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Part Three

Desperation, Destruction, Regrets, and Redemption

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Tari

A SH AND FINN HAD A tearful reunion with Cassandra as she was leaving the dungeon. They told her everything that had happened in Caldaria, including Helian becoming king and the devastation of the shifter stronghold. She held her sons, crying with them before reluctantly pulling away, explaining that she had to return to interpreting the book of spells.

We continued through the dungeon, passing the cells where Wolfy and Ash were once held. I spied Arabella’s cell at the end of the corridor, tensing when she peered at us through the bars, her eyes widening. Our parents were in a more spacious cell farther down, with Drae’s cell just beyond that, separated from them by a thick wall. I dared not go near his cell, for I sensed his dark presence, like a heavy fog of depression.

I tensed when we reached my parents’ cell. I wasn’t looking forward to this encounter, though Father Derrick was depending on me. What if his soul was lost, and I couldn’t heal him?

When the guards unlocked the cell, my mother rushed from the bed, throwing her arms around me. “My darling girl.” She pulled back, examining me from head to toe. “Are you and your mates well?”

“We are.” I shared a look with Ash and Finn while wondering if Shiri had received a similar greeting. “Thank you.” I glanced around the room, which had more furnishings than before, including soft rugs, a buffet of food, and a warm hearth. “Shiri told me he doesn’t wake.”

“He doesn’t.” Mother’s depression radiated outward like a pulsing aura as she watched Derrick with longing. “Do you...do you think his spirit is gone?”

I refused to lie. “I’m not sure.”

I quickly crossed over to Wolfy, whose tail slapped the rug as he curled up beside the hearth, a big bone between his paws. Thankfully, he no longer smelled like sunbaked troll dung. I patted him between the ears, telling him what a good boy he was, which earned more tail slaps. Running my hands over his body, I regrew patches of fur and healed cuts and bruises. He thanked me with a big, sloppy kiss before lying back down on the rug and closing his eyes with a contented sigh.

“A servant brought Inretius flowers for you.” Mother motioned to a basket of dried flowers beside the bed. “Can you bring him back?”

I inwardly winced at the desperation in her voice. “I’ll try my hardest, Mother.”

My legs felt like deadweights as I trudged toward the bed. I gave Marius a weak smile before looking at Derrick. My breath caught when I saw he was as still as a corpse. I sat beside him, sensing no gentle rise and fall of his chest. I grasped his wrist, feeling barely a pulse. He was slipping away from us and might have already been lost.

Finn set the basket of flowers on the bed. “What do you want to do with these?”

“Place them on his chest.” I motioned toward my father while trying to remember what I’d done the time Helian had died. Ironic, for Derrick had been with me at the time, trying to convince me that my necromancy wouldn’t work. But it had, and I only prayed I could duplicate the spell.

“What else do you need us to do?” Ash rumbled, his deep voice a gong reverberating my bones.

I smiled up at him, taking his hand. “You’re doing it.”

My heart fluttered and my veins heated when he kissed my hand, love and adoration shining in his eyes.

“I believe in you, Tari,” he whispered.

Finn grabbed my shoulder, kissing the top of my head. “So do I.”

More magic heated my body, and an overwhelming sense of calm washed over me. I was the luckiest witch alive to have such amazing mates. I could do this.

I pressed my hands upon my father’s chest and closed my eyes, remembering the desperation I had felt when I thought Helian’s soul had been lost to me. I’d called him back, demanding he return to his body. Though I didn’t have the siren’s call, Helian had obeyed, waking up, much to my shock and relief.

“Father,” I loudly whispered while magic heated my hands and flowed into his chest. “I command you to come back to us. Return your soul to your body.”

I sat up on my knees and closed my eyes while envisioning my magic flowing from my hands into him. He had to wake. He had to.

