Page 22 of Saxon Blade Norman Blood

Nothing stood in their way now.

In a moment William would tumble her into the bed. She could see the intention to do so in his blazing eyes, had felt his arousal pressing against the small of her back while they rode on the horse. He was ready for her.

Her heart started to beat unbearably fast.

He took a step toward her but instead of kissing her senseless, as she’d expected, he took her face in his hand and cradled it against his palm. “I cannot believe what you did for me.”

She gave a shy smile. “Neither can I. If someone had told me I would end up saving your life, I would have laughed in disbelief. Nothing of what happened between us makes sense.”

No. It did not, and yet… it felt right. Even through her nervousness, she could not ignore it. They were made for one another.

“Will you forgive me for everything I put you through, for keeping you as my prisoner for so long?” he murmured, drawing her closer.

“There is no need for forgiveness. And you never made me feel like a prisoner.”

Her arms closed around him, and she gave a sob as relief, shock, confusion, and plain desire made her legs waver. It was truly over. William buried his face into her hair and held her tight against him for a long moment.

“I still don’t know your name. I’ve wanted to ask you for a while but thought I would let you tell me when you felt comfortable. Forgive me but I cannot wait a moment longer.” He lifted her chin to trace the outline of her jaw with his thumb in a delicious caress. “What will it take for you to tell me what your name is? Will I have to kiss it out of you?”

“No,” she smiled. “My name is Rowena.”

William let out a sigh as if she had just bestowed a priceless gift onto him.

“ Rowena ,” he repeated softly. “I am going to kiss you anyway.”

At first, he was gentle, keeping his more passionate impulses in check like a man wary of frightening her with untimely fierceness. Soon the kiss became almost frantic, and she wasn’t sure if it was his or her doing.

Both probably.

He slipped one hand into her bodice as naturally as if he’d done so a hundred times before and groaned his approval into her mouth. Closing his hand around one breast, he started teasing the nipple with his fingers while his mouth carried on devouring her. It wasn’t long before despite her fears, she needed more.

Straightening his back William pressed her against his arousal. “I want you,” he rasped, speaking into the shell of her ear. Then he started to nibble at it, like he had that day in the herb garden when he had explained to her what an earlobe was.

It was too much.

She sagged against him.

“I have wanted you from that first day, when we were interrupted. I swear, Rowena, today the Devil himself can come knocking at my door—nothing will stop me from having you.”

No, nothing, except her, perhaps. At least, assuming he would listen to her doubts and heed her wishes… She had to speak now or it would be too late.

She took a step away from him. Her lips felt swollen from their urgent kiss, but the arousal in her body had turned to ice.

William saw it and his own face underwent a transformation. “What’s the matter? Sweet, speak to me.”

“I-I’m sorry but I… I’m scared.”

Rowena stood there, panting and confused, not quite knowing what to say. She was not frightened of William himself, but for all that she could not help a sense of panic. What would his reaction be when she told him she wasn’t sure she could bed him after all? He’d just told her he was ready for her, and nothing, or no one, would stop him.

When he’d kissed her, she had struggled to make sense of what was happening to her body. This kiss had been different from the one they had shared by the river, that much she knew. It had felt like a promise for more, the fiery proof of his desire. Only a man about to bed her would kiss her like this.

What if he was so lost to his desire he dismissed her qualms? She knew first-hand what men were capable of when their blood was up, and for long months, she had been afraid of lovemaking, considering it the worst thing that could happen to her.

As if that was not enough, she could not ignore that her first time would hurt—she had heard it said enough times. Virgins experienced pain. Virgins bled. All her fears could not be swept away in a heartbeat, even if she sensed William would make the moment as painless as possible for her. Try as she may, she could not get past the idea that a man’s possession had to hurt. Witnessing her mother’s assault had had a profound effect on her. In her mind, pain and suffering were irremediably linked to lovemaking. For that reason, she’d thought she would remain a virgin all her life.

And then she’d met William.

Ironically, the man who had set in motion the series of events ending in her mother’s death, the man at the heart of her fears, was the only one she could ever consider as a potential lover. That first day, when he had touched her in an incomprehensible way, he had forced her to see that what happened between a man and a woman was not necessarily painful or degrading.

