wearing my hair up? The Succumb club is the hotel’s speakeasy nightclub, located on a secret, underground floor that’s only accessible by the service elevator. While most people aren’t explicitly aware of the existence of magic, those in the know (or who believe the rumours) frequent this club in the hopes of attracting a real vampire. It’s a completely different vibe from the rest of the hotel. It’s dark except for the red and purple strobe lights. The oval bar is at the center of the dance floor, and there are secret booths lining the back of the club, for vampires and living humans to…well, you know…
“Coming right up,” Amara responds cheerfully, mixing the drinks behind the bar. Tonight, she wears a purple tank top and her long box braids are pulled up into a knot at the top of her head.
I wonder again if I should be wearing my hair up. Is that a vampire tip I wasn’t aware of?
Amara hands the customer her drinks and then she spots me. “Hey, Lily! Can I get you anything?”
“Hi Amara,” I say with a smile. “No thanks, I’ve got to start work after this.”
“I don’t usually see you down here,” she notes, leaning over the bar.
“I wanted to talk to you about something, if that’s ok,” I tell her nervously. I didn’t really think too much before I came down, and a part of me hopes that she’ll say she’s too busy. But the club is still quiet.The music isn’t quite ear-splittingly loud yet, and there are only a few customers, since it’s still daylight outside.
“Of course,” Amara replies brightly. She grabs a bottle of wine and pours herself a glass. “What’s going on, Lily? Is it your son?”
“No, that’s not it.” I pause, trying to get my thoughts in order.
But Amara beats me to the punch. “Is it…Renata?”
I’m glad she’s not a vampire, so she can’t see me blush in the dim crimson light. “Yeah.”
The witch nods, and takes a sip of her wine. “You’ve really got it bad for her, huh?” Amara already guessed about my feelings for Renata months ago, before I’d even fully admitted it to myself.
I exhale. “It’s just…it’s not like you and Celine. You’re both magical, and you know how to navigate things. But Renata…she’s myboss. And she can be so…”
“She’s got a wall up?” Amara asks with a grin. “Yeah, I think I know a little bit about that.”
“I thought it was just physical,” I continue. “Although that part is really nice…”
Her grin widens. “You’ve…?”
“Yeah.” Now I’m sure she can see me blush, even in the dark club. But it’s nice to be able to talk to her about this. “Only recently. But I think I might feel…evenstrongerabout her, you know?”
“I know,” Amara replies gently.
“But it’s impossible.” I shake my head. “We couldn’t be together, not properly, anyway.”
“Does she know how you feel?” Amara asks. “Maybe you should tell her.”
“Oh my god, no.” Just the idea makes me anxious. “That’s too much. Plus, I don’t even know if shelikesme, you know? She doesn’t give much away.”
“That’s true.” Amara chuckles. “Renata’s a complicated person. But I think that hard shell is protecting something. It’s not easy to be a vampire, especially an old one. The magical world is dangerous, and Tudor was a demanding Creator. I think he put a lot of pressure on Celine and Renata, so they had to be really tough in order to survive. It’s hard for them to be vulnerable. But they don’t need to be tough anymore. Or at least not as much.”
I consider her words. “That makes sense.”