In my mind’s eye, my world was cast in shadow, save for one flicker of light far, far away. I reached out to the light, beckoning it toward me. Slowly, the light grew bigger, pulsing as it neared me. Lurching forward, I grasped the throbbing orb in both hands, cradling it as if it were a fragile egg. I knew this was my father’s spirit, and I was the vessel between the living world and the afterlife that could bring him home.

“You’re coming back with me, Father,” I whispered to the orb, pleased when the light pulsed in response.

My eyes flew open, and I sucked in a breath, as if I’d been holding it underwater. I looked down at my father, who already watched me, a tired smile etched into his features.

A sob escaped me when I fell onto his chest, overwhelmed by relief. I’d done it. I’d brought my father’s spirit back.

“Thank you, darling child,” my father whispered while stroking my hair.

My mother cried out, then fell on top of my father, nearly crushing me. I managed to squirm out from beneath her as Ash helped me off the bed.

Father Marius grabbed me in a fierce hug, kissing the side of my face. “You are a wonder, my child.”

I wiped tears from my eyes. “Thanks.”

He handed me to Finn, who held me tight. “I knew you could do it.”

“I didn’t,” I answered honestly, “but I think I’m getting the hang of it.” Obviously, necromancy was one of my magical gifts, or perhaps near-necromancy. He’d had a pulse, and his spirit was nearby. I just had to show him the way home.

“How do you feel?” Finn asked while rubbing warmth into my arms.

I placed a hand on my rumbling stomach. “Famished.” Powerful healing always worked up my appetite.

He squeezed my hand with a smile. “Let’s get you some food.”

“This calls for a celebration,” Marius said while joining Derrick and my mother on the bed. “Tari, will you and your mates stay and celebrate with us?”

I shook my head. “We need to return to Helian.”

“Of course.” Mother swiped tears from her eyes, frowning like a petulant child. “I’d ask Shiri, but she won’t come.”

“We’ve just brought Nikkos back to her.” My chest heated with ire as I felt the need to defend my sister. “I don’t think she’s leaving her bedchamber tonight.”

Marius loudly cleared his throat, side-eyeing my mother. “Yes, she’ll need to stay with him.”

Ash insisted we return to Helian, and I was glad to have the excuse to leave. I hugged my parents one last time and patted Wolfy’s head, then let my mates lead me out of the cell.

We stood at the heavy cell door that would lead us into the drafty stairwell, but I couldn’t stop my gaze from wandering toward Arabella’s cell. I touched Ash’s shoulder. “Wait,” I whispered before turning toward Arabella.

I didn’t know what compelled me to walk up to the rusty bars that housed her.

Her pile of straw had been replaced by a sparse cot. Though it wasn’t nearly as grand as the bed in my parents’ chamber, it was a big improvement over sleeping on the ground. She still had sausage arms, a sign that she was not the mistress of her own body. I wondered how strange it would feel to be taken over by a terrifying foreign parasite.

Annoyance flashed in her eyes. “What do you want?”

Don’t waste your time on this bitch , Ash grumbled through thought.

Don’t forget she saved our children , I reminded him.

I swallowed, then averted my gaze, angry with myself for letting Arabella intimidate me. “I’ve come to check on you.”

“Where’s Helian?”

Finn’s wolf’s rumble rolled through my mind as he squeezed my hand. She hasn’t changed.

Maybe not , I answered.

I glared at her, curious why she wanted to know. Was she still in love with him, or did she only ask because the question would irritate me? “With the dragon army.”

Her eyes widened. “They’ve accepted him?”

I nodded. “He’s their king now.”

“I knew he’d do it.” Clasping her hands to her heart, she flashed a dazzling smile, one of the last vestiges of her external beauty before the demon had taken over.

At least I had my answer. She was most certainly still in love with my mate. My mate.

She cleared her throat. “How are Ember and Aurora?”

“They are thriving,” I answered, my voice softening. As much as I loathed Arabella, I couldn’t be unkind to the woman who’d saved my children.

Ash’s low growl echoed in my mind. I would’ve ripped the bitch to shreds if she hadn’t saved our children.

