Page 78 of Submitting to Them

Revenge?Shit.My throat goes tight as I imagine what he could mean by that, exactly.But maybe if I can keep him talking, I can get him to back down, change his mind.I used to have sex with this guy.Maybe he never considered me his girlfriend like I considered him my boyfriend, but we were intimate.As disgusting as the thought of it is to me now, it has to count for something, right?

“This is kidnapping, Joel.”

Shrugging, he says, “Wouldn’t be the first time.”

He means Kristin.“Right,” I say.“But what’s your end-game?”

“Just shut up, okay?”

“I really need to know—”

“Shut!Up!”he yells, spittle flying from his mouth to fleck on the steering wheel.

I flinch back into my seat.“Sorry.”

He grunts again, his eyes on the road ahead.It’s dark outside, so all I see are headlights and taillights, and the shine of polished cars reflecting all those lights.On either side of us are stores and apartment buildings.There are even people on the sidewalk.My fingers twitch next to the window control.

“Don’t fucking think about it,” Joel says.“I will shoot you and drop your body in the desert.”

“Please, Joel.”

“Do not say another word until we’re out of the city.”

Maybe I could throw myself out of the car.Would I get anywhere before he can shoot me?

We’re approaching a stoplight.The light’s green, but it’s some distance away.

He’s going to have to stop.I’ll get out then.

The light turns yellow.The car in front of us slows.

“Goddammit!”Joel shouts, banging his fist on the steering wheel.“You could’ve fuckinggone, you fuckingidiot!”

Road rage.So attractive.I ease my hand along the side of the door, searching for the release.

Impact explodes across my jaw.

I cry out in surprise, fear, and the sharp pain that is already beginning to throb.

Joel hit me.He fuckinghitme.

“You made me do that, you bitch!You reached for the door handle, I saw you.”

“Okay, okay!Okay, I’m sorry.”Agony moves throughout my jaw as I talk.I cup my cheek in my hand.The coolness of my palm eases the burning pain.

Tears well in my eyes.Despite the gun, despite knowing he was at least partially responsible for Kristin’s kidnapping, despite the way he filmed and released a sex tape of us without my consent, despite the way he cheated on me…I don’t know.I guess I never thought he would hit me.

Is he messed up in the head enough to shoot me?

He told me to be quiet until we get out of the city.I’m quiet.All I hear is the pounding of my heart, the purr of the car’s engine, and my own ragged breathing.

My mind is whirling.How did this even happen?Kingston texted, told me to get out.He said the bodyguards were compromised and not to tell them I was leaving.

After what feels like an eternity, the city is behind us.

“I thought it was Kingston texting me,” I say in a tentative, quiet voice.“But it wasn’t—it was you.Did you steal his phone?”

I don’t know how that would even be possible—I’d just been talking to Kingston.But maybe Kingston lost his phone and called me from his office phone instead, and I didn’t notice.