Page 18 of Stuck With My Rockstar Boss (Soul Sounds Brothers #4)

Lucas and I curl up in the back of the bus on the sprawling couch under a blanket.

It’s the only place big enough to lay out this way with someone else.

We’ve enjoyed each other about three times over at this point and now that the guilt is gone, it feels even better than before.

We can take our time and relish in how it feels to be with each other, rather than knowing it’s dangerous. That it’s wrong.

No.

It’s right.

“I think I wanna start therapy,” Lucas says, his voice ragged and tired.

I brush my fingers against his arm and lift my head from his chest. “Yeah?”

His lips twist. “I mean… I don’t know.”

I smile at him softly. “I think that’d be great for you. I think that’d help a lot.”

His tired green eyes roll over to mine. Barely twelve hours into our relationship and I already feel the possibility of a lifetime of moments in bed like this. “I don’t know if I could do it. Sit there with a stranger and tell them all my problems. Sounds like a panic attack waiting to happen.”

I touch his face gently. “I’ll go with you if you want.”

His eyebrows jump. “Would you?”

“Of course I would. Until you get comfortable with them. You know, it might be good. Then we can even figure out how to transition me out of the role of security blanket into girlfriend.”

“You’re not a security blanket, you’re–”

“Kidding, kidding,” I interrupt. “A joke. A bad joke.” I run my fingers through his hair and Lucas immediately groans, eyes fluttering shut. “You like that.”

He nods heavily and pushes his head into the crook of my neck.

“You’re like a cat.”

Lucas laughs. “Meow.”

I laugh too and kiss the crown of his head.

The smell of his hair is divine. Sandalwood and bergamot.

I’m struck that I could stay here forever.

I never have to leave now if I don’t want to.

He’s mine. All the days of pretending, of pulling him out of a crowd under the guise I’m his girlfriend. That’s real now.

“I’ll do whatever you need to make you feel safe, baby,” I whisper.

Lucas just presses a chaste kiss to the hollow of my collarbone and sighs. “I love you.”

Today, we have both promised to protect each other. To make sacrifices for each other. To love each other when everyone says not to. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. To be chosen above all other things.

And I would choose him again and again. Everyday.

§

“Houston!”

The crowd erupts.

“Holy shit,” Lucas says with a grin. “Houston!”

They scream again, more intense this time.

“Will you do that every time I say your name?” he says, crossing the stage to take in the crowd.

He’s wearing an airy, white button down open down to his navel tucked into some leather pants.

He’s like a very sexy pirate, just needs an earring and maybe an eyepatch.

“Cause, Houston… I’ll be saying your name a lot tonight. ”

Again. The screaming. It would be monotonous if it didn’t feel so good.

Lucas recenters himself downstage. “This next song has been a favorite amongst our audiences, I think. It involves a very, very special person.”

There are gasps through the crowd.

“I’m sure you’ve all seen online…”

Some girlish, excitable shrieks.

“Mika Robertson, could you come downstage, please?”

Saccharine coos from the crowd, like it’s a middle school assembly.

I wave them off and shout, “Don’t be mushy!

” but only the first few rows can probably hear me.

Contracts were still in flux up until call time and we almost thought we wouldn’t be able to do tonight’s show which would have been fucking horrible considering this is the closing concert of the “Soul Sounds at Twenty” tour.

It just would have been sad to not play their hometown, the one they were touting as “best for last”.

Lucas smiles crookedly at me. “Anyway, we’ve got a pretty special song for you, but first – “

I feel myself blushing before he even starts explaining to the crowd what we’re doing. I almost feel like telling him to nix the whole thing and let’s just sing the song. But it’s too late. We have to go through with it.

“We have a request,” he says with a smile. “Guys?”

Jay speaks first into his backup mic. “Mika needs a little help and while she’s too proud to beg, we aren’t.”

“Boo…” Chase cries from behind the kit.

“You’re just mad you didn’t think of it,” Jay grins.

Chase scoffs and then adds, “Mika’s a beloved member of the Soul Sounds fam and her family is in danger of losing their home if they don’t come up with some money.”

“And fast. So–” Dylan picks up. “We told her we knew some of the coolest, greatest people in the world who might be willing to lend a hand.” He opens his arms and gestures to the audience. “You guys.”

The audience cheers. I can’t even look up at them, I’m so embarrassed. Who would have thought that I can sing for thousands of people but asking for a little help would be so embarrassing?

Lucas inches closer to me. “Now, aside from being my…” He looks at me with innocent eyes, whispering into the mic, “Can I say it out loud?”

I laugh. “Sure.”

“Now, aside from being my girlfriend–”

Squeals from the audience. I beam ear to ear.

