Page 51 of Savage Promises (Quinlan Empire #2)

Lennox

P acking up that afternoon feels surreal.

I try not to cry at every zipper I force closed on my mismatched suitcase and carry bag.

I feel like a hobo without a proper set of high-end matching luggage.

As if packing what’s left of my life into twelve pieces of classic Louis Vuitton cases would make me feel better.

Regardless, I’ll leave here with my head held high. Even though I’m on the verge of a breakdown. Leaving Shane, the man I’ve loved most of my life, is simply soul-crushing.

The house beyond my door is quiet, teasing me like a fragile emptiness that Shane wants to return to. He didn’t want to marry Neve. He didn’t want to marry anyone. Just saw it as a duty. It’s no surprise he divorced me so easily.

God, I’m not even thirty and I’ll be divorced!

Someone knocks on my door.

“Come in.”

“You need help?” Dorian asks gruffly.

“No.” I shake my head. “I’ve got it.”

He hesitates, shifting his weight from side to side. “I’m still assigned to you, you know. Orders haven’t changed.”

My chest tightens. Shane hasn’t cut off my protection, even now.

“Thanks,” I say quietly, “But I don’t even know where I’ll be living yet. And wherever it is, I won’t have an extra room for guards.”

“Then I’ll watch you from my car.” He puts his hands behind his back. The dedication of the men who protect the Quinlans astounds me.

“If those are your orders.” I look away to pack up Hawk last .

He meows ruefully when I lift him away from his perch, his favorite tree disappearing from his little yellow eyes. “I’m sorry, buddy.”

Into the carrier he goes, hissing and trying to scratch me. It breaks my heart and a teardrop beads up on the plastic case as I secure him inside.

It wasn’t lost on me last night in the middle of the horrific confrontation with Shane how he said Hawk can say, but I had to leave. He’s been doubling up on those patches and suffering in silence because of his allergies. Yet, he’d take that massive discomfort over living with me.

That’s how much I hurt him by not opening up to him. By not trusting him.

With everything packed up, I take one last look at my bedroom. Shane wouldn’t even share a bed with me. Except to fuck me.

Dorian carries my bags, walking stoically behind me. It’s so embarrassing. I’ve been ordered to leave. Thrown out.

Liz stands near the stairs, her hands wringing in front of her. Her eyes are red-rimmed, her lips pressed into a thin line.

“Can I do anything to help, dear?” she says softly, the sadness in her voice hard to hide.

I force a smile, my throat thick with emotion. “Take care of Shane for me. He acts like he doesn’t need anyone, but he really does.”

A catch in my throat sets more tears free, and I quickly wipe them away.

Dorian carries my suitcases to my old Mercedes saying he’ll follow me. I settle Hawk next to me in the front seat. As I pull away from the curb, I don’t look back.

I can’t. I’m not strong enough.

With any decent hotel barring cats, and knowing I’m probably not welcome back at The Sterling, I have no choice but to throw myself on Mara’s mercy.

Thankfully, when I called her, she told me her spare bedroom is free.

It will have to do until I’m brave enough to face the New York City real estate market.

Shane made no arrangements for me this time.

Maybe he thought I’d go back to Astoria to live with my dad.

Or he figured with twenty million dollars I’d be all right.

That check sits uncashed at the bottom of my purse.

Mara wraps me in a tight hug in the doorway of her Murray Hill pre-war apartment. “I could kill him,” she mutters, squeezing me. “I swear to God.”

I let out a wary laugh. “That’s a mob boss you just threatened.” Glancing over my shoulder, I remark to Dorian, who stands stiffly in the hallway, “She’s kidding.”

“I got it.” Mara takes my bags from him.

Like a soldier, he clicks his heels and spins to leave. I’m not going to think about where he’ll be. I don’t need protection. I’m no longer a Quinlan.

“Come on,” Mara says gently, guiding me to a tiny second bedroom in the back of the apartment. “It’s not much, but it’s clean and yours for as long as you need.”

I glance at the twin bed, the small dresser, and the single window facing an alley. I stifle a laugh at the absurdity this has all turned into.

“It’s fine. Thank you,” I say, setting Hawk’s carrier down. “I’ll start looking for a place soon.”

