Page 16

I HADN’T THE time to mull things over, because Ve returned so quickly after dropping me off that night, I doubted he’d left at all.

I’d gotten the chance to change into the simple navy tunic with long cotton sleeves, and was just tying the rope around my waist when his gentle knock came at the door, followed by his voice. He must have left, for he’d changed too, into something more closely resembling a Viking boy than a Norse god. When I opened the door, I found his tunic was frayed, his gold calf plates left behind, and his hair pulled up into a messy tangle until I could almost believe he’d just come up from the farmland and would smell of the earth and of trouble. His smile certainly looked like it. As if he was searching for trouble tonight, and had come to my door.

I opened it further to let him in. I wasn’t looking for trouble, but I was homesick, and right now, he was the closest thing to home I could find.

The door shut with a click, and we were left in the dim, hollow light. As I looked at Ve, I noted one difference between him and a Viking—the difference that had always been there. He wore no axe. Now, I knew why. I was painfully aware of my own axe on my bed upstairs, waiting to be sharpened.

I made it a point to sit on the sofa in the foyer instead of going upstairs where the axe was.

“My friends like you,”

Ve said as he turned himself about Hitta Haven like he’d never seen the inside before. I kept all the curtains open to let in the light, but now it was dark, and the night sank to drown the room in shadows. Two oil lamps burned upstairs where I slept, and their buttery light crept down the staircase.

“I like them,”

I answered. I stayed on the sofa, one knee bent to curl my foot underneath me as I started undoing my braid from the day. It was wound tightly, with snags that wouldn’t easily come undone. My calloused fingers worked through them nevertheless. All the while watching Ve.

Ve seemed to carry his own snags. Troubles rested on his shoulders like knots in his tunic, stiffening his back as he moved until I wondered how long they’d been there. I knew about his rough faoir. Now I knew about his sister. How many other things were there—struggles resting beneath the surface—coiling him until he could snap?

When we met, he’d said he wasn’t interested in getting married. I’d taken that as he didn’t want to marry me. Now I wondered if he didn’t want to get close to anyone. He had friends, but as far as I knew, never anything more. Perhaps that was how he wanted to keep things. Distant enough that his heart couldn’t hurt from a loss. Simple enough that he could remove himself in a heartbeat if needed.

And call it the Viking desire in me to compete, but I saw him as a challenge. What would it take to get him to fall in love?

More importantly, did I want to fall in love again?

“Are you okay?”

Ve asked. Before I could wonder if he could see my thoughts, he sat down beside me. “I know you are dreading tomorrow, but I don’t know how to fix that.”

My hands fell from my hair, leaving it halfway undone. “You don’t have to fix anything.”

Shadows made it hard to see him as he spoke, especially with his back to the stairwell, but the moonlight was generous enough to sink against the curves of his cheekbones and seep into the darkness of his eyes. They were fixed on me. “I feel like I do. We took you from the only home you knew, and are now asking you to watch other mortals fight to the death like they are nothing, when a month ago, you were just like them. That’s not an easy thing to ask. I’m sorry, Ruin.”

My heart swelled. It was easy to feel alone in a place like this, but part of me was seen.

He might not know my real name, but he knew some of my pain.

I dropped my eyes to my hands as they shifted against each other. “Honestly, a lot of it is guilt.”

I swallowed the lump that rose too quickly. “I feel guilty I’m here, in this gorgeous home, eating fresh vegetables from a garden every night, with Odin’s protection over me, while they are here to fight and die. I’m not certain I’m deserving of this.”

Even if I were a goddess, I’d feel undeserving. As a mortal, I felt less than deserving. I felt like a thief. Stealing kindness that wasn’t meant to be mine.

Ve thought for a moment, then replied, “From what you’ve told me of your life in Danmark, you didn’t receive good things often. You aren’t used to being treated well. What the champions will do this week—fighting, risking their lives—that’s all you’ve ever done.”

His hand slipped into mine, stilling their constant movement and tripping the beat of my heart. His voice came like a lyre’s soft music. “It’s time you were treated well. You’ve nothing to feel guilty about. And those mortals who fight don’t do it for themselves. Whoever wins brings back a decade of the gods’ favor for their clan.”

I knew that. It was a ritual begun by the first Vikings, who were desperate enough to offer up their own in return for the eyes of the gods. But we were not as foolish. The gods were there whether we offered living sacrifices or not, and we needed every fighter for our raids. It was an archaic ritual that needed to end.

But it was not one I could stop.

I focused on the look of his hand in mine, watching his fingers curl to cup my own. The gesture didn’t feel as romantic as it did comforting, in a friendly sort of manner, but it did the job. A warmth spread through my body, helping unwind some of my reserves.

“You can’t change what’s going to happen tomorrow,”

Ve echoed my thoughts. “The Champion Games can’t be stopped. But know that as you are watching, I will be right there beside you, helping you through.”

“Thank you,”

I whispered.

I wanted to ask about his sister. I wanted to do the same for him as he had done for me—unpack some of the pain and try to make it better. But the moment didn’t feel right. Perhaps he didn’t need to talk about it. Perhaps he did. But he stood up before I could decide and placed a gentle kiss on the back of my hand.

“My goddess,”

he breathed.

That was much nicer than ‘my delight.’ I could get used to that.

Ve moved for the door, leaving with one last reminder. “Two months here. Then we leave, and you’ll never have to watch a Champion Games again.”

Before he could leave, a question sprung to mind so quickly, it brought me to my feet. I’d almost forgotten. “Ve?”

He turned. “Is it possible for a god to allow a mortal to drink jravn and not die?”

I was giving away my doubts about my deity, but the question was too important to not ask.

He frowned and stepped back into the room. “Possible? Maybe.”

His hand went to his chin and he paced. “Probable?”

He let out a low whistle. “It’d take a powerful god to do it. Even then, I’m not convinced they’d pull it off. Especially like tonight. They would’ve needed to know you were drinking it at that exact moment, have given you some sort of tonic or charm first…”

His voice died off. He shook his head with resolution. “I don’t think it’s possible. You would have died tonight if you were mortal.”

“There’s no chance?”

I pressed. “If a god is toying with me here, I want to know.”

“I guarantee you,”

he replied. He crossed back to me, where he stood a pace away to let me look over him. He looked like a god. I didn’t. And no matter how many times someone called me one, I feared I’d never feel like more than an imposter. Gently, his fingers tipped my chin upwards to him. “You are a goddess,”

he said. “Through and through.”

The tightness was back in my chest when I woke, and I considered hiding instead of going to the arena. But Ve and I were to be presented there, and I didn’t want to put him in a difficult place by not showing up. Plus, he would be here soon, and I didn’t put it past him to drag me from bed, no matter how sweetly he’d said ‘my goddess’ last night.

So I swung my feet to the floor and stood.

My fingers inched to grab my brace and clip the axe to my back, then faltered.

Ve had been so kind last night. It was the least I could do to not wear an axe around him, when it reminded him of how his sister died.

I still put on a brace, but one for swords instead, and I clipped two in a cross behind my back.

Horses and the roll of a chariot sounded outside the window. I tied sandals to my feet and descended the stairwell just as Ve was opening the door.

He paused to take in the sight of me. I swore his eyes lingered on the swords in place of my axe, and he swallowed. Then he opened the door wider. “I’ll be the envy of every god there.”

“Let’s just get today over with.”