Page 30 of Someone Like You

Giselle

“ H onestly, honey, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this,” Eriss declared.

“I’m fine. Truly, I am,” I replied as I dabbed my eyes with the tissue.

“Mm-hmm. That’s why I’m opening a second box of tissues for your ass,” Raegan stated dryly as she peeled the tab off the box and handed me another tissue.

“It’s better for her to get it out than hold it in,” Eriss chided Raegan.

“You mean like she did with Eli’s ass?” Raegan asked.

“Shh . . . You know we don’t—”

“It’s okay, Riss. Rae, say what needs to be said because God knows that I don’t want to spend another few years miserable while you heffas walk on eggshells around me because you’re afraid you’ll hurt my feelings,” I declared and balled another handful of tissues up and tossed them in the overflowing trash can Eriss had pulled up beside my lounge chair.

We were out by the pool to have some privacy. I had come to stay with Eriss and Aydan since leaving Casimir three weeks ago.

I hadn’t contacted Jude and asked him to help me find a new place.

I had found another realtor altogether with my sister’s help, and I would be making an offer on a house tomorrow.

My realtor told me to sleep on it because she didn’t believe that I was completely sold on that one.

She thought I was settling on something out of desperation because I had yet to find something that I loved.

Eriss had called Raegan over tonight when I had fallen into a crying session that I couldn’t seem to stop. It was the simple things that triggered me these days, and I didn’t know how to stop the tears.

Tonight, it had been Aydan’s mentioning that he was going to watch a basketball game after dinner.

It reminded me of the nights when Casimir had done the same thing.

I slipped out of the kitchen and came outside, where Eriss had found me five minutes later.

She had tried everything in her power to comfort me, but when nothing worked, she called Raegan’s goofy self over to help calm me down.

It was almost impossible to be sad in Raegan’s presence because she always had something crazy to say that would either make you laugh, blush, or want to curse her out.

“You really like this dude, don’t you?” Raegan asked.

“Of course, she does. Otherwise, she wouldn’t be crying, Rae,” Eriss answered for me, like “duh.”

“I’m just saying because she’s not just in her feelings. She’s hurting bad, kind of like she had been when she lost Eli,” Raegan stated compassionately.

“I love Cas, Rae,” I whimpered.

“Damn. That was fast.”

“I know. That’s part of the problem. I feel like we moved too fast. Casimir was my client, and he’d just gotten out of a marriage himself. He hadn’t had time to heal. What if I turned out to be nothing more than a rebound?”

“Or what if he didn’t treat you as a rebound, sis?

What if you were the one to hurt him?” Raegan asked.

“We’re always trying to protect our hearts, but brothas out in these streets risking life and limb to be that nigga, and sometimes we get in the way and won’t let them be that one we claim we want,” Raegan explained.

I looked at Eriss, who turned her lips down and shrugged.

“All I’m saying is that this guy was a good guy to you. He gave you a beautiful home, fully furnished and stocked. You didn’t have to worry about bills, groceries, or anything. He took care of your heart, your home, and your body. All you had to do was let him love you.”

“But my license, Rae? It was in jeopardy.”

“And from what you’ve told us, he was going to take care of that too. You should’ve let his ass pull through and be who he said he was gonna be.”

“Rae, she can’t be risking her license over a Cap ‘N’ Save-A-Ho who may or may not come through.”

“Hey,” I called out and whipped my head in Eriss’s direction.

“Sorry. Not calling you a ho.”

I turned my attention back to Raegan, who, for once, was making sense.

“I’m just saying that you ran too easily.

You gave up too easily. Love is worth fighting for, honey, and it won’t always come easily.

If that man promised that he was going to take care of that ho you should’ve let him do that.

Hell, if you hadn’t, then we could’ve come in and handled that trick ourselves,” Raegan stated.

Eriss raised her hand, and we turned our gaze on her. “Uhm, I don’t know about you, but I can’t fight,” Eriss stated in a tiny voice as she twisted the short hairs in her kitchen at the nape of her neck.

Raegan and I burst out laughing.

“Heffa, we know your ass can’t fight. I wasn’t talking about you, boo. I was talking about bringing my cousins, Daishelle, Trixie, and Junesha.”

“Oh, Lord,” Eriss whispered and lifted her glass to her lips again.

