Page 11 of Scarlet Sins (Yegorov Bratva #2)

Chapter Nine

ERIN

I’m beyond bored. Sasha is here, so he saves me, as does Alina. But I can’t rely on them to entertain me or keep me occupied. There are books, a computer, but without something to actually do, I think I’m going crazy.

In the past few days, Alina and I went to the shops to get a present for Max’s mom’s birthday.

It wasn’t anything like a spree, more she went to buy the gift Max had picked out.

She wasn’t sure if she should, but I said if it was me, I’d appreciate it.

She’s his mother’s last real link to her son.

The gift? Letting his mom know Max had thought of it would mean everything.

And that when Alina wanted, we’d go around to see her.

I’d bring Sasha. But only when Alina was ready.

Other than that, I managed a checkup with me and with Sasha but that’s it.

Demyan has me under house arrest.

He wouldn’t call it that.

He’s just said he prefers if I stay home where Sasha and I will be safe.

Demyan speaks for house arrest .

On the fifth day, I’m ready to gnaw a leg off, and as I feed Sasha his non cereal breakfast—he’s had more than enough sugar in the past few weeks—I steel myself as Demyan walks in.

I may be furious at the man, but he’s insanely hot in his three-piece suit, dark hair swept back, his handsome face thoughtful as he makes himself a coffee.

He kisses Sasha and hands him a small bowl of berries and yogurt, which Sasha immediately goes to town on.

Then Demyan looks at me. “Maybe you should go out today.”

That gets my attention. Not that he doesn’t already have it. But I go still. Out? “You’re letting me off the leash?”

“It’s not a leash.” He sips his coffee as he leans against the kitchen island as Sasha smashes a blueberry into the table with extreme prejudice. “Just thought you’d like to go out. Maybe catch up with that friend of yours. What’s her name? Katie?”

“Kara.” I blink, take in a breath. “I think that would be—” I stop.

And narrow my eyes.

“You want me to go out?”

“I have people to accompany you.”

“Even with that, you don’t like it. You got mad when I went to the jewelers with your sister. And took Sasha for a checkup and now…”

He hasn’t stopped reminding me I’m still in danger.

His gaze is calm and unreadable.

“Why are you…” I trail off. And it slams into me like a brick. “Stefina.”

Demyan doesn’t deny it.

“I thought you’d like to stretch your wings.” That’s it. That’s all he says.

“Don’t. I’m not an idiot, Demyan. ”

He sighs. “Fine. She’s coming over and I didn’t think you’d want to be here.”

I don’t know why it hurts more but it does.

“Why? She’s been here before and you haven’t kicked me out in the past few days, so there must be something.” I narrow my eyes again. “What else, Demyan?”

“She’s bringing her chosen celebrant. Something about vows and running through it all. I don’t fucking know why she wants me to meet this asshole.”

“That’s just great.”

“I thought you wouldn’t want to be around,” he says. “The wedding isn’t happening, but it stresses you so?—”

“You thought you’d shove me out the door, tell yourself I’m some kind of hysterical woman, and lessen your guilt.

Because I imagine it’s a lot harder to plan your wedding and have the person presiding over said wedding with your son and his mother in the same mansion.

” I press my lips together. “Because what if I wandered by? Or Sasha came in? I’d hate to ruin it. ”

“It’s got nothing to do with you or Sasha ruining anything.”

“You just want to get rid of us,” I spit. “That’s all.”

“No, I’m trying to make this easier on you.” His fingers tighten on the cup.

“On yourself.”

He takes another sip of coffee. “Go out, forget everything for a while. This will be over when it’s over, and then we can marry. It’s complicated, but you have to trust me.”

“That ship might have sailed,” I snap.

“I know you’re upset, Erin, which is why I thought you’d prefer to be out of here.”

He’s like a stuck record and I’m the idiot who keeps hoping it’ll play the album through.

Part of me wants to throw the wrench in his works and stay. Maybe sit in the room with Sasha on my knee. But I think of Stefina. I don’t want to subject my son to her. Or myself.

My stomach lurches. The woman who just might be Sasha’s stepmother. I push a hand against my throat as burning bile surges up my throat.

“Whatever you’re thinking, stop,” he says. His eyes drill into me. “This is me going along with bullshit until I find a way out. That’s it. I’m not marrying her. I’m marrying you.”

“Maybe I don’t want to.”

My words sting in the air, and neither one of us speaks for the longest time. Then he drains his cup.

“No entourage. Just take a guard and a driver, okay, so I know you’re safe.”

“No.”

“Erin, please. I love you. I want you safe.”

“You’re ignoring what I just said.”

