Page 14

Titan stood with his back to me, looking out the windows to the beach beyond the hotel. At the bar, I fixed him a glass of Cognac on the rocks, then strolled to him and lifted it as an offering.

Glancing at me, then at the glass, Titan sighed, took the liquor, and pulled me into an embrace.

“Are you okay?”

I slipped my hands under his shirt, caressing his back and muscular torso.

“I’m… aggravated.”

I nodded. “I’m sorry.”

Our eyes met. “Why are you sorry?”

“You were pained by that interaction. I hate to see you in pain.”

He stared at me, and something ran through his thoughts before he dropped a kiss on my forehead and looked back out the window.

“I’ve experienced pain that goes beyond that interaction, trust me.”

Sorrow knotted in my belly. “I’m sorry about that, too.”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine.”

He looked down at me again. “Okay. It’s not fine. But, I’m here in the present with you. So, technically, it’s fine. I don’t have to live in the past.”

“While you’re not physically living in the past it is something that haunts you, isn’t it?”

“I do the haunting. Nothing haunts me.”

“Do you think your past has anything to do with how you rule your present?”

He peered at me. “Are you asking if being abandoned is the reason I rain hell on Earth?”

I ran my tongue across my teeth. “Sure.”

He chuckled. “Maybe. Not entirely, but somewhat. I had to build a fortress around myself as a kid because people take advantage of kids, they abuse them in a lot of ways, and someone has to teach these types of people a lesson.”

“That someone is you, I guess.”

His gaze went back to the beach, and I took his silence as his answer.

“Was it your foster parents?”

“It was everyone I came in contact with until Cruz, Storm, Rev, and you.”

My hands stilled, then I hugged him tighter. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.”

“But I am.”

“There’s nothing for you to be sorry about.”

“You didn’t deserve what happened to you.”

“You don’t know what happened to me.”

“From what you said I can read between the lines.”

He glanced at me, his jaw locked, and his thoughts shuffled again.

“What happened to your mother?”

His nostrils flared at the same time sorrow moved through his faraway gaze.

“I don’t know.”

“You never met her?”

“Not in a way you would meet your mother.”

I remained quiet and let him consider what to share.

“When I was younger, I sought her out. When I found her, she was in a drug house in Nigeria. To answer your question, she saw me, but she didn’t. She thought I was there to serve her. She….”

A knot formed in my throat. “I’m sorry I asked.”

“It pains me that you’re sorry for things outside your control.

I’ll tell you this. I left the country when I was a young teenager.

By then, I’d learned some of the worst horrors of mankind.

I never looked for Jidenna again. I don’t know her status.

I don’t care to know. But you’ll be the first to know if I ever change my mind. Okay?”

“Okay.”

Silence filled our space, and I wished I could take his pain away.

“How did you meet my brother?”

That brought a tiny smile to his lips.

“Rev knew I was a loner. He watched me as much as I watched everyone around me, including him. At school, he would try to get to know me in class, but I didn’t speak unless it was a part of the lesson being taught.

” He chuckled. “That motherfucker wouldn’t let me be.

One day, a classmate decided to test me and see if I was pussy or not.

He and his “bad boys” group took my silence as a weakness.

I was outside leaning against a tree, watching the street, and lost in my thoughts when a small can of pork beans flew at my head.

I caught it before it hit me, turned, and slung it back.

It knocked the little nigga on his forehead, and he started screaming like a bitch. ”

I smirked as pride rose in my chest. “Why am I not surprised?”

His brow arched as he looked down at me. “What? I wasn’t always a force to be reckoned with.”

“Yes, you were.”

“Okay, you got me.”

We chuckled, and he continued.

“You can say my circumstances created a monster, but I can’t deny there was always one developing inside me. A part of my circumstances is why I don’t take hits that involve kids – and I don’t trust anyone.” He pinched my chin. “Except you… and The Paradox.”

“Now.”

“Yes, now.” His gaze went back to the beach. “Rev caught the entire interaction, and when the little nigga’s friends circled me, here he comes… you fuck boys don’t want smoke, do you?”

“They turned to see him approaching with Cruz and Storm by his side. They must’ve been hell at the school because them little niggas dispersed so quick, it was like they flew out of there.”

I nodded. “That sounds like my brother, Cruz, and Storm.” I watched him close. “Sounds like you, too.”

He looked down at me, seeing my eyes fall. “Hey.” He lifted my chin, and we locked eyes. “Rev would be proud of you.”

