Page 38 of Summer in the Scottish Highlands (The Scottish Highlands #5)

‘I guessed that. Not until Natty was eighteen, and gone to university, I’ll bet.’

Faye nodded. ‘I wanted to protect Natty.’

‘And yourself.’

Faye nodded. It was true. By not committing fully to any relationship and not falling in love – Faye realised she was barely with any of the guys she’d dated long enough to get to know them properly, let alone fall in love – she was protecting herself too.

Jake sat there, holding her hand. ‘I didn’t think I’d fall in love with anybody after Eleanor.’

‘Jake, you don’t have to—’

‘I want, I need to tell you this, so you understand. Eleanor will never be the third person in our relationship, if that’s what you think.’

It had crossed Faye’s mind that if it wasn’t for the accident, Jake would still be happily married to his wife, and they would never have met. She spoke her mind, surprised when Jake vehemently shook his head.

‘Here’s the thing, Faye. The cracks were starting to appear in our marriage long before Christmas and the accident.’

‘How do you mean?’

‘If you’d asked me that question before I met you – which sounds ludicrous, I know – but if you had, although I would have had to acknowledge something wasn’t right between Eleanor and me, I couldn’t really put my finger on what it was. I can now.’

‘How come?’

‘This is still something I’m coming to terms with. I loved Eleanor, of course I did. But since meeting you, I realise it was never in the way I thought.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I’d known Eleanor practically all my life. I loved her, of course I did. But I was never in love with her.’

Faye stared at him.

‘I fell in love for the first time in my life when I met you, Faye. And … and I felt so guilty that I just couldn’t love Eleanor in the same way.

And … and then when I look back on last Christmas, when she found out she was pregnant.

I was over the moon at the thought of being a parent, but …

but she wasn’t – at least not with me. Looking back, I realise that now.

And it makes me wonder if she knew I was never in love with her. ’

‘But how would she have known that? Unless …’ Faye trailed off.

‘Unless …?’

‘Sorry, never mind.’

Jake stared at her. ‘Unless she didn’t love me either – not in that way.’

Faye pursed her lips. She’d been thinking something else – just like Jake had fallen in love, had Eleanor fallen in love with someone else too? Faye certainly was not going to voice that thought.

‘You know, when I was abroad working in Washington for a time, she stayed behind in London, alone. She didn’t enjoy following me around being a corporate wife.

She wanted a career of her own. She was looking at starting a business.

When I returned from Washington, she went up to Scotland for a time – Edinburgh – said she was looking into starting her business. ’

‘In Edinburgh? ’

‘No, I don’t think so. I presumed she was up there looking for materials and ideas. To be honest, I didn’t get involved. Although I remember we did argue about it. I didn’t want her to go.’

‘But she went anyway.’

He nodded. ‘But when she got back, she seemed … different.’

Faye thought that could have been to do with going away, having some independence for a time, although she suspected it was more than that – a lot more.

Faye wanted to change the subject. What good would it do him if he were to find out she had met someone, and she’d had an affair? Although if that had happened, she couldn’t see how he’d find out about it unless someone came forward.

Faye took his other hand in hers. ‘Why don’t we let sleeping dogs lie, eh?

The accident happened, and Eleanor … well, whatever went on before in your marriage, it’s all in the past now.

’ Faye wanted him to move on. It was very selfish of her, she knew, but then again, if Jake was going to have a life with them, he had to.

‘Let sleeping dogs lie …’ Jake cast his eyes up to the mountain beyond the house.

Faye followed his gaze, remembering what Duncan had said in the shop when he’d told her some things about the skiing accident at Christmas that Jake hadn’t long found out himself.

Jake dropped his gaze. ‘I can’t. I didn’t tell you this before, but there was someone else up there on the mountain with us when the accident happened. Well, two people, actually.’

Jake went on to tell her about the guy who had taken his own life. ‘Sorry, not the nicest subject to bring up during our date, is it?’

That was what Duncan had mentioned to her in the shop.

In the spring, when the snow had thawed, a body had been discovered, along with an abandoned car in a car park.

The poor man on the mountain had shot himself.

Duncan had mentioned that the man had paid for a car parking ticket, which he said was rather strange for someone who was about to take their own life.

But it was how they had been able to pinpoint his time of death – that and the gunshot people had heard at that time.

However, Faye didn’t think it was strange at all – getting a parking ticket.

The poor guy clearly wasn’t in his right mind.

‘And there was some other person up there off-piste too,’ said Jake. They must have phoned the emergency services. It’s how we were found so quickly. The strange thing is that they never came forward to take any credit for saving us.’

‘Perhaps they didn’t want any recognition and were just content with knowing they’d saved lives that day.’

Jake shrugged. ‘I guess. But I’d still like to know who both of them were.’

‘Oh, you don’t know?’

Jake shook his head. ‘I’ve been meaning to talk to David, or Joe, ask them if they heard who they were. But at the party it didn’t seem appropriate.’

Faye stared at Jake. Was it appropriate to tell him the identity of one of them now?

She didn’t know who the guy was who had saved them, but Duncan had found out who the poor guy was who’d lost his life on the mountain on Christmas Day – it was a former employee of the Ross Corporation.

Duncan had found a small newspaper article in a local paper.

The man had been fired from the Ross Corporation on Christmas Eve.

Faye had no idea why he’d been fired, but losing a well-paid job like that, especially at Christmas, would have been bound to send someone into a spin – or worse; they might even consider doing what he’d done .

‘Jake, look about what happened on that mountain …’

‘No, let’s not talk about it anymore, please Faye.’

‘But—’

‘I’ll get around to seeing David at some point. And I have a feeling Bonnie knows something.’

‘How do you mean?’

‘She was avoiding me at the party – I just know it.’

‘Jake, she wasn’t avoiding you. She wasn’t really talking to anybody, apart from David. She must have been so embarrassed, feeling as though she’d deceived her friends, even though it wasn’t her fault she’d believed she was Robyn. I bet it will take time to get over that.’

‘Even so, I still think she knows something about Eleanor that she hasn’t revealed for some reason.’

Faye cocked her head to one side. ‘I thought you said you didn’t want to talk about it anymore?’

‘No, you’re right. I don’t. Not right now. In fact, I’m not sure how we got on to the subject of the accident – do you?’

Faye did. They had been talking about letting sleeping dogs lie.

She would be happy to do that. But whatever had really happened up on the mountain, Faye knew Jake couldn’t let it go.

She didn’t know what good it would do, but she’d promised Duncan she’d tell Jake about what he’d discovered.

Jake was right, though: this wasn’t the time or the place.

He’d gone to so much trouble to make their date extra-special.

She glanced at the tents. It wasn’t just extra-special, it was so unexpected – the al fresco meal and the tents set up like they were on an expedition in some far-flung part of the world, in an age where travel really was a great big adventure.

She did not want anything from his past spoiling their first ever date together.