Me too , Finn said.

I squeezed my mates’ hands. But she did save them, so we owe her a life debt.

We have spared her life. You and Shiri are healing her , Ash rumbled. She’s been repaid enough.

It will never be enough , I answered, my voice turning shrill while my heart pounded wildly in my ears at the thought of what could’ve happened to our girls.

I forced a smile while catching Arabella staring curiously at me. “I take it you are well?”

“As well as can be.” She frowned down at her hands. “Your sister says she’ll heal me on the morrow.”

I swallowed, realizing she could try to make our lives very uncomfortable. Would Malvolia welcome her to court? We couldn’t exactly ship her back to Windhaven. “And then what will you do?”

She laughed, tossing her long, dark braid over her shoulder. “I won’t try to seduce Helian, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Ash let out a boisterous burst of laughter. “My brother would rather fall on his sword than fuck you.”

Arabella glared at him, her cheeks turning flame red. “I didn’t ask your opinion, mutt,” she answered through clenched teeth.

When Ash let out a shifter’s snarl, I squeezed his hand. Easy.

“I’m not worried.” I rested my hand on my womb, reminding myself I carried Helian’s child, the heir to Caldaria, while holding Arabella’s stare. “Helian’s in love with me.”

Pain flashed in her eyes before she turned her gaze to the hearth. “Once I’m healed, I will help defeat the demons any way I can.” She looked at her sausage hands as if seeing them for the first time. “My uncle said my magic comes from my demon, but I think my demon was holding back my magic. I can feel it now, even when she goes silent.”

“Very well,” I said, hoping she was right. Her ability to manifest wind and storms would come in handy. “I will see you on the morrow.” I flashed Arabella one last smile. “And once you are free, I expect no more trouble from you.”

“Lest you find another Indus head in your bed,” Ash added with a deep chuckle.

Finn laughed aloud.

Arabella gasped, her eyes narrowing.

Ugh. I was trying to smooth things over between us, not start another war with Arabella, but I didn’t want to reprimand my mates, especially not here.

I felt Arabella’s dark gaze boring into us as we left the cell. I wasn’t looking forward to her release. Malvolia’s court was nightmarish enough. Now I’d have to worry about one more bitch driving a blade into my back.

* * *

Tari

A URORA TOOK US BACK to camp after we ate our fill at the castle. Feeling guilty for dining in luxury while the other dragon riders had to ration, Helian brought back several sacks of grains, butter, and eggs for the other riders. I was surprised Malvolia had let us take so many supplies, but nobody tried to stop us.

I gently rubbed my daughter’s backs, singing to them while they slept. They’d finally closed their eyes several minutes ago, but I continued to sing and soothe them while staring at their sweet, cherubic faces. Ember sucked her thumb while curling into Aurora, and Aurora held on to Ember like a protective older sister. I remembered sleeping with Shiri exactly the same way. I would suck my thumb while Shiri let me snuggle her for warmth. Shiri had always been the twin who gave the most love and protection, and she’d always done so without complaint. How could our parents have thought such a selfless, giving child would turn evil?

Finn and Ash were half-asleep on the other side of the children, their tired eyes alternating between opening and closing while they watched shadows dance from flickering candlelight across the canvas ceiling. We’d taken over the main tent, which Helian had said once belonged to him and Ivar had used. Helian had immediately ordered servants to bring in clean linens and air out the tent, clearing away the stale alcohol smell left behind by the previous tenant. The tent was large enough to house a sleeping area and a separate sitting and dining space, providing ample room for our family. I’d had no idea traveling with a dragon army would have such luxuries, but I appreciated Helian quickly taking charge and ensuring the children and I would be comfortable.

Are they asleep? Helian’s deep rumble echoed in my skull.

I peered over my shoulder while he stared at me expectantly, lantern light casting his features in an ethereal glow. I’d sensed a shift in him ever since he’d claimed his throne. He exuded confidence and strength, and he wanted to exert his power over me, causing a delightful shiver to course down my spine.