It could be mind-blowing.

Yet, as delicious as his caresses had been, she was very aware that he had not entered her flesh. What if penetration hurt? What if she could not bear the pain of it? She could not conceive how it couldn’t hurt. She had never seen men’s private parts, but what she had glimpsed at the front of their hose when they were aroused made her wary of seeing more. Even now, as William had kissed her, she had felt him against her, hard as rock. Surely such hardness was impossible, unnatural. How could it not be painful to be taken by a man and have that hardness skewer her?

Gazing deep into his hazel eyes, she decided to tell him the truth. If she could not do it with him, she would not be able to do it with anyone else. He knew of her mother’s demise, so he would understand her qualms. He would be gentle if she told him the reason behind her fear, she was sure of it. Besides, if she didn’t speak out now, she would have to leave without knowing what making love to him felt like, and that thought was unbearable.

“I’m scared,” she repeated.

He gave an incredulous laugh. “Scared, you? The woman who stood up to an assembly of angry, unreasonable men to save my life, who steeled herself to murder me in the middle of a castle brimming with Norman warriors, who rode my impetuous stallion even though she is frightened of horses? That woman is scared?”

“Yes.”

The laughter died in his throat when he saw from her trembling lips that it was not a jest. His eyes softened, and he took her hands in his. “You are not scared of me, are you, Rowena? Surely you don’t think I would hurt you? After everything we’ve been through?”

“No, but I have never lain with a man. Except with you at Old Sarum, that is, even if we did not… I mean… What I’m trying to say is that I’m a virgin and…”

He visibly relaxed, as if to say that, as long as she was not afraid of him, the rest could be overcome. And perhaps it could be.

“Thank God you’re still a virgin,” he breathed stroking her cheek tenderly. “I feared many times you had been raped and never dared to tell me. In the three weeks I’ve known you, I’ve had to watch men leering after you on more occasion than I care to remember. And despite what you told me, I was not quite convinced Gilles and Sylvain had not seen you that day.”

His brow darkened. He had said “seen” but it was clear he meant “raped.” Hugues de Malemort, Leowald, the men in the clearing… It was true she had escaped assault many a time in the weeks they had spent together, and he did not even know about his two servants.

“No,” she told him quietly. “No man has ever bedded me.”

“Listen, Rowena. I want you more than I can say, we both know that.” He glanced briefly at the bulge at the front of his hose and gave a grunt. Indeed, he could not lie. He was desperate for her. “But if you are scared, I will not touch you. I will wait. Because I don’t just want you in my bed. I want you in my life.”

Instinct told her it took him all his resolve to promise not to take her when he was bursting with need. She immediately shook her head.

“No. I want you to touch me. I never thought such a thing would happen, but with you I feel I could overcome my dread of lovemaking.” Desire flared in his eyes at her words. “I am only telling you because I have been afraid of it ever since my mother…”

She could not finish but he nodded and drew her into his arms. “It is all too understandable that you should be wary after witnessing that terrible scene. You would be scarred by the experience and associate lovemaking with pain and humiliation, how could you not? You probably think men as dumb brutes only governed by lust, and I’m ashamed to say all too often they are.”

“I don’t think that, not precisely, and I know you’re nothing like that. But I’m afraid it will hurt.”

He hesitated, as if loath to tell her the truth. “I hate the idea, but, yes, it might well hurt you the first time. All I can promise is to be as gentle as I can be and do everything I can do to make you comfortable before and after,” he told her, before placing a chaste kiss on her lips. “Go outside, think about it. Come back later if you feel you want to try. I will be here, waiting for you.”

Yes. Perhaps a moment alone would calm her nerves.

After a brief walk around the bailey under a sky full of stars, Rowena wandered to the herb garden. With a smile she picked a sprig of the spiky plant William had introduced to her a week ago.

“Rosemary,” she said to herself before lifting it to her nose.

As the sharp, resiny scent hit her, so did the reality of the situation. What was she doing here all alone when William was waiting for her in bed! He wanted her, she wanted him, he had promised to be gentle, and she trusted him. She should be in his arms, kissing him senseless.

