Page 74 of Shadow Throne King

Seventeen

“No,” I said, so fiercely that it startled me, even though it made too many things slide into place. “That’s why you had accepted your death at my hand. That’s why you wanted to marry me, an assassin sent to your court by the Northern Kingdom. Because if you died from a long, lingering illness, it wouldn’t be sudden enough. Your enemies would have time to prepare, to ready themselves for your absence. They would not fall to chaos.”

“Yes.” Tallu closed his eyes, then opened them, and I was struck at how honest his russet gaze seemed, as though I was seeing into a lit window at night. “It was not only that. I was notusingyou. Or, at least, no more than you already knew me to be. But you solved a problem that I had been struggling with since I first realized the outcome of the blood mages’ curse.”

“Why not take your own life? Why not throw yourself off a building or feed yourself to the sea serpents you starve?” I demanded. “Why bringmeinto it?”

“Should I have let your sister stay, then? You had come to kill me. Perhaps I could have managed to end my own life. Perhaps I could have found that strength, but could I be certain of finding the flying machine on my own? Could I make sure the generalshad scattered like rats?” Tallu frowned and raised a hand to wipe at a droplet of sweat at his brow. “And how could I be sure to time my own death correctly when I could already feel the curse inside me?”

“You said your illness was just because we were higher in elevation. That the journey itself was hard on you.” The betrayal felt like a knife to the gut, and I desperately wished I could go back to a few minutes earlier when I didn’t know how much of his love for me was because I promised him death.

“It was a partial truth. The journey has been a strain, more than I expected it to be,” Tallu said.

“So you and Lerolian just lied to me this entire time.” Frustrated, I sat up, staring at him until I had to look away. He looked so hopeless, and it made me want to scream.

“No. I think Lerolian has convinced himself that the curse didn’t take. That instead of its true outcome, it simply resulted in me being haunted. But he does not live in my skin, and he does not know the pain I feel.” Tallu pushed up on his elbows, then sat all the way up. He reached for me, and I let him draw his fingers across my cheek and down my chin. “I did not want to lie to you, but once I began to love you, it felt impossibly selfish to weigh you down with this knowledge. I love you, and like Lerolian, I began to believe that maybe that was enough to save me. Maybe the curse wouldn’t have the intended outcome. This journey has proved me wrong.”

“But you lied to me before we ever set out for the Lakeshore Palace,” I pointed out, my voice feeling as hard as stone in my throat. “When you were visiting with Dr. Jafopo at the capital. You told me it was about Asahi.”

I blinked, realizing it was even worse than that. Weeks ago, before our one-month celebration, the ravens had told me that the doctor was visiting him. They hadtoldme. And I had beenfool enough to think that if something was truly wrong, Tallu would surely inform me.

“Why did you lie to me?” I wasn’t sure what else to ask. Nothing I said would change his fate.

“Because I didn’t want it to be true!” Tallu dropped his hand from my face, fisting it on his lap. “Because I didn’t want it to be true anymore. I had lived with my own death and the fate I decided to build from it for so long, and then I found you, and you shared the burden with me. You helped me carry it. And I thought—” He broke off and opened his fingers wide before looking back at me with a helpless expression. “And I thought,I do not want it anymore. I willnotlie down and accept that I am dying because of something my father did to a people who did not deserve it.”

“We should ask Miksha. She’s a blood mage—” But the words died on my tongue when I remembered one of the first things she had told me.I cannot save him from his fate.

“I refuse to let it be true,” I said. “We found each other, despite all of it. We have dismantled the military system that makes up the Imperium’s might. I will not let you die.”

Tallu’s expression was stunned, and the smile on his face was so small, so genuine, that I had to look away.

“You know, I believe you,” he said. “For the first time since I realized what Lerolian wasn’t telling me, what the curse was actually supposed to do, I feel as though I can survive this.”

The magic around us grew fragile, like ice thinning on a frozen lake. All at once, I heard cracking, and I raised my hand, pressing my fingertips to Tallu’s lips, quieting him.

Then, we were dropped back into reality, time resuming its flow around us. I pulled him down with me, wrapping my arm around his waist and letting him hold me close. He pressed a kiss to my hair, and I wasn’t sure why that reassured me, but I knew one thing for certain: I would not let him succumb to his fate.

I wasn’tsure when or how we even fell asleep, I just knew that before I was even awake, I was out of bed, my blade up pressing on the Kennelmaster’s throat, my other hand splayed backward, guarding Tallu. Weak daylight slanted into the room, staining everything a gray color.

He smirked at me, his eyes crinkling behind his mask. “Prince Airón?”

I shook my head, blade dropping to my side. “Where are the Dogs?”

“I sent them out.” The Kennelmaster stepped back, turning to the door as Tallu sat up in bed, silent as he pulled on his robe, his naked flesh disappearing under it. When Tallu cinched the silk tight around him, the Kennelmaster turned back. “I wanted to speak to your ears alone.”

“Soyouget privacy, but His Imperial Majesty doesn’t?” I challenged. Annoyed, I grabbed my sleep pants and pulled them on. The pain from the long ride was showing itself in full now, and I flexed my foot, trying to work out some of the tightness in my muscles.

“I am the Kennelmaster, and guarding you while you sleep is the least my Dogs can do.” The Kennelmaster looked at me pointedly. “And I didn’t want them to hear what I had to say. Not yet.”

“What happened?” Tallu’s voice was rough. Even though I knew now the curse that ate at him, in the dawn light, I could not tell he was ill. I could not see he was suffering; he wore the mask that well.

Anxiety closed my throat, panic making my breath come short.

“The Dogs I assigned to guard Maki’s workshop are missing.” The Kennelmaster reached up, removing his mask. His face was drawn, and he moved his jaw back and forth before shaking his head. “There is no sign of them, but they would not leave their post.”

“None of your Dogs would take this as an opportunity to go elsewhere?” I pressed. “We are far from the capital, and this might be their best chance at freedom.”

“The drawbridge wasn’t lowered, and even a Dog would not be able to survive the serpents that live in the moat.” The Kennelmaster frowned. For all of his gruffness and practicality, he cared for his men. That had been his one request when we stood over Boro’s cooling body: the permission to continue the Dogs. “They are gone.”