Yes, finally.

He moved toward me like a wolf stalking his prey. Had he learned that from his brothers? My lips parted as he knelt beside me, his eyes smoldering with desire as he twirled a lock of my hair around his finger. Without waiting for an invitation, he grasped the back of my neck, capturing my lips in a fiery kiss. I thought I heard my other mates stir, but I was too transfixed by Helian as he hovered over me, encompassing me with his large body. When he grasped my thigh, hiking up my night shift, I pulled back with a gasp.

The children , I projected to him. Ash and Finn.

Can wait , he answered.

Goddess, where had this Helian come from? He lifted me into his arms with a snarl and brought me to the sitting area, a section of the tent marked by low sofas piled with pillows the servants had covered with more linens.

He set me down and began stripping off his clothes, his heated gaze never leaving my body.

I regained enough sense to put up a privacy bubble moments before he lifted my shift over my head. Then he was between my legs, his hands and mouth everywhere, branding every inch of my skin with his fiery touch.

I dropped back my head with a groan as he feasted on my neck, his hand cupping my mound while he slipped a finger inside me. Oh, Goddess. The feeling was exquisite. Spreading my legs, I welcomed his probing fingers as his mouth captured one pebbled nipple and then the other. My climax punched through me without warning. Sucking in a groan, I pulsed around his finger, gushing into his hand.

He climbed between my legs with a growl, slamming deep into me. I clung to him, digging my fingers into the globes of his tight, round behind while he rode me hard. Our bodies slapped together, the sounds of our heavy breathing echoing through our small chamber. I had no idea where this animalistic side of Helian had come from, but the rougher his thrusts, the more I gushed.

I am your king. His thought projected into my mind while his hips rolled into me. And you will be my queen.

Oh, Goddess. I clung to him, riding through each thrust, the head of his thick cock making me swell and clench while banging me like a drum. Who was this Fae?

Say it , he commanded while roughly claiming me with a bruising kiss. Say I am your king.

You are my king! I cried.

Say you will be my queen.

Helian—

Say it! He rode me harder, faster.

I gushed and gushed, the threat of another climax robbing my mind of all reason. I would say anything, so long as he didn’t stop. I will be your queen , I cried. I will be your queen!

He fucked me so hard, I swear my soul left my body as another powerful climax rolled through me. I cried out his name when he stilled with a roar, spilling into me.

I hadn’t yet caught my breath when he was moving inside me again, his bruising fingers digging into my breast. What had happened to my sweet Helian? I felt a shift in our dynamic, and I feared Helian would no longer allow Ash to be alpha, and at the moment, I didn’t care so long as he kept riding me.

Only after he gave me another orgasm and then another did he finally roll off me, taking me with him, his hands and mouth possessively roving over my body. And the magic that hummed through me was unlike anything I’d ever experienced, so powerful, my veins buzzed with an endless well of energy.

Sometime during the night, he finally finished, welcoming Ash and Finn into our bubble. Neither complained that Helian had shut them out. Though Helian and Ash hadn’t spoken, I felt the shift between them, and I realized why I’d always been so tired. My magic relied on love to replenish it, and Helian, my true alpha, had been holding back. But after the way he loved me tonight, I felt like I could soar across the world, turning every last demon to ash.

* * *

Tari

A FTER MY MATES AND I made love for nearly half the night, I would’ve expected to fall fast asleep, sated and exhausted. Instead, I drifted in and out of a fitful slumber, tossing and turning, a dozen different scenarios of the war to come playing through my mind. Finally, I gave up all hope of getting rest and sat up, rubbing sleep from my eyes. Finn and Ash were curled up with the girls beside me, but Helian was gone. I slipped into a pair of thin slippers, summoned a small ball of light, and ducked outside the tent.

Following my instincts, I found Helian sitting with a group of other riders in front of a large fire. The moon was heavy and bright tonight, its reflection off the water providing ample light and making Helian’s silvery hair shine like a polished sword.