Throwing the sprig to the ground she ran back to his room.

As she opened the door, her gaze darted to the bed. It was empty. Just as she started to wonder where he might be, his voice reached her from the corner of the room.

“In here.”

Rowena turned—and her mouth dropped open.

He was sitting in a bathtub, smiling at her with such tenderness the floor wavered from under her.

“You can join me if you like.”

His thoughtfulness moved her. How had he guessed that she would be less intimidated if they took their time and shared a bath first? He’d always seemed to know what would bring her comfort. This was just perfect.

“Yes. I will join you.”

“I can close my eyes while you get undressed if you prefer.” Although he kept his voice neutral, his eyes caught fire at the thought of her taking her clothes off in front of him. In that moment Rowena was reminded of the man who had ordered her to bare herself to him.

She allowed a smile to play on her lips. “No. You can watch me if you like. I know you would enjoy it.”

He had already seen her practically naked once and, though she was nervous about the pain of his possession, she had no qualms about him seeing her body. He had been sufficiently generous in his praise of her beauty for her to know he found her to his tastes. Moreover, she remembered how arousing it had been to bare herself to him.

Without the least hesitation, Rowena lifted her dress over her head, then her shift, dropping them both on the floor as naturally as if she had been on her own. Then she padded to the tub, enjoying the caress of William’s gaze over her naked body. A shiver of anticipation went down her spine, and soon there was not a single place on her skin that was not throbbing with need.

Finally. This was it.

*

Mon Dieu .

William took in the sight of Rowena so innocently displayed in front of him and the strength of his desire wrenched a groan out of him. He was harder than he had ever been, throbbing with need. How was he going to find the control she deserved? She was so beautiful! Her skin was so smooth and creamy calling for his caresses, her hair was cascading down her back in a riot of curls, her customary brazenness was making her eyes sparkle.

He could not believe in a moment he would get to hold this incredible woman in his arms.

Reclining in the tub, he placed his hands on top of his erection, in case she should see something under the water that would frighten her. Virgin or not, it was understandable she should be wary of lovemaking after seeing her mother attacked by two men. Her admission that she was untouched had been a relief. Ever since she’d told him about her mother’s assault he’d worried she was hiding the true extent of what Gilles and Sylvain had done that day. There was little doubt they would have assaulted her too if they’d seen her. Young and beautiful, she would have been an irresistible prey for the two brutes.

But no, they had not touched her. She was still a virgin, and wary of being possessed.

Perhaps she’d had a previous experience with an unscrupulous man. He’d seen for himself men lusted after her, and if someone from her village had been rough with her, pressing his unwelcome advances onto her, he might have given her a negative image of what men could do to her body. In any case, he did not want to make her any more nervous than she already was, which was why he had asked for the bathtub to be prepared.

To his relief, the blue in her eyes when she came to him was not hazy with anguish, but vibrant with anticipation. She stepped into the tub with confidence. As soon as the warm water hit her toes, she let out a sigh of satisfaction. William remembered how he had admired her feet that day by the river. They were so dainty, so feminine. His fingers already itched to stroke them.

She sat down. The tub was big but not so big that they did not touch. When her calf slid against his wet skin and her toes grazed the inside of his thigh, she moaned. At the sound, William came closer to her. He had never heard anything so enticing as that moan and he intended to make sure to hear it again and again.

“You are so beautiful, Rowena. I know I’ve already told you, but you truly are.” He brushed a strand of hair away from her shoulders. “And never more so now that you are naked and in my arms. I have never seen a woman like you.”

“But you have,” she countered with a slight smile. “Cwenhild looks similar to me. She has blue eyes and ginger hair too.”

He gave a sigh. Even though she was only teasing him, he hated her having to think of the other women he had bedded in that moment. He wished he could erase them from his life and her memory.

“It’s hardly surprising you should share your coloring as you are both Saxons but that’s as far as it goes, trust me.”

Rowena’s mouth twisted. “Mmm, yes, you have a point. Sharing physical attributes does not necessarily mean you look the same. After all, your coloring is similar to that of the other Norman barons, yet I have never seen a man like you.”

