Page 1 of Splintered Memories (Ember Hollow Romance #2)

Emersyn

Six Years Old

M y tummy cramped, twisting in on itself. I thought I’d gotten used to the feeling, but hunger vibrated up my spine. My mouth filled with saliva as the lingering smell of dinner wafted into my dark room.

The sounds of clinking dishes and the splash of water met my ears as Mommy started on the dishes.

I screwed my eyes closed, rolling my lips between my teeth and biting down hard enough to distract me from the thought of food.

I counted to ten, and then tried to count backward from ten, but it was hard and I gave up.

“Emy?”

At my sister’s soft whisper, my eyelids snapped open. I turned my head. Delainey knelt next to my bed, her face shrouded in shadow, but enough light leaked in from my open door to make out her expressions.

She let out a sigh of relief. “I thought you were asleep. ”

I shook my head, my eyes flaring wide. “What are you doing in here?” I hissed. My gaze shifted to the open door. “If Mommy finds you in here—”

Delainey cut me off with a shake of her head. “It’s okay.” She shifted, pulling something from her pocket. “Here.” She pushed it into my hand. “It’s a little squished, but it’ll taste fine.”

My heartbeat quickened. I swallowed hard, my stomach twisting again. It was a biscuit. “Lainey,” I whispered in both relief and fear. “You can’t take food from the table.”

Delainey’s mouth set into a hard line. “So?”

“You’ll get in trouble…”

“I don’t care.” She threw back her shoulders. “Eat it quick.”

I stared at the biscuit, desperately wanting it, but also terrified of it. “Mommy will know.”

Delainey huffed. “No, she won’t. Not if you eat fast.”

I didn’t know whether I believed her or not. Mommy always seemed to know everything. My eyes burned uncomfortably as tears welled. I wasn’t sure why they had come, but they spilled down my cheeks before I could stop them.

Delainey reached for me, her warm hands soothing down my hair. “Don’t cry, Emy.”

I shook my head. “Do you think Jake will be okay?” My voice broke on our big brother’s name. “It’s so cold outside.” I wasn’t the only one being punished right now.

Delainey stiffened before giving me a curt nod. “Yeah,” she said, but her voice was too tight to be comforting. “He always is. ”

“It was snowing yesterday…” I trailed off, thinking of my poor brother outside in the cold backyard. “She doesn’t even give him a blanket or pillow.”

My sister gritted her teeth. “He’ll be okay. Dad will be home tomorrow night.”

My chest eased, but only a little. Daddy wasn’t home a lot, but Mommy never did the worst things when he was around.

And Jake always seemed to get the worst of the punishments—of the discipline—and I hated it. A fresh wave of tears gushed from my eyes. “I’m—I’m scared.”

“Don’t be scared.” Delainey gestured toward the biscuit. “Just eat. It’ll make you feel better.”

“I’m not hungry.” I was, but I didn’t deserve the biscuit. I just wanted to cry.

My older sister grabbed for my free hand, squeezing tight.

Her eyes met mine, and they were hard and heated.

“Emy,” she said, voice fervent. “You are hungry and you will eat. I already took it, and if it doesn’t get eaten, Mommy will find out what I did.

There’s no point in leaving it.” She leaned in closer.

“And stop crying.” She didn’t sound mean but was firm. “She likes it when we cry.”

I shivered, but I couldn’t stop the tears. “I don’t know how.” My frail voice shuddered on a sob.

“I know that it’s hard, Emy. Just try.” She pointed to my chest. “Hold it all right here. Don’t let it loose.”

I didn’t understand. My head whipped back and forth. “I can’t.”

“You can. You know when that lump rises in your throat?”

I blinked at her and slowly nodded.

“And you know that burning feeling that comes with it? ”

I nodded again.

My sister fisted her hand and held it against her own chest. “I imagine it as a big ball of fire that I have to keep locked down inside. I pretend that I can catch it right in my hand and hold it down before it gets to my throat.”

I stared at her hand closed tight in the middle of her chest.

“If you keep that ball of fire right here before it gets up your throat, you can keep the tears inside and she won’t know how much she’s hurting you.”

My eyes widened. More tears threatened to surface, but this time, I made the effort to fight.

Closing my eyes, I pretended that hot, burning feeling inside my chest was a red ball of flames.

I pretended that my hand was wrapping around the ball and clutched it hard, pulling it down into a cold, dark place where the fire couldn’t burn me.

I let out a slow, long exhale.

“There you go. You got it,” Delainey said, and I opened my eyes. She smiled at me.

My eyes still ached and watered, but the tears stopped. “I’m tired,” I breathed.

“Eat first,” Delainey said softly, pointing toward the squished biscuit I’d forgotten was in my other hand.

I stared at the food, no longer hungry for it.

But Delainey was right. It had to be eaten.

She’d already risked taking it. Slowly, I lifted the biscuit to my mouth, but the slight squeak of the floorboard outside of my room stopped me.

I reflexively shoved my hand under the bed covers, tucking the food under my body as her voice drifted inside.

“Delainey?” Mommy tilted her head to the side as she examined the two of us. “What are you doing in your sister’s room, honey?”

My sister’s expression barely shifted under Mommy’s gaze, but a slight glint of fear flashed in her eyes. “I’m saying goodnight.”

Her voice didn’t waver. She was so strong, and my admiration of her grew inside my chest.

Mommy’s lips tightened. “Go to your room, baby. You know your sister is still dealing with the consequences of her actions.”

Delainey didn’t hesitate. She didn’t spare me another look. She only stood. “Yes, Mommy.” She headed toward the door and slipped out.

Mommy watched her until Delainey made it to her room, no doubt, before her gaze shifted back to me.

My heart pounded so hard against my ribs it hurt.

She took a step inside. The biscuit under my covers suddenly felt like it was going to burst into flames and give me away.

Would she be able to smell it? I swallowed back the fear racing up my throat as she came to my bed and sat down on the edge.

I imagined that fist inside me, holding onto the fear and tugging it back down into my chest.

“Emersyn.” Mommy leaned over me, her sharp eyes boring into mine.

I should’ve eaten the biscuit first. So stupid. She was going to find it and Delainey would be punished, too. Sweat prickled on the back of my neck.

“Yes, Mommy?” I said, surprised my voice sounded so firm.

Her eyes were assessing as she stared down at me. I imagined that fist gripping tighter around my fear, forcing it down, down, down…

Eventually, Mommy let out a long sigh. Then, she pressed a kiss to my forehead. “You know I only discipline you for your own good, right?”

I forced myself to nod .

“You have to learn that you are not permitted to act like that.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, automatically. It had been so long now I couldn’t remember what I had been punished for.

“I know you are. That’s good.” She smiled, but it was lifeless and cold. “It’ll be over soon.”

“Okay.”

“I love you, Emersyn Susanne.”

I almost lost the battle against the fireball in my chest, my pretend fist loosening as the burning in my eyes returned. “I love you, Mommy.”

But it was never over with her. There was always something more. There was always a next time.

We just had to pray that we would survive the next time.