Page 33 of Saxon

There's a distinct dearth of conversation as we make the drive to Luka's place in New Jersey, across the river from Manhattan.

Which is fine. Normally, I'm all about silence. I can spend days without saying a word to anyone about anything. But for some reason, Terra makes me chatty. It's fuckin' weird. I've said more words around her in the last couple hours than I have in probably a month.

And, I'm starting to feel the lack of sleep. And the fact that I haven't eaten in I don't know how long. My eyes burn, drooping, wanting to close. Terra has dropped off, snoring gently.

I fuckin' can't with this chick. The feathers-and-leather skirt? The boots? The fuckin' bustier? Shit, the bustier. More to the point, her tits in the bustier—I gotta keep my eyes on the road because one errant glance her way and I'll rock a hard-on for the next thirty minutes. I can't handle that, not in my current state of exhausted, hungry, frustrated irritation.

I know it's time to figure somethin' out when rumble strips jolt me awake.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I snarl.

"Whaaa…?” Terra jerks awake. “What's up? What's wrong?"

I pull onto the shoulder and put the Rover in park. I wipe my eyes with the heels of my hands.

"Saxon? What's wrong?"

I fight with my pride. "I'm falling asleep at the wheel," I finally admit. And yes, it hurts to do so. "I haven't slept in like three days. Almost four, now."

She straightens immediately. "Fuck me, Saxon, why didn't you say something?" When I don't answer, she just snorts. "Ah, right, I forgot, you're a big tough man who don't need no help from the little woman."

That stings. "I've never had anyone I could rely on. Not ever."

"What about your brothers?"

"That's tricky. Yeah, shit hits the fan, I can call 'em up for help. But it's not the same. This shit is my shit. Not yours. Not Silas's. Not Solomon's. And if I know anything about anything, they're both going through the same shit I am. When we left the club we knew what would happen, and now, it's happening." I scrub my face again. "It just ain't in me to ask for help. It ain't because you're a woman. It's because I don't fuckin' know how."

She just looks at me for a long moment. "Try it on me. I won't bite, promise."

My gut shifts, twists. My throat closes. Words dry up in my mouth. I shake my head. "I'm fine." I put the car in drive, but Terra's hand clamps down on mine and pushes it back into park.

"Fuck that. You're playing games with my life, now, asshole. You just said you're falling asleep. I felt the goddamn rumble strips, you big dumb oaf." Her words are harsh, but her tone is soft and her eyes compassionate. "Try it again. And this time, try to trust me. Look at me in the eyes, and repeat after me, okay? 'Terra, will you please drive for a while?'"

Her turquoise eyes bore into me, refusing to let me go. I'm so nauseous I could puke. "Terra, will you please drive for a while?"

The words feel like sandpaper in my throat, like dirt in my mouth.

Weak. Fuckin' weak.

My jaw is so tight my molars ache. And goddammit but she sees that shit like it's written in purple crayon on my forehead.

Her fingers trace my jawline. "Unclench, Saxon. Breathe. Yes. I can drive. I am pissed that you didn't let me see your car collection, though."

Her touch soothes—against my will, it soothes. The tension floods out of my jaw at her touch, and I roll my shoulders…she squeezes and massages there, too.

"Not my collection. My dad's. No time. Second we get a chance, I'll take you there and you can have any car you choose. Shit, have 'em all. I don't fuckin' care. Sol has his, Silas has his, and now I have mine. The rest you can fuckin' have."

“What is there?"

I reach for my door handle. "Let’s trade if we're gonna. Can't stay here long."

She climbs over the center console and slinks down my front, sliding her ass down my stomach and onto my crotch, her back to my front. Instantly, I get hard as a fuckin' steel girder. She moans, feeling it.

"You know how easy it would be, Saxon?" She tugs her skirt up. A red thong, now. Her thighs are bare, her pussy begging for me. "You could just…slide right in."

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." I can't help myself—I grind against her. "Don't fuckin' tempt me, goddammit."