“Good. I would hate to think you considered me unremarkable.”

“I wouldn’t dare. You are nothing if not remarkable.” Her gaze wandered over his chest in clear appreciation—and then froze. “But… You didn’t tell me you’d been hurt last night!” she cried out, brushing a finger on a red mark running all the way down the side of his chest.

Goosebumps covered his skin. It was the first time she had touched his naked body and he would make sure it was not the last.

“’Tis nothing,” he rasped.

“But this is not nothing.” She touched his cheek, where he knew the cut she had inflicted him was still very visible. “Will you ever for—”

“Forgiven. I do not want to talk about the reason why you came to me ever again. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that you did come to me.”

He kissed her, running his hands along the wet skin of her thighs before forcing himself to draw back. They would have to take this slowly.

“Can I?” he asked, before taking one of her feet in his hands.

“Why ask the question? You already have,” she mocked.

But when he started to caress her toes, her head rolled backward to rest on the edge of the tub. She closed her eyes and let out a long whimper of pleasure.

Pleased by her reaction, William worked his fingers over the arch of her foot, all the while looking at her, reclining in abandon against the tub. Her breasts were half submerged, glistening wet with their rosy tips peeking just above the water. It was such a tantalizing sight that he lowered his head to look at the foot in his hands instead, for fear of going to her there and then, whether she was ready or not. He certainly was ready for her. His whole body ached with the effort it took him to keep his urges under control.

When his fingers slipped between her toes Rowena begged him to stop. “Enough. This is heavenly, but I want something else,” she croaked.

“If you want me to love you, I will. But you are a virgin. I do not want to hurt you, yet I will when I first enter you.” It was inevitable. He gritted his teeth. Why did she have to be the one to suffer? Why couldn’t it be him? “All I can promise is to do everything I can to make the rest as pleasurable as possible for you.” He already knew he would hate to see her pain.

“I know.”

“If you want me to stop at any point, you will only have to tell me.”

Even as he spoke the words William hoped he would be able to honor this promise. He did not want to hurt Rowena but his desire for her was so strong, he feared he might not be able to keep a clear head. He was painfully hard, overwhelmed by his need for her. Would he be able to stop once he had buried himself inside her flesh?

He was not certain.

“Have you bedded many virgins?” The candor with which she asked the question left him quite speechless.

“A few,” he answered cautiously, not knowing if she would be reassured by the fact or appalled at the extent of his depravity.

After all she might think he didn’t have the right to deflower a woman he had no intention of marrying. But if that was the case, what was she doing there?

“Did it hurt them?”

“As far as I could tell, not unbearably so. And they seemed to forget the pain rather quickly.” This was true at least. “If you trust me, then—”

“I do, I do trust you.” No hesitation showed in her clear eyes. She was once more the fierce woman he had come to love. “Make love to me, William.”

It was the first time she’d used his name. As soon as she said it, he knew he wanted to hear her say it again, then again and again, for the rest of his life. In this instant, his decision was made and he marveled how he had not thought to ask her before.

He lifted her onto his lap, making sure to keep her away from his throbbing hardness. “Before I do, please tell me something.”

“Yes. Anything.”

She came closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, the look in her eyes blazing. Was she about to kiss him? He spoke before she could, because he knew as soon as she placed her lips on his, he would be lost.

And he really needed to speak.

“Say you will marry me as soon as it is possible,” he breathed, his mouth at her temple. “Tomorrow if we can. I need you in my life.”

*

Rowena blinked a few times.

William just proposed to her?

“You want to m-marry me?” she stammered.

“Yes. I do not think I could bear to let you go, and as you know, I have no need of an interpreter. So stay. As my wife.”

She had not thought beyond this day, but of course she would never be able to leave him either. Never sleep in his arms again, never see his smile, never hear his voice… It was unthinkable. She would rather die.

And so there was only one answer she could give him.

“Yes. I will stay. I will marry you.”

His hazel eyes flashed. “I want you. And I will want only you for the rest of my life. I want to sleep with you in my arms every night. I want to see you swell with my child. I want to grow old with you by my side. I want everything, and the rest.”