“Maybe I did overreact in the moment. I just felt like I’d gone so far into this thing, and I couldn’t see up from down. When I’m with Casimir, I can’t see anything else. I can’t figure out what’s right or wrong. All I see and want is him,” I explained.

“Yeah, we know.”

“What’s that mean, Riss?”

“You kinda dissed your girls while you were staying with him.”

“I’m sorry.” I apologized, leaned sideways, and wrapped my arms around her.

“Hey, I was all for it. Anytime one of my sisters is getting their back blown out, I promise you that I’m not gonna hate. I was glad that you weren’t moping around anymore,” Raegan noted.

“Me, too, but we did miss you,” Eriss confirmed.

“I missed you ladies too.”

“Then the next time, make sure that you don’t kick us out completely. Maybe let him roll through on a date night so that we can check him out, and then you can get Aydan and Gavin’s opinions on him later,” Raegan stated.

“Well, that’s all over. He hasn’t called or texted me,” I remarked sadly.

“Well, you did walk out on the man. After all, who wants to keep getting rejected?” Raegan replied.

“She does have a point,” Eriss agreed.

“Thank you, boo,” Raegan stated and blew a kiss at Eriss.

It was seldom my friends agreed on anything.

“Just text him and ask if the two of you can talk,” Eriss suggested.

“What if he doesn’t respond?” I asked.

Shrugging, Raegan stated, “Well, at least you know that you tried. I mean, you’ve already rejected him. Don’t get mad if you get a taste of your own medicine.”

“You’re right.”

We talked some more, drank lots more, and nibbled on the snacks that Eriss had prepared before we decided to call it a night. Gavin had come over with Raegan so that she could drink and didn’t have to worry about driving home. He had gone downstairs to the man cave with Aydan to watch football.

When we finished, Raegan went downstairs to get her husband, and Eriss did the same. I retired upstairs alone with a broken heart.

I lay in the bed for several long minutes and tossed and turned, wondering if I should text Casimir or wait until the morning. He clearly had no plans to reach out to me.

I stared at my phone for the longest time and then sent him a text.

ME: Hey, can we talk?

HIM: Sure. You want me to call you now?

ME: I was thinking that maybe we should have this conversation in person.

HIM: You want me to come and get you? Where are you?

ME: Maybe not now. Besides, it’s late, and I’ve had a couple of drinks.

HIM: Where the hell are you, Elle?

ME: With friends. Safe in the home I’ve been staying in.

HIM: Please. Can I come to you now?

ME: It can wait until tomorrow.

HIM: I can’t.

ME: You’ll have to.

HIM: A’ight. I’ve got a few meetings tomorrow. Meet me in the evening at the Cherokee Springs Botanical Garden at six.

ME: See you there.

I had been surprised that the minute I texted him, he immediately texted back. I thought it might be a minute before he responded, if he responded at all. My heart leaped inside of my chest at the thought that he was missing me as much as I had missed him.

I was startled when, a few moments later, my phone rang. I saw that it was Casimir FaceTiming me.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

“I thought we were waiting until tomorrow,” I stated and bit my bottom lip.

“I told you I couldn’t wait. Even if we don’t have the conversation tonight, I wanted to see you.”

“Okay.”

“I miss you, Elle.”

“Really? What do you miss?”

“The way that you feel underneath me, on top of me, in my arms. I miss our conversations, dinner together, your laughter, and your scent. I miss all that. I miss the way you taste, Elle.”

“You act like we’ve been together forever.”

“The first sample of you is enough to get a man addicted. And that’s not even talking about how sweet you taste, those pouty lips, or your southern lips.”

I giggled.

“Why do you look so sad, Elle?”

“I told you. I’ve missed you. I know that you think it was easy for me to just walk out the way that I did, but it wasn’t. It was a hard decision that I felt the need to make.”

“And now?”

“Now, I’ve come to realize that I made a hasty decision without thinking things through. I panicked, and I, of all people, know that it’s never a good thing to respond in a panic.”

“Mmm.”

“What does that mean?”

“Just that we all do things we regret.”

“Have you? Recently, I mean.”

“Yeah. I’ve had a lot of regrets, starting with you walking out that door. But I also regret that I didn’t send a definitive message that you weren’t to be fucked with.”

“And have you sent a message?”

The devious look in his eyes, the chuckle he released, and the way he winked hit me deep down below.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, beautiful.”

We ended the call, and finally, I could sleep.