“Helian,” I whispered, shivering when a cool ocean wind blew the hair off my neck.

He jumped from his seat, wrapping a blanket around my shoulders, the sweet, caring Fae a sharp contrast to the animalistic mate who’d dominated me in bed most of the night. “What are you doing up?”

I shrugged. “I can’t sleep. What about you?”

He cast his gaze to the fire and sighed. “Same.” He snatched another blanket from beside the fire and motioned toward the jagged crimson scales jutting from behind a large dune. “Want to visit the dragons?”

“Sure,” I answered, “as long as they don’t mind.” I wanted to be alone with Helian, mostly so we could explore this change in him. In us. He’d told me I would be his queen. Goddess. I could tell by the force of his declaration that he’d meant every word.

“Radnor’s awake,” he said. “He sleeps like me, one eye open while watching for threats.”

That is hardly a way to live , I thought to myself while hoping things would change if we survived this war.

Helian wrapped an arm around me while leading me up the sandy hill. “What are you thinking?”

I heaved a weary breath. “Everything.”

“Me too,” he said when we reached the top of the dune.

From here, I could see Radnor and Isa curled up with Triss nestled between them. I didn’t have the heart to disturb the happy family and was grateful when Helian laid the blanket on the ground, motioning for me to sit. We sat with our backs to the dragons, facing the sprawling camp made up of our large tent and several smaller ones, along with bonfires interspersed throughout the camp.

I peeled off my slippers, dumping the sand that had found its way inside, its sole purpose to rub my feet raw. Leaning against Helian for warmth, I hugged my knees to my chest, the ocean breeze tickling my nape while I watched the foamy surf roll toward our camp before making a hasty retreat.

Helian loosed a long breath. “They’ll question the legitimacy of our son if we’re not married.”

My breath caught. Was that why he wanted to make me his queen? “Do you want to marry me?”

He turned into me, wrapping a strand of my chestnut hair around his finger. When he looked at me with those luminous eyes, my heart felt like it would beat right out of my chest. “You know I do.”

I swallowed at that. It hadn’t even been a few weeks since Helian was prepared to wed another. I reminded myself he’d been coerced to agree to the marriage because he thought he was keeping me safe. Though I was over it now, did that mean I was ready to marry him? But what if I didn’t marry Helian, and Goddess forbid, he was killed in this war? Would our son have no claim to the throne?

Anger heated my veins when I recalled all the times Finn and Ash had been called bastards by King Fachnan and his cronies. I didn’t want that for my son. But how would Ash and Finn react to me marrying Helian? Would they feel left out? Would they think I loved Helian more than them? After the way I had let Helian dominate me most of the night, maybe they already thought that. I remembered them telling me shifters didn’t have marriage ceremonies. They had private mating ceremonies like the one we had on the night we’d first made love. Would that be enough for them?

I worried my bottom lip before asking, “How will Ash and Finn feel about it?”

Helian shook his head, grimacing. “They’ll have to understand.”

Understand what? Ash’s voice projected into my head.

I gave a start when Ash exited our tent and walked up the dune toward us. I’d forgotten about his keen sense of hearing.

Helian threaded his fingers through mine. “You’ll understand if Tari and I get married.”

Ash knelt on the sand in front of us, his brow furrowed as he peered at me with those penetrating, wolfish eyes. “Do you want to marry him?”

“I don’t want anyone to question the legitimacy of our child’s right to the throne.” I winced when the words sounded flat, like I was trying to justify wanting to marry my mate. When Helian squeezed my hand, I felt even guiltier, as if I didn’t deserve his comfort while I was trying to deny my love for him. Why should I have to justify wanting to marry Helian? If I could marry all three of my mates, I would, but I’d already had a mating ceremony with Ash and Finn. I wanted something special with Helian too.