She moved to settle herself more comfortably onto his lap, fired up by the notion that this man wanted her, in every way. He wanted to spend the rest of life with her, he’d just promised her fidelity.

And he desired her.

It was impossible to ignore the fact. Her eyes widened when she felt his hardness between her thighs, ready to plunge inside her body. Tentatively she edged closer and placed herself above it. Could she—

“Wait, my beauty. Not yet, not like that. Take your time.” William dipped his head to kiss the crook of her neck and only stopped when she let her head roll backward. “First let me prepare you for me.”

Rowena felt his hand slide along her hip then move over to the place between her thighs. Just when his fingers reached her most intimate part, his mouth, hot and wet, closed on her nipple. She moaned out loud, overwhelmed by a wave of sensations so extraordinary it threatened to engulf her. This was heavenly, not frightening at all.

He teased her in this way for a long moment, brushing the tip of his fingers against her feminine folds, circling a hard little nub at the center of it, sucking at her nipple, giving little grunts of approval all the while, as if he was enjoying the moment as much as she was. She could feel her whole body relax, and become slick. Then his movements changed.

Slowly one of his fingers eased itself inside her. She gasped at the newness of the sensation. This was wondrous, nothing like the intrusion she had dreaded for so long.

The hand stilled.

“Does it hurt?” William asked in concern, his mouth at her breast. He had not taken that liberty at Old Sarum.

“No, no it’s… My God ,” she squeaked when he slipped another finger inside her.

Rowena’s whole body quivered and melted at the same time. William drew his fingers out carefully then plunged inside her silken depths again. She moaned. He moved again. She inhaled sharply. He did it again, this time more forcefully.

Rowena cried out loud when he flicked his thumb against the place at the apex of her thighs and a heartbeat later, her body shattered, squeezing around him. She let out a long rasp as the piercing pleasure ebbed into a delicious torpor.

“No, maybe it didn’t hurt after all,” William purred when her muscles clenched around him in one last, slow, delicious spasm. “And now, my sweet, you are as ready as you are going to be. As am I. Now I can make you mine at last.”

With those words he settled her above his shaft. He did not move, but let her adjust to the sensation of having his hardness poised against her flesh, ready to enter her. He waited for her to move first—and welcome him in.

Without the least hesitation she lowered herself onto him, stopping halfway down. He kept very still and gritted his teeth, as if fighting the impulse to move under her. She was new to this, but she knew that his body, used to pleasure, would be urging him to drive into her deeper, faster, to take what it needed.

Grateful for William’s restraint, determined to put an end to the awful uncertainty, Rowena gripped his shoulders to lift herself off him. Then she sat down and took him to the hilt. A sharp cry escaped her lips, and she grimaced. Perhaps on second thought she had been too forceful.

But at least it was done. And it was not the agony she had feared.

William’s face froze in consternation. “I’m sorry, I don’t…” he said in a breath, kissing her temple.

“It’s all right,” she panted. He’d not done anything wrong. This had been her doing. “I know.”

She did not move, waiting until the pain subsided. Eventually, she lifted herself off almost entirely before allowing him to plunge into her soft folds again, tentatively at first, then again, deeper this time. It was already better.

William bit his lip and let out a growl. She guessed he was calling on all his powers of restraint to last until she’d been satisfied.

She gave him a brief thank you kiss.

At first, he let her find a rhythm which suited her but when pleasure built inside her again, she made a series of little moans that sent him over the edge. He grabbed her hips in a strong hold and bucked upward to meet her, thrust for thrust.

Yes ! This was exactly what she needed. Rowena dug her nails into his shoulders, loving the way he’d taken over, making the movements a lot more satisfying. Water sloshed out of the tub, but neither of them cared. He reared upward in one mighty surge, and she gave a startled cry, something between a mewling sound and a gasp.

“Forgive me,” he rasped, stopping at once. “I got carried away.”

