Page 22 of Stone (Claimed and Protected #3)

D aniella

“Fuck!”

Stone was convulsing, his entire body electrified. The sound of his deep cries had awakened me, the fear gripping my heart instantly. The early morning light barely accentuated his supine body. On edge, I scanned the room, half expecting to see armed assailants bursting in through the door.

Seeing no one, I moved toward the couch, instantly crouching down and touching Stone’s face.

“Hey. Are you okay?” I’d heard his moans from my room.

His eyes were still rolling back and forth behind his closed eyelids and his muscles were twitching.

“Stone. Wake up.” As I caressed his face, tickling sensations drifted down my arm from the stubble covering his chin.

He hadn’t shaved since he’d rescued me and in the early morning light, his disheveled appearance was terribly sexy.

He tossed his head, flailing his arms, still deep in sleep.

Every word he murmured frightened me.

“No! They were babies… No. No. I killed children. I fucking killed…”

“Stone. You need to wake up. Come on, honey.” His body stiffened and I wasn’t expecting his immediate reaction.

He snapped his hand around my wrist, yanking my hand from his face. His eyes were completely unfocused at first when they opened. He issued an intense snarl, yanking half my body over his.

“Stone. It’s me. It’s Dani.” He was scaring me, not because I believed he’d hurt me, but because his nightmare was so vivid.

His chest rose and fell and his entire face was pinched. With his wild eyes, I couldn’t tell if he had any indication of where he was. He wouldn’t stop shaking and his fingers were cutting off the circulation in my arm.

“Stone,” I whispered, but he still wasn’t responding.

I knew enough about PTSD to realize he was locked in a frenzied state of mind, a dream sparked by a real-life moment that had nearly crushed his psyche. While I was no expert, my instinct told me I had to try to draw him out of the fog as quickly as possible.

So I kissed him. I crushed my lips against his and stroked his arm with my other hand, delicately brushing my fingers across his skin.

He didn’t respond at first, his entire body remaining rigid, locked in whatever night terror he was going through.

I could feel his wildly beating heart and that frightened me even more.

What if he was experiencing a heart attack?

I pressed his lips open with mine, realizing his teeth were tightly clenched together. With every muscle so rigid, his body was jerking as if being electrocuted.

My hand was numb from his hold, my arm aching, but I continued kissing him as I stroked his chest. The fear remained high and I had a terrible feeling he wasn’t coming out of the hallucination.

Slowly, his breathing became less labored, his jaws unclenching so I managed to slide my tongue inside.

His fingers released, relieving the pressure, and the heavy tension faded.

Without forewarning, he pulled me off the floor until I was nestled against his warm body. As his breathing continued to slow, he rolled one hand down my back.

The man had become an indomitable force to be reckoned with, men refusing to get in his way. I’d considered him larger than life, which was why seeing him crippled by whatever demon he’d brought back from his time serving his country was heartbreaking.

Our moment of intimacy wasn’t destined to last; when he became entirely conscious, his body stiffened.

He gripped my arms, gently but firmly pushing me back. His eyes had always been piercing, but in the hazy light of early morning, they were defining and disturbing.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Trying to awaken you. You were having a nightmare.”

His chest continued to rise and fall, but he was slowly drifting more into consciousness. “I’m fine. You didn’t need to worry.”

“You were talking about someone dying. A child?”

“I said…” He raised his voice then instantly gritted his teeth, even turning his head away from me. “I’m fine. Really. Just a nightmare. I get them from time to time.” With another gentle yet forceful push, he eased me off his body and the couch, instantly sitting up.

I backed away, rising to my feet, but still standing over him. “How long have you had them?”

With his elbows on his knees, he slowly dropped his head into his hands. “Long enough to know I’m fine.”

“You didn’t seem fine, Stone. You were completely out of it. What were you dreaming about?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“I think it does. You’re clammy, still shaking. Is this about something you experienced in the Navy?”

He was still taking ragged yet deep breaths. “Just leave it alone.”

“Have you talked to someone about them? A professional? There are experts who deal with PTSD and can help you. But I think at least if you talk about what you remember, maybe that will help,”

“Dani!” he snapped and jerked to his feet. “I’m fine. Just let it go.” He blew past me, heading into the kitchen.

Maybe I should leave him alone, but I knew when someone was suffering and his memories were attacking his mind. I’d seen the darkness on his face when he’d opened fire on the bastards who’d kidnapped me. I’d sensed the rage had almost gotten out of control. A part of him was a ticking timebomb.

I followed him, remaining in the doorway, yet determined to get him to talk. He was busy with the Keurig machine, smashing his finger on the button and waiting as the unit began to heat.

His hands were pressed on the counter, his arms remaining rigid.

When he tipped his head over his shoulder, I sensed he knew I wasn’t going to allow him to go through this by himself. He laughed, although the sound was hollow. “Why can’t you just leave it alone?”

“Because you’re hurting and that hurts me.”

“We’ve already established that you don’t know me any longer, Dani.

You don’t know what I’ve been through, the horrors I witnessed.

You have no understanding of what it’s like to suffer while others thrive or when you’re forced to watch someone you care about die right in front of you and there is nothing you can do to save him.

” He slammed a coffee pod into the machine, smashing the lever down.

“A fellow SEAL?”

“Oh, fuck. Yeah, a couple. It’s to be expected, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t tear you apart.”

He was masking the real reason for the nightmare, although I knew what he was saying was true. “I’m sorry about your team members.”

