Page 11 of Saddles and Snowstorms (Sagebrush Cowboys #4)

“Hurt worse when my old man got done yellin’ at me for being stupid,” I admitted, surprised at how easily the words came. I hadn’t talked this much to anyone in months, maybe years.

Across the table, Colt was getting louder, clearly noticing he’d lost Rowan’s attention. I could feel his eyes on us, watching as Rowan’s fingers lingered a second too long on my skin. Something possessive flared in me as I let my shirt fall back into place, but I didn’t move away.

“Your dad sounds like mine,” Rowan said with a soft laugh. “Always expecting the worst, always right when it happened. ”

“Jack wasn’t my dad,” I clarified, taking another swig of beer. “He was the foreman on my parents’ ranch before they passed. Took me in after. Taught me everything I know. I just call him my old man because he was the only one I knew.”

Rowan’s eyes softened. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

I shrugged. “Was a long time ago.”

The conversation around us had grown rowdier, with Beau and Colt trading stories about their wildest rides. I caught Colt glancing our way again, his expression unreadable as he noted how Rowan leaned toward me, our shoulders nearly touching.

“So, Brooks,” Rowan said, rolling my name around in his mouth like he was tasting it. “What made you decide to stay in Sagebrush? Most people seem to leave as soon as they can.”

The question caught me off guard. No one had ever asked me that before. Most folks in town just accepted that I was part of the landscape, like the old oak tree by Miller’s Creek or the rusted windmill at the edge of town.

“Never saw a reason to leave,” I said finally, turning the beer bottle in my hands. “The land’s been in my family for generations. Seemed wrong to abandon it.”

“But you run it all alone,” he pressed, those green eyes studying me with genuine curiosity. “That’s a lot for one person. And isn’t it lonely?”

I shrugged. “I like the quiet. And I got a system that works.”

“I can respect that,” he nodded, taking another sip of his beer. His throat worked as he swallowed, and I found myself staring at the movement. “After what happened in Austin, quiet sounds pretty damn good to me too.”

Before I could ask what he meant, Colt’s chair scraped back loudly. He sauntered over, looking like he wanted to stir up trouble. He stopped next to Rowan’s chair, holding out a hand. “You wanna dance, handsome?”

“Colt! Leave him alone,” I heard Lucas call from the other end of the table. “You got enough of an audience over here. And a boyfriend of your own.”

Boyfriend?! I glanced up at Colt as he winked at a well-dressed man with brown hair and amber eyes at the other end of the table.

If I wasn’t mistaken, that was Eli Daniels.

He was a few years younger than me, but I recognized him, nonetheless.

He and Colt were together? When did that macho rodeo star turn gay? Eli I’d heard about. But Colt?

“No thanks, Colt,” Rowan said, cool as a cucumber. Instead, he looked to me. “If I’m gonna dance with anyone, I’d rather it was Brooks here.”

My heart stopped as our eyes met, and not in a good way. Colt, however, didn’t give me a chance to process the implication without butting in.

“I didn’t know you were one of us, Brooks,” he said, slapping me hard on the back. “Good for you! You definitely chose the right party to drop in on!”

It was at that moment that I realized, somewhat sheepishly, that everyone in the group was a man.

Not only that, but several of them weren’t just sitting next to one another.

They were holding hands, whispering in each other’s ears, or exchanging small intimate gestures that I hadn’t noticed.

In fact, I’d been so foolishly wrapped up in listening to Rowan and mesmerized by how beautiful he was that I’d barely seen anything else.

“What do you say, Brooks?” Rowan smiled as he held out his hand. “Wanna dance?”

I cleared my throat, putting my beer down hastily. “I… I’m not…”

“Aww, don’t be shy!” Colt added, egging me on. “Rowan’s too handsome to turn down!”

My heart pounded in my chest and before I knew what I was doing, I was on my feet.

But instead of taking Rowan’s hand, I just glanced at him nervously and ran out the door.

I stumbled out into the cool evening air, my lungs burning like I’d just wrestled a steer.

The sun had nearly set, painting the sky in deep purples and fading orange.

My truck was right where I’d left it, and I made a beeline for it, fumbling with my keys.

I had to get out of there, away from whatever this was before it awakened something I didn’t want to deal with.

“Brooks! Wait!”

I froze at the sound of Rowan’s voice. Part of me wanted to jump in my truck and disappear down the road, back to the safety of my empty ranch house. But something kept my feet planted to the ground as I heard his footsteps approaching from behind .

“I’m sorry,” he said, slightly out of breath. “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that.”

I turned around slowly, keeping my eyes fixed on the gravel beneath my boots. “It’s fine,” I muttered, though it clearly wasn’t.

“No, it’s not.” He stepped closer, close enough that I could smell his cologne—that woodsy scent that made my stomach tighten. “I misread the situation. I thought... well, it doesn’t matter what I thought. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.”

I finally looked up at him, at those concerned green eyes studying my face. He was genuinely worried about me. It made my heart ache, showing me just how truly lonely I was. But that realization quickly turned to anger.

“I don’t need your pity,” I spat.

“I wasn’t?—”

“I like being alone,” I said, forcing the words out from between my lips. “I don’t want you or your friends bothering me. And tell Dolly I don’t want any more of her meddling either. I just want to live my life without anybody else trying to come in and mess it up!”

I was shouting by the time I made it to the final word. Rowan stood there though, calmly taking it all. Instead of shouting back at me, which I knew I deserved, he just let out a small sigh.

“I’m sorry, Brooks,” he nodded, casting his gaze toward the ground. “It won’t happen again.”

With that, he turned back toward the diner, shoulders drooping. I felt my hand twitch, like I wanted to reach out, grab him, and stop him from leaving. I wanted to tell him that I enjoyed his company, that he was interesting to me, and a million other things to try to make it all better.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I stood there, watching him until he was through the diner doors once more.

Rowan was too young and too full of life to want someone like me.

And I was too broken to let anyone in. I’d sworn to myself long ago that I’d never let that happen again.

So, despite how bad we were both feeling in that moment, I knew it was best to just turn around and drive away, leaving him and all hope of anything more behind.

And that’s exactly what I did.