Page 95 of Shades of Earth (Across the Universe 3)

I sit on the floor and pull my knees up under my chin. The . 38 digs into the soft skin of my belly, and I pull it out, staring. Inside it are five hollow-point bullets . . . the only bullets I have left.

I set the gun down beside me. I wore it before because it made me feel safe and it appeased my parents’ worry. But now I think about those five bullets and what they can do. It is no longer simply a precaution. I intend to use them, and I will.

I understand the part of my dad that wants to kill the aliens, even at the price of blowing up the whole planet with them.

I hug my knees, burying my face in my arms.

This room feels very large, and I feel very small.

52: ELDER

I know what I have to do.

The question is: can I?

I wait until night falls. The entire colony has spent the day fluctuating between tension and grief, fear and panic. The military is on edge, more people than usual during each shift of patrols.

But I know I have at least one ally.

Chris.

He might not be my favorite person, but he was with me when I argued with Colonel Martin and I know that, like me, he’d do anything in his power to protect Amy.

He waits for me about an hour after the suns set. “What have you got planned?” he asks me softly as we head down the path through the colony.

“Neither of us wants Colonel Martin to play around with whatever bomb the FRX has up at the space station, right?” I ask him.

Chris nods. “I don’t trust the FRX. ”

“Good,” I say. “Neither do I. ”

We sneak through the alleys of the colony, then I duck behind the first row of buildings so I can get to Amy’s window. Chris frowns at me—Amy was too caught up in grief earlier today; how can we expect her to help now? But I can’t imagine doing this without her.

“Amy,” I hiss. I think Colonel Martin is assisting with patrols, but I don’t want to risk it.

Amy sits in the center of her room, her knees drawn up to her chin, her eyes sunken and hollow. But she looks up at me and, after taking a deep, shaky breath, stands and crosses the room to the window.

Her eyes spark with curiosity when she notices Chris standing nervously behind me.

“What’s going on?”

“I have a plan,” I say. “Come with me?” I try to hide the hope and trepidation in my voice. Amy has every reason to say no—her mother just died, and we’re all scared of whatever the aliens are planning for us next.

But a moment later she’s lifting herself up on the windowsill and jumping outside.

“You okay?” I whisper.

“No,” she says simply.

It is the honesty of this statement that makes me know that although all of this has cracked her, she’s not broken.

“But I want to do something,” she says for my ears alone. “I can’t stand the thought of being alone right now. ”

“That something you want to do,” I say. “It’s not the same plan Colonel Martin has, to detonate whatever weapon that is up in the space station, right?”

Amy gives me a look that is wholly her. “Of course not,” she says. “I’m not Dad. ”

“Let’s go,” Chris says, looking around. Helping me now isn’t exactly against Colonel Martin’s orders, but getting caught would lead to questions he probably doesn’t want to have to answer.