“For killing someone? Maybe not.”

“For defending yourself.” He sucked his teeth. “I understand you’re embracing the violence. But don’t get it twisted – you’re not violent for the sake of being a menace. You shot someone?—”

“Killed… someone.”

He stared at me, and I held his gaze.

“Okay. You killed someone because that person was a threat to you. To us, not because you’re evil.

So yes, he would be proud that you stood up for yourself.

And he’d love it that you’re embracing the violent nature that will keep your guards high.

One of the things he worried about most was you getting caught in the crossfire because of his actions.

” Titan gritted his teeth then released a deep breath.

“He would’ve burned the city down to find you if he was here. ”

I smiled. “Like you?”

He smirked. “Worse.”

“I don’t think it can get any worse than that.”

“You really enjoyed watching me in action, didn’t you?”

“Yes. My pussy has never been wetter.”

Titan drove his tongue across his teeth then bit his bottom lip. “Don’t talk like that, or I’ll take you down, and I need to handle some business.” He faced me and grabbed my throat, dropped his mouth onto mine, spread my lips with his tongue, and inhaled me in hot suckles that melted my bones.

My body ignited, and our tongues flicked and sucked.

“Mmmmm. Don’t go,” I murmured. I burned under his heavily lidded gaze. He kissed me deep, and I slipped my arms around his neck.

“I’ll return shortly, lover.”

He released me and left me teetering on the edge of desire. I turned and watched him go while my hormones raged for his strokes.

“I’ll return shortly, lover.”

But that wasn’t the case. Whatever business Titan was handling must’ve been important because I spent the day watching Netflix, meditating, working out on his elliptical machine, and scrolling social media waiting for his return.

It didn’t feel crazy that I missed him in such a short time.

I had it bad for him, and I was okay with that. I just hoped he was, too.

Titan’s mysteriousness had always sparked my curiosity.

I hoped he would let me in more than he did in the past. And while he revealed enough that I knew his parents abandoned him when he was young, that he spoke the native language of his Nigerian mother – Yoruba from time to time, and that his tattoo sleeves were mental depictions of his rise into the man he was today, I still wanted to know where he went when he disappeared into the night and when he stared into the flame of fire.

Maybe I was greedy, but I wanted all of him in every way imaginable. I had told him this, but I don’t think he understood, and I planned to make it known again.

4:36 A.M.

I rose from the sheets and took note of the empty bed.

Frowning, I took my eyes around the room to find Titan’s silhouette standing before the floor-to-ceiling windows, hands behind his back, his strong physique outlined by the moon’s glow.

I could feel his energy throbbing like a big dick, and it powered me, sending tingles to my nipples and clit.

Easing out the bed, I went to him, sliding my hand up his bare back while the other slipped into his boxer briefs and removed his dick.

“Whatever is troubling you, let me help.”

I stroked his erection as it stiffened in my grip. Titan’s gaze dropped to mine, and his brown eyes appeared to transform in the moonlight. Seeing the shift in him made my heart rate increase. From dark brown orbs to deep black irises so obscure I couldn’t connect with his soul.

“Show me the way to your heart,” I said, stroking his dick.

A deep vibrating hum trekked from him before he spoke.

“The way to my heart goes beyond the parallel of the contract we agreed on. Are you sure that’s what you want, Santari?”

His voice was the deepest I’d ever heard it before. I stared into his gaze, looking to connect with the man I’d grown to want in ways that went past sexual desire, but he was hiding from me.

“Titan?”

When his lips curled, it was otherworldly, and the dimples that were otherwise hidden because of his rare smiles made an appearance.

“You ask for Titan as if I am someone else,” he said. His smile dropped and he became expressionless. “Who do you see?”

“I’m not saying that you’re not Titan. Clearly, you are, you just seem…” I squinted.

“What?”

We gazed at each other and a shiver slipped down my spine. “To answer your question, yes, I do want more. I think you know this even if I haven’t verbally said it before.”

“Why do you feel like you have to ask me for more? You don’t feel us growing closer by the day?”

I hesitated. “Yeah, but… you disappear sometimes. You hold back. I thought… that you would give me all of you.”

“And yet when I show you me in my entirety, you don’t seem to recognize me.”

I inhaled a deep breath. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. Be open – be willing… I’m not sure if you really want me, Santari.”

My heart squeezed. “Don’t say that again.”

“I’m. Not. Sure. If…”