Page 43 of Score to Settle (Oakwood Ranch #1)

THIRTY-TWO

HARPER

Notes for feature: I’M THE GIRL.

I’m the girl.

I’m the one Jake looks for in the crowd. The one who makes him smile like that.

Even though I’m freaking out about what this is going to do for my career and what Tim will say, I can’t stop smiling.

My cheeks hurt from it. My lips are sore from all the kissing.

My whole body aches because of this man.

For this man. I’m supposed to be finishing my latest notes and sending them to Tim.

I’m almost done and I’ve opened the latest chapter of my book, pouring my emotions into my characters.

Writing is usually the only thing that makes me happy, but now I’m happy and writing for the joy of it, not to escape.

I save the latest version and open the email to Tim to tell him Jake and I are dating.

To apologize for the unprofessionalism and grovel for my job.

Even if there’s a chance my name won’t get connected to Jake on the gossip sites, I want to come clean to Tim. No more lies.

A few weeks ago this would’ve had me spinning out, but it’s as though one of my own walls has come down in the time I’ve been with Jake.

I can see that while I enjoy my job, while it’s important to me, it’s not everything.

It’s not the center of the universe. I don’t want to be fired, but if it happens, I know I’ll be OK.

I read through my pleading apology for the tenth time then leave the email unsent, deciding to distract myself by calling Mia instead. She answers on the first ring.

“Please tell me you gave Jake the celebration he deserved after his epic win last night.”

I laugh. “Hello to you, too.”

“Harper.”

“Mia,” I reply.

She cackles. “You know what, don’t tell me. It’s fine. I can hear it in your voice.”

“Hear what?” I grin.

“That husky ‘I’ve had all the sex’ voice.”

I laugh. “I don’t sound like that.”

“Yeah, but you’re not denying it either.”

“Fine. We had sex again,” I reply, my grin widening.

The scream in my ear is piercing and injected with the same excitement of the thirteen-year-old version of Mia when we got tickets to the rodeo finals in Las Vegas.

“So what does this mean?” she asks. “I’m guessing you saw that photo of Jake in the news? Are you together together? Is this just sex? Are you riding off into the sunset?” she asks, adding enough innuendo to the word riding so I know she doesn’t mean on a horse.

“I have no idea,” I reply, although I know it’s more than just sex.

The way Jake took my hand on the walk. The way he looks at me like I’m the only one in the world he can see.

It’s a lot more. Just as I know that if I spend any time thinking about this, I’m going to dive into all the questions Mia just asked me.

These feelings could tip in a heartbeat from exciting to scary, and all I want is to exist in this moment and be happy.

The future is coming for us one way or another.

I could be one email away from being fired.

The Stormhawks have two tough games ahead of them to determine if they make the playoffs.

And I have six days left with Jake before the assignment is over. I don’t know what’s going to happen.

“Where is Jake now?” Mia asks.

“We’re at the ranch. Mama and Dylan just got back from LA and Jake’s filling her in on last night?—”

“Wha—”

I huff a laugh. “The game, Mia. He’s telling her about the game.

And I’m hiding in Chase’s room, drafting an email to Tim with my latest notes for the feature, and since that story about Jake hit this morning, I’m also telling him we’re…

” I sigh. “Whatever it is we are, begging for my job and hoping he’s not going to fire me for sleeping with Jake.

” A small part of me is hiding from Mama, too.

Thankfully Jake and I were fully clothed and in the kitchen when Mama and Dylan stepped through the door, but we might as well have been naked for the knowing smile she gave us.

“It’ll be fine, Harper,” Mia says. “I know you care about your reputation, and yeah, Tim might not be too happy, but honestly, this stuff happens all the time.”

“I hope Tim agrees. I’m going to offer to forgo the byline so my name isn’t attached to the feature.”

“Are you sure? Your career?—”

“My career wouldn’t even exist if it wasn’t for Tim giving me a chance. It feels like the right thing.” I sigh before changing the subject, needing a distraction. “How are you, anyway?”

Mia launches into a description of dinner with Edward’s family and the pressure they’re under to announce an engagement.

I can understand the questions. They’ve been dating for three years and they’re good together.

But neither seems to want to take the next step.

I’m listening to Mia as I finish the email to Tim, attach my latest notes, and press send before I can find another reason to delay.

A sharp unease hits my chest as I start to close down the lid of my laptop. I didn’t just… I wouldn’t have…

Fuck!!!

“Mia,” I hiss. “I have to go.”

“Lover boy calling you to his bed?” she asks.

“I think I just sent the wrong file to Tim.”

“What did you send him?” Mia asks.

“I… Can I call you back?”

We say a hurried goodbye and I open the sent folder. I was on autopilot. It will be fine. Of course I sent him the latest notes on the feature and not…

A sick feeling twists in my gut as I stare at the file I attached. Not the notes, but my novel. My entire novel. I was just working on it and I’m so used to emailing the latest version to myself for safekeeping, and I was talking to Mia, my head filled with Jake and… FUCK!

My fingers fly across the keyboard as I furiously type a second email.

Hi Tim,

Please IGNORE and DELETE the file attached to my previous email. Here is the correct one!

Harper

JAKE: I miss you in my bed.

HARPER: No way am I sneaking around when Mama is in the house. Remember how thin the walls are?

JAKE: I’m booking a hotel!

HARPER: It’s late and you’re due at practice first thing.

JAKE: We could go to the barn.

HARPER: Goodnight, Jake.

It’s the middle of the night and I can’t sleep.