“Mika is the fucking coolest. She’s the best tour guide, she’s hilarious, she takes no shit, and she’s smart and compassionate and…”

“I think you get the idea,” I say into my mic.

Lucas admonishes me with a bump to the hip.

“Anyway. This is how it’s going to work.

Up on the screen, you’re going to see a username on Venmo.

That’s Mika’s. We have a PR person running the account who will be tracking every donation received.

Each account that donates will get you entered in an exclusive raffle to have a special, one-of-a-kind meet and greet with Soul Sounds. ”

The audience cheers and phone screens are already flipping on. This is fucking wild.

“So, donate from your account, from your friend’s account, from your boyfriend’s account, from your dad’s account because dads, I know you’re out there!” Lucas adds. “This girl is incredible, and she deserves it. You got a dollar, she’ll take a dollar!”

“I’m not bigger than a dollar!” I cry playfully into the mic.

“You got five, she’ll take five!”

“Even better!”

“Whatever you got,” Lucas says, his smile glimmering.

His stage persona fades away for a moment as he watches the audience, takes in the hubbub of people shuffling about and talking amongst themselves.

It’s gratitude on his face, so soft and humble.

“Houston, you’re my favorite. You always will be. ” He turns to me and mouths, You ready?

I nod and give a look over my shoulder to Jay. He grins at me and begins the song. I’ve gotten so used to his warm-toned, resonant playing. It’s almost like a home.

My eyes return to Lucas. And they do not leave for the rest of the song. ‘Vicky’ has been different every time we’ve sung it together. Hot and fiery, lush and desperate, lonely and dark. It’s a testament to their songwriting, but I think it’s also a testament to us.

This time, at the climax of the song, neither of us can keep from smiling. We are locked in place, facing each other in a tight spotlight. We trade off lines, countering each other like we always do.

Lucas leading, If I leave you, I’ll die.

Me following, If you love me I’ll lie

And he continues, So Mika, never let me go, I’ll be your guy.

The crowd screams bloody murder at the lyric change and I’m so taken off-guard that I miss my next line. The band suspends playing and lets everyone take it in, including me. I just want to kiss him and that’s just what I do. I leap forward and wrap my arms around his neck, knowing he’ll catch me.

I can feel his smile under my lips, relish in the way the crowd embraces us with their applause and thrill. The band picks up where they left off and ‘Vicky’ ends instrumentally, with Crystal and Lee singing their distant, haunting backup parts.

When our lips part, Lucas doesn’t pull away completely, holds me there in his arms. “Ken’s gonna hate this.”

I giggle and push my forehead to his. “Good.”

Lucas returns to his mic and announces, “Well. I hope you folks didn’t mind the little improvisation there. Round of applause for Mika Robertson,” he says, as he usually does at the end of our duet

The crowd warmly celebrates my performance. I nod to them with thanks.

“Can we get an update on our donations?” Lucas asks, looking offstage.

I’ve completely forgotten about that between the song and the kiss.

I feel my face get hot as one of the roadies rushes on and whispers something in Lucas’s ear.

Lucas’s mouth drops and his eyes widen. “You’re kidding,” he says and the mic picks it up.

“You guys! I knew you’d come through for our girl, but shit . That shattered our goal and then some.”

The number flashes up on the screens and the number of zeroes has me flabbergasted. Tears well into my eyes and I can’t keep from crying right there onstage in front of thousands of people. “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe it,” I mutter into my hands.

The band crowds around me. I am embraced by their warmth and their love. This is surreal. I never thought I’d be able to experience relief in this way. That maybe my parents and the house wouldn’t be a constant worry plaguing every choice I make.

“Say something, baby,” Lucas says softly in my ear and hands me his mic.

I nervously step out of the circle of their safety and face the audience.

Alone in the light. I’ve never stood here without Lucas.

But I don’t feel scared. “You have no idea what this means to me. We’re all strangers to each other and yet so many of you have made the choice to put that aside to give me something.

It’s not just money,” I say with a wistful smile, tears rolling down my face.

“You have all given me the ability to choose freedom. Freedom in what I do. In whom I love.” I glance over at Lucas who is leaned up against the amps with Dylan.

Dylan nudges him and Lucas smiles bashfully.

“I wish I could give that all back to you in such a tangible way. But I think what we really owe all of you is the music. So, guys. Fuck it up.”

Houston eats this up like it’s the last donut in the box.

They’re wild, they’re feral. And what ensues is three more hours of tremulous, hard rock.

The guys play songs they haven’t all tour, they improvise, they goof off.

This audience is getting a show they’ll never forget and we are giving them everything we have.

From time to time, Lucas returns his gaze to me. I can’t help but look back with all the love in the world. He’s given me something no one has even come close to. It’s not the money, but the gesture. I can’t let a man that wants me to be this safe and loved go.

Never, ever, ever.