Page 63 of Submitting to Them

I shouldn’t do this.I promised myself I’d stop giving him money.But the dark purple bruises on his jaw, his black eye, and the general miasma of despair surrounding my brother tugs on my heartstrings.

Retrieving the cash, I hold it out toward Tommy.When he reaches for it, I yank it away.

“What are you doing?”he asks.

“This money is for food, and clothes,” I say.

He nods.

“It’s not to gamble with.You have enough here to clean yourself up, get a good meal, get an interview outfit.Nice slacks and a button-up shirt.Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“You will go to the library and start filling out applications right after this.”

“Jeez, who’s the older sibling?”he asks.

“Me, apparently.”I hand him the money.

He hugs me goodbye.If no money had changed hands, would my brother give me a hug?

Impossible to know.

As soon as I’m done with my shift, I ask Cora and Terrence to take me straight to the bank where I withdraw four twenties from the ATM.It’s going directly onto Kingston’s table when I get home.

Tommy might be comfortable taking my boyfriends’ money, but I’m not.

Fifteen

Kingston

The chat with Detective Baldwin goes well, although I can’t tell how much weight he’s putting into Ella’s recording or our subsequent suspicions.Baldwin seems suspicious that she would’ve just coincidentally ended up seated near them at a bistro.

To me, it’s less a coincidence and more a lucky break.Sometimes shit happens that way.

More productive is my phone call with Ironwood.Even though it’s a Saturday, I barely have time to take the call, and I feel like my company is falling down around me despite everyone else’s efforts to keep it running.

Is this what I can expect when I finally step down as CEO?Who’s going to be able to handle this place?

Still, I get through the day.Ella texts me a selfie where she’s grinning with her two guards.She captions the photo #BFFs, and I chuckle.She’s so damn cute.

As I leave the office, I pause at the Kristin’s door.I hope she’s all right.She could be a friend, now that the weird flirtatious bullshit has been cleared up.

But she can’t be a friend if we don’t get her back, and I’m fearing that too much time has gone by.When I spoke with Detective Baldwin, I was getting the sense that although he isn’t giving up, a lot of the urgency has passed.New emergencies and mysteries arise every day.

Kristin, eventually, is going to be forgotten.

And that’s not fucking fair.

The rest of the day passes quickly, and the sun is falling by the time I get back to my penthouse.It’s a low bar, but I’m pleased that I’m getting home in time for dinner—Bash has a dinner meeting with a potential new agent, and I don’t want Ella to feel lonely at my place by herself.

When I walk in, I find Ella curled up on the sofa with her phone.I drop my wallet and phone on the table by the elevator and notice some cash lying there.

“What’s this?”I ask.

“Oh, that’s the change from the other day, when I picked up lunch during our visit with Bash.”

“Right,” I say.I’d forgotten all about it.