Page 131 of Sweet Venom

I don’t think I’ll be able to go to class today. I’m so sore and achy all over. I remove the shirt, and my body is full of dark-purple hickeys.

Usually, I don’t like seeing my body naked, but I don’t seem to mind when Jude’s ripping my clothes off.

I stand in front of the full-length mirror and study the marks he left everywhere. My neck, collarbones, breasts, thighs, and my ass are full of hickeys, handprints, and bite and finger marks.

Damn. I look abused, but I’m blushing.

Because every mark brings back memories of how he touched me. It was rough and unapologetic and out of control, but I felt…worshiped.

And he didn’t really hurt me. He always slowed down when it started to be too much, and he could tell from just the look in my eyes.

As if he could read what I was feeling.

That’s stupid.

Jude only sees me as a tool. Whether for revenge or sex—I’m still a tool.

He’s nowhere in the bedroom, probably having left in the middle of the night like the other time.

I check my phone and there’s nothing from him.

My shoulders hunch as I trudge to the bathroom. It’snot that I expected him to stay or text, but it still tightens my chest.

It shouldn’t.

I’ve never expected anything from the men I’ve fucked and have always had zero expectations. In fact, I was glad some of them didn’t get in touch again. Some of them told their friends I was like a dead fish and that a fuck doll had more emotions than me. One guy said fucking me was creepy as fuck because I had a poker face the whole time.

Maybe it was because I didn’t feel anything.

I definitely didn’t have a poker face last night. Not when Jude made me feel him instead of seeing him, talked dirty to me, praised me, and couldn’t get enough of me.

Maybe that’s why it feels like my chest will explode. The only man I’ve ever enjoyed sex with disappeared, and I’m…

I pause brushing my teeth, my eyes widening.

No. I can’t be disappointed or hurt. I’d have to care in order to feel those emotions, and I’dnevercare about Jude Callahan. I shouldn’t have even allowed him to fuck me, let alone enjoyed it.

But somehow, I forgot all about the safe word. Like, it completely slipped my mind.

It’s probably some stupid hormones that are muddying my head. That’s all.

After I finish freshening up and spend a long time putting on a hoodie and jeans, I grab my phone and pause as a text lights up my screen.

I rush to open it, but my heart falls when I don’t see Jude’s name.

Unknown number

Heeey! It’s the one and only, theman and the legend, Preston. Got your number from Daisy. Just kidding, she said no, so I had my methods. Anyway, want to hang out?

Me

Hi, Preston. I’m not sure why you’d want to hang out with me.

Preston

Because I’m better company than Jude and Dakota combined. And I’m definitely a better fuck. Not that I’m saying we should fuck, but it’s on the table just in case.

I’ll politely decline. Thank you, though.