I refuse to sneak around the ranch with Mama and Dylan home, but that doesn’t mean I don’t long for Jake’s hands on me.

The knowledge that he’s lying in his bed in the room next to mine—the bed we slept in together last night—is thrumming through my body.

I flop against my pillows, but it’s no use.

I’m too wound up, my mind racing with thoughts of Jake and everything that’s happening between us.

And the email I sent Tim with my novel attached.

As if telling him Jake and I are now seeing each other wasn’t bad enough, I’ve just sent him a very spicy novel about vampires having all the sex.

He won’t read it , I tell myself. And yet, I’m still dying inside.

With a sigh, I throw off the covers. Maybe a glass of water will help settle my nerves.

There’s been no more snow yet, but the cold has permeated the ranch and I throw on a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt.

I pad softly down the stairs, the old wooden floorboards creaking under my feet as I make my way through the house.

Buck is lying by the dying embers of the fire in the living room.

His tail thumps gently on the floor as I pass by, but he doesn’t get up and I don’t blame him.

As I reach the kitchen, I’m surprised to find the light is already on.

I pause in the doorway, finding Dylan sitting at the table, a bowl of cereal in front of him.

He looks up as I enter, his expression unreadable.

He’s seemed more sullen than usual since he returned from LA earlier.

I imagine Jake being injured. Having his career ripped away from him by a split-second tackle. A pang of sympathy hits my chest.

“Just getting a glass of water,” I say.

“Can’t sleep, either?” he asks, shoveling a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

I shake my head, glad for the extra clothes I’ve thrown on.

“How was the treatment center?” I ask, filling a glass and taking a sip.

He grimaces. “Painful.”

“Will it help?”

A spark of hope flashes in his eyes. “They think I might have a shot at getting back to football for next season.”

“That’s amazing.”

“Yeah. But it means another op and another month sitting on my ass.”

“But if it works…”

“Yeah,” he mumbles, turning his attention back to his cereal. “So, you and Jake, huh?” Dylan asks and I don’t miss the not-so-subtle change of subject.

Heat creeps over my face. Is it that obvious? I think of the way Jake and I were over dinner tonight. Unable to stop staring at each other. His foot resting against mine beneath the table. I don’t know what to say, so I shrug and sip my water.

“Just be careful, Harper. Jake has a way of hurting those he loves.”

My head shoots up in surprise. Dylan’s remark is sweeping, just like Coach Allen’s after the game. Trouble always finds that boy. It feels like they’ve both got Jake wrong.

I lean against the counter. “You don’t have to worry.”

Dylan pushes his empty bowl away. “If you say so. As long as you’re not making the mistake of thinking you’re special, you’ll be fine. Jake can turn on the charm when he wants to, but he’s only out for himself.”

A flash of hurt cuts across my chest, but I push it aside and set my glass on the counter with too much force. I trust the man I’ve got to know in the last four weeks. The one I’m falling for. And I’m sick of everyone else thinking shit about Jake without bothering to see the truth.

“Are we talking about me being hurt or you?” I ask, folding my arms across my chest.

He shakes his head. “This isn’t about me.”

“Isn’t it? Because from where I’m standing, you’re the one who’s lashing out and hurting the people that love you.”

“How do you figure that?” He sits back, giving me a look like I’m full of shit. It only makes me more determined to defend Jake.

“You’re so busy being angry with Jake about your knee injury, you can’t see how much you’re pushing him and everyone else away. I think you need to ask yourself if it’s really him you’re mad at or the situation.”

He huffs but it’s not a laugh. “You a psychologist now? For your information, I have every right to be mad at Jake. If he’d been playing that game like he’d been supposed to instead of thinking with his dick, he’d have protected me from the tackle.

I don’t know how the hell he didn’t get dropped, but my whole life is over because of him. ”

Anger flashes through me, making my fists curl, as much for Dylan and his misguided fury as it is for what happened last year to him and Jake. The unfairness of it all. “And you haven’t stopped to ask yourself why Jake didn’t get dropped, even though you’re saying he should’ve been?”

“Jake’s always been good at talking himself out of trouble. You might be blinded by his charm, but I’m not.”

I grit my teeth, forcing my voice to stay low. “You haven’t asked him about it though, have you?”

“No need. Saw it on the news.”

“Yeah, and that’s never wrong.” Sarcasm drips from my voice as I stride across the kitchen. At the doorway I turn back to Dylan. “Maybe it isn’t me who needs to think about how well I really know Jake.”

Dylan opens his mouth like he’s going to fire back another retort, but he doesn’t and I head back to my room and open my laptop, needing the escape of my novel as my heart continues to race.

But instead, all I do is stare at the blinking cursor, unable to concentrate.

I think back to Dylan’s resentment and misplaced blame.

Anyone can see how much Jake is hurting over his brother’s injury.

He blames himself as much as Dylan does. But I overstepped just now.

I close my laptop and flop onto the bed. Maybe I’m losing myself in their problems because it’s easier than thinking of my own. Like Tim’s reply to my email this afternoon.

We’ll talk about this the next time you’re in the office.

It’s obvious he’s not happy, but at least I still have a job.

For now. But it only makes me feel even guiltier for letting Tim think in the interview that my knowledge of sports included football.

Not to mention the small fact I didn’t disclose my previous connection to Jake when he gave me this assignment.

Something that seems a lot worse considering we’re now sleeping together.

Then there’s Jake. We need to talk about what this is between us. All I know for sure is however complicated a future with Jake might be, I’ve never wanted anything more.