“I’m not,” he says. “I’m merely taking into consideration the fact you’re hurt and lashing out. I don’t want this woman even stepping foot in here and believe me, whatever her text said, she wants me about as much as I want her. Which is not at all.”

She wants him, I know it.

And Demyan?

I want to hate him, I do. Right now. I don’t like him, but I still love him and… shit. I don’t want to be here while Stefina makes googly eyes at him and swans, around taking endless selfies.

Anything is better.

“You know what? I’ll go. Sasha and I had such a great time last time without you.”

He gives me a pained look. “Not fair, Erin.”

“Not fair? None of this is fair. You want me gone so you don’t feel as guilty. ”

“Bullshit. I’m trying to make it easier for you. Go have fun, forget about everything for a while. Like I just said. Rehashing the conversation isn’t going to change it.”

“Fine.” I turn, wipe down Sasha, and pick him up, taking him upstairs to get ready.

At the very least Sasha, deserves some time away from here.

With that in mind, I call Kara.

Sasha and I are heading out when we pass the living room.

Alina is sitting on the sofa, alone, staring at a magazine on her lap.

Sasha pulls free and runs up to her. “Don’t be sad,” he says, making her smile.

I follow him in.

He’s right she looks sad, but not as destroyed as I’ve sometimes seen her before. And I get it there are ups and downs—days where she can’t get out of bed and days where life seems almost back to normal.

Except that Max is missing.

I’m okay, Sasha. Run along with your mama.”

“We’re heading out,” I begin.

She shakes her head. “I know. I don’t like her either. But…” She glances at Sasha and then at me. “He’s working on it.”

But I don’t want to talk about it, not in front of Sasha and not with Demyan’s sister.

“Come with us, Alina.”

She takes a breath. “I don’t want to intrude.”

“You’re not.”

“We’re going to the park to play.” Sasha beams. “With Kara! And Mama and you! ”

Alina hesitates, then shakes her head, laughing. “How can I say no to that?”

“You can’t,” I say. “He’s very convincing.”

She picks him up and hugs him. “You’re too cute, Sasha.”

“I know.”

And we both laugh, Sasha joining in a few seconds later, not knowing why, but for him, merriment is merriment, and his laughter is beautiful music.

Alina hands me Sasha. “I’ll go change.”

“Why? You look great.” And she does. She’s got on designer jeans and a pretty top in dark blue that matches her eyes.

“Are you sure?”

“Sure. I’m in jeans, too. But we can wait for you in the car if you want to change.”

“I’m good.”

We all head out, and Alina insists on buying Sasha an ice cream, which I have to spend time cleaning off his face, shirt, and sticky fingers, but it’s worth it for the smile he brings to her face.

Sasha loves the park and zooms around, his goat flying behind him by one leg as they run.

He plays with some other kids under the watchful eye of me and Alina and the guard. And who knows how many other guards I can’t pick out.

It makes my heart swell to see my son having such a good time. And as I now hold his goat, I’m excited about the baby growing inside me.

Sasha’s growing up, I can see that. And I’m glad his firsts won’t be my lasts.

Then it hits me.

All the firsts Demyan missed. Because of me.

Sasha’s first smile, first word, first step. First everything.

My fault .

No wonder he was so angry.

And now… Hell, is he going to be happy or angry about the pregnancy? Angry because this baby complicates things on another level. If he has to marry this other woman, as much as it makes me want to throw up, excusing away Sasha is one thing; me being knocked up is another.

Then there’s that basic level of where we are. He says he wants me and not this Stefina. The beautiful Stefina. I can’t compete with someone so glamorous and gorgeous. I can’t. What if he wants to get rid of me from his life? Another baby will make that hard.

Demyan takes duty seriously.

I don’t want to be a duty.

“Are you okay?”

I glance at Alina. “Fine, just thinking. He’s growing up.”

“He’s two. He’s got a lot more growing to do, Mama.

” Then she takes the goat and hugs it. “You know, Demyan didn’t get the goat.

I don’t think there was a lot of love in his life, even before our father remarried and I came along.

So something like the goat he sees as old and run down, not loved.

Not something given in love. But he will. ”

“I hope so.”

If he married this gorgeous Stefina and she deigns to give him babies, I hope… I swallow, clench a hand. I hope he’ll share himself like he does with Sasha.

What am I thinking? Demyan would and I start to dislike that mythical child. I’m a terrible person.

Alina touches my arm. “It’ll be okay, you know? And I think I have the best nephew ever.”

“Oh, he is,” says a voice behind us.

I turn and grin. Kara’s there.

“Kara!” Sasha speeds over and throws himself at her.

“Hi, monster.” She goes to kiss him but he rushes off again, too many things to do and he joins the other kids once more. “Took the afternoon off. Hi, Alina.”