Mara folds her arms. “You’ve got twenty million dollars, Lennox. You could buy a penthouse tomorrow.”

I reach into my purse and pull out the check, staring at it like it might bite me. “I don’t even know where to deposit something this big.”

Mara whistles, staring at it. “I know a realtor who also manages finances. She’ll hook you up.”

I nod, but my hand drifts to my stomach, and suddenly, the tears come again. “I’ll need two bedrooms in about seven months.”

Mara’s eyes widen. “Oh my God. Are you pregnant?”

I swallow hard, my voice barely a whisper. “Yeah. I am.”

Damn crappy implant was no match for Shane’s powerful and abundant swimmers. Two pink lines showed up this morning when I had to face the reality that my period was six days late.

“And he still divorced you?” Her face twists in horror.

“I never told him. I didn’t get a chance.”

“Lennox! You’re carrying a mafia heir ! They take that shit deadly serious.”

“My baby is a Donnelly.” I shake my head. “I’m thinking they’ll turn the other cheek this one time.”

I can’t say for sure how Norah would feel if her son walked away from her blood.

Mara stares at me like I’ve lost my mind. “You really believe someone won’t come for that baby?”

“If you don’t want me to stay here—”

“Of course, I do!” Mara throws her arms around me.

I sink into her embrace, loving how it feels. “I know I can’t keep it a secret forever. Shane is in Ireland. I’ll tell him once all the dust settles and he’s back to his numb self where this will just be one more thing he has to fix for his family.”

“What can I do to help?” Mara asks, sitting on the bed.

“I need some water for Hawk.” I take out his bowl.

“Got it.” Mara snatches it from me and bounces away.

I let Hawk out of his carrier. He sniffs the unfamiliar space and gives me a disgruntled meow. His favorite window ledge is gone. The view of a big tree with birds is now a brick wall.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, rubbing his ears.

While he pouts, I busy myself setting up his food on a mat in the corner.

With my emotions turned off, I put away my clothes and wander into the kitchen where Mara is cooking an early dinner of tacos for us. She needs to get to the club by seven. My assistant manager is covering for me tonight. I didn’t want to leave Hawk alone in a strange place.

He’s been through so much.

I settle on a stool, wishing I could have a margarita with the tacos when my phone rings and it’s Neve.

“Hi, you,” I try to sound chipper.

“I got into USC,” she says breathlessly. “Someone from the school called me today. I can start in the summer session.”

“That’s great news, Neve. What do you need from me?” I say, my voice cracking.

“Nothing. It’s all taken care of. Some foundation is paying for it. All four years.”

My stomach sinks. Shane did this. He’s even taking my sister from me.

“What about finishing Astoria Prep?”

“I spoke to my guidance counselor. I can take my last final exam in his office tomorrow and be in California by next week,” she says, her voice laced with excitement.

“That’s...so soon.” I struggle to breathe.

“The admission counselor there arranged a clinic for me to get my arm ready by fall. Lennox, I’m so happy.”

I push away feeling sorry for myself and appreciate that my little sister is getting her dream after all. It’s what I do. I’ve learned not to be selfish. I accept that I still have my club. That was my dream. I just don’t have the man of my dreams.

“What did Dad say?” Silence rings out. “Neve?”

“He shrugged and told me I was as useless as...” She stops.

“As me.” Fucking old-world men’s view of women. We’re just tools for them to use.

“Listen, I’ll stop by this weekend to help you pack and make sure you have everything you need.”

“Lennox?” Neve’s voice gets small, like she’s afraid. “I’m sorry. I know I’ve been a bitch to you.”

I smile, appreciating that she’s taking responsibility for her behavior.

“It’s big of you to apologize. It’s part of growing up.

I think USC will be great for you. You’ll finally be out from under Dad’s thumb and figure out how to be independent.

It’s a pretty great feeling taking care of yourself. ”

“I’ll miss you.”

I sniff, feeling the cloud of anger and resentment break away. “You’re going to California. Not the moon. I’ll visit.”

I cradle my stomach as I say that, wondering how I’ll manage with a baby. On my own.

