Page 5

SALT

I t was funny what money could buy. By finding the right information about the judge, I secured my daughter's safe return and full legal custody. I hadn’t swayed his decision about who should retain the guardianship of my daughter. I just made him hasten the process.

Tanya had been drunk when the case worker showed up and they’d immediately taken Neriah from her. I’d also found out that the reason that they had removed her from the last daycare was because there were marks and bruises that Tanya couldn’t explain. It made sense why she was weird about me taking Neriah out of her house sometimes. I didn’t press charges like I wanted to for some of the shit that she’d pulled. Instead, I was happy that she couldn’t do any more harm from the hole that she’d crawled out of.

I’d taken about two weeks of jumping through hoops to get everything together, and now everything was settling back down. I’d planned to take Lauren out to dinner tonight and spend some real time with her. She’d been patient and understanding and though we’d only been seeing each other for a little over two months, I was feeling her. Neriah looked forward to being with her, too.

My trips out of town were to secure a new distributor since we needed more product than our current one could supply. Plus, he was also supplying our enemies, and that was bad for business. The new guy seemed like a better deal, so I’d pitched him to the Ekon brothers and we’d met with him while I was away. With that handled, I needed time to regroup and ground myself. That’s what Neriah and Lauren did to me. Helped me regain my sanity.

I picked up my cell and called Lauren to make plans for us tonight. When she answered, she sounded cold and distant. As if something had happened to her, knocking her out of being her usual self.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” I asked her.

“This thing between us was supposed to be temporary, and it’s become bigger than that. We need to slow things down.” She said almost robotically.

“Temporary? No. I was very clear that there was nothing temporary about it. I’m tired of random women throwing themselves at me, expecting me to let them into my life, and they have nothing to offer. That’s what this thing is to me. Not sure what it is to you. But for me, I’m playing for keeps.” I stood up from my dining room table and ran my hand over my head.

“No. That’s not what I wanted. I needed something temporary. I can’t afford another relationship, not like… I’m sorry if the wires were crossed somehow. Salt, I don’t know why they would match me with someone who wanted something that I didn’t. I wouldn’t have played with your feelings that way.”

“So, are you telling me that you don’t feel this thing between us? How when we’re together everything feels right, but then when we’re apart, nothing does? Something must have happened. Talk to me.” I sighed, losing hope for the first time.

Dr. Cushions warned me about this. She explained to me that Lauren was running from her past and that she was trying to escape it by trying something temporary. In all the ways, though, Lauren and I made sense. But even when we didn’t, we still did. Dr. Cushions had even warned me about the drawbacks. That was because Lauren only wanted something casual, she could still walk away from this situation unscathed. It was a risk that I would take. I’d told her that after meeting Lauren for the first time. I knew she was the one, so why weren’t things lining up the way they needed to? Was I really about to lose her? My original request had been for something temporary, but things had changed. Dr. Cushions didn’t think it was a good idea. Maybe she was right.

“I’m not happy. None of that matters!” She yelled into the phone. “We can’t keep doing this to one another.”

“Doing what, exactly, Lauren? Hmm? Why didn’t you say so? That you were unhappy.” Confused as fuck, I gripped the chair in front of me, wanting to break it in half. This was supposed to be a conversation about dinner, not a fucking breakup.

“Escaping from our worlds into one another’s arms. You’ll meet someone else that is right for you. Maybe the same will happen for me, too.”

“Lauren–”

“Or maybe this was what we were meant to do. Enriching each other’s lives and move on.”

“Lauren–” I paced faster as my patience grew shorter.

“Salt, let’s just be done. It’s over. I’d appreciate it if you got your things, so we can move on as soon as possible.”

“Because you decided?” I roared.

“Yes. Because I decided.”

“Just like that?” I scoffed angrily.

“Yes. It’s for the best.”

“Not a problem. Just to be clear, you’re refusing to talk about this?” Communication was the only thing I’d made mandatory in this relationship. She was hell-bent on keeping whatever had brought this on to herself.

“You know everything that you need to.”

“I’ll be to get my things later and I’ll leave your key. You should have told me you weren’t happy. Said something to me so that this abrupt need to end things didn’t blind me. Don’t wait for me by the door, Lauren.” I disconnected the call, picked up the vase that was on the table, and threw it at the wall, shattering it immediately.

“Fuuuuuuuuuuck!” I roared.

I stormed through the house until I got to my bedroom. What I wanted to do was go to her and fuck sense into her, but instead, I got dressed and drove to the gun range, where shooting bullets into a sheet of paper wasn’t satisfactory enough. The owner let me around back where he’d set up an obstacle course to run, shoot, and fire as much as you needed to at moving objects.

That did the trick.

By the time I left, I was sweaty, and my energy dissipated. I still had to get to Lauren’s house to get my shit out. Mostly clothes that I’d taken off while I was there. It should all fit inside a suitcase. I could go for some of that bourbon she’d bought me right about now, too. I’d gotten rid of all the alcohol from here because of Neriah’s caseworkers and the concern about alcohol usage. Though, I loved bourbon, so she’d bought me some for when I was at her place. Looking at the time, I knew I’d better get over there before she got off work. I didn’t think I could handle seeing her right now without wanting to talk sense into her. I showered and dressed, took a suitcase with me, and prepared to make this last trip to her place.