“You didn’t answer my question,” Ash rumbled, his features eclipsed in shadow. “What if legitimacy wasn’t an issue? Would you want to marry him?”

“Yes.” I desperately searched his eyes, worrying Ash would be upset. “I’m sorry.” I looked at Helian when he pressed against me, and it occurred to me that I was apologizing to both of them. Ugh. I loved my mates, but trying to appease two huge male egos was no fun.

Ash scooted closer, holding my other hand. “Why are you sorry?”

Emotion welled up in my throat. “I don’t want you to think I love you less.”

He arched a brow. “Do you?”

“No!” I blurted, startling even myself at the force of my denial.

Ash shrugged. “Then, it’s not an issue.”

I couldn’t believe how well Ash was taking this. “People will think of Helian as my alpha if he is my husband.”

“He protected you from demons when I couldn’t.” Ash released my hand, threading his fingers through his hair with a sigh. “He deserves to be alpha.”

My heart came to a slow, painful stop. I released Helian’s hand, reaching for Ash while not knowing what to say. “Ash.”

“I’m okay with it,” he said, surrender etched into the turn of his mouth and the slope in his shoulders.

I felt like I was staring at a broken Fae. I turned my gaze to Helian, who offered no reassurance, his expression unnaturally stoic. What was happening?

Twisting my fingers in my lap, I asked, “What if you were both alphas?”

Ash shook his head. “There can only be one alpha, Tari.”

“Who says?”

He shrugged, reminding me of a sad hound. Why was he giving up so easily? “It’s how things have always been with shifters.”

“Helian isn’t a shifter.” I motioned toward Helian, distraught when he didn’t say anything to support my claim. “We can make our own rules.” My voice faltered, and I knew I was fighting a battle I couldn’t win.

“Tari, Helian should be alpha.” Ash took both my hands in his, stroking my fingers while hanging his head. “He’s my older brother, the king of Caldaria.” His features hardened as he looked back up at me. “The Lupine shifters won’t obey and respect him if he’s not alpha.”

They wouldn’t? I was keenly aware of the loudness of Helian’s silence. By refusing to refute his brother, he was saying that he was ready to take over as alpha. There was just one problem—would Ash be able to handle taking orders from Helian?

I ran my tongue over the roof of my mouth, feeling like I’d swallowed a mouthful of grit. “But I hate the idea of stripping the title from you.”

“Tari, I had a lot of time to think while I’d been demon-possessed.” His eyes softened, saddened, the shame reflecting in them making my heart wither and die many deaths. “Helian deserted his army and risked banishment and his own life to save mine and Finn’s lives. He’s saved you many times. He killed the leader of the army that attacked Lupine. I’m okay with it.”

I couldn’t comprehend this paradox, my heart breaking and soaring at once. I crawled into Ash’s lap, clinging to his shoulders. “I love you.”

“And I love you.”

A tiny voice inside me whispered that it was Helian’s birthright to be alpha, that my brave king had already sacrificed so much by being willing to share me. So why was I mad he didn’t fight for Ash?

Helian stood, dusting sand from his trousers. He held a hand down to me. “Tari, you need your sleep.”

He was acting the alpha already. Well, maybe he thought he was alpha of our pack, but I was still a goddess capable of making my own decisions. I stifled a yawn as he gave me an expectant look.

“Fine.” I took his hand, then pushed him off, flouncing down the hill while my mates dodged my heels. “I’m not marrying you without a proper proposal,” I called over my shoulder.

Helian pushed in front of me, stopping me with his hands on my shoulders. He slanted a smile. “You want me to bend the knee?”

I turned up my chin, holding back a smile when I saw the adoration reflecting in his eyes. “I want more than you telling me that I will be your queen or that we have to marry to prevent our son from becoming a bastard.”

He looked at me as if I’d sprouted wings. “Well, what do you want?”

I pushed past him with a huff. “I want you to figure it out.”

Ash’s deep chuckle resonated behind us. “Don’t ask me. You’re the alpha now.”