“Oh, I have a call from an advisor on the other line, I have to take this.”

“Go. I’ll see you this weekend.”

The line goes dead and it all hits me.

“I can’t eat right now, Mara.” I push the plate of tacos away. “You go to work. I’ll clean up.”

“Lennox, what happened?”

“Neve got into USC.” I wipe away tears. “She’s leaving in a week.”

Mara frowns. “Okay. What about you?”

Straightening my back, I say, “I’m the owner of Luxe. That will have to be enough.”

THE NEXT FEW DAYS PASS and I bury myself with the routine of running the club. Everything there is going smoothly. It’s always that way. When one part of your life falls apart, the other parts seem to fall into place. Or maybe it seems that way.

On Saturday afternoon, I go home to Astoria to help Neve pack. My father barely acknowledges what’s happening, slumped on his recliner watching a Yankee game.

Before I say anything, he mutters, waving a glass full of whiskey. “I knew he’d throw you out. He didn’t want to marry you any more than he wanted to marry Neve.”

I shake my head, disgust curling in my gut. “You’re pathetic.”

He glances at me with murky eyes. “Where’s the money?”

“My money?” Fire rages through my veins. “ My divorce settlement?”

Dad snarls at me. “We arranged that settlement. You agreed to hand it over.”

“I agreed to no such thing,” I snap. “And Neve has her scholarship.”

Dad bolts from his chair, his expression as dark as I’ve ever seen. “Now you listen to me. You’re a Donnelly again. That makes you mine. I can and will sell you to the Bratva or the Albanians in a heartbeat. I want that money.”

With Neve secure and Dorian protecting me I have nothing to lose. “You can rot in hell.”

My father grips me by the throat, but the sharp click of a gun being cocked fills the air.

Garrett emerges from the hallway leading to Dad’s office, his piece aimed squarely at our father’s head. “Get your fucking hands off my sister, old man,” he says coolly.

My father hesitates, then lets me go. “Traitor. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you, Garrett.”

My brother’s shoulders are square and there’s a light in his eyes I’ve not seen in a long time. “At the expense of your daughters. What kind of man does that make you? I won’t be that man. Not anymore. Go get your final payday somewhere else. Sell your soul. You won’t use my sisters again.”

Final payday? A term I heard whispered in his office before. Dad wants to disappear.

“I’ll sell Club Echelon,” he mutters.

Garrett laughs. “Go ahead. That place fell apart without Lennox. You can have it back.”

For the first time in forever, my father looks so small and helpless, I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.

Keeping his gun trained on my father with one hand, my brother rests the other on the small of my back as he steers me to the front door.

“What about Neve?” My throat tight, I worry about leaving her behind after such a dark incident.

Garrett brushes my cheek. “I’ll get her packed and on the plane. Live your life, Lennox. You’re free now.”

I cock my head and stare at him. “You’re clean, aren’t you?”

“Two weeks.” He clears his throat. “One day at a time. But I see what I have to do now. You took care of so much for so long. It’s my turn. Your watch has ended, Donnelly,” he gets husky, quoting our favorite show.

“I’m here if you need me. If Neve needs me,” I stress and then leave because my father isn’t going to stand idly by while Garrett and I engage in a long goodbye.

Outside on the street, I breathe in the smell of summer knocking on Astoria’s doorstep. The earthy scent of trees coming back to life and fragrant early blooms in flowerbeds are comforts from the past. But I won’t be back here. Not with Neve gone. And not with...

My gaze drifts across the street.

Quinlan Manor stands like a beacon of my jealousy for so many years. That happy house is as strong a memory as the smell of spring in the air.

I should march right over there and tell Norah I’m pregnant.

I should fight for my baby to have a place in her family.

But a black car pulls up, and I see Ewan hop out clutching his youngest baby girl in one arm.

His oldest daughter Sadie gets out next followed by Maggie chasing after her big sister the way Neve chased after me.

The girls run up the front steps, their laughter finding my ears from across the street.

Bad timing.

I get into my old Benz instead. I don’t belong there. And I don’t belong here anymore.

As I drive away, I settle into the comfort zone I’ve felt my whole life: I am truly, utterly alone.