“Yeah. Me too. Good guys.”

While he reached into the cabinet, I took a few steps closer. “I also know what it’s like to lose someone you care about.”

He snorted and thrust the mug on the counter with enough force I was shocked the ceramic didn’t shatter. “Not the same thing as seeing a bullet penetrating a man’s brain.”

“That’s why I think you need to talk to someone. You can talk to me if you want. I’m not going to judge you. I care about you and don’t want you to live this way.”

“You won’t judge me? That’s good because if you did, you’d either consider me a heinous bastard or a criminal.”

“That’s not true. You did what you were required to do.” I sensed his exasperation increasing.

“Getting women and children killed? Being solely responsible for their deaths?”

The biting words hung in the air.

I pressed my fingers against my mouth.

“Is that the kind of thing you’d like to chat about over breakfast?” The hissing sound as the coffee finished brewing captured both our attention for a few seconds.

“If that’s what you want to talk about. I’m right here. You’ve told me I’m not going anywhere, so why not allow me to be your friend?”

His grumbling continued as he reached into the refrigerator, grabbing a carton of half and half. He poured some into his mug then slammed the still open carton onto the counter. The force made me jump. Why was he so angry with me? No, that wasn’t the truth. He was furious with himself.

He was suffering and I’d never seen him this way, not even when my father had been giving him hell for nothing more than being my boyfriend. But I refused to back down, walking closer until I crowded his space.

“Talking about what I experienced isn’t going to make anything better. Just fucking leave it like I told you.”

“Should I be afraid of you, Stone? Is that why you’re pushing me away?”

With his shoulders heavy, he shook his head, saying nothing. The seconds ticked by. “Goddamn it, Dani.”

“What do you want me to say, Stone? I’m just trying to help you.” My eyes flew up from the ripple in his back to the long arc of his neck to the intense flare of his sea-green eyes.

“Well, how about this? Mind your own goddamn business.” He swept his arm across the counter, knocking both the mug of hot coffee and the carton of cream aside.

The cup hit my leg, scalding coffee splashing on my skin before the mug took a tumble to the floor, smashing into dozens of pieces around my feet.

The carton spewed cream across my chest before falling to the floor, still dripping as it fell.

Shock tore through me seconds before pain from the instant burn. Just as I started to lunge forward in my bare feet, Stone rushed toward me, instantly pulling me into his arms.

“Oh, fuck. Oh, my God. Dani. Dani.” His entire body was shaking as much as mine and he rushed me into the bathroom, throwing open the shower curtain.

Gasping, I clung to his neck as tears formed in my eyes.

“Hold on, baby. Just hold on.” Frantic, he held me tightly while reaching down to turn on the water. “Okay. I’m putting your leg in the water. Okay. I’ll hold you.” He eased me into the shower, immediately jumping in behind me.

I couldn’t stop shaking, the pain turning into agony as my skin reddened.

With his arm firmly placed around my waist, he cupped his other hand under the water, grabbing handfuls and tenderly splashing the burned area.

“Ouch. That… hurts.” I gritted my teeth and my voice was shaking.

While I tried to hold them back, the tears wouldn’t stop falling.

The emotional release wasn’t merely about the agony or the shock from his explosive reaction.

It was also from the horrible realization he’d had a part of him ripped away by war and death.

He refused to let go, constantly splashing the burn.

“I’m okay,” I managed a minute or two later, although wincing when I tried to put my weight on the leg.

Saying the words didn’t make them true. I crossed my arms, burying my nails into my biceps to create a different level of pain.

His breathing was as heavy as mine. Dear God, we were a hot mess together.

“No, you’re not okay, Dani, and it’s my fault. I can’t believe I hurt you.” His dark tone slid through every pore, resting deep within my core. “Yeah. You should be afraid of me. You need to stay away from me.”

The tears burned my eyes. When he noticed them, he cursed under his breath.

“No, Stone. I’ll never be afraid of you.” Because I love you. I stopped short of telling him.

As I nuzzled against his chest, my thoughts drifted to ones that were completely inappropriate for the moment.

Very slowly he turned me around to face him, keeping one arm around my waist and cupping my face with the other. “You need to believe me that I would never want to hurt you. Not in a thousand years.”

He was so close his heated breath tickled the skin on my neck.

There was no reason to be nervous around him, but I was and had been since he’d crashed his way into the warehouse.

I placed my hand on his chest, trying to smile even though I knew I’d done a piss poor job of making the incident seem like no big deal.

“It’s okay. Really.” He was dangerously close, enough so our rapid breathing now had little to do with my injury or his outburst. His gaze was locked with mine and for a few seconds, we were entrenched in a quiet moment that neither one of us knew what to do with.

“I think you can turn the water off now.”

My suggestion broke the spell and he nodded, still holding onto me as he leaned over and turned the spigot. “Let’s get you into some clothes. I’m taking you to a doc-in-a-box.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, I am and you’re not arguing with me.”

“I’ll argue with you if I want since I’m an adult.”

At least he allowed a momentary smile before his expression returned to a more serious look of concern. “Well, this is my house, which means if you won’t cooperate, then I’ll take you just like you are in your cute little fluorescent pink PJs. It’s entirely up to you which you’d prefer.”

He just had to look sexy with his tousled hair and unshaven face, so I couldn’t refuse him.

And I had no chance of shutting the lid on Pandora’s Box ever again.

“Fine. I’ll get changed.”