Page 38 of Something Like Forever

“Would it make you feelbetter if I did mess up again?”

“Yes! Couldyou?”

Tim exhaled. “Let’s see. There’s this cuteguy who keeps coming into the gallery. Never buys anything, but healways finds an excuse to talk to me. I could have an affair.”

“No! Definitely not.” Heshifted uncomfortably. Stress sure took a toll on the body. Benliterally felt sick to his stomach. “Maybe you should call Jason,just to check on him.”

“You said he had to work,right?”

“When he gets homethen?”

Tim nodded. “Okay. Maybe you should take anap. You don’t look so good. I can grab something for dinner orheat up the grill.”

“Yuck,” Ben said. “I ateway too much already.”

“What did youhave?”

Mongolian barbeque. Thekind with an entire buffet of raw ingredients that could beassembled in any combination and given to a chef to stir-fry. Heloved it, but kept thinking of the trays full of raw meat, sittingthere for hours after the lunch rush was over, pink and warm andexposed to open air…

“Sorry,” Ben said, shovingTim away. He started heading for the stairs, wanting privacy, butdidn’t have time. He barely made it to the bathroom by theentryway, already puking as he threw open the toilet lid and fellto his knees. Tim showed up soon after, placing a damp washclothover the back of his neck as the retching continued. “Foodpoisoning,” was all Ben managed to say.

A suitable finale to amessed-up day. How did the old poem go?This is the way the world ends, not with a whimper—Ben reached up, grabbed the handle, andpulled.–but with a flush.

* * * * *

Ben awoke in the middle ofthe night, disoriented. He was in his bed, but on the wrong side.Normally he slept closest to the wall where he felt the mostsecure. Tim was on that side now. Ben felt his stomach flip andremembered why he was nearest to the bathroom, and why the plasticbucket was next to the bed. He wasn’t looking forward to using thatagain, so he forced himself to rise. That’s when his phone rumbled,possibly for the second time, if that’s what woke him up initially.He saw a text from Jason but wasn’t able to read it. Instead he ranwith his phone to the bathroom, the meager contents of his stomachcoming up again before he dry-heaved. Once this passed, he forcedhimself to read the text through the tears in his eyes.

I booked my flight. I’m leavingtomorrow.

That was all. Benstretched out on the bathroom floor, unsure if he felt relieved orupset. Jason was leaving them. This is what he wanted. Just nothow.

“Babe?” Tim padded intothe bathroom, hair sticking up on one side. He bent down next toBen and placed a palm over his forehead. “You’re burning up! Areyou sure this is food poisoning?”

“I don’t know,” Benadmitted. His thoughts were equally feverish. He struggled tofocus, which was upsetting because now more than ever he wanted tothink clearly. His son needed him! Then again, Jason had more thanone dad. “Can you call him?”

“Only if you promise toget back into bed.”

Ben nodded, but didn’t have the strength tomove.

“Okay, tiger…” Tim slippedhis arms beneath him. “Let’s do this.”

“I’m fine,” Ben protestedas he was picked up.

“I can seethat.”

Ben gave in, resting hishead against Tim’s bare chest and wishing he could stay there, eventhough his skin felt too hot. The sheets were damp with sweat whenhe was set down. Tim noticed this too, pushing away the comforteron the other side of the bed, and then heaving Ben over to it. “Inyou go,” he said, pulling the sheet over Ben. Then he set thebucket on the mattress next him. “I washed it, don’t worry. Use itif you need to.”

“Where are you going?” Benasked, fighting to stay awake.

“To call Jason. Then I’llbe back. I promise.”

Ben wanted to reply. Hewanted to get up and call Jason himself! But his stomach wasalready suggesting that they head back to the toilet instead, andrather than face that prospect, he decided to give in tosleep.

* * * * *

When Ben awoke next, itwas morning and he was racing for the bathroom again, unsure if heshould sit or kneel. As it turned out, he did a little of both,swearing to himself to never eat again. Then he crawled back inbed, body exhausted, throat aching, and head burning. The next timehe stirred, a doctor was standing over him. Tim wasn’t far behind,anxious as Ben took a sip of water and answered questions as besthe could. He had one of his own that he asked as soon as they werealone.

“Jason?”