“Oh no, don’t stop, not now,” she urged, grinding her hips against his. She needed more friction, more heat. All the pain was gone, replaced by the most exquisite pleasure. “More, William, please, mo…”

The rest of the word was lost in a rasp when she fell, shuddering, against his chest. The furious clenching of her release triggered his in turn. He closed his arms around her and stilled after pumping inside her one last time, flooding her with delicious warmth.

Rowena thought she had lost her body. Surely it had dissolved in the water around her. She lay in William’s arms for a long moment, floating on the edge of consciousness. Everything around her was liquid, apart from the solidity of his embrace.

To think a few weeks ago she had thought it would be demeaning to sit on a man’s lap to be made love to. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Idly, she wondered what else she would discover in William’s arms in the weeks to come and smiled. A lifetime of such delights was ahead of them.

“Are you all right, my love?” he asked, his own chest heaving with the intensity of his pleasure.

Somehow she found the strength to lift her head. “I am more than all right. This was…”

She rubbed her cheek against his smooth chest as she searched for the best word to describe the experience. She could not find a single one, whether in his language or hers.

“I know. It was like that for me too.” William gave her cheek a tender stroke.

“I love you,” she whispered. “I’m afraid I forgot to tell you before.”

He chuckled. “I love you too. Didn’t I say?”

“No. But I guessed you did. After all, you asked me to marry you.”

“Yes. I suppose that made it clear.”

They stayed tangled for a long moment then she gave a shiver. “I’m cold,” she admitted with laughter in her voice. It seemed an awfully mundane thing to say after what they had just experienced but she was chilled.

“Yes. So am I. I was waiting for you to be ready before moving, but I’m about to go numb with cold. Let’s get out.”

Rowena stood up—and William groaned.

“What is it?” Was he in pain?

“Do you have any idea how arousing you are right now?” he asked, looking at the water cascading down her body, gliding over her breasts and rushing to the soft center of her. “I am anything but cold all of a sudden.”

With a smile she wrapped herself in one of the linen sheets lying by the tub then turned around in time to see him emerge from the tub. Her mouth opened in shock when she saw the hardness jutting between his legs.

William looked her straight in the eye, then glanced briefly downward. “Now you know why I wanted to be in the water when you entered the room. I thought it might frighten you to see a man’s arousal.”

She gulped. He had shown incredible foresight. Had she seen this before he had taken her into his arms, she would have panicked. As it was, she had to accept that, however big and hard it seemed to be, it could enter her body without causing any damage to her. Quite the opposite.

“Thank you. But… does that mean you want me again?” she asked shyly.

“Yes. I do want you,” he acknowledged ruefully, wrapping a linen sheet around his loins. “I cannot lie, you have just seen how much. But I cannot take you again so soon. You will be sore. Don’t worry, it will go down after a while.”

“Will it?” Feeling bold, she allowed the linen sheet to fall to the floor. Suddenly she wasn’t cold either.

William took in a sharp breath. “It won’t if you do this,” he warned, feasting his eyes on her curves.

“Oh. And if I did that?” Moved by a wicked impulse, she brought her hands up to cup her breasts.

She held them a moment then started to tease the nipples provocatively. A sigh escaped her lips, charged with ill- concealed desire. She let her head roll backward and looked at William through half-closed eyelids, hoping he would find her teasing as arousing as she did.

Apparently, he did. His eyes had almost changed color. “Rowena. Please.”

He spoke through clenched teeth, but she was not prepared to be merciful. She wanted to see how far she could provoke him.

“As you wish,” she said, choosing to believe he was pleading for more.

Her hands skimmed along her flanks, slowly. William looked about to pounce. The sight of his desire lit hers in turn. Knowing how close he was to surrendering, she lay onto the bed and placed her hand between her legs. A finger came to tease her soft folds and she gave a moan.

Immediately his hands went to his hips. There was rustle as the discarded cloth fell on the floor at his feet. He walked over to her and knelt at the foot of the bed, eyes ablaze, naked and magnificent. It was just like that night at Old Sarum, when he had asked her to touch herself.

“If you do that then I will have to watch you,” he breathed, his mouth hovering just above her ankle. “And then I will have to take you again, whether you are ready or not.”

A slow smile bloomed on her lips. “That is exactly what I hoped you would say.”